Immigrant pitied

Last updated on August 4th, 2017 at 01:24 pm

In the spirit of full transparency, here’s an email chat between myself and Crikey editor (and ex-Age content provider) Jonathan Green:

Tim: If Irfan Yusuf or anyone at Crikey had bothered to contact me prior to publishing Irfan’s ridiculous complaint about running a press release without the author’s permission (!), I’d have been happy to forward a copy of the press release as sent to the Telegraph(contrary to Irfan’s claims). You people are hopeless.

Green: I think his point was rather that your commitment to sourcing the best in original written opinion goes no further than the re-publishing of press releases. You people are hacks.

Tim: If that was Irfans’s point, mate, why didn’t he say it more directly? I suppose because it’s completely untrue; our “commitment to sourcing the best in original written opinion” obviously goes further than simply publishing press releases.

Green: Dunno. Guess it’s some sort of ESL [English as a second language – ed] thing.

Irfan arrived in Australia about 38 years and 120 kilograms ago; he was just five months old at the time, and has since acquainted himself well enough with English to become a practicing lawyer. Whatever his faults, they can’t be excused by any struggle to overcome a language barrier.

Crikey obviously assumes that correspondents with non-Anglo names – like our pal Irfan – are a baffled breed of recent arrivals, bravely composing their missives with the help of “Say it in English” guidebooks and any native speakers nearby in the ‘Net cafe. Use this to your advantage; if you seek an audience for inaccurate, ill-researched theories, simply send them to Crikey using the name “Jurgen”, “Shalooba”, “Tløt”, or “Oonki”. They won’t check your claims, and they’ll believe any subsequent dispute arises from a misinterpretation of your barely-intelligible semi-English patois.

Whatever. At least Crikey has since run this correction:

In an item published Friday, Crikey claimed that Sydney’s Daily Telegraph had published an opinion article it had lifted from a website. In fact, the article – in the form of a press release – had been sent to the paper. Crikey also used the phrase “almost plagiarism”, which was inaccurate. The piece ran under the author’s name.

UPDATE. Confused and angry English-learner Paco writes:

Estimado Señor Blair:

Maldito sea! I am sending many comments to your – how you say?, -“blog”, and I doan believe I ever give you the permiso, no? Yet you publish. Why is this? I write and send comments – ay! So many, many comments – but I never say, “Hey, Tim Blair, you want show this to the world, is ok with me, compadre.” You maybe take advantage of my bad English, yes? You know, this doan happen in Cuba. The peoples write comments there, they doan have to worry about them being published.

Anyways, I got my eyes on you, Tim Blair, so ten cuidado!

You friend,

Paco

I think his point is rather that my commitment to sourcing the best in original written opinion goes no further than the re-publishing of excellent blog comments. Although it may be some sort of ESL thing.

Posted by Tim B. on 07/16/2007 at 11:07 AM
    1. My hover-craft is full of eels!

      Posted by andycanuck on 2007 07 16 at 11:28 AM • permalink

 

    1. Ouch. Zing.

      Posted by aaron_ on 2007 07 16 at 11:32 AM • permalink

 

    1. Fingernails must still be sore over there at Crikey from the pressure to print even that much.

      Posted by Clubbeaux on 2007 07 16 at 11:34 AM • permalink

 

    1. “I will not buy this tobacconist, it is scratched.”

      Posted by Major John on 2007 07 16 at 11:47 AM • permalink

 

    1. The best made-up names have a bushman click in them, eg. N!ai or Hei//om.  Serbo-Croatian is good if your diacritical keys work ; these are especially useful in dedications.

      Mixing nationalities is always effective.

      Nquir Crabbe-Jones

      Posted by rhhardin on 2007 07 16 at 11:47 AM • permalink

 

    1. Poor Crikey. These days it’s like shooting fish in a barrel. Almost as much fun as occasionally sighting MargoK in the mud of her puddle.

