Lone star

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Last updated on August 9th, 2017 at 03:54 pm

Texan John Caffery takes a stand.

UPDATE. Mr Caffery’s yard is too far for Saskatoon residents to travel, so the local library is helping out:

Saskatoon residents wishing to find out what all the fuss was about surrounding the publication of caricatures of the Prophet Muhammad can visit the Main Branch of the Saskatoon Public Library.

The latest issue of the Western Standard news magazine which contains some of the cartoons is being made available to readers.

UPDATE II. Mick-mocking film director Kevin Smith is no John Caffery:

There’s another kind of film Smith doesn’t plan on making anytime soon — one about religion. Smith said he’d love to do a “Dogma 2,” but you can’t do that without talking about Islam these days, “and after watching what happened with the cartoons, I want to say nothing about Muhammad except that’s he’s really cool guy … And I don’t have a picture or drawing of him.”

UPDATE III. Comment of the year, thus far.

Posted by Tim B. on 03/01/2006 at 03:18 AM
    1. Waal, therrre y’go, as McLeod would have said.

      Posted by Rafe on 2006 03 01 at 03:40 AM • permalink


    1. No photo accompanying the article? How remiss of them.

      Posted by Mr Snuffalupagus on 2006 03 01 at 03:47 AM • permalink


    1. Don’t mess with Texas.

      Remember the Alamo? Who’s mowing our lawns now?

      Posted by Oafish and Infantile on 2006 03 01 at 03:52 AM • permalink


    1. Good on him, Arrr.

      Fight the good fight, me hearties!

      Posted by hkstar on 2006 03 01 at 03:54 AM • permalink


    1. A real local hero.  Well done.

      Posted by Howzat on 2006 03 01 at 04:09 AM • permalink


    1. I guess if all these crackpots flip their wigs and are driven to a frenzy of religious indignation, Mr Caffery seems like he has had a decent innings seeing he is approaching 70….

      Lets just hope he and his neighbours have a few high powered weapons, and perhaps a doberman or two so that the first muslie who steps foot on his property or comes looking for trouble gets taught a few manners as well as what it means to live in a democracy….

      and if a few bleeding heart libs come down to protest any offense being caused they can get the same treatment too….  not that i think Texas is over endowed with hand wringers from what i hear about the place…

      Posted by casanova on 2006 03 01 at 04:37 AM • permalink


    1. If he carries on like this he’ll have a brokeback and be mounted on the New York Times newsdesk.

      Mind you they are the bastion of freedom of expression…….they’ve dug a moat around their offices.

      Official policy is that no article with the letters I-S-L-A-M may be accompanied by a cartoon as this may occasion a Jihad.

      As may ….coughing while using your phone, eating eggs while reading a newspaper, walking your dog while smoking……

      Posted by Mike 101 on 2006 03 01 at 04:54 AM • permalink


    1. He’ll now face a full frontal assault by Jihadi Shock Troops of the ACLU staging their insurgency with IEDs through the US Court system

      Posted by Voyager on 2006 03 01 at 04:57 AM • permalink


    1. Obviously John Caffrey is not a member of the supine International Federation of Journalists.  He still has a spine and common sense.

      Posted by platey mates on 2006 03 01 at 06:17 AM • permalink


    1. A Beaumont city planning official says the billboard doesn’t violate any ordinances.

      I love the Beaumont city. You are a beaut, you Beaumonters! Good on you!

      Posted by tmciolek on 2006 03 01 at 07:18 AM • permalink


    1. To the town of Beaumont, Texas
      Came a stranger one fine day
      Riding slowly from the west side
      Didn’t have too much to say
      He’s a stranger who’s been running
      Came the whisper from each lip
      And he’s here to do some business
      With that Big Iron on his hip
      Big Iron on his hip

      In the town lived one Jihadi
      Who sold cigareets and gas
      Al-Bayed would talk about how he’d
      Soon kick some Texas ass
      Tho’ he swore that he’d behead ‘em
      So far his jihad had been strange
      20 men bought cheap gas and smokes
      20 men had been shortchanged
      20 men had been shortchanged

      It wasn’t long before the stranger
      Made it known to folks around
      He was a Texas Ranger
      Wouldn’t be too long in Town
      Here to capture a cheap conman
      Maybe live or maybe dead
      It didn’t really matter
      He was after Al-Bayed

      It was early at the Truck Stop
      When they met to make their play
      And the swiftness of the Ranger
      Is still talked about today
      Al-Bayed whipped out a scimitar
      and flailed it round his head
      The Ranger drew his .45
      and shot that rascal dead
      He shot that rascal dead

      It was kinda like that scene
      From “Indiana Jones”
      Where ol’ Indy shoots the Swordsman
      “Dipshit, just leave me alone”
      Al-Bayed might have gone on living
      til he made one fatal slip
      When he tried to match the Ranger
      With the Big Iron on his hip
      Big Iron on his hip

      So Jihadi’s pay attention
      When you’re planning your Jihad
      Your silliness plays better
      Where the local folks ain’t bad
      If you want to throw a hoohaw
      It might play in Boston, Mass
      If you try to mess with Texas
      They will kill your ragged ass
      They will kill your ragged ass

      God Bless Texas.

