Be reasonable, man

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Last updated on July 27th, 2017 at 12:09 pm

That last one is a total deal-breaker:

Osama bin Laden wants the United States to convert to Islam, ditch its constitution, abolish banks, jail homosexuals, bar women from appearing in the press and sign the Kyoto climate change treaty.

 

Posted by Tim B. on 11/17/2005 at 01:28 PM
    1. Guy thinks debauchery and drinking are two different things. Probably doesn’t even know about beer farts.

      Loser.

      Posted by Gary from Jersey on 2005 11 17 at 02:43 PM • permalink

 

    1. How about we just kill you, Osama, and remove half of the objections?

      Posted by SoberHT on 2005 11 17 at 03:24 PM • permalink

 

    1. So Osama’s a granola-eating, birkenstock-wearing, smelly tree hugger!? Who’da guessed?

      Posted by tim maguire on 2005 11 17 at 03:41 PM • permalink

 

    1. Well, he’s got two out of four right, so that ain’t bad.

      Posted by Arnie on 2005 11 17 at 03:56 PM • permalink

 

    1. Only two out of those six demands might be objectionable to the Left; I’m sure they’re able to reach a deal that all sides can live with.

      /sarcasm

      BTW, “abolish banks” is code for “exterminate all those money-grubbing Jooooos”, no?

      Posted by PW on 2005 11 17 at 04:07 PM • permalink

 

    1. bar women from appearing in the press

      You’ll pry my page three girl out of my cold dead hands, you bugger.

      Posted by Quentin George on 2005 11 17 at 04:10 PM • permalink

 

    1. For Nora:
      learned bugger might be graduate of the Sorbumme?

      Posted by blogstrop on 2005 11 17 at 04:20 PM • permalink

 

    1. “[Fidel Castro] wants the United States to…ditch its constitution, abolish banks, jail homosexuals…and sign the Kyoto climate change treaty.”

      Posted by TimShell on 2005 11 17 at 04:23 PM • permalink

 

    1. Quentin, I’m certain that is exactly what Binny has in mind.

      ;^)

      Posted by Spiny Norman on 2005 11 17 at 04:42 PM • permalink

 

    1. My recollection is that the US has actually signed the Kyoto Protocol. It just hasn’t ratified it.

      ;^) Evil Clinton!

      Posted by Paul on 2005 11 17 at 04:54 PM • permalink

 

    1. What about Noordin Top? He wants us to vote for Kim Beazley!

      Posted by Oafish and Infantile on 2005 11 17 at 04:56 PM • permalink

 

    1. 3. byrd, I can cope with tree-huggers (from a distance), but screaming nutjobs who intend to take over the world and turn me into the property of any fellow that decides he’s my owner needs to stay a long way away from me.

      Slightly OT- I’ve made an executive decision. Henceforth, the world is now divided into Infidels and Non-Infidels. Afte all, the ‘non-’ prefix carries negative connotations, and I’m damned proud of being an infidel.

      Posted by Nilknarf Arbed on 2005 11 17 at 05:05 PM • permalink

 

    1. Oh, so tree huggers are ok, but screaming nut jobs who intend to take over the world are not? Picky picky.

      Posted by tim maguire on 2005 11 17 at 05:10 PM • permalink

 

    1. My recollection is that the US has actually signed the Kyoto Protocol. It just hasn’t ratified it.

      My recollection is less complete than that, but it does include the part where the Senate voted it down 99-0.  Only thing that makes that funny enough to remember is that *Senator* John Kerry took part in that vote, which is why Kyoto never became an issue in the 2005 prex-election.
      I don’t remember, even now, whether Clinton signed the stupid thing or not, although I was sure that, once I’d typed my way this far down the page, that memory would have sparked back up by now.  But apparently not.  Oh never mind.

      Posted by Stoop Davy Dave on 2005 11 17 at 05:16 PM • permalink

 

    1. I would have thought that closing down bars would have been the deal breaker, myself.  ;-P

      As for the banks…..more likely, Binny wants to revert to bartering, with precious metals returning as direct negotiables, except when issued as specie by local rulers.

      As I understand matters (yeah, I might be wrong, and thus am going out on a limb), a commonly accepted monetary system permits anyone to earn money, and also eases trade barriers.  Abolishing banks would put economic control into the hands of local or regional governments, and force people to live for daily wages (no banks, no saving accounts).  Sounds like the seventh century to me, right enough.

      Getting rid of banks controlled by JOOOOOSSSS is merely icing on the cake to Binny.

      Posted by The_Real_JeffS on 2005 11 17 at 05:16 PM • permalink

 

    1. Clinton did sign the Kyoto treaty.  The Senate threw it out, and Bush refused to push it again…..which is why the swampies hate him (amongst other reasons).

      Posted by The_Real_JeffS on 2005 11 17 at 05:18 PM • permalink

 

    1. Wasn’t it Al “Deadwood” Gore who signed?

      Cock-sucker!…

      Posted by mojo on 2005 11 17 at 05:26 PM • permalink

 

    1. Smoke from the WTC impact fires would’ve put us over Kyoto emissions limits, if we’d been subscribers.

      And one way to rectify that would have been transfer payments to a developing nation, say, Afghanistan.