      Posted by mareeS on 2007 07 16 at 11:47 AM • permalink

 

    1. The hectare, very good completes, gentleman.

      Posted by Grimmy on 2007 07 16 at 11:49 AM • permalink

 

    1. My bottom explodes with delight!

      Posted by murph on 2007 07 16 at 11:51 AM • permalink

 

    1. whoops!

      that should be:-

      “My nipples explode with delight!”

      Somebody call the hack police at Crikey! !!!

      Posted by murph on 2007 07 16 at 11:53 AM • permalink

 

    1. ‘Tim: If that was Irfans’s point, mate, why didn’t he say it more directly?’

      ‘…Green: Dunno. Guess it’s some sort of ESL [English as a second language – ed] thing.’

      So…you’re admitting that you print articles by people who haven’t mastered the English language enough to get their points across?

      You should hire my one year old grandson to write op/ed pieces then.  He’s at least as incoherent as your boy, Irfan.

      Posted by Dave Surls on 2007 07 16 at 11:54 AM • permalink

 

    1. My brother & I were wondering how they accomplish spelling bees in pictographic or clicking languages. Maybe they have a technical as well as artistic merit grade?

      Posted by bovious on 2007 07 16 at 11:55 AM • permalink

 

    1. Estimado Señor Blair:

      Maldito sea! I am sending many comments to your – how you say?, -“blog”, and I doan believe I ever give you the permiso, no? Yet you publish. Why is this? I write and send comments – ay! So many, many comments – but I never say, “Hey, Tim Blair, you want show this to the world, is ok with me, compadre.”  You maybe take advantage of my bad English, yes?  You know, this doan happen in Cuba. The peoples write comments there, they doan have to worry about them being published.

      Anyways, I got my eyes on you, Tim Blair, so ten cuidado!

      You friend,

      Paco

      Posted by paco on 2007 07 16 at 11:56 AM • permalink

 

    1. Tim

      You have my full support if you want to do a “Glenn Milne” and tap dance on Jonathan Green’s head.

      Posted by murph on 2007 07 16 at 11:57 AM • permalink

 

    1. All your satire are belong to us.

      Posted by joe bagadonuts on 2007 07 16 at 11:58 AM • permalink

 

    1. “In an item published Friday, Crikey claimed that Sydney’s Daily Telegraph had published an opinion article it had lifted from a website. In fact, the article – in the form of a press release – had been sent to the paper. Crikey also used the phrase “almost plagiarism”, which was inaccurate. The piece ran under the author’s name.”

      Looks like Crikey also has an ESL issue…

      Translation (from Leftoidese to English):

      We lied.  We got caught.

      Posted by Dave Surls on 2007 07 16 at 12:03 PM • permalink

 

    1. You people are hacks.

      People who live in glass houses…

      Posted by RebeccaH on 2007 07 16 at 12:13 PM • permalink

 

    1. #16, RebeccaH:

      … go through lots of window cleaning fluid?

      Posted by Grimmy on 2007 07 16 at 12:16 PM • permalink

 

    1. #15: Crikey also used the phrase “almost plagiarism”, which was inaccurate.

      Even the lie is weaselish. Why “almost” plagiarism?

      Posted by paco on 2007 07 16 at 12:17 PM • permalink

 

    1. Just read Irfan’s bio.  Apparently he ran on a Liberal Party ticket against Laurie Ferguson in the 2001 election.

      Posted by murph on 2007 07 16 at 12:17 PM • permalink

 

    1. How boorish of Crikey to assume someone who doesn’t have an anglo name cant speak English.  Just boorish.  Typical of the leftoid arrogance.  Could one even call it xenophobic?  No, the left have no phobias. To call them xenophobic would be paramount to calling them hypocrites.  (i could go on but i will restrain myself – for now 😀 )

      Posted by missred on 2007 07 16 at 12:30 PM • permalink

 

    1. what would you call someone who’s phobic about xenophobics?

      Posted by Grimmy on 2007 07 16 at 12:31 PM • permalink

 

    1. #21 A lefty?

