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Last updated on August 9th, 2017 at 04:28 am

A lively first hour of the Ashes.

UPDATE. And a rockin’ first day.

Posted by Tim B. on 11/22/2006 at 08:55 PM
    1. Cricket, right?

      Posted by paco on 2006 11 22 at 09:05 PM • permalink


    1. Its time to fix the mistake we made in England. Also, if those pommie bastards think that they are going to take the urn back home with them – THINK AGAIN!!!

      Here’s looking forward to a nice long hot summer of humiliating cricket for the old enemy.

      Posted by rbresca on 2006 11 22 at 09:08 PM • permalink


    1. The only half decant (speed wise) live internet feed that I can receive on my work system is an unofficial commentary with two Indian guys…hilarious.
      Go Australia!

      Posted by Mattofact on 2006 11 22 at 09:09 PM • permalink


    1. Whoa – Hayden out! He was only plodding along anyway. At least they have taken the shine off the ball.

      Posted by rbresca on 2006 11 22 at 09:38 PM • permalink


    1. rbresca – its only a replica they’ve sent out.  The arrogant turds never let the real Ashes urn leave Lords.

      Posted by Stop Continental Drift! on 2006 11 22 at 09:59 PM • permalink


    1. #5 – no mate – it’s for real this time!!!

      the real thing

      It shall not leave these shores!!!!

      Posted by rbresca on 2006 11 22 at 10:11 PM • permalink


    1. Cricket is a funny game, the Chinese would have done very well at it, but the Italians, nah.

      Posted by Nic on 2006 11 22 at 10:17 PM • permalink


    1. Anyone here actually going to any Tests? We were unlucky not getting tickets like millions of others, so for the first time in years we won’t be at the SCG on the first day

      When I get to work at 4pm – the telly in the surgery waiting room will be changed to the cricket – our lovely young receptionists like the arvo soapies and quiz shows

      Posted by aussiemagpie on 2006 11 22 at 10:19 PM • permalink


    1. #7 nic

      The Italians would be falling over all the time

      Posted by aussiemagpie on 2006 11 22 at 10:20 PM • permalink


    1. #7 Reminds me of the Python skit, “Yesh, I prayed clicket in Colnwarr”.

      BTW, who’s Ashes are being played for?

      Posted by JDB on 2006 11 22 at 10:34 PM • permalink


    1. I’m off to day 2 of Melbourne and days 3 & 4 of Sydney. We normally go to Sydney, and it was touch and go this year. It took my brother and I 4 hours on the morning tickets were released to get them for this year.

      Looking forward to it.

      Posted by Fleety on 2006 11 22 at 10:35 PM • permalink


    1. Langer’s spanking ‘em like closing time at an S&M club.

      Posted by Infidel Tiger on 2006 11 22 at 10:48 PM • permalink


    1. You’ve got to hand it to channel 9 for inventing new ways to present the cricket. I just saw them use their new “Hot Spot” view.  I was wondering at first why they were using what looked like a negative print of the action replay. Seems they’re using infra-red to show where the ball has hit the bat.

      Posted by Francis H on 2006 11 22 at 10:51 PM • permalink


    1. #12 fleety

      Goodonya for getting tickets – my partner, his brother, and other assorted family all tried with no luck

      Have a great time – I’ll watch out for you on the telly!

      Posted by aussiemagpie on 2006 11 22 at 10:52 PM • permalink


    1. #14 – Hope they use the “hot-spot” camera when they bone the presenters of the Today Show.

      Posted by Infidel Tiger on 2006 11 22 at 10:53 PM • permalink


    1. < YAWNS >

      Oh shit, I slept through the first session!  Oh well, we won the toss and have knocked up 100 odd before lunch.  Thats a fair start in anyones language…

      #7, The Chinese will do very well at the game, they only started forcing the folks in their ‘workers paradise’ to play the game a couple of years back.  If you’ve ever played the game at any level, even school, you can get a job teaching the Chinese to play.  At least you could two years ago.

      “It was a gift, a symbol of rivalry but also of friendship. It was not meant to be a trophy. Having given it to us, it would be wrong to ask for it back.” – the BBC link above

      What utter gobshite, the POME’s are just poor losers.  It became the most sought after trophy in world cricket as the rivalry developed over the years.

      Posted by The_Wizard_of_WOZ on 2006 11 22 at 10:56 PM • permalink


    1. I’ve got a day ticket to the Melbourne test. Hopefully I can sit above both groups of yahoos and watch the fun without having to be in the beer soaked middle.

      Posted by Nic on 2006 11 22 at 10:57 PM • permalink


    1. aussiemagpie

      The Italians would be falling over all the time.

      And my family in Corleone would make sure that once they fell, they stayed that way…lol.

      Posted by El Cid on 2006 11 22 at 10:57 PM • permalink


    1. Ponting looks to be in finer touch than a pervert on the Tokyo subway.

      Posted by Infidel Tiger on 2006 11 22 at 11:01 PM • permalink


    1. Mock as I may it exists!  The world will never be the same.

      Posted by Nic on 2006 11 22 at 11:03 PM • permalink


    1. #19 el cid

      Looked at your link – are you related to the Mustache Petes then ? LOL!

