Al squira

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Last updated on August 9th, 2017 at 07:31 am

It’s a squirrel insurgency in California:

“The squirrels will be back,” South Bay wildlife rehabilitator Norma Campbell said. “For every one you take out, two more will come in. It could be a never-ending project that isn’t going to accomplish anything.”

James Taranto blames Donald Rumsfeld.

Posted by Tim B. on 10/01/2006 at 01:14 PM
    1. Are they sure that they’re not ones from Moscow?

      Posted by andycanuck on 2006 10 01 at 01:24 PM • permalink


    1. I live in Mtn View but have no comment. Anyone criticizing these squirrels becomes a target and I’m too intimidated.
      However, I take back the bad thing I said about Canada in a previous thread.

      from StrategyPage
      Wear Red Friday
      Not reported in the MSM, but last Friday about 3,500 Canadians gathered in Toronto to show their support for Canadian troops in Afghanistan by wearing red. CanadiansWearRed

      Posted by Jim,MtnViewCA,USA on 2006 10 01 at 02:05 PM • permalink


    1. A small but dedicated crew of 12 year old boys with slingshots, working on weekends and holidays, and this problem is fixed in a year or less.

      Put a dollar bounty on each squirrel head and the problem is over before next Easter vacation ends.

      Posted by Grimmy on 2006 10 01 at 02:10 PM • permalink


    1. Oh, for Pete’s sake.  Start an official cat presence in the park.  All tame, neutered, immunized, and fed a merely adequate diet.

      I speak from personal experience.  Not being neutered, I mean, but the cats.  And the squirrels.  The LATE squirrels.

      Posted by Callie on 2006 10 01 at 02:12 PM • permalink


    1. Maybe these squirrels just know nuts when they see them. Expect a few Peta advocates to be nibbled to death by the end of the week.

      Posted by BethB on 2006 10 01 at 02:20 PM • permalink


    1. Kiddie hunters contraindicated, those nasty little fuzzy-tailed tree-rats have been known to carry Bubonic plague. And rabies.

      Posted by mojo on 2006 10 01 at 02:22 PM • permalink


    1. Aiiiiyyyyyye.

      (wrings hands, hopes that Stoop Davy Dave didn’t smuggle in band of neocon trained killer Russian squirrels; must work on look of surprise and a plausibly deniable excuse to give to Karl)

      “WHAT?  Oh my god.  I had no idea, none.  But if you’ll notice, paco hasn’t been in the office lately.  And you know he’s been acting suspiciously lately.  Why I believe I even saw a “Stop Global Warming ” sticker on his bumper.”

      Posted by wronwright on 2006 10 01 at 02:23 PM • permalink


    1. Time to revive the old Brunswick Stew recipe. I actually have an “organic” cookbook (published in the early 60s when the movement was in its early, rough stages) that has a Brunswick Stew recipe that begins “take three squirrels and dress them”—and it didn’t mean “dress them in little hats and vests” either.

      Posted by Andrea Harris, Administrator on 2006 10 01 at 02:23 PM • permalink


    1. Quagmire!

      And the kid who got scratched, another grim milestone.

      Posted by Patricia on 2006 10 01 at 02:26 PM • permalink


    1. Thank you for the apology, Jim. Here’s a pro-military site about our helping hand in the GWOT.
      I don’t always agree with this blogger on domestic military issues (kind of like how some pro-GWOT conservatives dislike Rumsfeld over not having enough boots on the ground and making the military too specialised), but the site’s usually worth it.

      (And you might want to look for a site called Small Dead Animals too, although it covers Canadian domestic politics—and international too—rather than just military.)

      Posted by andycanuck on 2006 10 01 at 02:45 PM • permalink


    1. Here’s another one for y’all andycanuck:

      Blog 8
      This one has some outstanding video blogs of Canadian forces in the Afghan front of the GWOT.

      Posted by Grimmy on 2006 10 01 at 02:49 PM • permalink


    1. “The squirrels will be back,” South Bay wildlife rehabilitator Norma Campbell said. “For every one you take out, two more will come in. It could be a never-ending project that isn’t going to accomplish anything.”

