WEALTH AVOIDED

Originally I aimed to be a photographer; gave it up to concentrate on journalism. Good career move, genius:

The past few years have seen an explosive rise in the prices paid for exclusive celebrity photos. Driven by the public’s desire for the nitty-gritty of celebrity life and celebrities’ moves to control – and profit from – their images, the photos on our list are testament to a maturing market worth tens of millions.

I’m open to offers for my 1982 press conference shot of Victorian premier John Cain.

Posted by Tim B. on 07/22/2007 at 08:13 AM
    1. But you would have to live with yourself, too.

      Anyway, these days it would be no fun unless you worked for Al-Reuters.

      Posted by entropy on 2007 07 22 at 08:28 AM • permalink

 

    1. John Cain – Scotch College’s greatest embarrassment.

      Posted by Jack Lacton on 2007 07 22 at 08:41 AM • permalink

 

    1. Never mind the money, I have a friend who is actually, yes really, no bullshit, a Penthouse photographer.  He used to live around the corner where every stripper in Melbourne went to get their portfolio done, having passed his name between themselves.  Oh – and they paid him.

      Mind, it does make keeping a steady relationship difficult.  If you like that sort of thing.

      Posted by Craig Mc on 2007 07 22 at 08:42 AM • permalink

 

    1. I still occasionally hit myself over the head with something hard and blunt for not taking a job as a librarian’s assistant back in my youth. Even though I used to say I always wanted to be a librarian I have somehow managed to avoid working in a library. Stupid me—in the States library positions are usually government jobs with great benefits and a decent salary. For example, right near my neck of the woods there is a position open. That pay might not seem to be much, but the low end of the wage is almost two dollars more an hour than I am making now. Oh well, I really don’t want to work for the government, I tell myself.

      Posted by Andrea Harris, Administrator on 2007 07 22 at 08:46 AM • permalink

 

    1. That’s it. I’m sending my Igor Stravinsky photos to the National Enquirer.

      Posted by rhhardin on 2007 07 22 at 08:48 AM • permalink

 

    1. #2, at least John Cain had the decency to resign.  The same can’t be said of the utterly worthless Kirner.

      Legend has it that at a cabinet meeting – where the participants were all arguing in their usual, fractious, incompentent way – he looked around in despair.  He immediately decided it was a hopeless deceit to think you could run a government – even a provincial one – with dickheads like those and quit on the spot.  He was right.

      Posted by Craig Mc on 2007 07 22 at 08:52 AM • permalink

 

    1. Andrea, I had a girlfriend who was a librarian.  The bitterest woman alive.  Even before we went out I mean.

      I don’t think it was the job’s fault, but you never know.

      Posted by Craig Mc on 2007 07 22 at 08:55 AM • permalink

 

    1. The bitterest woman alive.

      See? I coulda been a contender! The job was made for me! *sob*

      Posted by Andrea Harris, Administrator on 2007 07 22 at 09:08 AM • permalink

 

    1. Originally I aimed to be a photographer; gave it up to concentrate on journalism.

      Eh.  A thousand words here, a thousand words there….

      Posted by Apostic on 2007 07 22 at 09:09 AM • permalink

 

    1. Um, Andrea, I dont think zulu spears and thumbscrews are allowed to be used by librarians though. Besides then your only be chasing wronwright over a few overdue books instead of stuff that realy matters.

      (Ps is there any truth he owes 1700 years of overdue fines from the great library of AlexANDREA?)

      Posted by thefrollickingmole on 2007 07 22 at 09:12 AM • permalink

 

    1. #6, shows the intelligence of the man.
      Respect.

      Posted by carpefraise on 2007 07 22 at 09:44 AM • permalink

 

    1. Tim, I’ll accept $25 bucks to take it off your hands. I would, of course, immediately burn it.

      Posted by CB on 2007 07 22 at 09:45 AM • permalink

 

    1. #1, You “have to live with yourself”, yeah sure you might hound the occasional princess to her death, but the rewards are there!

      Posted by anthony_r on 2007 07 22 at 09:46 AM • permalink

 

    1. Tim,

      Email me a copy of the photo, I’ll Photoshop in some rubble, a couple of dead Lebanese, a stuffed toy and a wailing chick named Fatima.

      Reuters will give you cash on the spot.

      Posted by Dan Lewis on 2007 07 22 at 09:52 AM • permalink

 

    1. I’m open to offers for my 1982 press conference shot of Victorian premier John Cain.

      Just so long as its not an “upskirt” photo eh Tim?

      Posted by bondo on 2007 07 22 at 10:00 AM • permalink

 

    1. Tim B,

      What’s wrong with your collection of celebrity fridges? You could open a gallery in select suburbs and claim the pictures are an “artistic expression, symbolizing the synergy of post modern capitalism and neo colonialism with the plight of the endangered bandicoot, culminating in the end of mankind by global warming as defined by the cold fridge”. Shit, that’s brilliant. If you don’t let me know and I’ll open the gallery either in Newtown, Sydney, or across the road from RMIT….