      I’d like to see cricket make it big in the US – there would be music, cheerleaders, and soon all the players would be wearing those funny tights like the players in your footy and baseball

      Posted by aussiemagpie on 2006 11 22 at 11:06 PM • permalink


    1. #5 I think the Ashes Urn is actually a privately owned trophy, merely displayed at Lords. The aristo family that owns it hasn’t always been keen for it to go on tour.

      Posted by C.L. on 2006 11 22 at 11:07 PM • permalink


    1. Security Rottweilers confiscate an inflatable balloon that was clearly threatening public order.

      OK, see, this is why I’ll never understand cricket. Could one of you Underlanders explain this?

      Do you have Police dogs in uniform?

      Aren’t all balloons inflatable by definition?

      And, how can a inflatable balloon threaten public order? Or, is that what we up here call an “inflatable doll”? I could see that amongst a bunch of drunken, horny males.

      Posted by rinardman on 2006 11 22 at 11:12 PM • permalink


    1. The Ashes A brief history.

      Rinardman, inflatable dolls usually appear at One Day Internationals, a less serious form of the game. They too are confiscted by security, who then spend the following winter deflating them in an unorthodox style.

      Posted by Infidel Tiger on 2006 11 22 at 11:19 PM • permalink


    1. #24, Basically in the last few years, the hired goons at cricket grounds around Australia have decided that a beach ball is a serious danger to pulic safety.

      Mayhaps the old fogies in the clubrooms dont like to see the ‘riff raff’ (myself included) enjoying the game more than they did back in the day.

      We pay for our tickets (when we can get them), we pay for our weak beer.  We also sneak in vast quantities of spirits to make up for the weak beer.  And we sit in the sun all day drinking.  Wheres the harm in a beach ball or 5?

      Posted by The_Wizard_of_WOZ on 2006 11 22 at 11:20 PM • permalink


    1. #25, LOL, yeah thats about right I’d say…

      Posted by The_Wizard_of_WOZ on 2006 11 22 at 11:21 PM • permalink


    1. #24, this is one reason why we have ‘ball nazis”

      Botham the Pig
      By the Ashes tour of 1982-83, Ian Botham was beginning to fill out around the waist and was no longer the swing-bowling sylph of his heyday. That was good enough for the crowd at The Gabba, who smuggled a piglet in through the turnstiles (by stuffing an apple in its mouth and convincing the steward he was soon to be lunch), then released him on the outfield with “Botham” scrawled on one flank, and “Eddie” (in tribute to the equally rotund Eddie Hemmings) on the other. For anyone contemplating a similar stunt this winter, make sure your pig isn’t sponsored. Concerns about ambush marketing mean you’d probably have more chance of getting it in than a can of Coke.

      Posted by Nic on 2006 11 22 at 11:28 PM • permalink


    1. aussiemagpie

      are you related to the Mustache Petes then?

      Oh my no…the family just has many business’s…as in funeral parlors and cemeteries.

      Mustache Petes…never heard of them…;).

      Posted by El Cid on 2006 11 22 at 11:40 PM • permalink


    1. #15 aussiemagpie, that was the first time in ages I’ve seen “partner” used in its traditional sense.

      Yeah, tickets are real hard to come by.  My cricket-mad Pommy mate managed to get some for the first two days in Brisbane (travelling up from Sydney) but he had to go through a contact back in UK.

      Posted by anthony_r on 2006 11 22 at 11:40 PM • permalink


    1. Cricket is great, but I hate the fucking Ashes for the simple reason that I am a bartender. I will be spending the next four days (I’m talking ALL day and all night) serving the Barmy Army and feral Australian cricket fans (whatever they call those). I expect there’ll be a lot of off-key singing, jeering and drunks.

      Posted by Fiona on 2006 11 22 at 11:53 PM • permalink


    1. Cowboy up Fiona, such is the life of a bar(wo)man.

      By the way, feral Aussie cricket fans are trying to earn the title of the ‘Booney Army’.  However due to increased airliner speeds, it is now almost impossible to knock back 52 cans of beer on the flight from Sydney to London.

      We can only try.

      Posted by The_Wizard_of_WOZ on 2006 11 23 at 12:03 AM • permalink


    1. #29 el cid

      It’s OK I won’t reveal your assumed identity – you can live in peace

      Posted by aussiemagpie on 2006 11 23 at 12:12 AM • permalink


    1. Piss off Martyn, you’re out.  Hussey in – now we’re into the tail.

      Posted by pommygranate on 2006 11 23 at 12:21 AM • permalink


    1. #34, Oh great, just what we need, a delusional POME…

      Posted by The_Wizard_of_WOZ on 2006 11 23 at 12:27 AM • permalink


    1. #34, Erm, I mean #33.  Be nice, I’m hungover.