      Two things.  One, what the hell is a ‘wildlife rehabilitator’?

      Two, apparently the same ‘hydra’ argument applied to terrorists can also work for squirrels.

      Posted by RyanOH on 2006 10 01 at 03:04 PM • permalink


    1. Squirrels are the juvenile deliquents of the animal kingdom.  If those people figure out how to get rid of them, I hope they tell me so I can get that little bugger who pulls the top off my bird feeder and knocks over my bird bath.

      Posted by RebeccaH on 2006 10 01 at 03:42 PM • permalink


    1. Thanks, Grimmy, I’ve linked to ones on YouTube somewhere else at Tim’s. (Although apparently, now, the guys are going to have to get them cleared with the brass first before posting.)

      And as I vaguely recall, the shorter YouTube ones (like the 2.5 minute ones) were the most action packed. I don’t have the link handy, but I believe they can be found by “searching” at YouTube for ‘Afghanistan Canadian troops’ or similar.

      Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got to make some MREs. ;^)

      Posted by andycanuck on 2006 10 01 at 03:49 PM • permalink


    1. There are links, page right under ‘Cool Links’, to the YouTube combat videos here:
      The stories linked are MSM ones, and so aren’t all that I’d like them to be. (Like the Company C one from the left-lib Toronto Star.)

      Posted by andycanuck on 2006 10 01 at 04:01 PM • permalink


    1. This is sort of like a few years ago when that poor child was killed by a dingo on Fraser Island. The increased aggresiveness of the animals was in responce to a reduction in their food supply. In the squirrels case the installation of scavenger proof bins, even though nothing was said at the time I would think that something similar was in place before the dingo attack. The solution to both is the same of course – good old fashioned cull.

      Posted by rbresca on 2006 10 01 at 04:34 PM • permalink


    1. The squirrel offensive is proof that we need to ban all violent video games.

      Posted by Dminor on 2006 10 01 at 04:34 PM • permalink


    1. It could also be the predictable outcome of reducing our children’s access to environmentally educational games, such as “whack-a-mole”.

      Posted by Grimmy on 2006 10 01 at 04:44 PM • permalink


    1. Sydney Morning Herald will be all over this one.
      “Small animal of unknown appearance robs 4 year old boy of muffin”
      Must consider the moderate squirrels.

      Posted by Hank Reardon on 2006 10 01 at 05:57 PM • permalink


    1. Correct Taranto (Opinion Journal) link (scroll to   “A Sciurine Quagmire!”)

      Posted by Old Grouch on 2006 10 01 at 06:00 PM • permalink


    1. You sure these squirrels aren’t Cane Toads?

      Posted by Bonmot on 2006 10 01 at 06:11 PM • permalink


    1. “The squirrels will be back,” South Bay wildlife rehabilitator Norma Campbell said. “For every one you take out, two more will come in. It could be a never-ending project that isn’t going to accomplish anything.”

      Clearly Campbell’s ill advised imperialist invasion of the South Bay has created more squirrels and has diverted resources from the Global War on Squirrels.

      Posted by Vanguard of the Commentariat on 2006 10 01 at 06:21 PM • permalink


    1. “The squirrels will be back,” South Bay wildlife rehabilitator Norma Campbell said. “For every one you take out, two more will come in. It could be a never-ending project that isn’t going to accomplish anything.”

      Interesting maths. Cut squirrels in half and you double their numbers. Isn’t that how germs multiply?
      A bit like the anti-dammers who claim that if we build more dams we will just have more dams with no water in them.

      Posted by Skeeter on 2006 10 01 at 06:45 PM • permalink


    1. Squirrels are looking for nuts in California.  That state has a surplus of nuts.  So where’s the problem?

      Posted by The_Real_JeffS on 2006 10 01 at 06:46 PM • permalink


    1. #12, Ryan:

      “Wildlife rehabilitation involves caring for injured, ill and orphaned wild animals with the goal of releasing each into its natural habitat. Each animal is examined, diagnosed and treated through an individually tailored program of veterinary care, hospital care, feeding, medicating, physical therapy, exercising and pre-release conditioning. Releases are planned for appropriate weather, season, habitat and location. Some animals, of course, are beyond help when found and are humanely euthanized. Unreleasable animals occasionally provide valuable research information or are suitable as educational aids.”
      —What Is Wildlife Rehabilitation?