      Clever bugger wants to play us both ways….

      Posted by Rittenhouse on 2005 11 17 at 05:37 PM • permalink

 

    1. I think Big Wooden Al (of course he’s a tree-hugger—it’s like hugging your mama) ‘accepted’ the Treaty (and maybe Clinton signed it), but the Treaty itself never got voted on by the Senate.  The Senate voted 96-0 to not even consider the darned thing.  (I don’t know who the 4 non-voters were and I’m way too lazy to look it up.)

      Posted by JorgXMcKie on 2005 11 17 at 06:35 PM • permalink

 

    1. Religion of the Prophets = death cult

      what do they do for amusement when everyone’s converted?

      Oh, I know, kill eachother.

      Posted by kae on 2005 11 17 at 06:38 PM • permalink

 

    1. what, no banks! How the hell am i going to get my money out, late at night on a bender on my way to the strippers?

      Posted by JSthecorrect on 2005 11 17 at 06:39 PM • permalink

 

    1. but screaming nutjobs who intend to take over the world and turn me into the property of any fellow that decides he’s my owner needs to stay a long way away from me.

      Hater.

      Posted by Achillea on 2005 11 17 at 07:08 PM • permalink

 

    1. No banks = no usury, a sin according to fundie nutjobs. No interest on money means that savings and loans relt on bakseesh (think thats spelt right) a system of patronage and “considerations” instead.
      Otherwise known as complete corruption.

      Posted by thefrollickingmole on 2005 11 17 at 07:10 PM • permalink

 

    1. pimf rely

      Posted by thefrollickingmole on 2005 11 17 at 07:12 PM • permalink

 

    1. Google is your friend, sometimes.

      The vote (on Kyoto, or rather on whether or not to consider Kyoto) was 95-0. Here is the full text of Senate Resolution 98.

      The Senate page on the resolution lists Senators by how they voted. Not voting:
      Bryan (D-NV)
      Feinstein (D-CA)
      Grams (R-MN)
      Harkin (D-IA)
      Reid (D-NV)

      Nobody voted against it.

      Regards,
      Ric

      Posted by Ric Locke on 2005 11 17 at 07:27 PM • permalink

 

    1. So Osama is one of the finest prose writers in Arabic? The Nobel Prize for literature can’t be far off, then.  And I hear Hitler was a fine watercolourist, but I don’t suppose Verso will be publishing his collected artworks anytime soon.

      Posted by cuckoo on 2005 11 17 at 07:32 PM • permalink

 

    1. Not often I agree with Osama but he may be onto something about getting rid of banks

      Posted by cjblair on 2005 11 17 at 07:42 PM • permalink

 

    1. RebeccaH wants Osama bin Laden to convert to civilized behavior, ditch his quest for world domination, abolish jihad, legally try and execute serial killers like al-Zarqawi, bar Muslim men from tyrannizing their women, and give himself up to the authorities of any country but France.  Do all that, Binny, and we’ll talk.

      Posted by RebeccaH on 2005 11 17 at 07:44 PM • permalink

 

    1. 22. Achillea, let me rephrase then,

      For those proposing the changeover of dar al harb to dar al islam, I may take exception to the idea of losing all my current rights and privileges as a woman living in a secular society.

      As a result of that, I may also take action of an unexpected nature, and those who come too close are likely to discover this to their detriment.
      Is that better?

      Posted by Nilknarf Arbed on 2005 11 17 at 07:44 PM • permalink

 

    1. So Osama is one of the finest prose writers in Arabic?

      Yes. That’s like being one of the tallest midgets in the world.

      Posted by ErnieG on 2005 11 17 at 07:52 PM • permalink

 

    1. PW: “BTW, “abolish banks” is code for “exterminate all those money-grubbing Jooooos”, no? “

      Actually it means abolish banks, I’m sure. Islam forbids charging interest for a loan. Kinda hard to have a bank without doing that.

      Posted by Bostonian on 2005 11 17 at 08:04 PM • permalink

 

    1. from the SMH:

      The NSW Premier, Morris Iemma, provided a reference in 1999 to a man who became a close associate of alleged terrorist Willy Brigitte and is the brother-in-law of a terrorism suspect arrested last week…

      …Sources in the Muslim community said Mr Iemma’s former staff member, Mamdouh Habib’s current lawyer Stephen Hopper, wrote letters of reference that Mr Iemma would sign in his Lakemba electorate.

      Posted by monaro on 2005 11 17 at 08:04 PM • permalink

 

    1. Re: #23, I think that “bakseesh” is spelled “bakeesh”.  I believe that the closest Western equivalent is “bribe” or “pay off”.

      However, “complete corruption” pretty much describes the situation, though.  US military personnel don’t get shaken down (much anywho, I never was), but contractors, hoo doggie!

      Posted by The_Real_JeffS on 2005 11 17 at 08:06 PM • permalink

 

    1. Disappointingly, the compendium leaves up in the air how bin Laden feels about tort reform.

      Posted by zeppenwolf on 2005 11 17 at 08:18 PM • permalink

 

    1. “Baksheesh” is the common English spelling for an Arabic word where the “K” is a sort of throat clearing sound.