      Hang on, methinks there was a post deleted between #5 and #12…

      Posted by The_Wizard_of_WOZ on 2006 11 23 at 12:30 AM • permalink


    1. rebesca @ #6:
      #5 – no mate – it’s for real this time!!!

      Hmmm…  OK, but it WAS a BBC source you linked to.  I wouldn’t trust anything a Pom said about the cricket.

      Aussie papers are reporting that its a replica urn.  OK, OK it is the Age, so I won’t necessarily believe it’s report either.  The news copy might have been near Terry ‘Macbeth’ Lane’s desk.

      Posted by Stop Continental Drift! on 2006 11 23 at 12:50 AM • permalink


    1. Pommygranate the only poms into the tail are the barmy army who have given up on their team and headed for Fortitude Valley

      Posted by Francis H on 2006 11 23 at 01:08 AM • permalink


    1. Didn’t take long for Bowden to play the showman, rasing his finger to scratch his nose after a big lbw appeal.


      Posted by brucey bonus on 2006 11 23 at 01:21 AM • permalink


    1. Bloody Billy Bowden. Probably googles his name at the end of everyday’s play.

      Posted by Infidel Tiger on 2006 11 23 at 01:48 AM • permalink


    1. Congrats Punter!

      The cricinfo commentary is brilliant. Full of snide asides and probably baffling as hell to non-cricket followers.

      “Massive acclaim from the Gabba,” confirms Andrew Miller. “They were out of their seats from the moment that shot was played.”

      64.6 Hoggard to Ponting, 3 runs, works that one on to the on-side and that’s Ponting’s 32nd Test hundred, his sixth against England, and he celebrates by dissecting the air with a big swoosh and then taking off his helmet, his grin as wide as a Cheshire cat’s. The Gabba rises to its feet as one and there are huge cheers and whistles around the ground. He’s looked unstoppable today and that’s his 10th hundred in 15 Tests, dating back to his Old Trafford epic in 2005

      Posted by Infidel Tiger on 2006 11 23 at 01:58 AM • permalink


    1. The Ashes Streamed Live

      for those who like to listen.

      Posted by kae on 2006 11 23 at 02:14 AM • permalink


    1. #41 oops
      forget that. Not available outside Aus.

      Posted by kae on 2006 11 23 at 02:15 AM • permalink


    1. and I hit submit button before I checked it.

      Posted by kae on 2006 11 23 at 02:15 AM • permalink


    1. Another ton; Punter you legend.  Now at #7 on all time run scorers list.

      Actually, infidel, something like the quote you gave from crickinfo should be in a test for prospective new immigrants.  Here’s question #1:

      <your quote>.  Dicuss.

      Posted by Stop Continental Drift! on 2006 11 23 at 02:17 AM • permalink


    1. #44 SCD

      New Immigrant: I am taking it that this Gabba is some kind of deity and The Ponting is performing tricks as to appease it?

      Immigration officer: Spot on, Manjid. Here is your cork hat, esky and Citizenship. Have a bonza day, sport!

      Posted by Infidel Tiger on 2006 11 23 at 02:34 AM • permalink


    1. Is it too early to start breaking out the English cricket jokes yet?
      The ones we loved to tell up until about half way through the last ashes series.

      Posted by Hank Reardon on 2006 11 23 at 02:48 AM • permalink


    1. Stumps Day 1 Aussies well on top.

      Score: 3/346 off 90 overs. Our Captain, Punter, 137 not out.

      The Poms drag themselves off the field, weary and dispirited.

      Time for a coldie!

      Posted by Stop Continental Drift! on 2006 11 23 at 03:33 AM • permalink


    1. #46 Yes, true. It could be that as the series goes on the English may bounce back. However I have to say that so far the signs are not good – in fact pretty dismal. Apart from their valiant captain the rest look like a bunch of plonkers who belong with the Barmy Army and not in the middle.

      However on the same note although it is always painful to watch a team get a drubbing here every season – I have no problems in watching England or New Zealand get absolutely bloody humiliated!!!! If they put up a fight and come back all the better – I can’t lose.

      ps – I have a feeling that Warnie will get his tonne this season – must be about his last chance.

      Posted by rbresca on 2006 11 23 at 04:00 AM • permalink


    1. I was on a train heading into Perth and plugged into the ABC commentary, as were many of the passengers, when Justin Langer (WA’s Favourite Son) was dismissed for 82. All you could hear from all over the place was various oaths and expletives, including one filthy outburst from a sweet little old lady which would have shocked a sailor on shore leave.

      Posted by Pedro the Ignorant on 2006 11 23 at 04:02 AM • permalink


    1. That’s shocking, Pedro. You use public transport?

      Posted by Infidel Tiger on 2006 11 23 at 04:14 AM • permalink


    1. #49 Alfie Langer as Favourite Son?

      I’d have thought Gilly would have given him a real run for that title.

      Regardless it was a rattling good knock from Langer. Martyn OTOH was pretty unlucky.

