Iran breakthrough!

Last updated on August 10th, 2017 at 10:59 am

John Howard, speaking on March 10, about the UN’s Iran tactics:

“People who are critical of George Bush, and myself and Tony Blair and others because we didn’t keep endlessly going back to the United Nations in 2003 now have an opportunity to see how effectively the United Nations will work.”

Well, egg on your face, Mister Prime Minister! Turns out the UN is working very effectively indeed:

UN body allows Iran to export caviar

Admittedly, on that other pressing Iranian issue—something to do with nukes, I think—progress hasn’t been as swift:

Envoys from the five permanent United Nations Security Council members plus Germany discussed sanctions against Iran over its nuclear program but failed to agree.

1. ‘… but failed to agree’ is redundant information and is assumed.

   Posted by Stevo on 2006 04 19 at 01:54 PM • permalink

1. UN body allows Iran to export caviar.

   Have we gone from nanny states to the nanny globe?

   Posted by yojimbo on 2006 04 19 at 02:16 PM • permalink

1. NO OIL FOR FISH EGGS!!!!!!

   Posted by The_Real_JeffS on 2006 04 19 at 02:38 PM • permalink

1. Caviar, the ‘other black gold.’

   Posted by Achillea on 2006 04 19 at 02:38 PM • permalink

1. Mayhaps that should be:

   NO BLOOD FOR FISH EGGS!!!!!!!!

   Posted by The_Real_JeffS on 2006 04 19 at 02:39 PM • permalink

1. There is some historical reason why the UN gets to have a say over whether or not Iran exports caviar, there has to be, but I cannot for the life of me remember it, and probably wouldn’t understand or approve of it if I could.  What the FUCK makes it their job to “allow” any country to export anything?
   Personally I’d like to see Iran exporting lots and lots of stuff, and not just crude oil, caviar, pistachios, and rugs.  It would be okay with me if Iran built some goddamn refineries, too, and could sell higher-value petroleum products.  Appeaserly weasel that I am, I’d like to see Iran have lots and lots of customers, and suppliers, in lots and lots of foreign countries.  In fact, the less Iran’s foreign trade situation comes to resemble, say, North Korea’s trade situation, the better I’ll like it.
   And y’all should NOT need Mr Waterton to explain to you why that situation would be desirable, from a world-prosperity AND a world-peace perspective.  But if push comes to shove, he would be the guy to ask.

   Posted by Stoop Davy Dave on 2006 04 19 at 02:46 PM • permalink

1. What, you want UN cocktail receptions to suffer from a lack of Sevruga? Are you people totally without humanity??

   Posted by rick mcginnis on 2006 04 19 at 03:29 PM • permalink

1. SDD

   you’ve just proved you have a low capacity for having nutjobs run an economy and a country (and a relegion).  Not that I blame you.

   Posted by scatcat on 2006 04 19 at 03:30 PM • permalink

1. Nutjobs running an economy and a country is inversely proportional to the success of the economy and the freedom of the country… or something like that… you guys know what I mean.  It’s been a long day and I’m a tired old man. 😉  bye

   Posted by Franklin on 2006 04 19 at 04:45 PM • permalink

1. Next they will write a letter saying that Iran has to behave or they will get “vewwy, vewwy annoyed”.

   Posted by blogstrop on 2006 04 19 at 05:16 PM • permalink

1. #6

   I think that the UN imposed certain economic or trade sanctions on Iran. Letting them then export caviar is proof of the UN’s firm resolve on this issue.

   Posted by Ian Deans on 2006 04 19 at 05:22 PM • permalink

1. What have you got against caviar, you Macdonalds munching inverted snob?!

   Posted by Rafe on 2006 04 19 at 05:56 PM • permalink

1. There is Sturgeon’s Revelation: “Ninety percent of everything is crud.”

   Posted by MentalFloss on 2006 04 19 at 06:06 PM • permalink

1. The UN has in reserve their harshest retaliation against a hostile and nuclear-armed Iran: UN to Iran: your caviar tastes like shit! Catastrophe avoided.

   Posted by Henry boy on 2006 04 19 at 06:23 PM • permalink

1. But the UN remains “seized of the matter”!

   Posted by allan on 2006 04 19 at 07:37 PM • permalink

1. Yellow cake with your caviar sir?

   Posted by Wolfbane on 2006 04 19 at 07:53 PM • permalink

1. Well there ya go John. If only you and George ate more caviar then you would have been more au fait with what was going on with the UN. They slipped that one by you.

