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Last updated on March 6th, 2018 at 12:31 am
Kevin Rudd speaks of forks and roads and bridges:
This fork in the road has emerged because John Howard has taken a bridge too far — a bridge too far on industrial relations, a bridge too far when it comes to Iraq, and a bridge too far on climate change by not going far enough.
Er, OK. The Age’s Katharine Murphy finds Rudd’s forkishness foxy:
Can someone tell me why our hard working, bookish, buttoned-up intellectual Kevin Rudd is suddenly looking … kind of sexy?
No, Katharine. Nobody can tell you. Nobody on earth.
- Uh… sexy? I saw the video. I don’t think so.Posted by RebeccaH on 2006 12 05 at 11:50 AM • permalink
- * vomit, vomit *
And you know for all the reputed intellectual gifts of this KRudd fellow, that whole incoherent opening ramble he gave really makes we wonder just how much of a genius he really is…
It was so wretched it should rightly hang round his neck like an albatross… In terms of saying something to launch his new candidacy to take over from Howard, it rathers strikes me as a bit of an own goal???
I guess there is a difference in being a really smart guy, and yet being able to apply it to the real world with some common sense…
Not that it makes much difference to sh!t-for-brains individuals such as Katharine of course….
- All I know is that it is FOUR FRIGGING DEGREES here in Chicago. And that is 4 degrees Farenheit, not that Celsius metric stuff you funny speaking furriners use. 4 is friggin cold.
Get AL Gore on the line NOW! If we have global warming, I WANT IT WARM DAMMIT! I want to go skinny dipping in Lake Michigan on New Years Day!
- Merlin: Obviously, Rudd picked a bad time to start sniffing glue.Posted by Patrick Chester on 2006 12 05 at 12:24 PM • permalink
- …and a bridge too far on climate change by not going far enough.
I assume, then, that the Kruddler’s upcoming ten-day all states tour won’t involve the use of aircraft or motor vehicles?Posted by HisHineness on 2006 12 05 at 12:24 PM • permalink
- A bridge too far this and a bridge too far that. Geez, now we have dusted off the WW11 metaphors.
OH NO!! Update on Gates hearing. Lieberman had better watch for that fork in the back. He just told Gates that his job was to advise the President on how to SUCCEED in Iraq. Heresy, pure heresy!
Lieberman sounded like a statesman. If he wasn’t such a lefty on domestic policy I would vote for him for President.
- Katherine Murphy has obviously spent the last ten years on a deserted island surrounded by nothing but scrub brush and komodo dragons. Is it any wonder that upon her return to civilization she should meet Kevin Rudd at the door wearing nothing but a smile, melt in his arms murmuring, “My man!”, then throw him over her shoulder and run off with him to her boudoir? Well, yes, to tell you the truth, I do still have to wonder why. . .
I didn’t watch any of the videos, but what does Ms. Murphy mean when she says that “Kevin going the nut was a first” ? Did he froth at the mouth? Did his limbs go all spastic like a fly sprayed with malathion? Did he drop to the floor and curl into a fetal position? Oh, lord, no! He didn’t whip open a trench coat did he?
Can someone tell me why our hard working, bookish, buttoned-up intellectual Kevin Rudd is suddenly looking … kind of sexy?
That’s a rather peculiar fetish you have there, Ms. Murphy.Posted by Spiny Norman on 2006 12 05 at 12:48 PM • permalink
- Hey, Kev, if you’re interested, I’ve got a bridge in Brooklyn…
Yes, Our Julia looked at Our Kevin just like Princess Diana used to look at Prince Charles — before Dodi and Camilla and that whole horrible mess — with steadfast gaze, not once averting her eyes unless it became necessary to look intently down the barrel of a television camera.
Please, somebody, slip this panting dog a bone.
In fairness to Katharine, though, you just never know what or who will tickle your fancy at any given moment. I’ve had some pretty weird experiences along those lines myself.Posted by Kyda Sylvester on 2006 12 05 at 01:09 PM • permalink
- Note to self,. Do not buy a copy of Age; shun my eyes even to look at one on a newstand.