      Posted by Ozwitch on 2006 11 23 at 04:20 AM • permalink


    1. Unless it rains, McGrath will be proved right and it’s gonna be 5-0. Good to see true order restored to the cricketing world.

      Posted by brucey bonus on 2006 11 23 at 05:09 AM • permalink


    1. Just got back from the Gabba.  Had a great day.  We sat the next tier directly up from the Pomms and their so called “army”.  They were very quiet as our boys waded through some very lame bowling from nearly all the Pommy bowlers, except for maybe Freddie.  Things got very quiet at the end of the day (on the field) and this seemed to be enough reason for the Pomms to start making a lot of noise.  #23, the ball nazis were everywhere today, although I did see one of the boys in blue that kindly lobbed one back into the croud.

      Posted by 8_8_8 on 2006 11 23 at 05:17 AM • permalink


    1. I was going to get on the turps, IT, (#50) hence the shame of consorting with the great unwashed.

      The wallopers take a dim view of driving Gaia destroying vehicles when over some arbitrary blood alcohol limit.
      Mind you, the tutu wearing baton grabber girlie thing would go over .05 on a small shandy or two, so I suppose several gallons of Swan Draught would not endear me to them.

      Ask Sam Ward (aka the Yobbo) about Perth wallopers.

      Posted by Pedro the Ignorant on 2006 11 23 at 05:21 AM • permalink


    1. Ozwitch, (#51)
      Gilly is up there as the Favourite Son, especially with the old dears who think he is a “lovely boy, and ever so well spoken”, but he is considered a “blow in” who stole the WA wicketkeeper’s berth from Timmy Zoehrer, and was regularly cursed by the grubby little schoolboys from Trinity College (located next door to the WACA) whenever he played for WA.

      JL, however, loves to grind the opposition into the dirt and spit on the remains, therefore he is loved by all Sandgropers.

      Nobody ever said Sandgropers were not parochial.

      Posted by Pedro the Ignorant on 2006 11 23 at 05:35 AM • permalink


    1. I lived in WA for a time.  Have seen a Test match in every state of Australia except South Australia (and Tassy – but they dont count).

      While in WA, I saw a Glenn McGrath hat trick in Perth with Lara as one of the three victims. No bunnies in that hat trick.  Spoke to Brett Lee over the fence when he was bowling but he didnt listen. My advise was: make him play.  Pity. He could still use that particular advice.

      Posted by Fleety on 2006 11 23 at 06:28 AM • permalink


    1. Got back from the Gabba about an hour ago (Gabba/the Pineapple/the Storey Bridge hotel, take your pick). Great day of cricket, sun and $5.50 mid-strength beers.

      It certainly looked to me like England were lacking a second (and a third and a fourth) bowler, and there’s only so much Freddie Flintoff can do. Harmison was good in very, very short bursts, Giles is second rate and Hoggard and Anderson were pretty well non-entities.

      #30 Fiona – Where do you work? I consider myself very well behaved with bar staff, but I’ll ensure I lay off on the off-key singing from now on.

      Posted by AnthonyC on 2006 11 23 at 07:03 AM • permalink


    1. Just returned from the Gabba. Slightly sunburned and three parts wacked.
      A great days cricket. Flintoff was the only bowler who looked like taking wickets and without any swing the others looked pedestrian. Langer and Ponting played very well but Hayden looked out of sorts.
      Saw a large contingent of the Balmy Army trudging sadly along the road afterwards. Their pasty white arms, legs and faces horribly reddened by the Brisbane sun. They wont feel it tonight of course, they were too pissed, but tomorrow will be another story.
      I have tickets for five days but I don’t think I’ll need the one for day 5.

      Posted by Whale Spinor on 2006 11 23 at 07:09 AM • permalink


    1. Can anybody confirm that the arse-bandits*, who’ve hijacked my beloved Gabba, made everybody check their bags into a cloakroom before the game?

      My understanding is that the delay was 45 minutes and thousands of spectators missed out on the first overs of the match.

      Disgraceful.  Absolutely bloody disgraceful.

      * led from the front by that deceitful little turd Chris Cochrane

      Posted by murph on 2006 11 23 at 07:11 AM • permalink


    1. I watch the cricket from far, far away, and the service comes from India.  One of the most enjoyable bits is seeing the adverts between overs – a real insight into the modern culture of the sub-continent.  Favourite today is a nerdy fan jabbering away at suave cricket great (didn’t recognize him – my memory stops at Kapil Dev) who’s trying to enjoy his new Bill Bryson book.  The juxtapositions of all these different cultures (Ashes cricket, Bryson books, Indian marketing) is almost as much fun as watching the Poms getting their well-deserved drubbing.

      Stopped watching when the score was 3/343 (say it out loud)

      Posted by rampisadmukerjee on 2006 11 23 at 07:20 AM • permalink


    1. For the sake of the Sarth Efricans (who score cricket their own way), thats 343/3

      Posted by rampisadmukerjee on 2006 11 23 at 07:22 AM • permalink


    1. If England look like they are losing, I have paid for Al Gore to sit in the stadium!

      Snow will stop play.