      Posted by mojo on 2006 10 01 at 07:16 PM • permalink


    1. Jonah Goldberg’s dog Cosmo has been keeping a nose on the squirrel menace for years.  He has repeatedly warned us about the rise of the Jacobin squirrels, but would anyone listen?  No!  Drastic measures will have to be taken to stop this spate of squirrel terrorism.

      Cats? Ha.  Remember the Russian squirrels who dismembered a dog?  Cats will be unable to fight such vicious and skillfull rodents.  The Russian influence is obviously spreading.  The answer is to strike back with superior technology: .22 caliber rifles.

      Wronwright, if Karl asks me I’ll back up your story.  Just be more careful what you put in the Tardis from now on.  But don’t try blaming Paco.  Karl knows that bumper sticker is for infiltration purposes for the special job he assigned Paco to do.

      Posted by Michael Lonie on 2006 10 01 at 07:45 PM • permalink


    1. There were no squirrels in California until we invaded. Nor were there any weapons of mass de-nut-ion.

      Posted by Dave S. on 2006 10 01 at 08:37 PM • permalink


    1. 26.
      Michael Lonie

      But was he meant to do this??

      ” One protester was able to slip inside the ballroom during the dinner but was escorted out after shouting about men and women dying, the Austin American-Statesman reported in its Sunday editions”

      Cindy Shehag and friends assault our dark lord!!!

      Posted by thefrollickingmole on 2006 10 01 at 08:52 PM • permalink


    1. No, no, no, Mojo.

      One, what the hell is a ‘wildlife rehabilitator’?

      A. That is the specially trained person I had to hire for the day after the party during my graduate days parties.  You shoulda seen some of those people the next day.  They needed *serious* rehab.

      Posted by JorgXMcKie on 2006 10 01 at 09:51 PM • permalink


    1. An aggressive squirrel pounced on a 4-year-old boy in an attack last week in Cuesta Park in Mountain View, Calif.

      The attack happened as the boy’s mother unwrapped a muffin during a picnic.

      Well, there you go! That mother should have known you don’t taunt a underfed squirrel by brazenly unwrapping a muffin right in front of it.

      Posted by rinardman on 2006 10 01 at 11:36 PM • permalink


    1. Pounced? Squirrels pounce? Who knew?

      They must be more like Tiggers than I thought.

      Posted by mojo on 2006 10 01 at 11:42 PM • permalink


    1. #2 Jim;

      I haven’t been to any Mt. View parks for a while, but isn’t Cuesta Park one that’s filled with those coal-black tree squirrels?

      Don’t see them much elsewhere in the south bay area, but it seems that there aren’t any other squirrels in some of the local parks.

      Posted by steveH on 2006 10 02 at 12:02 AM • permalink


    1. #6 Mojo;

      known to carry Bubonic plague


      Plague is endemic in west coast ground squirrel populations.

      A good number, if not most, of the up to a dozen cases of plague each year in the U.S. are connected with the little furry-tailed ground rats.

      Posted by steveH on 2006 10 02 at 12:06 AM • permalink


    1. Beware the squirrelly wrath!

      Posted by Spiny Norman on 2006 10 02 at 01:16 AM • permalink


    1. We have to ask, why do the varmints hate us? Obviously this is the result of poverty breeding resentment, which breeds these acts of violence. If we are to achieve peace, we have to sit down with these plague carrying, vermin infested vermin, and seek common ground. Or common tree limbs. And you will note that it ain’t Donald Rumsfled or the other neocons bearing the brunt of the onslaught, but the poor innocent youth that we have deployed to the park with neither an exit strategy or a nap.

      Posted by Blue Hen on 2006 10 02 at 12:57 PM • permalink


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