      You have that meaning down precisely. Everyone from hotel maids to traffic cops shout the word at Westerners, usually accompanied by a scowl and an outsretched hand.

      Posted by Pedro the Ignorant on 2005 11 17 at 08:24 PM • permalink

 

    1. So I take it binny is going to convert Saudi Arabia and Iraq to a giant Solar Farm once the populaces of those two countries see sense and give him the keys ( sorry reins – there won’t be any cars).
      And here was me thinking the terrorists attacks on Iraq’s oil infrastructure were to disrupt the economy creating the political climate for an overthrow.
      Under Bin Laden the Minister for Transport will be known as Minister for Donkeys and Asses

      Posted by the nailgun on 2005 11 17 at 08:49 PM • permalink

 

    1. Next time greenies give a list of “eminent people/scientists” in support of Kyoto we must ensure they don’t forget the supporter with the highest international profile of all – Bin Laden and he has crediblity as he is a trained engineer if I remember correctly

      Posted by the nailgun on 2005 11 17 at 08:53 PM • permalink

 

    1. ’ … and sign the Kyoto climate change treaty.’

      A little tokenism for his apologists in the West.

      Posted by Inurbanus on 2005 11 17 at 08:58 PM • permalink

 

    1. Binny wants us all to live in caves.  Yeh, right, Osama, after you already got dibs on the best ones.

      Posted by Brett_McS on 2005 11 17 at 09:06 PM • permalink

 

    1. OK.  Where the HELL do you find a tree to hug in Afghanistan?

      Posted by richard mcenroe on 2005 11 17 at 09:07 PM • permalink

 

    1. #32 Monaro.I was particularly impressed by the description in the Iemma letter of the terrorist associate as a “sincere and gentile man”.One might be inclined to pass it off as a typo but given the authorship of the letter maybe not.

      Posted by Lew on 2005 11 17 at 09:11 PM • permalink

 

    1. I was curious about the prohibition on interest, and the fact that Muslims buy houses and cars, apparently without having to pay cash on the barrelhead. I ran a Google search on the plain-text inquiry How can a muslim finance a car? and learned that Islamic banks make no-interest, sharia-compliant loans by various means. These usually involve elaborate “partnership agreements” or “rent-to-buy” plans. Funnily enough, the math looks awfully like standard installment interest. It’s not, though, because the word “interest” is never used, and an imam has signed off on it.

      Posted by ErnieG on 2005 11 17 at 09:15 PM • permalink

 

    1. # 40

      hug a date palm?

      um, if we abolish the banks do I get to keep my house I only owe $40oddK on?

      Posted by kae on 2005 11 17 at 09:17 PM • permalink

 

    1. The thing about Osama is, he isn’t as nice as he looks…

      If he wasn’t so pretty I would think it was Margo in disguise.

      Posted by Flying Giraffe on 2005 11 17 at 09:21 PM • permalink

 

    1. I suppose the tax tithe paid by converted unbelievers will pay the welfare of the non-infidels who are currently in receipt of government largesse? Surely all unbelievers can’t be killed, who will support the social security/disability pensions of the people who so need this support while they pursue other agendas (visiting Pakistan to scope Islamic schools for the kiddies comes to mind).

      Posted by kae on 2005 11 17 at 09:22 PM • permalink

 

    1. # 42 I was curious about the prohibition on interest, and the fact that Muslims buy houses and cars, apparently without having to pay cash on the barrelhead. I ran a Google search on the plain-text inquiry How can a muslim finance a car? and learned that Islamic banks make no-interest, sharia-compliant loans by various means. These usually involve elaborate “partnership agreements” or “rent-to-buy” plans. Funnily enough, the math looks awfully like standard installment interest. It’s not, though, because the word “interest” is never used, and an imam has signed off on it.

      You’re pretty much on the money. I once implemented a credit card processing system for an Australian bank in Pakistan, and the way we got around “Islamic banking” laws was to delete all references to “interest” and replace them with “credit fees”.

      Likewise, interest paid on deposit accounts was called “profit”.

      Posted by Oafish and Infantile on 2005 11 17 at 10:19 PM • permalink

 

    1. #42 which is why osama wants to get rid of banks, as the molsem proles have found a way around the ‘interest’ problem, which is really interest in all but name.  Hence it is offensive to Osama.  As he regards such practices as incentives to apostatise, like pretty much all of western based culture, he hates it, hates it, my precious.

      Posted by entropy on 2005 11 17 at 10:27 PM • permalink

 

    1. # 42 # 46

      hmmm
      so pulling the wool over gods eyes is just a matter of a simple “Cut and Paste” ?

      I knew Bill Gates was the devil!!

      Posted by knuckleheadwatch on 2005 11 17 at 10:37 PM • permalink

 

    1. Why bother with the Kyoto Protocol?

      All the other progressive measures will rip the guts out of the economy anyway; emissions will plummet, except for emissions from those Donkeys.

      Doesn’t Beer production equal 58.75% of US GDP?

      Posted by Looneyc on 2005 11 17 at 10:39 PM • permalink

 

    1. “delete all references to “interest” and replace them with “credit fees”.

