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Last updated on July 16th, 2017 at 12:42 pm
The best idea for a cartoon since Poochie:
Dino Squad is about a group of teenagers who can change into dinosaurs; they battle an evil velociraptor trying to accelerate global warming.
Actually, the poor ‘raptor is merely trying to restore earth to its pristine pre-humankind state:
Dino Squad features five quirky teens who suddenly gain the power to transform into dinosaurs. Guided by their science teacher, they learn to work together and use their unique abilities to protect Earth from an anthropomorphic Velociraptor who is creating mutant-saurs and accelerating global warming in his quest to bring back the age of the dinosaurs.
It’ll be interesting to see how this anthropomorphic velociraptor goes about increasing global warming. Maybe we can pick up some tips.
This sounds like a piss poor knock off of Captain Planet and the Planeteers.
And, boy, did that cartoon stink!
Posted by The_Real_JeffS on 2007 08 28 at 12:33 PM • permalink
Environmentalists pitted against a velociraptor. Ah, if only……..
Posted by ThinAndBritish on 2007 08 28 at 12:46 PM • permalink
Yeah, T&B, the velociraptors in the Jurassic Park series usually succeeded in lowering humans from our normal top spot in the food chain, even the armed ones.
And environmentalists generally aren’t armed………..
Posted by The_Real_JeffS on 2007 08 28 at 12:51 PM • permalink
In Episode 6, the series comes to an abrupt end when the students visit the Arctic Circle to protest the effects of global warming – and discover why dinosaurs really don’t like cold weather.
Posted by JDFlanagan on 2007 08 28 at 01:00 PM • permalink
#7 And environmentalists generally aren’t armed………..
They certainly wouldn’t be if they came up against one of JP’s raptors. Or legged, or gutted. No, wait, they’d probably be gutted….
In reality, velociraptors were significantly smaller and less intelligent than they were portrayed in JP.
Still enough to kill a hippie though….
Posted by ThinAndBritish on 2007 08 28 at 01:03 PM • permalink
Still enough to kill a hippie though….
Good enough for me.
Posted by The_Real_JeffS on 2007 08 28 at 01:04 PM • permalink
In this corner, representing Global Warming… Leonardo “Pretty Boy” DiCaprio, Al “The Screaming Bore” Gore, and the Diiiiiinnnnoooo Squaaaaadddd…!
And in this corner, representing Rational Skepticism… Freeman “The Sphere of Fear” Dyson, Reid The Father of Modern Climatology Bryson, and NAAAAASSSSSSSSAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!
ARE YOU READY TO RUUUUUMMMMBBBLLLLE???
I’m not so sure we want to rely on dinosaurs to save us, since they, you know, kind of like all died out by themselves.
Posted by Mr. Bingley on 2007 08 28 at 01:31 PM • permalink
We’ve come a long way from Rocky and Bullwinkle v. Boris and Natasha.
Posted by rightwingprof on 2007 08 28 at 01:52 PM • permalink
I liked the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles better.
And they preferred pizza, not people.
Besides which, which ‘saur species are represented in the Dino Squad (the link doesn’t work for me, probably a network issue)? I hope they’re all vegetarians….they’re better eating than pure carnivores.
Posted by The_Real_JeffS on 2007 08 28 at 02:11 PM • permalink
OT, but you really MUST check out this entry by Glenn Reynolds:
It’s not the idiocy, it’s the property values.
“On August 26, 2007, the Los Angeles Times published an article explaining why the city council of Santa Barbara has been prevented from painting a blue line across the city to mark how high the water will be if you believe Al Gore’s prediction that global warming will make the oceans rise by 23 feet. The idea was not defeated because people realize that Gore’s prediction is silly and wrong, but because a realtor threatened a law suit based on the argument that property values below the line would fall.”
Glenn’s link to the La La Land Times requires a subscription, but you really don’t need to read the original article, do you? It’s lunacy squared anyway.
I laughed until I cried. Liberalism really, actually is insanity.
