Diagnosis time

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Last updated on June 15th, 2017 at 01:38 pm

The New York Times reports:

Doctors in New York City have begun to use a simple questionnaire to determine if a patient is at risk for depression …

Sample quiz:

* Did you vote for John Kerry?
* Did you serve with John Kerry?
* Have you ever been married to John Kerry?
* Are you John Kerry?

That should cover it.

Posted by Tim B. on 04/17/2005 at 08:07 AM

*Did you ever lend your Magic Hat™ to John Kerry?
Posted by Mr. Bingley on 04/17 at 08:15 AM • permalink

“Have you ever been in Cambodia with John Kerry?”
Posted by jorgen on 04/17 at 08:41 AM • permalink

Are you aware that John Kerry still thinks he can be president?
I think that the problem is a lot more widespread than first believed….
Posted by Dr. Zoidberg on 04/17 at 08:49 AM • permalink

“Did you run the Boston marathon with John Kerry around 1980?”
Posted by jorgen on 04/17 at 08:50 AM • permalink

There is no magic wand. No one person is going to stand up and suddenly say it’s going to change tomorrow. You have to do that.
Sound advice for the depressed from John Kerry. It doesn’t literally make sense owing to a lack of antecedent for that but it’s good enough for most.
It’s from his forthcoming book Thoughts for Little People .
Posted by rhhardin on 04/17 at 08:58 AM • permalink

It is more likely called: Thoughts for People of Broader Commonality
Posted by jorgen on 04/17 at 09:25 AM • permalink

Did you spend 1,000 hours canvassing houses in Ohio begging people to vote for Kerry, being told up to the last second that your efforts bore fruit and Kerry would win, only to find out that Kerry lost, because of Ohio?
(from a snickering Bush voter in Ohio)
Posted by wronwright on 04/17 at 09:57 AM • permalink

Have you publicly communicated your depressed state by having yourself photographed with a compassionate head tilt™?
Posted by ErnieG on 04/17 at 10:10 AM • permalink

* Are you now, or have you ever been a member of, or in any way connected or associated with John Kerry, or ever knowingly aided or supported John Kerry directly, or indirectly through another organization, group or person, or ever advocated, taught, believed in, or knowingly supported or furthered the interests of John Kerry?
Posted by m on 04/17 at 10:28 AM • permalink

Shouldnt it be “of” not “for”? Or is it my grammar that sucks?
Posted by Nic White on 04/17 at 11:05 AM • permalink

Do people keep writing about John Kerry on your favorite blogs?
Posted by richard mcenroe on 04/17 at 11:23 AM • permalink

Have you since realized that John Kerry would have been an absolute frickin’ disaster as president?
Posted by RebeccaH on 04/17 at 01:00 PM • permalink