      Likewise, interest paid on deposit accounts was called “profit”.

      That means women can appear in magazines, we’ll just call them space aliens!

      Posted by Syl on 2005 11 17 at 10:40 PM • permalink

 

    1. Well, women are from Venus.

      Posted by Andrea Harris, Administrator on 2005 11 17 at 10:58 PM • permalink

 

    1. #7
      LOL

      Perhaps the Sorbumme has an outreach campus in San Francisco?

      —Nora

      Posted by The Thin Man Returns on 2005 11 17 at 11:10 PM • permalink

 

    1. What a cool concept! Can the same be done with Christianity? OK, so I’m going to change “adultery” to “abstinence from having sex with college girls”:

      “Thou shalt not commit [abstinence from having sex with college girls]”

      Whoa! Now religion rocks! Thanks for the tip, Islam!

      Posted by Dave S. on 2005 11 17 at 11:15 PM • permalink

 

    1. It wasn’t that long ago that usury was illegal in Christian Europe, too.

      A number of bank products have been set up to allow pious Muslims to effectly borrow at interest in everything but the word. I believe it works a little something like this – the bank calculates the total amount of the loan by adding the aggregate interest to the principal, splits the total up equally over the life of the loan (*ahem* whatever they call it) and calls these chunks “rental payments” or something innocuous like that. Nice delusions these fundie Muslims have got going there.

      Posted by James Waterton on 2005 11 17 at 11:31 PM • permalink

 

    1. Nah Dave, you got it backwards. You are still forbidden from committing adultery. However, that does not mean that you are forbidden from promiscuous sex, as that phrase does not include the word “adultery” anywhere. Prohibitions against murder can also be circumvented in a similar manner, as you no longer say “murder” but instead “artificially induce death.”

      Posted by JSchuler on 2005 11 17 at 11:37 PM • permalink

 

    1. #52, Nora

      They have. I teach there.

      Posted by ekw on 2005 11 17 at 11:46 PM • permalink

 

    1. #50 “delete all references to “interest” and replace them with “credit fees”.

      Likewise, interest paid on deposit accounts was called “profit”.

      That means women can appear in magazines, we’ll just call them space aliens!

      Dude, you don’t know the half of it. While I was over in Pakistan, I found a British motorbike magazine in the hotel lobby newstand. Brit bike mags are full of scantily-clad girlies propped on bikes, and what with Pakistan being a muslim country, the censors had been through the magazine. Some imam had been throughn the entire magazine with a thick black felt marker going over every uncovered breast, hint of nipple, lacey lingerie and so on.

      Can you imagine getting that sort of gig in Pakistan? First you get to salivate and wank all over decadent western magazines, then righteously cover up the good bits in the name of Allah.

      Posted by Oafish and Infantile on 2005 11 17 at 11:56 PM • permalink

 

    1. Imagine the level of frustration and sexual perversion in dar al Islam. Oh, yeah, I forgot. You don’t have to imagine it. It’s called torture, rape, and mass murder.

      My bad.

      Posted by ekw on 2005 11 18 at 12:07 AM • permalink

 

    1. Speaking of frustration . . . .

      To get a drink (i.e. alcohol) in Pakistan, you had to register with the government as a foreign non-muslim alcoholic. That way, a muslim barman in an international hotel could serve you alcohol with a clear conscience because (a) an act of mercy overrides the srtict prohibition, and (b) you have a piece of paper from the government.

      Frankly, I’m not much of a drinker, and I couldn’t be fagged going through all that effort just for an alcoholic drink.

      Posted by Oafish and Infantile on 2005 11 18 at 12:26 AM • permalink

 

    1. 58 ekw

      And the goats. Don’t forget the goats. Not to mention the temporary marriages, followed by “I divorce thee” said three times. And leave the money on the dresser.

      Posted by ErnieG on 2005 11 18 at 12:31 AM • permalink

 

    1. With that list of demands how come OBL didn’t insist that Collingwood win a few more premierships?

      Posted by SwinishCapitalist on 2005 11 18 at 12:34 AM • permalink

 

    1. Vodka in Evian bottles?

      Posted by Brett_McS on 2005 11 18 at 12:35 AM • permalink

 

    1. 47 entropy

      Not all Muslims are comfortable with these banking practices. In one of the links I found, a businessman is quoted as saying, “They’re selling pork and calling it beef.”

      Posted by ErnieG on 2005 11 18 at 12:36 AM • permalink

 

    1. #57 I can see senator Faulkner ALP doing that job in his former star chamber….

      Posted by crash on 2005 11 18 at 01:09 AM • permalink

 

    1. …bar women from appearing in the press

      For a moment I thought he might be on to something there. Then I realized that would abolish the sports Illustrated swimsuit issue, wouldn’t it!

      Let’s just compromise and get rid of the sideline reporter bimbos during Monday Night Football.

      Posted by Supercat on 2005 11 18 at 01:13 AM • permalink

 

    1. The terrorist responsible for killing 3000 civilians in September 2001 is one of the best prose writers in Arabic.

      A triumph of style over substance.

      Posted by Inurbanus on 2005 11 18 at 01:33 AM • permalink

 

    1. #61- because these are demands, not prayers!