      Posted by Fast Eddie on 2007 07 22 at 10:03 AM • permalink

 

    1. #14

      Email me a copy of the photo, I’ll Photoshop in some rubble, a couple of dead Lebanese, a stuffed toy and a wailing chick named Fatima.

      Reuters will give you cash on the spot.

      Extra cash if the rubble looks like it’s actually on the ground…

      Posted by AlburyShifton on 2007 07 22 at 10:12 AM • permalink

 

    1. Just so long as its not an “upskirt” photo eh Tim?

      And there went my breakfast.

      Posted by Apostic on 2007 07 22 at 10:13 AM • permalink

 

    1. Or you could live like this guy.

      Posted by aaron_ on 2007 07 22 at 10:41 AM • permalink

 

    1. TFM, you don’t have your finger on the pulse of librarian like do. I’m married to one. They even have a secret society that used to rob banks and kidnap heiresses. http://www.sla.org/

      Posted by Some0Seppo on 2007 07 22 at 11:12 AM • permalink

 

    1. Tim, look at it this way: at least you don’t have to worry about all that extra income tax liability.

      Posted by paco on 2007 07 22 at 11:22 AM • permalink

 

    1. They even have a secret society that used to rob banks and kidnap heiresses. [link to ]http://www.sla.org/]

      Heheheh.  And in that same vein, some old Soviet spies still maintain a radio station here in San Diego.  Is quite popular – OR ELSE.

      Posted by Apostic on 2007 07 22 at 11:22 AM • permalink

 

    1. Besides, Tim, what if your subjects turned out to be like this guy?

      (Of course, thanks to cropping, it is pretty funny).

      Posted by paco on 2007 07 22 at 11:27 AM • permalink

 

    1. Craig Mc—He may not have had the fun you think he had.  I had a very brief career editing porno movies (okay, one feature).  You would not believe how boring that is, or how much like real work porno sex is.

      Posted by richard mcenroe on 2007 07 22 at 01:40 PM • permalink

 

    1. Um, Andrea, I dont think zulu spears and thumbscrews are allowed to be used by librarians though.

      They aren’t? Then my parents lied to me! *frown*

      Posted by Andrea Harris, Administrator on 2007 07 22 at 03:36 PM • permalink

 

    1. #25: I’m not sure about that. I think librarians are given considerable latitude in maintaining peace and quiet.

      Posted by paco on 2007 07 22 at 05:12 PM • permalink

 

    1. Whew, Tim, that was a narrow escape from effluence.

      Posted by kae on 2007 07 22 at 05:34 PM • permalink

 

    1. I still occasionally hit myself over the head with something hard and blunt for not taking a job as a librarian’s assistant back in my youth.

      You had a lucky escape. My wife is a librarian’s assistant – library technicians they’re called here.  It would have been the just job for you provided you like being treated like a skivvy, condescended to, not having your opinions on library matters considered (or even listened to).  Because, you know, you have got proper library qualifications. You’re just a piece of dirt good for shelf stacking, and that’s about it.

      Posted by walterplinge on 2007 07 22 at 05:58 PM • permalink

 

    1. You can take my photograph for free Tim B!

      Posted by 1.618 on 2007 07 22 at 06:42 PM • permalink

 

    1. Oh, I’ve photographed John Howard, Sarah Murdoch, Geoffrey Rush, Gai Waterhouse to name a few. (That got you all thinking)

      Posted by 1.618 on 2007 07 22 at 06:46 PM • permalink

 

    1. Photos. Hmmm…
      I have reason to believe that the chap who sold me that photo of 1.618 ripped me off. I found the exact same snap at his stall yesterday in a portfolio of photos of Margaret Thatcher.
      I’ve already been blacklisted from every second hand dealer in Perth. In my efforts to track down the elusive New Idea I may have been a shade too enthusiastic.
      So – let’s vote on the question.

      I would bet my life (or at least a good thirst-quenching sixpack) on 1.618 most resembling…

      Girl Number One
      Girl Number Two
      Girl Number Three
      Girl Number Four
      Girl Number Five
      Girl Number Six
      Girl Number Seven
      Girl Number Eight
      Girl Number Nine
      Girl Number Ten

      Posted by SwinishCapitalist on 2007 07 22 at 07:18 PM • permalink

 

    1. paco, you’d think a serious presidential candidate would have someone advising who would tell him it’s not a good idea to throw away the votes of any man with a moderate level of testosterone with poses like that.  Also, it will probably cost him the votes of a great many women who want men to be men.

      Edwards in that pic looks exactly like the guy everyone in high school hated. (Well, everyone normal, that is.) I suppose he could look more like a self-satisfied wussy if he really worked at is, but I’m not sure just how.