      Muhaha you Sons of Pigs and Convicts.

      Posted by Rob Read on 2006 11 23 at 07:36 AM • permalink


    1. #59 Murph,

      I do believe that ‘arse clown’ is more PC.

      Posted by Nic on 2006 11 23 at 09:44 AM • permalink


    1. # 31 The_Wizard_of_WOZ – I love it really; I was just feeling a little ill and not looking forward to the crowds/felt like having a whinge. But it was great today! The punters were actually pretty lovely. Oh and I saw a lot of ‘Booney Army’ shirts.

      #57 anthony1982 – Chalk Hotel.. down the road from the Gabba.

      Posted by Fiona on 2006 11 23 at 12:24 PM • permalink


    1. Australians describing themselves as the “Booney Army”, that’s unique.  Booney = boondock, a tagalog (Philippines) word for out in the country.  A good definition is here.  (The word was introduced into English by the US military.)

      In the US, “boondockers” are particularly clunky shoes, the word adopted from the US Navy.  (And yes, when I was in the Navy I had a pair of shoes just like those.)

      America – Corrupting the Queen’s English for Over Two Hundred Years.

      Posted by David Crawford on 2006 11 23 at 02:13 PM • permalink


    1. #65.  Boony is a former great player for Australia, and current selector of the Aussie Cricket Team.

      Legend has it he downed 52 tinnies (cans of beer) on one flight from aust. to england many years ago.

      Posted by Fleety on 2006 11 23 at 04:49 PM • permalink


    1. Fleety – although there is just a hint of scandle when it was suggested that a couple of those beers may have been consumed in the passenger lounge during the stopover in Singapore, and not in flight as per the ‘rule’ !

      Posted by Stop Continental Drift! on 2006 11 23 at 05:26 PM • permalink


    1. #64 Fiona – will make a point of looking out for the Chalk Hotel tomorrow.  Is it close to the Gabba?

      Anyone else there tomorrow (Sat)?  Will shout a round if we have had a good morning session.

      Posted by pommygranate on 2006 11 23 at 06:25 PM • permalink


    1. Day 2.  First Session.  Drinks.

      Pom bowlers spraying wides around like an under 14 side.  Geez, if I was a Pom (shudder) I reckon I’d get a go in this side.

      Punter goes beyond 150, Hussey good in support – nearing 100.

      Abd Lara Bingle being interviewed on the sidelines.

      Ah!  A pretty good day so far.

      Posted by Stop Continental Drift! on 2006 11 23 at 09:03 PM • permalink


    1. Re #40 I think Infidel Tiger commentary (#12, #19) would liven it up, no end.

      Posted by Margos Maid on 2006 11 23 at 09:14 PM • permalink


    1. This Pommy bowling attack couldn’t get Liberace out.

      Posted by Infidel Tiger on 2006 11 23 at 09:23 PM • permalink


    1. Damn my stupid big mouth to hell.

      Posted by Infidel Tiger on 2006 11 23 at 09:28 PM • permalink


    1. If we can’t get a good contest then at least we can enjoy the spectacle of a bloody good humiliation of this sub-standard english team – always a pleasure old chaps! Assume the position!

      How this bunch of snoozers ever got their paws on the ashes is beyond me.

      Posted by rbresca on 2006 11 23 at 09:30 PM • permalink


    1. #71 Don’t feel too bad. Hussey was not exactly setting the world on fire out there.

      86 from 187 balls? zzzzzzzzzz

      Posted by rbresca on 2006 11 23 at 09:32 PM • permalink


    1. re: Hussey. When your captain is well in and going for a cenruty, reaches 150+, and is aiming at a a double ton, rbresca, you take a more “workmanlike” approach to your batting in support—IMHO.

      He was doing exactly what he was meant to do, and I, for one, am not about to sledge him for racking up 87 in support of the greatest batsman in cricket.

      Posted by MentalFloss on 2006 11 23 at 09:44 PM • permalink


    1. cenruty=century.


      Posted by MentalFloss on 2006 11 23 at 09:45 PM • permalink


    1. #55 thanks Pedro. Like Tasmania it seems – you’re either born a Tasmanian, or you’re not a Tasmanian.

      I suspect Gilly might be a Sandgroper when he makes a century, but if he drops a catch he rapidly reverts to being a ‘blow-in’?

      Posted by Ozwitch on 2006 11 23 at 10:13 PM • permalink


    1. #56 Fleety. You were one of the lucky ones that managed to get inside the gate on time that morning, huh?