      Posted by JSthecorrect on 2005 11 18 at 01:38 AM • permalink

 

    1. #61 SwinishCapitalist ,

      Be reasonable:
      Islamic state, tick
      Sharia Law, tick
      Scrapping the constitution, tick
      Collingwood winning another premiership? Hey. Osama may be evil, though he ain’t god you know. Cross.

      Posted by Nic on 2005 11 18 at 01:39 AM • permalink

 

    1. How do you think I’d go if I set up bank with slogans like “get your interest free home loans here” and just in fine print bank fees $50,000. ACCC might have a go at being “misleading and deceptive” but if I set bank up in Victoria should be able to counter sue for religious vilifaction or something. Would have to scrap the “piggy banks” for the kiddies of course but could substitute “goatie banks” and when it is full you take to bank and slit its throat and out comes the money.

      Posted by the nailgun on 2005 11 18 at 02:21 AM • permalink

 

    1. Nail gun, I think you’re on to something. I’ve found the bank’s mascot.

      The positioning statement can be “User-us Not Usary”

      You can have all sorts of special features like jihad cheque books, caliphate credit cards and keep a bank balance over $20,000 and your second wife is FREE.

      —Nora

      Posted by The Thin Man Returns on 2005 11 18 at 02:33 AM • permalink

 

    1. I would have to have one rule though. Just as you have to take off your motor bike helmet before entering a bank for security reasons all the good looking muslim sheilas would have to take off those all over Burkhas.

      Posted by the nailgun on 2005 11 18 at 02:42 AM • permalink

 

    1. Supercat — Or have the sideline bimbos interviewing the players in Bikinis…

      Posted by richard mcenroe on 2005 11 18 at 03:18 AM • permalink

 

    1. But Richard McE, who would want to see those barkers in bikinis anyway?  Shit, your average Hooters waitress probably knows more about football than those ABC/ESPN/FOX/CBS affirmative action hires do.

      Posted by David Crawford on 2005 11 18 at 04:46 AM • permalink

 

    1. Call me old fashioned but…I’m not passing judgement on Usama until I know his views on abortion and whether he thinks the ‘morning after’ pill is ‘Haram’ for rural Australian women.

      Posted by Lucky Nutsacks on 2005 11 18 at 05:16 AM • permalink

 

    1. #74 Tony Abbot just got taken out then,Deo Vindice…Agreed.

      Posted by crash on 2005 11 18 at 05:25 AM • permalink

 

    1. Osamas main gripe is that the wealthy     (Osamas got how much?), can no longer count on “favours” for financing peoples houses, cars ect.
      Want to make a bet most of the richest (before petro dollars came in) were either clerics or sheiks?
      Banks (parasites they may be, but nice ones) weaken their hold on people. Plus how many 13 year old beautiful virgins do you think have “discharged” the favours owed by families?

      Posted by thefrollickingmole on 2005 11 18 at 05:43 AM • permalink

 

    1. The morning-after pill is Mushtabahat until we can bribe someone to say it’s Halal.

      Know any compliant mullahs?

      Posted by ekw on 2005 11 18 at 05:45 AM • permalink

 

    1. Although the United States signed the Kyoto Protocol, the treaty has not been ratified by the U.S. Senate. In July 1999, the United States Senate voted 95-0 to pass a resolution co-sponsored by Sen. Byrd (D-W.Va.) and Sen. Hagel (R-Neb.), which stated the Senate would not ratify the Protocol unless rapidly developing countries such as China were included in its requirements to reduce greenhouse gases. The Clinton Administration announced it would not send the treaty to the Senate for ratification.
      link

      Posted by zefal on 2005 11 18 at 05:54 AM • permalink

 

    1. Clinton signed it, and it was a democrat controlled Senate in 1998 that unanimously rejected Kyoto. They were happy to have Bush elected in 2000 so they could blame him.

      Posted by Abu Qa’Qa on 2005 11 18 at 08:27 AM • permalink

 

    1. o/t Just saw the most cringeingly(new word) EMBARASSING programme I think I’ve ever witnessed-the “grand final” of ABC’S Strictly Dancing. Supposedly a competition with credible standards,it has now degenerated into a programme in which two men are a couple.They tangoed and jived and waggled and pouted and curtsied and embraced and lifted each other just like the hetero couples-who must surely have thought they were in a mad house.The rejected competitors from past episodes must have been very unhappy with the system.
      O.K nothing against gay couples doing whatever they like together but I don’t want to watch two men doing ballroom dancing in a supposedly unrigged competition.ABC has now run mad and lost all credibility for me.Fair Dinkum.
      Leprechaun McDermott fiddled and diddled and
      pranced and paraded about,happy with his stupid charade and that he got away with it.
      Second worst aspect of it – our taxpayer dollars were wheeled out to finance it.Worst aspect-the programme will be forced on the people of Asia Pacific as an example of what Australians like to watch on THEIR ABC….

      Posted by crash on 2005 11 18 at 10:14 AM • permalink

 

    1. #72 richard mcenroe –

      Or have the sideline bimbos interviewing the players in bikinis.

      Didn’t the XFL do that?