      Posted by ThinAndBritish on 2007 07 16 at 12:39 PM • permalink

 

    1. All right, I’m fighting the good conservative fight in Occupied Northern Virginia, and what happens? Karl Marx makes a daring raid into Richmond.

      Posted by paco on 2007 07 16 at 12:46 PM • permalink

 

    1. I wish to know perfectly where lives the station of pissing?

      Posted by Harry Bergeron on 2007 07 16 at 12:47 PM • permalink

 

    1. #9 murph

      My hovercraft is full of eels!

      Posted by Spiny Norman on 2007 07 16 at 12:48 PM • permalink

 

    1. Okay, perhaps my statement that the writers at Crikey are obese pederasts in sorry need of personal hygene is inaccurate.

      Posted by wronwright on 2007 07 16 at 12:56 PM • permalink

 

    1. Paco,

      I’ve been glad the kids survived their nutty teachers. The son arrived home tonight from a boat delivery frozen to the bone after six days at sea, ran into his fourth-form master at the marina pub. Teacher asked why he hadn’t pursued university. Son said: Because you’re a teacher and I’m a sailor. Spot the difference.

      Posted by mareeS on 2007 07 16 at 01:08 PM • permalink

 

    1. Tên tối lá Jack.  Tối lá người Ca na da nhủng tối cũng người Úc.

      Posted by Jack from Montreal on 2007 07 16 at 01:19 PM • permalink

 

    1. #26: Okay, perhaps my statement that the writers at Crikey are obese pederasts in sorry need of personal hygene is inaccurate.

      I’ll say. There’s no evidence at all that any of them are writers.

      Posted by paco on 2007 07 16 at 01:19 PM • permalink

 

    1. For the few of you who don’t speak Vietnamese, Úc means Australia.  It’s pronounced loke a very startled Oops, without the “s”.

      Posted by Jack from Montreal on 2007 07 16 at 01:23 PM • permalink

 

    1. #28: Hey, I think I did a bit on General Giap’s boxer shorts one time, and they sounded just like that.

      Posted by paco on 2007 07 16 at 01:23 PM • permalink

 

    1. Make that ..”  like…”

      Perview is my fiend

      Posted by Jack from Montreal on 2007 07 16 at 01:25 PM • permalink

 

    1. Assuming a person has an ESL issue based on their nationality…..isn’t that, I dunno, racist?  Nationalist?

      Naw……leftist!  Which, these days, is semantically equal to “stupid”.

      Posted by The_Real_JeffS on 2007 07 16 at 01:28 PM • permalink

 

    1. “Even the lie is weaselish. Why “almost” plagiarism?”

      Because lawyer-boy is just smart enough not to give Mr. Blair grounds for a libel suit.

      Posted by Dave Surls on 2007 07 16 at 01:30 PM • permalink

 

    1. I’m terrified of birth.

      Hopefully, they’ll teach me something.

      Posted by Ash_ on 2007 07 16 at 01:32 PM • permalink

 

    1. Italics off

      Posted by The_Real_JeffS on 2007 07 16 at 01:39 PM • permalink

 

    1. </i> make them stop!

      Posted by Mr. Bingley on 2007 07 16 at 01:39 PM • permalink

 

    1. I’[/l] probably suspect it may be a cheat… or not.

      Posted by Ash_ on 2007 07 16 at 01:40 PM • permalink

 

    1. Oopsie!!

      Posted by The_Real_JeffS on 2007 07 16 at 01:40 PM • permalink

 

    1. JeffS, it must be one of those Italicans in the throes of ESL who is causing the problem…

      Posted by Mr. Bingley on 2007 07 16 at 01:40 PM • permalink

 

    1. I guess those italics have an ESL issue as well, eh?  Damn Italicans!

      Posted by The_Real_JeffS on 2007 07 16 at 01:40 PM • permalink

 

    1. #30, Jack, Aussie boys who were in Vietnam remember “Uc da loi cheap charlie” and the little song that went with it that the girls used to sing (ask my husband and the boys). “He cheap charlie, he no pay…”

      Also di di mau. Which they did quick smart. Those words saved lots of lives.