Interesting concept. We encourage our excess teenage to morph into Dinos and thereby ensure our oil reserves are continually replenished.
This could mean a massive shift in advertising.
No more need for the “hey, lay off our ass, we’re doing idiot greeny crap too!” commercials.
These to be replaced with “Bite it numbnuts, we got oil forever now!” commercials.
Given that Velociraptor-man is just trying to return global temperatures to how they were way back in the day, doesn’t that make him the supreme environementalist? He wants to fix “global cooling” that caused the extinction of 80% of earth’s life.
Sheesh. I thought environmentalists gave a shit about other life forms. I guess not!
Posted by Quentin George on 2007 08 28 at 05:04 PM • permalink
#15. rightwingprof: We’ve come a long way from Rocky and Bullwinkle v. Boris and Natasha.
I’d love to see a Fractured Fairy Tales version of Algore’s inconvenient story.
Posted by Dave in Chicago on 2007 08 28 at 05:06 PM • permalink
It’ll be interesting to see how this anthropomorphic velociraptor goes about increasing global warming. Maybe we can pick up some tips.
Beans. Lots and lots of beans.
Posted by Blue State Sil on 2007 08 28 at 05:21 PM • permalink
- Vincent Veloci: “How will I do it? Well, since I have you now and you can’t possibly escape, I’ll tell you before leaving you to die by yourself.
“You’ve been looking for a machine that can disrupt climate. And finally…you’ve found it. That’s right, Hornyboy*. I am the machine! I am the Prehistoric Anthropomorphic Climate Overdriver.**”* Hornyboy – name of boy character who transforms into triceratops.** Genetically modified, making use of the velociraptor’s naturally gifted intestinal tract to produce a super-concentrated uber-methane greenhouse gas. Which is why his character’s the multi-millionaire head of Taco Bell.
Hope I’m not sued for divulging plot secrets.
Wasn’t there an old Doctor Who story with dinosaurs roaming the streets of London, part of some wacko group’s attempt to return the Earth to a “Golden Age”?
Can’t remember much of it now, but I can guarantee you, early 1970’s Dr Who, the dinosaur effects must have been superb, a template for Spielberg’s Jurassic Park 20 years later.
I mean, T-Rex’s do look a lot like Basil Brush, don’t they?
Wussy dinos – G-Force could totally kick their tails.
Posted by Blue State Sil on 2007 08 28 at 06:18 PM • permalink
Actually, the poor ‘raptor is merely trying to restore earth to its pristine pre-humankind state
Really?
Dinosaurs may not have been killed off by asteroid impact dust blocking out sunlight, a geologist says. Instead, the mass extinction associated with an asteroid impact 65 million years ago might have been caused by soot from global wildfires or sulfuric acid clouds that were a consequence of the collision.
Gee, I would have guessed all the coal mining and burning, steel mills, the automobiles, (think Fred and Barny) Airliners, and algorus terriblus humanus.
Paco, if you’re gonna have that much meat laying around you’re gonng need Richard’s Immense Cooling Hut And Rapid Defroster…
Posted by richard mcenroe on 2007 08 28 at 07:58 PM • permalink
#22: Remember the one with the kid who turned into a sportscar when he got hot?
Ah, the immortal Turbo Teen:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_haRIsvqvG4
If they made this today, it would probably be called Prius Teen.
Tut tut, I hope that the negative portrayal of the velociraptor is not profiling. I for one wish to stand up for the unfair depiction of this creature. Such negative stereotypes should be replaced by aged lizard like creatures of no specific appearance.
By the way, these eco-dinosaur kids, they eat huge swathes of plants to survive and create methane? Just checking.
- Posted by Andrea Harris, Administrator on 2007 08 28 at 10:17 PM • permalink
Cartoons really have made a wrong toin at Albukoykee.
Posted by Infidel Tiger on 2007 08 28 at 10:49 PM • permalink
It’ll be interesting to see how this anthropomorphic velociraptor goes about increasing global warming.
I’m guessing he failed to ratify Kyoto.