      They should have.

      Posted by Rittenhouse on 2005 11 18 at 10:32 AM • permalink

 

    1. SBS news tonight Mary of the pencilled in eyebrows listed Bush “war of words”escalated,Polls in U.S. say 64% of people against the Iraq war-Abu Graeb,did the foreign minister Downer fail to inform Mr Howard about the Vietnamese/Australian Nguyen’s execution date(God help the young man),Ms Alvarez and our vicious immigration system,the Socialists in Sri Lanka winning the election being a boost for Tamil Tigers,Kofi and entourage descending on earthquake areas in Pakistan for an emergency “donor’s conference”,Nazi sympathiser Irving thrown out of Austria,Media magnate Conrad Black fraudulent,Ms Leslie’s impending release in Bali,Clarke rape,I.R. laws,Inuit Climate Change ruining their hunting culture————
      and to finish a nice selection of rioters at Anti Apec protest,knocking down and smashing a “statue of Liberty” and a paper machier “statue of Bush” being stabbed with “spears” by protesters.Nice OUR SBS.

      Posted by crash on 2005 11 18 at 10:32 AM • permalink

 

    1. mojo 17

      Wasn’t it Al “Deadwood” Gore who signed?

      In 1999 A”D”G was presiding over the senate while it was voting down Kyoto 99-0.  If it had been a tie, he as VP would have had a chance to vote on it, but as things worked out, no.

      Posted by Stoop Davy Dave on 2005 11 18 at 10:33 AM • permalink

 

    1. Rittenhouse—Mind you, getting Jerome Bettis into a Bikini, not easy…

      Posted by richard mcenroe on 2005 11 18 at 10:52 AM • permalink

 

    1. OT- You’re gonna love professor bunyip’s roasting of smh’s Julia Baird.

      Posted by slammer on 2005 11 18 at 10:56 AM • permalink

 

    1. SL O/T David Hicks request for Brit Citizenship DENIED. Hicks’ lawyer will challenge…

      Posted by crash on 2005 11 18 at 11:04 AM • permalink

 

    1. o/t Drug Advisory Council of Australia says we have the highest number of Marijuana users per head of population in the Western World….Oz.

      Posted by crash on 2005 11 18 at 11:17 AM • permalink

 

    1. Truly makes one proud.

      Posted by Olrence on 2005 11 18 at 11:24 AM • permalink

 

    1. Is there no end to our achievements when we set our minds to it?

      Posted by Olrence on 2005 11 18 at 11:25 AM • permalink

 

    1. Well, I’m off to Evil’s place.

      Posted by Olrence on 2005 11 18 at 11:27 AM • permalink

 

    1. OK, now I’m back.

      Posted by Olrence on 2005 11 18 at 11:35 AM • permalink

 

    1. o/t “Peace Activist” and Author Kurt Vonnegut has praised suicide bombers and used drug culture slang to describe the “amazing high” that the bombers must feel…

      Posted by crash on 2005 11 18 at 11:39 AM • permalink

 

    1. Well, that’s the thing.  Parts of ‘em’ll be high at the same moment other parts of em’ll be mashed into the dirt.  A fairly short-lived sensation, you’d think.

      Posted by Olrence on 2005 11 18 at 11:43 AM • permalink

 

    1. “Peace Activist” and Author Kurt Vonnegut has praised suicide bombers and used drug culture slang to describe the “amazing high” that the bombers must feel…

      I have no problem with people expressing their reservations and dissent with decisions and actions by the government.  I do have a problem with people whose statements and actions encourage terrorists to continue their campaign of terror, murder, and mayhem.

      Question #1:  If peace activists encourage terrorists to continue their acts of depravity, are they not themselves part of the root causes for terrorism?

      Question #2:  If peace activists are indeed part of the root causes, when they shout out that we need to consider the root causes, wouldn’t be appropriate for me to simply point my finger back to them and shout “IT’S YOU!” ?

      Posted by wronwright on 2005 11 18 at 12:00 PM • permalink

 

    1. I reckon you’re wright, wron.  Clearly the balaklava’d pronouncements are playing to
      a sympathetic audience that they hope will sway the mainstream.  Fat chance.

      Posted by Olrence on 2005 11 18 at 12:07 PM • permalink

 

    1. stoop 83

      I thought Al went to Kyoto for the actual (symbolic) signing ceremony, and signed on behalf of Billy. Al was sorta running for something at the time, but I can’t quite remember what…

      Posted by mojo on 2005 11 18 at 01:03 PM • permalink

 

    1. Al was vice president.  So he got a vote in the senate, only, and only to break ties.  95-0 ain’t a tie, so he didn’t vote on this one.  Non-binding signatures on unratified treaties ain’t squat.

      Posted by Stoop Davy Dave on 2005 11 18 at 04:01 PM • permalink

 

    1. This is great!  I’ve decided to write a play based on the words of OBL.  It will be a comedy similar in feel to the The Producers.

      Cocktails will be served in the lobby prior to each performance.

      Posted by Keith on 2005 11 18 at 04:09 PM • permalink

 

    1. crash, since when have ‘Everyone’s ABC’ had any read credibility? It’s been yonks!