   Posted by Spag_oz on 2006 04 19 at 08:19 PM • permalink

1. Dear me.  Is the UN going to frown harshly in the general direction of Iran?  However will they withstand that?

   Posted by RebeccaH on 2006 04 19 at 09:14 PM • permalink

1. #18: and god help them all if Kofi becomes deeply troubled.

   Posted by Henry boy on 2006 04 19 at 09:43 PM • permalink

1. The only way this thing is going to be resolved is:

   (a) sancations as tight as a fish’s behind (which is near impossible); or
   (b) a tactical air strike by Israel or the US.

   If option (b) is chosen lets get it done before the targets get more hardened.

   Posted by lingus4 on 2006 04 19 at 10:15 PM • permalink

1. Whew!  I’m so glad they finally got that straightened out.  I was afraid that the problems involved with Iran’s exportation of caviar would cause serious instability in the world.  Let’s hear it for the UN!  Once again they’ve proven their diplomatic acumen.

   Posted by saltydog on 2006 04 19 at 10:47 PM • permalink

1. Fish laid
   Ahmedinajad played.

   Posted by Dan Lewis on 2006 04 19 at 10:47 PM • permalink

1. I think I’ve got this.

   It’s an UN matter because the Caspian sturgeon is an endangered species and the export of caviar is international trade in same.

   None of the five nations sharing the Caspian Sea provided information necessary to assess the status of the resource.

   So of the five nations only Iran is allowed to export caviar because it’s the only one facing UN sanctions and in utter contempt of UN resolutions.

   None of the five nations could give a bucket of beluga balls for what some Geneva-based UN body says or does anyway.

   International law? Piece of piss once you get the hang of it.

   Posted by geoff on 2006 04 19 at 11:12 PM • permalink

1. Sturgeon on the Ridiculous. [Legal Maxim]

   Posted by geoff on 2006 04 19 at 11:32 PM • permalink

1. Caviar comes from the virgin sturgeon … more highly prized are 24 virgin sturgeon waiting in heaven …

   Posted by Stevo on 2006 04 20 at 02:33 AM • permalink

1. So it’s sturgeon virgin on the ridiculous?

   Sorry Stevo. You’re going to need the International Court of Justice to stamp that one. There’s about a dozen virgins for a start.

   Posted by geoff on 2006 04 20 at 03:27 AM • permalink

1. Admittedly, on that other pressing Iranian issue—something to do with nukes, I think—progress hasn’t been as swift:

   Patience Tim. Just give the U.N. a bit of time . They’ll come good. Don’t they always?

   Posted by gubbaboy on 2006 04 20 at 04:51 AM • permalink

1. Microwaved (NUKED) Caviar YUM!

   Posted by Howzat on 2006 04 20 at 05:22 AM • permalink

1. Thought provoking http://www.jimball.com.au/

   Posted by Howzat on 2006 04 20 at 07:12 AM • permalink

1. #25
   Caviar comes from the virgin sturgeon
   The virgin sturgeon is a very fine fish
   The virgin sturgeon needs no urgin’
   That’s why caviar is my dish

   Posted by Whale Spinor on 2006 04 20 at 08:53 AM • permalink

1. 23 Geoff

   It’s an UN matter because the Caspian sturgeon is an endangered species and the export of caviar is international trade in same.

   wait wait wait … Sturgeon are endangered and that’s a reason NOT to export caviar???
   How stupid is that?
   The classic encapsulation of this reasoning is a PETA twit holding a sign: “Save a cow’s life!  Boycott milk!”  Nobody had ever explained to this twit what becomes of unemployed cows.  Unemployed sturgeon have the same problem; no humans have any incentive to sustain a viable sturgeon population.
   This reminds me of the UN’s equally-brillian ban on ivory, but that’s another rant for another time.

   Posted by Stoop Davy Dave on 2006 04 20 at 11:06 AM • permalink

1. #18, I don’t think they have reached the frowning stage yet, unless they have already passed the ‘alarmed’stage.

   Posted by darrinh on 2006 04 20 at 11:59 PM • permalink

1. All your caviar are belong to us.

   Posted by crash on 2006 04 23 at 09:41 AM • permalink

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