Of course, his real scheme is probably to travel all over in greenhouse-belching jets, holding massively wasteful concert events that generate huge amounts of CO2.
Interesting… Godzilla born in Kyoto.
Posted by Infidel Tiger on 2007 08 29 at 12:00 AM • permalink
Are you kidding, this is brilliant denialist propaganda! A weekly reminder to the young ‘uns that the Earth was warm and tropical and devoid of glaciers altogether long before man arrived on the scene and started driving SUVs.
What better way to undermine Gore Warming alarmism?
P.S. Can’t wait for the explanation of why some velociraptor has managed to live for 165 million years and looks like a hippie in an Armani suit.
Posted by Shaky Barnes on 2007 08 29 at 01:28 AM • permalink
But if dinosaurs cause global warming, I’d imagine through farting, shouldn’t the kids or their teacher kill them when they turn into dinosaurs? Unless they buy carbon credits, I suppose. Or get them for killing other dinosaurs.
Posted by andycanuck on 2007 08 29 at 01:50 AM • permalink
I think the dino kids should watch out for this strange chap. He adds a few rocks to his collection and he will have them all, animal, vegetable and mineral.
Posted by thefrollickingmole on 2007 08 29 at 02:32 AM • permalink
andycanuck, you mean like these?
Pachycephalosauria Acrocanthosaurus Chilantaisaurus Ornithomimus.
Dino Dictionary
I wonder if they have a consulting palaeontologist? If only we could think of one who was an expert on Global Warming and it’s associated cash for talk benefits.
Posted by Infidel Tiger on 2007 08 29 at 02:43 AM • permalink
- #18 TRJS,
Since they’re lefties and environmentalists I’ll bet they turn into pachycephalosaurs. Those were the ones with a thick, bony cap on top of the skull, making even less room for brains than the usual dinosaur. It would be appropriate, since pachycephalosaurs were herbivores, i.e. vegans.Incidentally, all the dinosaurs in Jurassic Park were forms that lived in the Cretaceous.#62, I can’t answer why the velociraptor looks like a hippie. As for a velociraptor living 165 million years, to survive into our age, the answer should be obvious to any RWDB in good standing at this site.
“WRONWRIGHT, what have you been doing with the Tardis NOW?”
Posted by Michael Lonie on 2007 08 29 at 02:47 AM • permalink
- Oh dear, higher prices for food due to Gerbil worming??
Lefties dont know which way to squirm.But at least its still the Americans fault…
“Challenged by President George Bush to produce 35bn gallons of non-fossil transport fuels by 2017 to reduce US dependency on imported oil, the Jagels family and thousands of farmers like them are patriotically turning the corn belt of America from the bread basket of the world into an enormous fuel tank.”
True to form “women and minorities hit hardest…”“But the surge in demand for agrofuels such as ethanol is hitting the poor and the environment the hardest. The UN World Food Programme, which feeds about 90m people mostly with US maize, reckons that 850m people around the world are already undernourished. There will soon be more because the price of food aid has increased 20% in just a year. Meanwhile, Indian food prices have risen 11% in a year, the price of the staple tortilla quadrupled in Mexico in February and crowds of 75,000 people came on to the streets in protest. South Africa has seen food-price rises of nearly 17%, and China was forced to halt all new planting of corn for ethanol after staple foods such as pork soared by 42% last year.”
Most poor countries rely on agriculture for the basics of their economy. Food aid distorts that economy making farmers poorer. I hope that the removal of great amounts of American food aid will actually improve the incomes of many 3rd worlders by making agriculture viable again.
Posted by thefrollickingmole on 2007 08 29 at 02:58 AM • permalink
Frollicker, all you have to add to the mix is carbon taxes, and the poor are pretty well rooted.
I’m kind of expecting a hospital pass of the federal reins in November, which means that when international price inflation starts to bite, and interest rates rise (which seems to be the only eonomic lever applied by the Left), we can all blame Krudd and his patsies.