      And I’m with Wron – I think he’s onto something.

      Posted by Nilknarf Arbed on 2005 11 18 at 04:41 PM • permalink

 

    1. #94 wronwright

      Question #1:  If peace activists encourage terrorists to continue their acts of depravity, are they not themselves part of the root causes for terrorism?

      Maybe, but one thing it certainly does is abrogate any claims to “peace” activism, proving once and for all, they are not “anti-war”, they’re just on the other side.

      Posted by Spiny Norman on 2005 11 18 at 04:59 PM • permalink

 

    1. #62 “Vodka in Evian bottles?”

      Potato Water.

      Or as Frogsylvanians might say: L’Eau De Pomme de terre.

      Personally I prefer Freedom Water

      Posted by monkeyfan on 2005 11 18 at 04:59 PM • permalink

 

    1. #82
      So, they forgot to mention the mystery planes ferrying innocent suspects in and out of compliant running-dog countries?
      The self delusion of so many commentators is manifest in their belief that you can fight deadly anarchy with sweet reason.
      A good example is the attempts being made to derail the fair trial of Saddam. Whose interests are being served?
      A fair trial would be a beacon for the new democracy and the rule of law. It will be undermined by whatever means necessary, even if that is the murder of Saddam’s defence team, or their resignation.
      For him, surviving is victory.
      The survival of Western Democracy and the rule of law will not, in the end depend on scrupulous observance of the propriety of those rules to the exclusion of any forceful actions.
      Human rights and civil liberties are a peace-time luxury. They have no role to play in deadly combat.
      If you cannot counter bastardry with an effective counter force, you are not in the game.
      The real test of the resolve and resilience of the west is yet to come.
      Iraq has illustrated the depth of dysfuctionality of itself and all the peripheral states. Iran’s rulers seem intent on a further lurch to the dark side. Syria appears to be a dimwitted but somewhat dangerous bit player. The Saudis continue to live in an unreal world, where unlimited income can be farmed out to proxy proselytising players worldwide. Jordan wants us all to forget that it took the largest chunk of Palestine. Turkey’s commitment to secular democracy may be tested again, with islamists resentful to this day that Ataturk reformed the caliphate out of existence.
      The toxic cultural accretions of centuries in the Middle east will not be swept away by sweet reason alone.

      Posted by blogstrop on 2005 11 18 at 05:11 PM • permalink

 

    1. Here are my thoughts:  I think you folks are still punch drunk (or, hungover) after Tim’s absence, the sacking of Tim’s house and drinking of his beer, and Andreas’s coup.  It shows.  Or, perhaps you are still just plain drunk.  At any rate, carry on.  Too entertaining to stop.

      Posted by Kathy from Austin on 2005 11 18 at 09:08 PM • permalink

 

    1. Call this a thread.  Not one vaguely pornographic reference to Japanese rubber suit monster movies…

      Posted by richard mcenroe on 2005 11 18 at 09:23 PM • permalink

 

    1. Richard, I never realised that there was a pornographic element to Gamera, or Mothra, or, of course, Godzilla.

      As for the Overfiend (no good at the Japanese name), that’s anime, so it’s a given that it has pornographic elements to it.

      Posted by Nilknarf Arbed on 2005 11 18 at 10:24 PM • permalink

 

    1. Funny you should mention that, richard mcenroe, cuz I just finished watching Godzilla Does Tokyo.

      Posted by RebeccaH on 2005 11 18 at 11:14 PM • permalink

 

    1. #103 Kathy from Austin

      Or, perhaps you are still just plain drunk.

      Hey now. I desemble resemble resent that remark…

      Posted by Spiny Norman on 2005 11 18 at 11:16 PM • permalink

 

    1. Kathy from Austin,

      There was NO BEER when I got there.  In addition, there was NO CHICKEN WINGS (lot’s of bones though), NO PIZZA, NO COLD CUTS, NO POTATO CHIPS, nothing.  RebeccaH suggested I just hang out and enjoy the spiritual harmony but I said shit on that, I came for the Victoria brews.  I want nothing to do with being in harmony with Stoop Davy Dave, Richard McEnroe, or PW.  And when they started singing John Howard campaign songs, swaying to the harmony, well, that’s when I left.

      Word of advice: If you ever go to Tim Blair’s house for an impromptu party, bring your own beer and food and keep it in your car.  And don’t let anyone know.  If you ever tell anyone you have it, they will storm your car like the rabble stormed the Bastile, drink your beer, eat your food, and then torch your car afterwards while yelling “Allah Akbar” between giggles.

      If you don’t believe me, ask poor Hamish.  I hope he at least got paid for the pizzas he delivered.

      Posted by wronwright on 2005 11 19 at 12:06 AM • permalink

 

    1. nilknarf arbed—Overfiend (urotsukidoji) is a tentacle porn classic, first series at least.  Second is a bit of a disappointment.  LA Blue Girl is funnier though, because of the horny dwarf ninja.  Twin Angels/Twin Dolls has the same vibe.  The feature released in the US as Mission of Darkness is just so damn flaky ya gotta love it.

      This is what I hear, anyway.