On another note, do these people really want to open up a constitutional debate?Posted by Wimpy Canadian on 2006 12 05 at 01:52 PM • permalink
- If you want to look thin then hang around with fat people.
If you want to look smart then hang around with the Left.
If you want to look sexy then hang around with Julia Gillard.Posted by Jack Lacton on 2006 12 05 at 01:57 PM • permalink
- “a bridge too far on climate change by not going far enough”
Too far is not far enough.
It’s beyond parody.Posted by John Fembup on 2006 12 05 at 02:10 PM • permalink
- Bigots at the Muslim Village Forum strike again.
The second story I find it really hard to get annoyed about, as long as I get the same freedom to soil the Qu’ran. If only they sold double-ply versions!Posted by Quentin George on 2006 12 05 at 03:58 PM • permalink
- Question Time in the House was great yesterday, quite a few of the Ministers picked up on Rudd’s forks and buckets and various speakers picked up on it afterwards. Some of it may seem incidental but it was quite smugly delivered.
Mr HOWARD-We inherited, dare I say, a ‘bucketload’ of debt when we faced that ‘fork in the road’ in March 1996 and we went down the path of debt retirement and the elimination of budget deficits.
Mr IAN MACFARLANE-Martin, we know what
you said. It is in the report and I am going to quote it in a minute. Australia’s uranium exports have reached a record $573 million in 2005. Of course, Australia has bucketloads of uranium—some 40 per cent of the world’s known uranium reserves and the potential to take an even larger share of this export pie…To borrow a phrase, the Labor Party has reached a fork in the road.
Mr ABBOTT-In fact, since 2003 the GP bulk-billing rate in Griffith has increased by more than six percentage points; so I suggest that one fork in the road that
the new Leader of the Opposition might be inclined to take is to tell the truth in health—or perhaps that is a bridge too far for him.
Mr BAIRD (Cook) (3.54 pm)—I congratulate the new Leader of the Opposition and Deputy Leader of the Opposition. I hear from the Deputy Leader of the Opposition that the road for Labor is inexorably up, undoubtedly leading to the bridge too far.
Mr RUDDOCK-I am pleased and, in the spirit of goodwill, acknowledge that Labor will support the government on the passage of the bill. But I have to say that it is taking it a
bridge too far to suggest that the government listened to Labor on copyright.
Mr MICHAEL FERGUSON-For anyone, cloning is a bridge too far. It ought to be a bridge too
far for both the Christian and the atheist
- If Katharine is saying that she finds Ruddyboy sexy, the obvious solution is that she find either her specs or her tablets, or change both immediately.Posted by SwinishCapitalist on 2006 12 05 at 04:41 PM • permalink
- Katharine Murphy suddenly finds Kevin Rudd sexy because, like all leftie chicks, they disdain the uncool dork until suddenly he’s in a position of power.
Nothing opens a leftie chick’s legs faster than a ministry or leadership – just ask the males in Qld’s Goss and Beattie Governments.
— NickPosted by The Thin Man Returns on 2006 12 05 at 04:45 PM • permalink
- In his first major speech yesterday, it seemed obvious that Rudd wants a 1950s Australia. Huge tariff barriers. White picket fences. Mum at home. Dad home at 5, dinner on the table. No foreign workers. Australia riding the sheeps back; cosy, isolated and isolated.
I’m sorry, but we have moved on. We are a small nation, part of a very competitive world. Howard has done very well to bring us into the new world. Rudd has a lovely dream, but that’s all it is.Posted by boxofmatches on 2006 12 05 at 04:48 PM • permalink
- Per link provided in #20 by Quentin George –
Two Muslim students have been expelled from an Islamic school in Melbourne for urinating and spitting on a Bible and setting it on fire.
Oh oh. The Presbyterians are starting to buckle. They’re preparing the Molotov cocktails as we speak.Posted by wronwright on 2006 12 05 at 05:13 PM • permalink
Saddam is not the Labor leader?Posted by Margos Maid on 2006 12 05 at 06:23 PM • permalink
- #31 Dminor: The computer version was temporarily shelved, but will hit the market next summer. For Christmas, we’re putting all our effort into “Gore-ball Warming”, an interactive video game which features Al Gore being chased through the snow-covered streets of Miami Beach by a herd of yetis; he must simultaneously avoid being devoured by his pursuers AND melt the snow with Thermitron Gamma Grenades. The Consumer Products Division of Paco Enterprises is a strong proponent of educational games.
