Cold place even colder

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Last updated on March 6th, 2018 at 12:31 am

Nearly 60 per cent of New Zealanders are concerned about global warming. Well, this should calm ‘em down:

Defying talk of global warming, New Zealanders shivered in December, with the capital Wellington recording its coldest start to the southern hemisphere summer for 78 years, according to official figures released Wednesday.

( Via Larry T.)

Posted by Tim B. on 01/03/2007 at 07:04 AM
    1. “Global warming?”

      Perhaps they should start talking about global cooling.

      Posted by The Best Infidel on 2007 01 03 at 07:11 AM • permalink


    1. But it wouldn’t matter to those psycho-greenies.

      They will still blame any weather screw-up on Bush.

      Posted by The Best Infidel on 2007 01 03 at 07:14 AM • permalink


    1. “Honestly officer, I was just cuddling this sheep to stop myself from freezing to death”.

      Posted by mr creosote on 2007 01 03 at 07:17 AM • permalink


    1. Officer: “I could comprehend that statement if I found you in a paddock, but sir, this is a nightclub”.

      “And that is one ugly sheep”.

      Posted by mr creosote on 2007 01 03 at 07:18 AM • permalink


    1. “Hey, bro.  You shood be shearing those sheep.”

      “No way, bro.  I’m not shearing with anyone!”

      Posted by anthony_r on 2007 01 03 at 07:22 AM • permalink


    1. Kiwi farmer walks into his bedroom holding a sheep.

      Looking at his wife in bed, he says,

      “I have a confession.  This is the pig I’ve been sleeping with.”

      The farmer’s wife says,

      “That’s not a pig, it’s a sheep!”

      To which the farmer retorts,

      “I wasn’t talking to you.”

      Posted by murph on 2007 01 03 at 07:25 AM • permalink


    1. Wellington recording its coldest start to the southern hemisphere summer for 78 years

      Well, duh… New Zealand signed Kyoto.

      Posted by splice on 2007 01 03 at 07:30 AM • permalink


    1. Kiwi and a Pom are walking home from a remote pub on the Canterbury plains.  It’s been a frustrating night as the bar was packed full of big hairy Kiwis (and a few blokes).

      As they pass a field, the Kiwi notices a ewe caught in a fence.  He says to the Pom,

      “Look mate.  I’m a bit frustrated at the moment, so turn your back while I have a go on this ewe, hey.”

      “Ok”, says the Pom, who turns his back and whistles, ignoring the grunts and baa-ing behind him.

      After a few minutes, the Pom hears a loud grunt, the sound of a zipper and feels a tap on the shoulder.

      “Hey cuz.  You can turn around now.  Thet’s not too bad hey!  Maybe you should have a go.”

      The Poms thinks for a moment, shrugs his shoulders, bends over, drops his pants and sticks his head through the fence.

      Posted by murph on 2007 01 03 at 07:34 AM • permalink


    1. I don’t know if it’s the right time to mention this, but lately I’ve had this recurring image of a sheep, up on a crutching cradle with its legs in the air… then suddenly pop-punk princess Pink appears, gazing at me with a fetching, come hither head tilt.

      Is this love? Is it wrong?

      Posted by splice on 2007 01 03 at 08:18 AM • permalink


    1. splice … are you thinking of a ewe or a ram … one will be love, the other wrong …

      Posted by Stevo on 2007 01 03 at 08:48 AM • permalink


    1. New Zilland and it’s people, shuvering in Dicimber – I blame Bush

      Posted by AlburyShifton on 2007 01 03 at 08:57 AM • permalink


    1. Two NZ sheep farmers are flying the mob to a new farm. Suddenly, the engine fails and the plane begins to fall quickly to the ground.
      SH1: “Quick! Grab a parachute and jump!”
      SH2: “What about the sheep ?!?”
      SH1: “Bugger the sheep !!!!”
      SH2: (pause) “Do you think we have time?”

      Posted by ErnieG on 2007 01 03 at 09:12 AM • permalink


    1. Asked a relative in New Zealand about how cold it was there. I happen to quip about global warming, his reply was, that it seems only lefties (greenies, hippies, Europeans et el) and the Australian media were worried about it, not to mention the ‘pinkos’ in Wellington. Curious to see what the old boy would do to the UN.