Three years (or less!) of pain followed by another decade or two of good governance – sounds about right to me, especially where the electorate is seemingly begging for the pain…
- ***ATTENTION*** a gentle reminder for wronwright
On 2007 08 15 at 10:09 AM EST wronwright said : “At some point in the next two weeks I shall journey to Mumsie’s and look through them for a suitable one”That makes the deadline 2007 08 29 at 10:09 AM EST.One would think that 2 weeks would be plenty of time for him to hire some Belgian mercenaries to storm mumsie’s house and retrieve the prize. I can’t imagine the reason why he would delay.
As I recall, missred said she wanted one with you naked on a bear skin rug.
If you have already submitted your picture to TimB and he is taking his time having the black bars put over your nakedness then please keep in mind that I am not doing this out of meanness or to shame you, but to win miss 1.618’s affections.
Posted by Col. Milquetoast on 2007 08 29 at 03:59 AM • permalink
- Way off-topic, but rather satisfying.
Someone in the office got that email about THE NUMBER ELEVEN. Someone out there is a tad behind, me thinks.
It got forwarded to me, anyhow. I pointed out that IT’S BULLSHIT contains exactly eleven letters, and isn’t that a weird coincidence?Posted by SwinishCapitalist on 2007 08 29 at 04:14 AM • permalink
Episode #17 finds the beautiful and pixy-like Petra Pterosaur frolicking in the gentle blue skies above Gore Gulch, when unexpectedly she is blasted from the skies by guest star Ted Nugent. Scene 8 begins with the shocked faces of the remaining members of the Dino Squad watching in horror as Ted turns the roasting carcass of Petra on a spit over an open flame. Several roadies stand by, drooling in anticipation.
#67 All the dinosaurs in JP were from the Cretaceous.
I thought the sauropods – minor supporting cast members, to be sure – were Jurassic. But your basic point is right. Guess Cretaceous Park doesn’t have the same ring to it, huh? (Be kind and do not point it out if I’m wrong).
Saw a BBC series called Prehistoric Park, with wildlife adventurer Nigel Marvin bringing various dinos and other prehistoric lovelies through a time portal back to our world, where he sets them up in a giant outside zoo/national park. Not bad blend of fact and fiction for the kiddies, but so, so PC – couldn’t help but wince (or was it cringe) seeing a bunch of zoologists armed only with high-powered semi-automatic film cameras tracking T-Rex’s and the like.
Three years (or less!) of pain followed by another decade or two of good governance – sounds about right to me, especially where the electorate is seemingly begging for the pain…
Yup, if the Rudder gets in, hopefully we’ll only have to endure a short-term bout of Whitlamonics before he gets turfed …
#74
Bloodiest Home Videos?
- #69
Our country ruled by the Odd Couple?Caption: New IR rules: Julia Gillard and Kevin Rudd after announcing the policies yesterday
Note the genuine smiles …
#68 the flaw in your theory is that the incentive payments (subsidy) for ethanol make world grain prices dearer. Especially as the US producers most of the grain. Higher prices might be good for the grain growers, but not so good for the poor, or any other industry besides ethanol that uses grain. Hence livestock producers end up poorer. As happens to those that eat weet bix.
So the greenies are right, in this case. Of course, if it wasn’t Bush, they would be less cranky. Also, deep down they probably don’t like it is it might be a get out of gaol card, not enough
punishmentpain involved for the average amerikkkan…..personally, if teh US wanted to reduce your dependence on foreign oil, they would be better off raping the artic tundra, or building enough nukes to crack a shitload of water to get hydrogen.
Something tells me this’ll make the Terrible Thunderlizards look like geniuses.
Squat: Doc, do you think we should tell General Galapagos that a slow-moving mountain of ice is making its way towards Jurassic City, and it’s our fault?
Doc: No. It will only make him angry.
Kutter: Yeah, and when you think about it: how much damage can a slow-moving mountain of ice do?Posted by Patrick Chester on 2007 08 29 at 09:48 AM • permalink
- entropy
Nah not the susidies Im on about, only the removal of aid grain from the African markets.