- Murphy on Rudd: Kind of weird, kind of mad, kind of good.
Well, the whole weird/mad/good schtick worked so well for Labor in the past (cf. Mark Latham), why not reprise it?Posted by Apparatchik on 2006 12 05 at 07:12 PM • permalink
- Congratulations, Kath. The fact that you go all atwitter over a man’s alleged sex appeal rather than his policies, leadership ability or wisdom proves, once and for all, that the Left shouldn’t govern anything more important than a dinner party.Posted by blandwagon on 2006 12 05 at 08:18 PM • permalink
- Let them govern the dinner party. Just don’t let them leave before you’ve counted the silverware.Posted by SwinishCapitalist on 2006 12 05 at 08:25 PM • permalink
- Spooning leads to forking.Posted by Infidel Tiger on 2006 12 05 at 09:03 PM • permalink
- The ‘bridge too far’ refers to the 1944 Market Garden campaign in Arnhem, occupied Holland, an attempt to break through German lines which came unstuck. The phrase comes from Monty himself. It was a brave, if unsuccessful, attempt to end the war quickly and save lives.
If Rudd had his way WWII would have ended in 1950. Labor’s current timidity and ‘rollback’ mentality matches the phrase well.
- Rudd is up the creek without a paddle if he doesn’t clean up his clichés…Posted by richard mcenroe on 2006 12 05 at 09:20 PM • permalink
- I hope Mr. Rudd is offsetting his greenhouse gas emissions, jet-setting around Australia to sell himself and all.
You can do that now I’m told. Al Gore does it and I think George Clooney offsets as well.
All Kevin needs to do is calculate his emissions (I saw this happen on Sunrise- they got calculated) then he compensates by planting a forest in Siberia or the equivalent.
If I didn’t know better I’d think calculating personal emissions is a Rovian plot.
It’s very easy to say you want to save the planet BUT when it starts either costing you something or you get tagged a hypocrite well I wonder how many ecofriendlies will get a little less enthusiastic.
- #38 xyzl
You know Rudd pretty inexperienced as a leader but what’s the worst he could do as PM, get us into a war? Oh wait a minute…
Gee, which of our recent trolls kept using “Oh wait a minute…” ? I think xyzl can see that itwont last as long as its last incarnation, choosing a, um, kinda simple nom be blog. Quite appropriate though.
But since you mention it,gee, who was that dork about 1939 that got us into a war as well? First the Germans, then the Japanese fer chrissake! Got us into a war with the Japanese! Gotta hate these warmongers. Evil people. I’m all for our political leaders curling up in a ball, closing their eys and thinks “I’m allright Jack! Tough chedder for everyone getting slaughtered overseas by dictators. The wogs don’t deserve democracy anyway.”
Yay Latham! Yay lil’ Kevvie.
<I know, I know, don’t feed the trolls, but sometimes we need to be reminded of the mono neurones on the other side.>Posted by Stop Continental Drift! on 2006 12 05 at 09:49 PM • permalink
- At Robert Frost: The Road Not Taken (1915) we read:
“I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I –
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.“
So KRudd is travelling on different road to everyone else. So that explains everything.Posted by stackja1945 on 2006 12 05 at 10:12 PM • permalink
- Maybe Rudd’s crossing the bridge Bill Clinton built to the future.
Sorry, ‘jimbo, but ladies never tell. And neither do standup broads.Posted by Kyda Sylvester on 2006 12 05 at 10:13 PM • permalink
- Can someone tell me why our hard working, bookish, buttoned-up intellectual Kevin Rudd is suddenly looking … kind of sexy?
In defense of sanity, I feel compelled to point out that some men make the bookish intellectual quite sexy. Anthony Stewart Head, who played Rupert Giles on “Buffy the Vampire Slayer,” has a huge female fan following simply for being nifty. David Tennant, the latest Doctor on “Doctor Who,” is irreproachable in a pinstriped suit and tennis shoes. But Kevin Rudd? No. No. Ouch no.