      Posted by BJM on 2007 01 03 at 09:13 AM • permalink


    1. Maybe they’ve been sending their celsiuses to Russia, not just their money.

      Posted by Paul Zrimsek on 2007 01 03 at 09:13 AM • permalink


    1. What’s the bet that right about now Iron Mike is sitting out on his balcony overlooking the Falls, sippin’ latte and eating his breakfast wheats. He’s probably peeling the plastic tube off his morning read – the Niagara Gazette – and mulesing musing about cheeky sheepherders and polar bears ‘n such.

      Posted by splice on 2007 01 03 at 09:15 AM • permalink


    1. #1 – They were talking about global cooling thirty years ago. I have a copy of Newsweek saying that we must consider pouring silt over the polar regions to melt icecaps to prevent the scourge of cooling.


      Posted by Ian Deans on 2007 01 03 at 09:24 AM • permalink


    1. #10: Stevo, ram or ewe… um, that’s a hard one. You know the story. “Click go the shears boys, click, click, click. Wide is his blow and his hands move quick”

      I think Pink might be a wether.

      Posted by splice on 2007 01 03 at 09:44 AM • permalink


    1. Al Gore spend December in New Zealand?

      Posted by rbj1 on 2007 01 03 at 09:51 AM • permalink


    1. Q.  Why do Kiwis make love to sheep on the edge of cliffs?

      A.  Because they push back harder.

      Posted by surfmaster on 2007 01 03 at 09:59 AM • permalink


    1. Its interesting, Tim, that you persist with this line of argument, given the frequency of opposing examples:

      Ice rinks not freezing in Scotland
      Ontario ski resorts lacking snow
      Bears not hibernating in Spain

      It seems pretty obvious that these kind of examples prove nothing for either side of the argument.  Can we please have something a little more scientific?

      Posted by sim on 2007 01 03 at 10:08 AM • permalink


    1. sim

      It’s not up to sceptics to disprove unprovable claims theories.

      Posted by murph on 2007 01 03 at 10:14 AM • permalink


    1. Let’s try that again


      It’s not up to sceptics to disprove unprovable theories…

      Posted by murph on 2007 01 03 at 10:15 AM • permalink


    1. LOL on one of the commercial channels this morning.
      The journo and his BOM expert were rabbiting on about Australia getting hotter and drier.
      As they spoke about all this hotness and dryness, they seemed unaware that some wit in the control room was broadcasting footage taken through a snow laden car windscreen.

      Posted by Skeeter on 2007 01 03 at 10:15 AM • permalink


    1. Thanks, sim, but we do understand the difference between anecdotes and evidence.  It’s just a bit of fun, is all.

      Posted by slammer on 2007 01 03 at 10:25 AM • permalink


    1. #20 sim

      You’re quite right that anecdotal evidence of that kind proves nothing. I suspect that few people here really think it does. On the other hand, it is exactly this sort of thing that is daily presented to us as evidence of global warming. That’s really the point of the joke. (That, and the tendency to present any weather event at all as evidence of the fact of climate change.)

      Posted by SteveGW on 2007 01 03 at 10:25 AM • permalink


    1. PS. Sheep jokes are not funny.

      Posted by SteveGW on 2007 01 03 at 10:26 AM • permalink


    1. #20: Sim, it’s okay. It’s not your fault or anybody else’s. That star you can see high in the midday sky… it’s running out of gas. It is entering the pre-clinical stages of its mortality. A period of expansion will be followed by a spectacular super nova, and then the collapse of its mass to a dull dwarf star even as the universe unfolds. It’s beautiful, isn’t it…

      Didn’t anybody tell you?

      Posted by splice on 2007 01 03 at 10:33 AM • permalink


    1. #20 sim
      If you want something more scientific I suggest you spend a few hours browsing this site.

      Posted by Skeeter on 2007 01 03 at 10:34 AM • permalink


    1. SteveGW

      Why?  Are you serious about sheep?

      Posted by murph on 2007 01 03 at 10:45 AM • permalink


    1. #26 Steve, does this mean we can’t tell you Billy Connelly’s anti-Australian sheep joke?

      Posted by Skeeter on 2007 01 03 at 10:47 AM • permalink


    1. SteveGW wrote:

      PS. Sheep jokes are not funny.

      They’re ba-a-a-a-d?