      Posted by Ozwitch on 2006 11 23 at 10:14 PM • permalink


    1. Well Gillie may have played a bit for W.A. when he first came across, until Healy retired from the national team, but lets face in the last 6-7-8 years we have hardly seen him playing for W.A. with there being so much international cricket…

      So yeah while its nice that he has done well (although the last few years have been a bit patchy and the poms had him all sorted out last ashes series), its hard to get really excited about him as a West Aussie when we never see him and he never plays for us these days…

      And I recall we won the first test last series and everyone was predicting white washes and 5-0 drubbings, I suggest we all just hold off a little longer, especially our aussie team members, because after all their bragging and carrying on, they looked like absolute tools when that last ashes tour got off to a bad start and never got much better…

      Posted by casanova on 2006 11 23 at 10:19 PM • permalink


    1. #79 Casanova. Why not keep grinnin’ when yer winnin? If it goes bad, then be sad…

      We’re in the stands, after all, not on the pitch.

      Posted by MentalFloss on 2006 11 23 at 10:30 PM • permalink


    1. #75 Point well taken however on a belter of a pitch, facing a wayward english attack and having such a good reputation and not to score a bit more freely is just a bit disappointing that is all.

      Posted by rbresca on 2006 11 23 at 10:43 PM • permalink


    1. casanova.  What about us poor Tasmanians and Ricky Ponting?  Not only do we never have him playing for Tasmania (although he still oficially “plays” for us), but he actually lives in Sydney now (his missus, you see…).

      I went to a club or charity match last year when the Punter was actually playing.  Huge crowd for a club/charity game.  When Punter got out, 9/10 of the crowd left!

      Posted by Stop Continental Drift! on 2006 11 23 at 10:49 PM • permalink


    1. #80 While the Aussie team was all conquering for a decade, we are now ageing, and other teams have improved somewhat…  It isn’t always a case of us going out and despatching easy beats these days…

      Last Ashes tour we went over there and everyone from former players Kim Hughes, to team members Glenn McGrath, were mouthing off about 4-0 and 5-0 whitewashes and sinking the boot in the Poms…

      From the first tour matches against county sides our tour started to fall apart, psychologically I’m sure our players thought another trouncing was in the offing, it would all fall into their laps…  We entered the one day comp, Symmons (or however u spell it) got drunk, we lost to zimbabwe or kenya or some african team we should NEVER lose to, not even with suburban cricketers…

      And after that it was just one sorry cock up after another….  The different between our somewhat arrogant mouthings off, and the results we ended up being subjected too couldn’t have been more different and we rightly got the shellacking we deserved for being up ourselves…  There were lots of things not to like about the Poms (their 12th man substitution policy, etc), and they did get lucky, but they also played well and i think some of our guys took their eyes of the ball…

      I was then, and still am now, of the opinion that maybe we tone down the talk, pull some heads in and put some tails up, and let the results start to do a bit more of the talking…  if we’re 3-0 up half way through, great, then lets start talking about whitewahses and crappy, embarrassing english teams, but after 4 sessions i feel it might be a bit soon to dump all over this english team…  When you mouth off early you run the risk of looking like braggarts and fools if you can’t back it up later on, and its a long summer ahead, although hopefully a good one from our point of view…

      And also lets face it, if a few misguided types start spouting off about 5-0 thumpings, its a pretty difficult (read impossible) standard to hold yourself up to…  I can almost guarantee we are not going to win all 5 matches for weather or any number of reasons, so why start crapping on that that is the level of excellence we are holding ourselves too???  I’ll be happy with 2-0 or 3-1 etc…

      Sorry for the length of the post, but a little more class by some of our team members/former players and little less mouthing off probably wouldn’t do us any harm at all….

      Posted by casanova on 2006 11 23 at 10:49 PM • permalink


    1. Bugger, bugger, bugger!  Out in the 190s!

      Posted by Stop Continental Drift! on 2006 11 23 at 11:26 PM • permalink


    1. I am in complete agreement with you Casanova—with respect to the team and, for that matter, anyone associated with the team (commentators included).

      But I’m just a fan, and as such, I’m gonna enjoy it without worrying about much more than whether there’s enough beer in the fridge.

      No worries, mate, I’ll be spittin chips with the best of ‘em, if the “Bing”-a-ling goes all funny-buggers or Warnie leaks runs at 6+ an over (I’ve seen him do it).

      Meantime, like Matthew (I think): “Therefore don’t be anxious for tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Each day’s own evil is sufficient.”

      Posted by MentalFloss on 2006 11 23 at 11:27 PM • permalink


    1. Gilly out for a Duck?

      Posted by MentalFloss on 2006 11 23 at 11:29 PM • permalink


    1. Well, casanova, maybe “tomorrow” is arrivèd…

      Posted by MentalFloss on 2006 11 23 at 11:31 PM • permalink


    1. We’re capitulating like a Victorian copper facing a tutu wearing, vegan, lesbian.

      Posted by Infidel Tiger on 2006 11 23 at 11:32 PM • permalink


    1. #88…brandishing a dildo.

      Posted by MentalFloss on 2006 11 23 at 11:34 PM • permalink


    1. Warne shovels one and gets a life—Anderson grasses it…what a stupid shot…

      Posted by MentalFloss on 2006 11 23 at 11:36 PM • permalink


    1. #89 Well some of those things are quite intimidating!