Oddly enough, the left has all the pretty celebrities, but the right has all the down-to-earth regular lookers. Check zombietime for confirmation. Maybe this is Kathy’s instinctive reaction to the lack of eye candy on her side of the fence?Posted by Tungsten Monk on 2006 12 05 at 10:21 PM • permalink
- Q: You are walking down the road to buy a bag of donuts when you come to a fork in the road. Turning down the wrong road could mean going a bridge too far. Standing at the fork are two people – one is a pathological liar the other tells the truth. You are allowed to ask them only one question. How do you find your donuts?
(Answer soon folks!)Posted by Margos Maid on 2006 12 05 at 10:30 PM • permalink
- A: Ask Rudd which way to the donut shop, and then go the other way.Posted by Margos Maid on 2006 12 05 at 10:32 PM • permalink
- A fork is a fork
a hork! a hork!
And no one can talk to the Dork of Fork –
That is of course unless the dork
Is the famous Mister Rudd.
Go right to the source and ask the dork –
He’ll give you a bucketload you’ll endorse
He’s always on a steady course
Talk to Mister Rudd!
People yakity-yak a streak
And waste your time of day,
But Mister Rudd will never speak
Unless he has something to say!
The Dork of Fork
who uses a fork in the road of course
And this one will talk ‘till his voice is hoarse
You never heard of a talking dork?
Well listen to this:
“I am Mister RUDDDD!”
- This is mean, but Rudd is intensely media conscious. So when he is going to get his wife to drop the 80s poodle hairstyle (Christie Allen)?
http://www.theaustralian.news.com.au/photogallery/0,9493,9^^25176,00.htmlPosted by boxofmatches on 2006 12 05 at 11:11 PM • permalink
- This may cure Katharine:
http://www.theaustralian.news.com.au/photogallery/0,9493,12^^25176,00.htmlPosted by boxofmatches on 2006 12 05 at 11:13 PM • permalink
- Jeebus! He’s the anglo Kim Jong-ilPosted by Infidel Tiger on 2006 12 05 at 11:15 PM • permalink
- maybe a restraining order on ms murphy stopping her getting within fifty feet of any garden gnomes would be appropriate. think of the gnomes people!Posted by eeniemeenie on 2006 12 05 at 11:15 PM • permalink
- imagine being that desperate for a forkPosted by eeniemeenie on 2006 12 05 at 11:19 PM • permalink
- #73 – Close, but Kev is tiny.Posted by boxofmatches on 2006 12 05 at 11:26 PM • permalink
- He’s much better without the glassesPosted by Margos Maid on 2006 12 05 at 11:33 PM • permalink
- This is definitely O/T
As the cricket thread is stuffed I’d like to thank Mr Bingley and Paco and wronwright for their wonderfully funny and clever comments
Even though it took a while to read these blokes must be in contention to become cricket commentators in the US when cricket is finally recognised over there as THE game
Beaut stuff!Posted by aussiemagpie on 2006 12 05 at 11:46 PM • permalink
- The gnome also has the annoying habit of staring at the PM when asking questions in Question Time. Then steadfastly ignoring the answer, either by writing or swivelling around and talking to the cabal behind him.Posted by boxofmatches on 2006 12 06 at 12:14 AM • permalink
- Humpf? Man’s infrastructure obsessed.Posted by James Waterton on 2006 12 06 at 04:43 AM • permalink
A fork in the road at ground zero?
- ’A Labor Party led by Kevin Rudd will be focused on the future’-
they’ve spent ten years obsessed with the idea that jwh is taking us back to the 50’s so i guess from their perspective the 70s are the future.
at least the cia can nab whitlam before he forks the country this time round. (please)Posted by eeniemeenie on 2006 12 06 at 08:01 AM • permalink
- Achillea—but he could have saved everybody a lot of tsuris if he’d just slapped Willow a good one when she got all mouthy.Posted by richard mcenroe on 2006 12 06 at 09:26 PM • permalink
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