      Cheers, maree

      Also, “Two arms, two hands, Two steely bands, Under the Southern Cross we stand”

      The rest is unrepeatable in polite company.

      Posted by mareeS on 2007 07 16 at 01:41 PM • permalink

 

    1. you scare me

      Posted by Mr. Bingley on 2007 07 16 at 01:41 PM • permalink

 

    1. Andrea? Have I ever mentioned how us ladies love you, and you just seem to do be better with each passing second?

      Posted by Ash_ on 2007 07 16 at 01:41 PM • permalink

 

    1. We think alike, Mr. Bingley.  That should scare anyone.

      Posted by The_Real_JeffS on 2007 07 16 at 01:44 PM • permalink

 

    1. #45 It should, but where are the girls with the pepper sauce?!

      Posted by Ash_ on 2007 07 16 at 01:46 PM • permalink

 

    1. The Italicans took ‘em out to an early lunch.  Probably to a Mexican resturant, the Italican cusine consisting primarily of Chilean sea bass.

      Posted by The_Real_JeffS on 2007 07 16 at 01:50 PM • permalink

 

    1. I’m strugging. Someone, please, help me. How can someone arrive at 5 months years, and not understand English?

      I arrived at 11 months, and I seem to do ok, most days…

      Posted by Ash_ on 2007 07 16 at 01:51 PM • permalink

 

    1. #48 Oh, and feel free to make fun of my English. It ain’t great, but I have to learn somehow.

      Posted by Ash_ on 2007 07 16 at 01:52 PM • permalink

 

    1. #47: Hey, whatzamatta fo’ you? The Italican cuisine, she is-a delicious. We doan need-a da sea bass, we gotta da pasta and da pizza.

      Posted by paco on 2007 07 16 at 01:55 PM • permalink

 

    1. #50 Now, Paco, if you’re gonna get all Eyetalian on me, be warned. I lived there till I was 11…

      Posted by Ash_ on 2007 07 16 at 01:58 PM • permalink

 

    1. #51: No, I’d better not. I’m having a tough enough time faking hispanic.

      Posted by paco on 2007 07 16 at 02:07 PM • permalink

 

    1. Eye-talians have an excellent cuisine, paco.  The ItaliCANs do not.  As a culture, their only redeeming feature is that they all lean right.

      Posted by The_Real_JeffS on 2007 07 16 at 02:11 PM • permalink

 

    1. #51 LOL Paco. Paco is pronounced Paco.

      We have great food!

      Posted by Ash_ on 2007 07 16 at 02:13 PM • permalink

 

    1. #53 As a culture, their only redeeming feature is that they all lean right.

      Very true, RJ. Say, does italicized Arabic lean left?

      Posted by paco on 2007 07 16 at 02:21 PM • permalink

 

    1. #53 Um, yeah, usually, it does.

      But I’m having trouble with believing some bands these days. Some have some “Live Earth” crap.

      Posted by Ash_ on 2007 07 16 at 02:29 PM • permalink

 

    1. Puce wept.

      Posted by Jim Treacher on 2007 07 16 at 02:30 PM • permalink

 

    1. Mauve was curiously unmoved.

      Posted by SSG Pooh on 2007 07 16 at 02:38 PM • permalink

 

    1. #57 Jim: Did you ever figure out what Puce was actually trying to say? I remember reading one or two comments, and they were so sublimely incoherent (to me, at any rate) that they were hilarious in and of themselves.

      Posted by paco on 2007 07 16 at 02:40 PM • permalink

 

    1. #59 Uh, I remember something about seeing a psychiatrist, but not much more than that. Sorry Paco.

      Posted by Ash_ on 2007 07 16 at 02:56 PM • permalink

 

    1. As to ESL I only am in this country a short distance…

      Off thread, but with reference to the recent movie car meme, here’s an updated General Lee to cheer about.  Them Duke boys never had it so good.  (Here goes my first attempt at linky thingees.  Hope it works.):

      http://www.michaelyon-online.com/wp/superman/htm

      Posted by SSG Pooh on 2007 07 16 at 03:04 PM • permalink

 

    1. #23:  Now you know why I live south of the “Rivah” in Chesterfield.  All my kin do as well, except for the brother who lives in Henrico.  Well out of Richmond’s purview.