      If you’re not reading the cricinfo commentary, you’re missing out on some rip snorting stuff.

      Posted by Infidel Tiger on 2006 11 23 at 11:37 PM • permalink


    1. It’s “game on” if they’re all out for under 500…

      Posted by MentalFloss on 2006 11 23 at 11:38 PM • permalink


    1. Infidel, at work (s’like a graveyard here, everyone’s gone home) streaming radio commentary from the link above.

      Posted by MentalFloss on 2006 11 23 at 11:41 PM • permalink


    1. Now Hoggy’s the King of the swingers, An England VIP
      He has a bowl, we have a song, The Aussies out by tea
      Oohh Oohh Oohh, I wanna bowl like you-ou-ou
      Don’t wanna bat like you, just bowl like you do-o-o
      Oh yeah it’s true-ue-ue
      I wanna bowl like you-ou-ou
      Don’t wanna bat like you, just bowl like you-ou-ou.

      to the tune of the Jungle Book Song

      Posted by pommygranate on 2006 11 23 at 11:45 PM • permalink


    1. It’s like half the country’s found work to do outside the office.

      Posted by Infidel Tiger on 2006 11 23 at 11:46 PM • permalink


    1. MF, I’ve just seen to many middle order collapses over the last few years from this team, to many chokes when we thought we were cruising, to get over confident…

      This team has shown itself more than capable of losing 3 wickets for 20 runs or so when we’re travelling smoothly…  So I’ve just learnt never to get over confident till the runs are on the board and we’re back in the pavillion…

      The same applies for our bowlers, they can go through opponents like a dose of salts on some occasions, but their proclivity to bowl no balls last tour, and even worse take wickets from them, was an absolute disgrace…  If I was the coach some of them would have been manning the drinks trolley till they learnt to keep their big feet behind the damn line, or paying some damn big fines…  Not much to ask from professionals I don’t think….

      And Gillie unfortunately has gone from being a dominator of attacks and a joy to watch, to being a bit of a bunny…  He just hasn’t put in the hard work to make the adjustments to his games to counteract the strategies opponents are using against him increasingly successfully…

      But anyway, lets hope we right the ship and our bowlers come out and do the business….  :o)

      Posted by casanova on 2006 11 23 at 11:49 PM • permalink


    1. On’ya, Cas. No argument from me. Gilchrist…how mighty are the fallen?

      Pommygranate: sing ye, sing ye loud. There is yet the chorus to be sung and yet a new refrain…

      (Awww…screw this—that RAID array is not going to synch any faster for my watching it—I’m off down the Pub.)

      Posted by MentalFloss on 2006 11 24 at 12:02 AM • permalink


    1. Hmmmmmm…..

      Posted by casanova on 2006 11 24 at 12:10 AM • permalink


    1. Let’s see what Lee can contribute….

      Posted by casanova on 2006 11 24 at 12:11 AM • permalink


    1. #82 Cassanova.  Agreed with the mouthing off of the Aussie players.

      Glenn McGrath said 5-0 last Ashes series, and he did the SAME this series too.  What a tool. Great bowler but man, he had egg on his face.

      He said anything else is just admitting we are going to lose one, and we dont want to do that.

      Posted by Fleety on 2006 11 24 at 12:17 AM • permalink


    1. I think no one but the fairies and Glenn McGrath thinks we are going to win every test Fleety, we won’t necessarily lose one, but more than a few tests end in draws, and afterall we are not invincible so losing a test is not beyond comprehension…

      Anyway, rather than nominate a final result, why not learn from the last foot-in-mouth exercise and just say “That we will be going into each match looking to win it!”???

      Demonstrates the aggresive, confident mindset we have, without giving the opponents something to fire them up…  Something most coaches/players in football and other sports learnt long ago????  Its all “one game at a time”, “not getting ahead of ourselves” etc..  All the old cliches that have stood the test of time…  :o)

      Posted by casanova on 2006 11 24 at 12:28 AM • permalink


    1. It appears that the security are been tougher on cricket fans having a sing-a-long and playing with a beachball than the cops were, when dealing with G20 rioters destroying public property.

      Symptomatic of what happens when you turn a country into a fucking nanny state.

      Posted by Infidel Tiger on 2006 11 24 at 12:31 AM • permalink


    1. I told you Gilly was a blow in. (until the next innings, anyway)

      ABC radio commentary is excellent as usual, although Fleming is coming over as a bit of a know all.

      Their cricket commentary is the only reason I don’t howl for the ABC to be abolished and give me back my eight cents a day.

      Posted by Pedro the Ignorant on 2006 11 24 at 12:37 AM • permalink


    1. Indeed, we’ll “do it for the boys”,

      Not even last year did we win every test.  We drew in Perth where it was a road. (Incidently, that is why Hodge I think is no good. He scored 200+ but it was on a road.  I dont rate him).