      Probably the person who wears the pants in his family (That would be Elizabeth) thinks that’s a great look.

      Posted by JorgXMcKie on 2007 07 22 at 07:23 PM • permalink

 

    1. #32: JorgX: I suppose he could look more like a self-satisfied wussy if he really worked at is, but I’m not sure just how.

      An alpaca sweater might do it, but that would surely take him to precisely 100% on the wussy scale. As is, I’d say he was at 99.5%.

      Posted by paco on 2007 07 22 at 07:40 PM • permalink

 

    1. . number 6 maybe

      Posted by 1.618 on 2007 07 22 at 07:51 PM • permalink

 

    1. #31 Swinnish

      4 or 6 as they look the closest to Michelle Pfeiffer amd 1.6 tells us that is who she resembles.

      Posted by Pickles on 2007 07 22 at 09:36 PM • permalink

 

    1. ——Attention tablod rag editors!——

      Tired of paying big bucks for a couple of snapshots of whatever airhead happens to be the celebrity of the moment?  Tired of pesky bodyguards and security officers thwarting your quest for the latest in juicy gossip?

      Get the compromising photos* your need for your latest hit piece from Paparazzi Affiliated Camera Operators today!  We’ll get you the dirt you need, and beat any competitor’s price by 5%!  And if you call today, we’ll throw in a coupon good for 10% off your next defamation lawauit defense from Pending Action Counsel Organization!  Call today, Because you wouldn’t want any photos of that party you had in Vegas last November to get out now, would you?

      *Actual medium may vary.  Don’t worry, most of your readers are braindead anyway, and wouldn’t be able to tell the difference.  Besides, you wouldn’t believe the stuff they’re doing with crayons these days…

      Posted by Vexorg on 2007 07 22 at 09:52 PM • permalink

 

    1. #35 – true, Pickles, but that might just be 1.618’s way of preserving her secret identity.

      Anyway, I’m voting for Number 5.

      Posted by SwinishCapitalist on 2007 07 22 at 10:06 PM • permalink

 

    1. 6. 5.  Yep, no big deal Mr Capitalist. Pickles, what’s your first name?

      6/Yes she’s been lit quite nicely with one soft box and flash unit with plain backdrop.  There’s minimal photoshop work on the subject. My new trend is straight hair, I love it.

      Do I win a prize? For example, can I share a shower with Tim B to conserve and save the world from Soap suds. Do my bit to help save the dolphins

      Posted by 1.618 on 2007 07 22 at 11:09 PM • permalink

 

    1. Well, I deliberately avoided choosing Six because she looks too much like a former work colleague. Someone I remember fondly, I hasten to add, just thought that she was too obvious a choice.

      Posted by SwinishCapitalist on 2007 07 22 at 11:49 PM • permalink

 

    1. I’ve got a photo of me staring at Jamie Lee Curtis’s tits. Any takers?

      Posted by Bonmot on 2007 07 23 at 01:05 AM • permalink

 

    1. #40
      Before or after they was got at by the plastic surgeon?

      Posted by Pickles on 2007 07 23 at 01:20 AM • permalink

 

    1. Glad you have taste Mr Capitalist.

      Posted by 1.618 on 2007 07 23 at 01:37 AM • permalink

 

    1. Pickles – after mate.
      Glorious orbs they are too.
      Mountains of pleasure, spheres of delectable, yummy invitation. Except for some other very large people in the room, I would have seized the moment….

      Posted by Bonmot on 2007 07 23 at 01:39 AM • permalink

 

    1. #38 1.6

      Not telling. Will give the game away altogether..

      Posted by Pickles on 2007 07 23 at 01:39 AM • permalink

 

    1. #43
      making that noise wot Homer makes when he thinks about pork chops or chocolate..

      Posted by Pickles on 2007 07 23 at 01:41 AM • permalink

 

    1. 45? Does it start with a D?

      I don’t mind, I love the name Pickles and I feel like I’m blind or wearing a burqua in this site. All we can judge each other by is by what we write, or draw or what ever in here. This is quite exciting.

      Posted by 1.618 on 2007 07 23 at 03:43 AM • permalink

 

    1. Good career move, genius:

      And do you call it “the Anabel Principle”?
      Or perhaps “the Tim Blair Principle”?

      Not that I can boast at all.

      Posted by DropDeadUgly on 2007 07 23 at 04:26 AM • permalink

 

    1. #43 Pickles
      making that noise wot Homer makes when he thinks about pork chops or chocolate..

      Actually a lunge for the flesh was what I had in mind……

      Posted by Bonmot on 2007 07 23 at 05:05 AM • permalink

 

    1. #46 1.6
      P

      Posted by Pickles on 2007 07 23 at 05:57 PM • permalink

 

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