      Elizabeth
      Imperial Keeper

      Posted by Elizabeth Imperial Keeper on 2007 07 16 at 03:16 PM • permalink

 

    1. Mixing nationalities is always effective.

      Nquir Crabbe-Jones

      Rhardin—hell, we get that in the States all the time, when Eufula Washington drops her ‘slave name’ for ‘Chlamydia Shabazz X’…

      Posted by richard mcenroe on 2007 07 16 at 03:20 PM • permalink

 

    1. Richard?

      Hungry?!

      Posted by Ash_ on 2007 07 16 at 03:21 PM • permalink

 

    1. #53 The_Real_JeffS –

      Eye-talians have an excellent cuisine, paco.  The ItaliCANs do not.

      Although I am not a member of the noble race of people called ItaliCANS, I take it upon myself to claim RACISM by you.  You and your jack booted cohorts in the VRWC must make amends by contributing vast sums of cash to my fund of racial reconciliation called the “Jesse Sharpton King Jr. Stomp Out Racism Against ItaliCANS NOW! Fund”.  If you should make a blatantly racist decision to not contribute to my worthy fund, we will make paper mache puppets and protest you from an empty lot of land half a mile away.

      You will be sorry.

      Posted by wronwright on 2007 07 16 at 03:50 PM • permalink

 

    1. Me no sabby.
      /sand pebbles

      Posted by andycanuck on 2007 07 16 at 03:51 PM • permalink

 

    1. ItaliCANs eat a lot of Chef Boyardee.

      Posted by SSG Pooh on 2007 07 16 at 03:52 PM • permalink

 

    1. #55, don’t know if Arabic leans left, but it definitely reads left.

      #57 Uh… shouldn’t that be “Puce wapt”?

      Posted by RebeccaH on 2007 07 16 at 03:55 PM • permalink

 

    1. #68 Rebecca: that’s right. And do you know, if you type Arabic into Word, choosing letters from the Insert Symbols function, and want to cut and paste, you have to highlight from right to left.

      #62: Yeah, south of the rivah is the place to be, I suppose, although I like Henrico. At one time (may still be true) the police chief for Henrico County was an ex-highway patrol officer. It was said that you could kill, rob or rape but you damned well better not break the speed limit.

      Posted by paco on 2007 07 16 at 04:31 PM • permalink

 

    1. #67 “ItaliCANs eat a lot of Chef Boyardee.”

      To an Italian-American them are fightin’ words.

      Posted by Room 237 on 2007 07 16 at 04:35 PM • permalink

 

    1. Que lastima!

      Posted by mojo on 2007 07 16 at 04:54 PM • permalink

 

    1. Hahahaha, apart from me thinking Irf was Australian born based on hearing his constant refrain:

      Some say we need to do more. So we will condemn and condemn and condemn terrorists again and again. Some say our mosques need to be closed down and we need to go back to where we came from. No problem. I will go back to East Ryde. My Muslim friends mentioned earlier will leave Concord and go back to Marrickville.

      He himself can’t claim ESL status, unless one speaks Pacolese in East Ryde.

      Posted by saint on 2007 07 16 at 04:58 PM • permalink

 

    1. Oh, my!  We have a lot of racists on this blog!  Anti-Italicans, the lot of us.

      <waves at Media Watch>

      Posted by The_Real_JeffS on 2007 07 16 at 05:05 PM • permalink

 

    1. PS:  wronwright, perhaps you should contact Media Watch, and gain their support in your most noble of noble causes.

      I for one welcome our new Italican overlords.