      For those of who were following the Republican bitch slap of the Democrats over an immediate Iraq pullout, the final vote was 400-3 against.

      400-3.

      Not only did the Democrats not have the courage of their own slimy rhetoric, even the interns got up off their knees (so to speak) and voted against it.

      Posted by richard mcenroe on 2005 11 19 at 01:28 AM • permalink

 

    1. I think I found this board’s Soul-Mate

      Posted by richard mcenroe on 2005 11 19 at 01:45 AM • permalink

 

    1. wronwright—we paid him in New Zealand dollars, heh heh heh…

      Posted by richard mcenroe on 2005 11 19 at 01:46 AM • permalink

 

    1. Getting dashed exhausting listening to the cricket what..Kerry O’keefe this am mentioned sniffing “ink”.
      Immediately Fazir launched into a lecture about petrol sniffing in indigenous communities and how one community has succeeded in overcoming it.The kids went out bush with the tribal elders and rearranged their attitudes etc.
      Followed up with several ringing endorsments of “traditional values”..
      Last time I heard it was Americanized Aussie soapies and blue eyed blondes who got themselves into impossible situations and were far too scantily attired etc.
      All good worthy instruction but kind of irritating if you just want to veg out and enjoy the cricket…..

      Posted by crash on 2005 11 19 at 03:28 AM • permalink

 

    1. Let Wronwright eat cake…

      Posted by crash on 2005 11 19 at 03:30 AM • permalink

 

    1. The vote was 400-3 and after incessantly bagging Bush the press are now in damage control

      Posted by rog on 2005 11 19 at 07:19 AM • permalink

 

    1. That rich Saudi playboy, Bin Laden
      Says ‘You’ll never guess where I’m hiding!
      These Waziri’s are great
      but if I eat one more date
      I’ll beat them like this donkey I’m riding”

      The Waziri’s, of course, were nonplussed
      They said ‘Hey, bumboy, why all the fuss?
      We feed you our stewed oats
      let you screw our goats
      And blow up the occasional bus”

      Osama retorts “Not enough!
      The whole world must believe that I’m tough!
      Come, let’s reason together
      Dress your goats in black leather
      Then film me treating ‘em rough”

      Next proclaimed thru Islamic halls
      “US must sign Kyoto protocols
      No more girls driving cars!
      And let’s close all the bars
      And prohibit goats kicking our balls!”

      Posted by Carl H on 2005 11 19 at 09:45 AM • permalink

 

    1. Anybody catch “The Boondocks” on the Cartoon Network?

      Ugly. In every sense of the word. Just like the strip. And staggeringly, crashingly unfunny. Just like the strip.

      Posted by Dave S. on 2005 11 19 at 10:25 AM • permalink

 

    1. o/t “People’s enquiry” into Immigration dept and Detention centres to be run by Justice Marcus Einfeld!
      (Champion of human rights groups,illegal immigrants’ groups,the U.N. etcetc…)
      Well that’ll be unbiased (not).

      Posted by crash on 2005 11 19 at 11:53 AM • permalink

 

    1. Carl H

      Great stuff.

      Posted by ekw on 2005 11 19 at 12:09 PM • permalink

 

    1. crash, I’m all for closing down the detention centres.

      Just ship em home as soon as they get here.

      They’ve heard about our fantastic egalitarian system, welfare and all – everyone gets one cattle class ticket home on the flying kangaroo, and they get a free feed on the trip.

      It’s cheaper than a detention centre, and if everyone gets one, then nobody can complain about special treatment.

      Works for me.

      Posted by Nilknarf Arbed on 2005 11 19 at 05:55 PM • permalink

 

    1. Mister Carl, me like your work.

      Posted by SwinishCapitalist on 2005 11 20 at 04:43 AM • permalink

 

    1. what shocked me most about the article is that it appeared in the sydney morning herald!

      How did they sneak that one past the editors?

      Posted by Jonny on 2005 11 21 at 12:38 AM • permalink

 

    1. 113 Crash

      Let Wronwright eat cake…

      Wronwright has cake?  Hey man, don’t bogart that cake!

      Posted by Stoop Davy Dave on 2005 11 22 at 10:59 AM • permalink

 

    1. 14 very Stoop

      …Senate voted it down 99-0.  Only thing that makes that funny enough to remember is that *Senator* John Kerry took part in that vote, which is why Kyoto never became an issue in the 2005 prex-election.

      Er, amend that to “95-0” and “the 2004 prex-election,” please and thank you.  (Effin’ Bitters been hitting me harder than I thought!)

      Posted by Stoop Davy Dave on 2005 11 22 at 11:03 AM • permalink

 

  1. 109 Mr. McEnroe

    Overfiend (urotsukidoji) is a tentacle porn classic, first series at least.  Second is a bit of a disappointment.  LA Blue Girl is funnier though, because of the horny dwarf ninja.  Twin Angels/Twin Dolls has the same vibe.  The feature released in the US as Mission of Darkness is just so damn flaky ya gotta love it.

    What, no link?  Bastard!
    But, um, I mean “bastard” in a fawning, groveling, smarmy way, sir.

    Posted by Stoop Davy Dave on 2005 11 22 at 11:17 AM • permalink