      Posted by Patrick Chester on 2007 01 03 at 11:24 AM • permalink


    1. Great.  I’m learning new jokes I can’t tell to anybody but Mr. H.

      Posted by RebeccaH on 2007 01 03 at 11:46 AM • permalink


    1. Re# 27: Correction; the Sun is considered too light to explode as a supernova. It is expected to expand to a red giant, swallowing the planetary solar system as it does, before collapsing into a white dwarf.

      Posted by splice on 2007 01 03 at 12:00 PM • permalink


    1. This is probably not funny, but I heard about a scene that took place in an Auckland courtroom. A woman was suing for divorce because she had caught her husband with a sheep. As she testified, she broke into sobs and said, “And then, and then, (sob) the sheep turned its head and kissed him right on the mouth!”

      The judge said, “Well, ma’am, a good one will do that.”

      Posted by ErnieG on 2007 01 03 at 12:23 PM • permalink


    1. “Feeling sheepish” has a whole different meaning to Kiwis.

      Posted by Mystery Meat on 2007 01 03 at 12:43 PM • permalink


    1. Can we please have something a little more scientific?

      That’s what we’ve been begging the warm-mongers for. All we get is “drowning polar bears”.

      Oh, and as has been pointed out, the burden of proof is on the doomscreamers.

      Posted by Dave S. on 2007 01 03 at 12:57 PM • permalink


    1. Taken from a climate change scare story in the media today. Someone interviewed from BoM – how can we trust them on complex weather systems when basic maths escape them:

      “In fact if we look at the 10 hottest years for Australia, 15 of those have occurred since 1980 and only two of those hottest years have occurred before 1950,” Mr Plummer said.

      Posted by boxofmatches on 2007 01 03 at 01:28 PM • permalink


    1. Hmmmm.

      Funny thing about that “drowning polar bears” meme.  I can’t find anybody who has actually seen a polar bear drowning.

      Posted by memomachine on 2007 01 03 at 01:34 PM • permalink


    1. Funny thing, we had a warmer than normal December here in New Englnd and the geniuses at Wesleyan’s meterology department claimed it as evidence of global warming. The fact that some Decembers past has been warmer makes no difference.

      This is the sort of thing we are having fun with.

      Posted by David A on 2007 01 03 at 02:12 PM • permalink


    1. Hi, sim, the Toronto Star (a liberal and Liberal rag written at a high school educational level) has a full page today on how global warming is going to destroy us all by 2050. Its lead-in on the front page is (roughly) ‘Think it’s warm now? Wait until 2050,’ using the anecdotal evidence of Toronto’s weather currently being about 4°C above normal as its “evidence” while ignoring the currently snowbound, freezing North American west and midwest; the well-below-average Antipodes’ summer; its own failed predictions of 2006 supposedly going to be the worst hurricane season in history because of global warming etc. That’s why the doomsayers are being so mocked here.

      If you want some scientific evidence of the variability of weather patterns for thousands of years, CO2 levels and climate, and the like, and not just tit-for-tat anecdotal evidence here meant to mock the mandmade global warmers, then go to and check out the links there.

      BTW, a few days ago Tim had a link to a couple of pro-global-warmers admitting that media screaming about the end of the world based on anecdotal evidence was leading to blowback doubting it all that was hurting the cause, especially from people like those of Denver, under several feet of snow, so the media should tone it down.

      Posted by andycanuck on 2007 01 03 at 02:20 PM • permalink


    1. Here’s a link to another blog featuring the same items and a bit more:

      P.S. If you’re out there, Wimpy Canadian, and not flying back from Oz or the like, Team Canada has made it into the gold medal game on Friday.

      Posted by andycanuck on 2007 01 03 at 02:28 PM • permalink


    1. I reckon the December temperature figures for the east coast of Australia must also be close to record lows, but have yet to see any reports…

      Posted by Margos Maid on 2007 01 03 at 05:23 PM • permalink


    1. Who re-railed this thread off the Kiwi jokes?

      Posted by Stop Continental Drift! on 2007 01 03 at 05:30 PM • permalink


    1. de-railed PIMF

      Posted by Stop Continental Drift! on 2007 01 03 at 05:31 PM • permalink


    1. The thing is, I actually believe that some of the increase in global temperatures is due to human factors.  It is just that the real global warming types never admit that global temperatures have changed in the past, that temperatures were warmer in early medival times, then got much colder starting about 1450, which ended about 1850, and things have been a bit warmer since.  Greenland actually was once greener, and the recent retreat of the glaciers there have been uncovering Norse-era settlements.