      /pro-Italican dhimmification mode

      Posted by The_Real_JeffS on 2007 07 16 at 05:07 PM • permalink

 

    1. Irf’s still stupid.

      Posted by kae on 2007 07 16 at 05:23 PM • permalink

 

    1. Democratic Rep. Keith Ellison, the first Muslim elected to Congress, is defending himself Monday after comparing President Bush to Adolf Hitler and leaving
      In Meeting With Atheists, Rep. Ellison Compares President Bush to Hitler
      the impression the administration may have rigged the Sept. 11, 2001, terror attacks.

      Pot calling the kettle, black.

      OH wait, HE is. Great job Minnesota.

      Fox News

      Anyone else want a Margarita?

      Posted by El Cid on 2007 07 16 at 05:31 PM • permalink

 

    1. Steady on Blair – no matter how aggrieved you may feel, you can’t just go around calling people names like “Age content provider”.

      Posted by Margos Maid on 2007 07 16 at 05:54 PM • permalink

 

    1. #76 El Cid:
      The irony, well she just keeps giving, no? Nation of Islam member speaking to Atheists compares Christian guy to Hitler. Really, I think my irony meter hit 11 and broke.

      Atheists for Human Rights. Not quite Nihilsts for Moral Progress, or Militant Atheists for Non-Violent Change, but kinda funny.

      Posted by brett_l on 2007 07 16 at 06:26 PM • permalink

 

    1. More linguistic humor.

      Posted by paco on 2007 07 16 at 06:27 PM • permalink

 

    1. I can’t tell Italicans apart, they all look alike to me.  Next thing you know, they’ll start teaching Italiconics in school as a second language.

      Posted by RebeccaH on 2007 07 16 at 06:39 PM • permalink

 

    1. Crikey!  Look at the mess you made!

      Posted by peter m on 2007 07 16 at 06:45 PM • permalink

 

    1. I think his point was rather that your commitment to sourcing the best in original written opinion goes no further than the re-publishing of press releases. You [The Daily Telegraph] people are hacks.

      This from a publication (Crikey) which is largely built on anonymous and “Off the record” tips?

      Posted by Dan Lewis on 2007 07 16 at 06:56 PM • permalink

 

    1. Dis wan blog bilong to himpella blair.
      Him bigpella master. Gibbim lip n he bin after yuse in big matakar wiv dat wun tubble motar.
      Him puk yu up properly.
      No puckin worries.

      Posted by Pickles on 2007 07 16 at 06:57 PM • permalink

 

    1. 78 brett_l

      I think my irony meter hit 11 and broke.

      Gosh, you must have one of those expensive ones. Mine would go past 4, till it busted.

      Posted by El Cid on 2007 07 16 at 07:03 PM • permalink

 

    1. Hacks with a real job, not like snotty Green and the fallacious Crikey.  Irfan says he will piss orf back to East Ryde, no my friend if you don’t help silence the jihadi taqiyya mob, many ordinary Muslims may find themselves on the wrong side of society.

      Posted by Howzat on 2007 07 16 at 07:56 PM • permalink

 

    1. I believe Irfan Yusuf’s points, writings (of which i have made it my duty to read a few) and those of Crikey’s could also be referred to as a TSL* thing.

      *Thinking as a Second Language.

      Humble regards to Paco.

      Posted by carpefraise on 2007 07 16 at 08:20 PM • permalink

 

    1. Ash, I fixed the italics problem. (Comment #35.) Watch those buttons, people!

      Posted by Andrea Harris, Administrator on 2007 07 16 at 08:29 PM • permalink

 

    1. #84: Gosh, you must have one of those expensive ones. Mine would go past 4, till it busted.

      That’s what happens when you don’t buy from Paco Industries!

      Posted by paco on 2007 07 16 at 08:35 PM • permalink

 

    1. 87:

      There’s a handy “close all” button that ppl may want to use when trying to be clever little format junkies.

      Hope this works, or I’m having eggs off face for lunch!

      Maybe Irf’s problem is his opinion is much too coloured by his 5 months living overseas before emigrating to the land of free speech?