      Posted by Fleety on 2006 11 24 at 12:41 AM • permalink


    1. Pedro, listening to ABC radio commentary on my phone’s radio.  It’s excellent, but I wish Kerry O would stop talking about his cricket career 20+ years ago.  I like his comments on THIS game, but not ancient history.

      Posted by Fleety on 2006 11 24 at 12:44 AM • permalink


    1. #103 Did you hear the ripping commentary Kerry O’Keefe had going earlier about Yousif Khan’s conversion from Christianity to Islam? Since changing his name to Mohammed Yousuf and becoming a muslim his batting avge. has doubled.

      Kerry then went on to say that Cat Stevens similar move to becoming Yusuf Islam and muslim hadn’t been quite so successful!

      Posted by Infidel Tiger on 2006 11 24 at 12:45 AM • permalink


    1. #106: It’s because now he no longer has to fear his own team mates and can concentrate on the opposition.

      Posted by Fleety on 2006 11 24 at 12:55 AM • permalink


    1. # 107: Being a Christian in the Pakistani team would be like being a non-drinker in the Australian team.

      Posted by Infidel Tiger on 2006 11 24 at 01:00 AM • permalink


    1. #108, Infidel:  Indeed, or to refine it just a little.  Being a christian in the Pakistani team would be like being a non-beer drinker in the Aussie team.
      Hence, McGill is shunned by the team and selectors.  He’s a shiraz man.

      Posted by Fleety on 2006 11 24 at 01:11 AM • permalink


    1. Warnie had his own wine label at one stage. Something tells me he’s more of a Midori and lemonade fan, though.

      Posted by Infidel Tiger on 2006 11 24 at 01:17 AM • permalink


    1. 602.  That’s not bad.

      Posted by Stop Continental Drift! on 2006 11 24 at 02:22 AM • permalink


    1. Well we’ll maybe able to better judge that perhaps when we see what England are able to amass….

      But there now 2 down and hopefully the pitch will get a few more cracks in it etc….

      Starting to look good…

      While McGrath has a problem with his mouth, if only some of our young crop of bowlers could be half as professional, accurate and consistent in terms of their bowling as McGrath is…  You can’t fault him on the effort he puts in and he has the results to show for it….

      Posted by casanova on 2006 11 24 at 02:41 AM • permalink


    1. The ABC’s Kerry O Keefe had me in stitches with his comments about Mohammed Yusuf, the Pakistani player who converted to Islam. He reckons Cat Stevens, now Yousuf Islam or something, went downhill after he found Allah.
      Aggers etc. were gobbling like turkeys trying to think of something politically correct to say, all the while “Skull” O’Keefe is cackling like a loon.

      love cricket commentary on the radio.

      Posted by Pedro the Ignorant on 2006 11 24 at 07:21 AM • permalink


    1. As its well past stumps on day two with the dodgy POME B@stards at 3/53 chasing 602, I shall say thus:

      #44, SCD, Just ask them why the ABC PO Box in every state is numbered 9994.  Even the lefty scum at JJJ dont know that answer these days…

      And I shall recall the day at the WACA, whence I saw two blokes with matching t-shirts, one of which said “Gilly is a shit-hot batter” the other said “Langer is a hard bastard”.

      This is of course the week after the pair had pounded the Pakies into submision in Hobart.

      My favorite memory at the WACA is McGraths hat trick vs the WIndies.  Honestly, after the second wicket (I recall it was the captain, but not if it was Lara or Adams at the time) I thought the crowd could get no louder.

      I was wrong.  To this day, I’m still not sure how less than 30,000 people made that much noise…

      Posted by The_Wizard_of_WOZ on 2006 11 24 at 01:08 PM • permalink


    1. #108, “BOONEY ARMY!, BOONEY ARMY!

      Honestly, if anyone out there has even put away 40 cans (as if they’d even let you try in this day and age) on the plane from Sydney to London, I’d love to hear about it…

      Just remeber folks, thats 52 cans of VB, at 1.4 ‘standards drinks’ per can (last time I checked) i.e. 73 shots of spirits, or thereabouts.  Although the plane had to stop somewhere in Asia for more avgas (and prolly VB tins too) back in those days…

      Posted by The_Wizard_of_WOZ on 2006 11 24 at 01:16 PM • permalink


    1. 114, I was there and it was loud.  3 good batsmen too.

      I did have tickets to the Ashes in UK in 2000/2001, but sprained/broke/tore my ankle and couldnt go.

      This hat trick kinda made up for it.

      Posted by Fleety on 2006 11 24 at 06:10 PM • permalink


    1. #68 pommygranate – Chalk is about a block away from the Gabba. LH side of Stanley Street inbound. Opposite the busway. Can’t miss it; it’s a huge three storey place. I’ve probably written this way too late, but y’know, I’ve been at work. 4:30pm – 3:30am shifts. It’s lots of fun, but gee I’m exhausted..

      Posted by Fiona on 2006 11 25 at 12:17 AM • permalink


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