      Posted by Carl H on 2006 03 01 at 07:25 AM • permalink


    1. #11 Carl H – one of the funniest things today. I dip my lid to y’all.

      Humbly yours…

      Posted by Black Chick on 2006 03 01 at 07:37 AM • permalink


    1. #11
      Wonderful &  cheerful.  Thank you for both.

      Posted by tmciolek on 2006 03 01 at 08:10 AM • permalink


    1. Kevin Smith gained a lot of respect from me when he joined a group protesting “Dogma”—they didn’t recognize him, and showed just how little they actually knew about the film they were protesting.

      But now? He’s just another coward, perfectly willing to take on people who truly follow a peaceful path, but running scared when his own hide is on the line.

      Posted by Rob Crawford on 2006 03 01 at 10:36 AM • permalink


    1. Moslem riots in Texas is kind of the definition of a self-correcting problem…

      Posted by richard mcenroe on 2006 03 01 at 11:06 AM • permalink


    1. Kevin Smith is a hack, that has been well established. Now he’s a hack and a coward.

      Posted by Attmay on 2006 03 01 at 11:21 AM • permalink


    1. HOLY CRAP.

      I live in Beaumont.

      Posted by david on 2006 03 01 at 12:03 PM • permalink


    1. Pure poetry, Carl H. And #15, Rich, LMAO.
      In defense of Kevin Smith – at least he is upfront about it. Not hiding behind pious platitudes about respect for religion.

      Posted by Latino on 2006 03 01 at 12:14 PM • permalink


    1. #11, I laughed till I cried.  God bless Texans, I say.

      Posted by RebeccaH on 2006 03 01 at 12:47 PM • permalink


    1. Well, I had typed a nice long post about how I couldn’t see any sign when I drove past the guy’s house, but it looks like I had the wrong address.

      Beaumont Enterprise article

      I’m gonna try and go past there later today to grab a pic or two…

      Posted by david on 2006 03 01 at 12:49 PM • permalink


    1. But now? He’s just another coward,

      Oh please. Is it just possible that Silent Bob himself was making a joke? He himself is (presumably a liberal) Catholic, hence his desire to make Dogma.

      My guess is he has no desire to make another religious movie, and just made a crack about Islam, not that he’s secretly burning with desire to direct Dogma 2: Mohammad Kicks Ass. Not everything has to be viewed through the prism of Clash of Civilisations.


      Posted by Paul Moloney on 2006 03 01 at 01:07 PM • permalink


    1. I think Kevin made an ironic slam. “I won’t mock Islam cuz they might kill me” translates as “They’re batshit crazy fuckers.”

      Posted by Dave S. on 2006 03 01 at 01:58 PM • permalink


    1. Brilliant, Carl H!

      Yeah, well, Penn& Teller had an ep of their show, Bullshit! devoted to debunking the Bible.  How fearless.  I ain’t seen them take aim at the Quran yet…

      Posted by ushie on 2006 03 01 at 02:48 PM • permalink


    1. Pics!

      (Well, one at least.)


      Phone number and e-mail blurred out; both available to anyone interested.

      Posted by david on 2006 03 01 at 04:13 PM • permalink


    1. I think Kevin made an ironic slam. “I won’t mock Islam cuz they might kill me” translates as “They’re batshit crazy fuckers.”

      It’s still capitulation. It’s giving them what they want.

      Posted by Rob Crawford on 2006 03 01 at 05:05 PM • permalink


    1. Funny – I have not heard Big Iron for some time. And the best part is that the motto of the Texas Rangers?

      One Riot, One Ranger.

      Send a few of them to sort things out.

      Posted by bill w on 2006 03 01 at 11:24 PM • permalink


    1. Dogma was a pretty lame movie but it did feature Alannis Morissette in a role where she had not one word of dialogue, and you got to see Matt Damon’s* head explode, so it wasn’t a total loss.

      *Or was it Ben Affleck’s head? Well, it was one or the other.

      Posted by Andrea Harris, Administrator on 2006 03 01 at 11:34 PM • permalink


    1. “and after watching what happened with the cartoons, I want to say nothing about Muhammad except that’s he’s really cool guy … And I don’t have a picture or drawing of him.”

      Replace ‘the cartoons’ with Die Jude and ‘Muhammed’ with Hitler, and you have the German streets in the 30s.

      And they say history doesn’t repeat?

      Posted by Barrie on 2006 03 01 at 11:51 PM • permalink


    1. Casanova,
      A high-powered rifle?  It’s Texas fercryinoutloud.  A rifle goes without saying (except in Austin).  It wouldn’t surprise me if he had a machine gun or two.

      Posted by Michael Lonie on 2006 03 02 at 12:30 AM • permalink


    1. Carl H – a fellow Texan hat-tip to your song – God bless Texas indeed.

      Posted by Sharon_Ferguson on 2006 03 02 at 12:57 AM • permalink


    1. It’s still capitulation. It’s giving them what they want.

      So Rob, what anti-Islamic movies have you made lately? Or have you capitulated too?


      Posted by Paul Moloney on 2006 03 02 at 06:00 AM • permalink


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