      Posted by peter m on 2007 07 16 at 08:35 PM • permalink

 

    1. Paco, you’re hilarious!

      Buy a Paco T-shirt today $14.99 !

      Posted by 1.618 on 2007 07 16 at 08:37 PM • permalink

 

    1. Tim, you never put my dot drawings on the front!

      Posted by 1.618 on 2007 07 16 at 08:39 PM • permalink

 

    1. My guess is that Blair doesn’t want to be upstaged, 1.6.

      Posted by Margos Maid on 2007 07 16 at 08:52 PM • permalink

 

    1. #83.  Em nau!  Tru tok, olgeta rubisman i craiaut ‘harim mi!’ stret, na lukim, e rubisman iet!

      Posted by Olrence on 2007 07 16 at 08:54 PM • permalink

 

    1. #93: Easy for you to say . . .

      Posted by paco on 2007 07 16 at 08:56 PM • permalink

 

    1. Morning Margo!

      Posted by 1.618 on 2007 07 16 at 09:01 PM • permalink

 

    1. …………..>  o ping

      “Bee Sting” by 1.618 For Sale $4.99

      Posted by 1.618 on 2007 07 16 at 09:02 PM • permalink

 

    1. #94. It’s New Guinea pidgin, which lends itself
      very well to imprecation and abuse.  I’ve also seen Shakespear (particularly Macbeth) translated into pidgin.  Only seemed odd at first, but after a while sounded perfectly normal.

      Posted by Olrence on 2007 07 16 at 09:03 PM • permalink

 

    1. #97

      Only seemed odd at first, but after a while sounded perfectly normal.

      A bit like the real thing.

      Posted by kae on 2007 07 16 at 09:11 PM • permalink

 

    1. null

      Well, if you think this is true, it’s an interesting ride.??

      Posted by 1.618 on 2007 07 16 at 09:23 PM • permalink

 

    1. Never new it was an ESL problem. I just assumed Irf’s fingers were too fat for the keyboard.

      Posted by Infidel Tiger on 2007 07 16 at 09:44 PM • permalink

 

    1. #93
      U bigpella blair wontok?

      Posted by Pickles on 2007 07 16 at 10:03 PM • permalink

 

    1. #101. Wantok nogat, olsem mi laik lukim dispela toksave ‘blog’, igat olgeta man na meri tumas fani.  Ting ting olgeta hia husat tok i wantok tru.  Na yu?

      Posted by Olrence on 2007 07 16 at 10:40 PM • permalink

 

    1. My favourite phrase in nuigini pidjin:

      “bigpela mixmasta him bilong jesus”  =  helicopter

      Posted by mareeS on 2007 07 16 at 10:53 PM • permalink

 

    1. #103. MareeS, did’ya ever hear the one for a piano?  Bikpela kais, yu kilim tis bilong im na i kraiaut. (A big box, and when you hit it’s teeth it shouts).  Many of the phrases, particularly from decades ago, are pure gems.
      The PNGers tend to be much more worldly these days, so less incredulous at new technology.

      Bless ‘em.

      Posted by Olrence on 2007 07 16 at 11:06 PM • permalink

 

    1. #78 #84 #88 That would be the Perfectly Accurate Contempt-Ometer®. PACO® let’s you know when someone else misses the point—even when it’s cranked up to 11.

      Posted by andycanuck on 2007 07 16 at 11:19 PM • permalink

 

    1. Room Service

      Room Service: “Morny. ruin sorbees.”

      Green: “Sorry, I thoughtI dialed room-service.”

      Room Service: “Rye. Ruin sorbees.. morny! Djewish to odor sunteen?”

      Green: “Uh.. yes.. I’d like some bacon and eggs.”

      Room Service: “Ow July den?”

      Green: “What??”

      Room Service: “Ow July den – fry, boy, pooch?”

      Green: “Oh, the eggs! How do I like them? Sorry, scrambled, please.”

      Room Service: “Ow July dee bayhkem – crease?”

      Green: “Crisp will be fine.”

      Room Service: “Hokay. An San tos?”

      Green: “What?”