I cant imagine why youd farm if you knew it would either be grabbed by the government/militas, and the “kind hearted” were going to dump another million tonnes into the system, therefore making your local product worthless.
Its a complicated issue, but I have seen some fairly convincing arguements for soucing “aid” on local markets with cash, before sending in bulkloads of grain “free”.Posted by thefrollickingmole on 2007 08 29 at 10:29 AM • permalink
It’s worth noting that since the film Jurassic Park came out our concept of what near-bird dinosaur lineages looked like has been transformed. Now we know that many of those dinosaur evolutionary lines bore feathers — either downy feathers a la Sesame Street’s “Big Bird” or even the so-called “pennaceous feathers” (feathers having a “central shaft with vanes branching off to either side”) that we usually term flight feathers. Apparently feathers per se were invented by certain (Saurischian) dinosaur lineages before flight was ever evolutionarily conceived of, prior to the ancestors of birds branching off, probably originally for insulation purposes.
Velociraptors, and even tyrannosaurus, fall into this group (though tyrannosaurus was so big that for square-cube reasons it likely retained only a few wisps of feathers as an adult). Velociraptor was a different story, however. As paleontologist Mark Norell of the American Museum of Natural History in New York once put it: “We have as much evidence that Velociraptors had feathers as we do that Neandertals had hair”!
Take a close look, too, at this image of a close Velociraptor relative called Microraptor. Look — and then look again. No, you’re not going crosseyed: microraptor flew (and it did fly) on four wings: the usual two (for birds) stretching out from its arms, and another two extending from its feet. In other words, microraptor was not just a biped but a biplane — rather like early human aircraft!
Posted by Michael McNeil (Impearls) on 2007 08 30 at 01:30 AM • permalink
It is well to note that the theropod dinosaurs that seem to have had feathers were Cretaceous forms, like th Microraptor mentined in #81. Birds already existed, tens of millions of years before these forms arose. Archaeopteryx is found much lower in the rocks than the small Cretacepus theropods that may have had feathers. There are also anatomical details that differentiate theropods from birds, although I must admit I do not remember the details now. Therefore theropod dinosaurs and birds are sister groups, and the latter are not directly descended from the former. There are also significant differences in physiology, although they may have arisin as adaptations to flying. But birds definitely breathe in a different way than dinosaurs did. I had that information from John Ruben of Oregon State University, who is probably the world’s expert on dinosaur physiology.
Ruben showed, by CAT scans of very well preserved theropod skulls, that the nasal cavities of the dinosaurs did not have room for nasal turbinates. Crocodilians do not have them, but all homeothermic anaimals, such as birds and mammals do. These are bony or cartilaginous supports in the nasal passages for membranes that recover water being breathed out by the homeothermic animal. Without them the animal (humans for example) would lose significant amounts of body weight daily through water loss. Theropod dinosaurs, like crocodilians, did not have them. Therefore they must have not been homeothermic or, to put it crudely, they must have been “cold-blooded” like crocs. If the theropods were, then so probably were all the other dinosaurs.
Incidentally there was also a lineage of “cold-blooded” birds in the Cretaceous called Opposite Birds.
“The first large, diverse lineage of short-tailed birds to evolve were the Enantiornithes, or “opposite birds”, so named because the construction of their shoulder bones was the reverse of the condition seen in modern birds. [citation needed] Enantirornithes occupied a wide array of ecological niches, from sand-probing shorebirds and fish-eaters to tree-dwelling forms and seed-eaters. [citation needed] More advanced lineages also specialized in eating fish, like the superficially gull-like subclass of Ichthyornithes (“fish birds”). From the “Wikipedia article on Birds.
Posted by Michael Lonie on 2007 08 30 at 02:10 AM • permalink
We could go back to the Mississippian, when atmospheric oxygen was up to 35% and spontateous fires broke out all over. 🙂
Posted by mythusmage on 2007 08 30 at 03:56 AM • permalink
This will be deep and thought provoking entertainment for lefties everywhere.