      Ice floes, huge ones, have been breaking off the polar ice and polar glaciers for centuries, leading to myths about floating islands out at sea, such as the St. Brednan’s Island story, or the reports by early polar explorers of land near the North Pole (which were probably huge ice floes that got reincorporated into the polar ice pack).

      Finally, by extending growing seasons, maybe a little global warming is a good idea, as it will increase food crops.

      Posted by Room 237 on 2007 01 03 at 05:54 PM • permalink


    1. On Enzed, I note the day after New Years Day is a public holiday called “The Day after New Years Day”.

      Good one, Bro.

      But why stop there?

      Posted by boxofmatches on 2007 01 03 at 07:36 PM • permalink


    1. #43 – To help get back on track

      Q: How do Kiwis find sheep in long grass?
      A: Delightful.

      Posted by AnthonyC on 2007 01 03 at 07:54 PM • permalink


    1. Funny thing about that “drowning polar bears” meme.  I can’t find anybody who has actually seen a polar bear drowning.

      Because the damned things swim like fish.

      Posted by Rob Crawford on 2007 01 03 at 08:11 PM • permalink


    1. #42, you’re right. Sydney had its coldest December for some time apparently.

      Posted by Art Vandelay on 2007 01 03 at 08:44 PM • permalink


    1. Aust hardest hit by climate change (abc 3/1/07)

      ‘The weather bureau’s Neil Plummer says there is nothing similar in recorded weather history.

      “Some of the climatic conditions we’ve seen in Australia were unprecedented in the records we’ve got. We’ve got records that go back to 1900,” he said.

      The year 2005 was the hottest year on record, and last year was not far behind.

      “So what we had in 2006 was the 11th warmest year and is consistent with a warming trend we had in Australia but in many other parts of the globe,” Mr Plummer said.’

      11th place not far behind first? and in weather records that date way back to 1900- that’s convincing.

      Posted by eeniemeenie on 2007 01 03 at 08:51 PM • permalink


    1. Here in Chicago, we’re having the pleasantest winter in many a year – highs in the 40s (if you’re fahrenheit-challenged, that’s around 5C).

      In a normal winter, we’d have ice and now everywhere, people would be suffering from frostbite, and shivering like crazy. And, more to the point, the homeless in their cardboard boxes along lower Wacker Drive would be freezing to death. This, in turn, would trigger a cascade of stories about how heartless the Bush Administration is or was or will be in cutting this or that program.

      Well, Bush has done something for the homeless: He’s made it warmer out! All by himself! (Well, OK, Cheney helped.)

      And do I hear leftards thanking him for helping the homeless? I do not!

      Talk about ingratitude. Bush should just turn down the cosmic thermostat (you know, the one he installed in the White House basement) and let the bastards freeze!

      Posted by Urbs in Horto on 2007 01 03 at 10:59 PM • permalink


    1. Some new [polar] bear necessities:

      Posted by andycanuck on 2007 01 04 at 12:58 AM • permalink


    1. I can’t find anybody who has actually seen a polar bear drowning.

      They were probably too mesmerized by the bears’ shrinking balls.

      Posted by PW on 2007 01 04 at 02:15 PM • permalink


    1. It’s another miserable winter day here where I’m at.

      As usual it’s right about at 68f. (for you foreign deevil types, that’s the temp that starts a body asking “light long sleeves or short sleeves today?”). Sunny, slightly breezy and unlimited visibility.

      Life here is hard. On the plus side, it does now get cool enough at night that the lawn quit growing so mowing is now only once a month instead of twice a week.

      Posted by Grimmy on 2007 01 04 at 05:31 PM • permalink


    1. Jinxed myself, I did.

      About an hour after I posted above, the sky clouded up, the temp dropped and it started raining in a windy, wettish kind of way.

      Purty day turned ugly. I bet y’all foreigners had something to do with that.

      Posted by Grimmy on 2007 01 04 at 10:32 PM • permalink


    1. I live in New England too. I am having some work done on the house, and I am not kidding to report, the carpenter, who has been very glad of the mild weather, averred that it was “a shame that the polar bears were going to drown.” He was serious.

      Posted by moptop on 2007 01 05 at 09:54 AM • permalink


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