      Room Service: “San tos. July San tos?”

      Green: “I don’t think so.”

      Room Service: “No? Judo one toes?”

      Green: “I really feel bad about this, but I don’t know what ‘judo one toes’ means.”

      Room Service: “Toes! Toes!.. Why djew Don Juan toes? Ow bow singlish mopping we bother?”

      Green: “English muffin!! I’ve got it! You were saying ‘Toast.’ Fine. Yes, an English muffin will be fine.”

      Room Service: “We bother?”

      Green: “No, just put the bother on the side.”

      Room Service: “Wad?”

      Green: “I mean butter – just put it on the side.”

      Room Service: “Copy?”

      Green: “Sorry?”

      Room Service: “Copy…tea…mill?”

      Green: “Yes. Coffee please, and that’s all.”

      Room Service: “One Minnie. Ass ruin torino fee, strangle ache, crease bayhkem, tossy singlish mopping we bother honey sigh, and copy… rye?”

      Green: “Whatever you say.”

      Room Service: “Tendjewberrymud.”

      Green: “You’re welcome.”

      Posted by egg_ on 2007 07 16 at 11:29 PM • permalink

 

    1. #104, Olrence, I’d forgotten that one. I used to have lots of pidgin when I was young, but have lost most of it now. When we were back in PNG last year didn’t need much more than “Tu bias plis, tenk U.”

      Posted by mareeS on 2007 07 17 at 12:21 AM • permalink

 

    1. #106. I just laughed so hard, I formed a snot bubble.

      Posted by Abu Chowdah on 2007 07 17 at 04:17 AM • permalink

 

    1. #106, that is a masterpiece.

      Posted by mr creosote on 2007 07 17 at 06:27 AM • permalink

 

    1. #108 #109 🙂
      An oldie but a goodie … Google: ‘Tendjewberrymud’

      Posted by egg_ on 2007 07 17 at 10:21 AM • permalink

 

    1. Hmmmm.

      @ Andrea Harris, Administrator

      “Watch those buttons, people!”

      May I suggest that the buttons put both the start tag and end tag into the textarea at the same time?  Particularly since the tags appear at the end of any text already in the textarea.

      That would probably prevent many of the problems we run into with missing end tags.

      Posted by memomachine on 2007 07 17 at 11:59 AM • permalink

 

    1. #111
      I highlight the text I want to tag and like magic it all works out. (Tags start and finish OK.)

      Unless I cock it up.

      ahem.

      Posted by kae on 2007 07 17 at 05:29 PM • permalink

 

    1. Dear Opinion Editor of the Terror, that’s not a “correction” they published, that’s your letter to the editor. Stick that in your press release and print it, you waning, diminishing,  pamphleteer.

      Posted by Miranda Divide on 2007 07 17 at 09:22 PM • permalink

 

    1. Seagull alert.

      Posted by kae on 2007 07 17 at 09:46 PM • permalink

 

    1. you waning, diminishing, pamphleteer

      That one’s too subtle for me. Is it Pidgin?

      Posted by Henry boy on 2007 07 17 at 11:32 PM • permalink

 

    1. Okay, I think miranda is “wanting to finishing improv theater”.

      Whatever THAT means.

      Posted by wreckage on 2007 07 18 at 08:09 AM • permalink

 

    1. From the wikipedia page on Irfan:

      Irfan Yusuf (born 1969) is an Australian lawyer of Pakistani descent, born in Karachi, Pakistan. He arrived in Australia 5 months later. His parents are from Delhi.

      No problem there – except that in public forums Irfan has represented himself somehwat differently….  (from J.F. Beck’s post about Steyn’s visit to Australia and his lecture at the C.I.S.)

      G’day. Um, I’m Australian and I also happen to be Muslim, and I’m second and third generation Muslim, and I just wanted to ask Mark Steyn this….

      There’s wiggle room there in the semantics, but its pretty obvious what the average listener would assume he meant.

      Posted by ekb87 on 2007 07 20 at 09:12 AM • permalink

 

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