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WHALE POINTS
War continues between Greenpeace and their Sea Shepherd rivals as both seek credit for menacing Japanese whalers. The SS are upset that Greenpeace won’t reveal the whalers’ location, but claim to have enemy support:
“We have our sources in Greenpeace. There are quite a few disgruntled Greenpeacers who are opposed to Greenpeace’s policy of non-cooperation. They are being very helpful,” said Captain Watson.
But who needs Greenpeace double agents when the whales themselves are volunteering their whaley detection abilities:
Greenpeace declined to comment on Esperanza’s position, but the western location confirmed Sea Shepherd president Paul Watson’s belief that the whalers were likely to be working north of Prydz Bay, in the Co-operation Sea, where he was headed.
He also said a whale showed him the way. “Yesterday a large humpback whale surfaced beside the Steve Irwin and seven times raised his long flipper into the air, and seven times brought it down pointing in a direction due west, as if to say ‘go this way’.”
Possibly. Or perhaps that alert humpback was warning everybody to stay away from Greenpeace engineer Bent:
The only smell that turns me on is the smell of diesel. This is why, especially at night, I used to go down to the Engine Room, stroke my engines, then dip my hands into the diesel. Unfortunately, I was caught in action one night, so I had to think of other ways to make it look more “natural”. This is why every now and again, I start breaking engines into pieces, only to reassemble them again. Not that there is anything wrong with our propulsion system on board, or because of lack of maintenance, but this is the only way for me to get my hands dirty in diesel oil.
He’s German.
(Via Adrian the Cabbie)
UPDATE. Dave S.:
Yeah, verily did the leviathan seven times raise his flipper, and verily did he let it drop seven times, and by this reckoning didst we follow, for yea, it was like unto a sign from the Lord. Amen.
And Dean:
And lo, the whaleth pointeth the way to the yellow brick road, not seven times, but I sayeth unto you, seventy times seven times!
Maybe the humpback was emulating a human gesture?
Posted by The_Real_JeffS on 2008 01 13 at 12:23 PM • permalinkAlso from Bent, “I just like the feeling of the bare engine between my legs. The more powerful it is, the better I feel.”
No doubt he prowls the seafront looking for powerful diesel engines to ride.
Oh, and Bent, that’s not blond hair. it’s gray.
Posted by Bruce Rheinstein on 2008 01 13 at 02:31 PM • permalinkWhale points? I can’t even cash in my frequent flier miles…
Posted by richard mcenroe on 2008 01 13 at 02:40 PM • permalinkWar continues between Greenpeace and their Sea Shepherd rivals
SPLITTERS!
Posted by Spiny Norman on 2008 01 13 at 03:02 PM • permalinkHe also said a whale showed him the way. “Yesterday a large humpback whale surfaced beside the Steve Irwin and seven times raised his long flipper into the air, and seven times brought it down pointing in a direction due west, as if to say ‘go this way’.”
If this doesn’t illustrate the moonbat mindset, I don’t know what would. I’m surprised there weren’t rainbows and mermaids as well.
And that Bent guy is… well… bent.
#6 - Spiny
War continues between Greenpeace and their Sea Shepherd rivals
“And where is the faction ‘Shepherd of the Sea’?”
“That’s him that kayak over there”.
“SPLITTER”
Posted by mr creosote on 2008 01 13 at 03:51 PM • permalinkWhy can’t Bent have a normal fetish, like shoes? Or black leather and riding crops? What with hanging out in the engine room and dipping his hands in diesel, the guy is going to die of hydrocarbon poisoning…
...carry on, Bent.
(I just realized that Carry On Bent would make a great title for the British Carry On film series. Why, the plot practically writes itself!)
These guys have watched Free Willy one too many times. What I find more incredible is that the BBC journalist reporting on this story is named Jonah Fisher.
Actually I’d be more concerned about Bent freeing his willy amongst the diesel oil…
Posted by Harry Buttle on 2008 01 13 at 06:32 PM • permalink“Yesterday a large humpback whale surfaced beside the Steve Irwin and seven times raised his long flipper into the air, and seven times brought it down pointing in a direction due west, as if to say ‘go this way’.”
Yeah, verily did the leviathan seven times raise his flipper, and verily did he let it drop seven times, and by this reckoning didst we follow, for yea, it was like unto a sign from the Lord. Amen.
Freeing willy where there’s diesel is a good way to get the shaft Bent.
Posted by chriscoolc on 2008 01 13 at 07:37 PM • permalinkIt’s the People’s Front of Judea vs. the Judean People’s Front all over again. Time to nuke some popcorn.
Posted by Tommy Shanks on 2008 01 13 at 07:45 PM • permalinkWar continues between Greenpeace and their Sea Shepherd rivals
I have no doubt it would be similar to one between Barry the Florist and Shawn the Hair Stylist. “Oh you bitch! I’ll slap you.”
Posted by wronwright on 2008 01 13 at 08:29 PM • permalinkRe #20, LOL, chriscoolc!!! The puns are just flowing from this collection of environmental clowns. Comedy gold!!!
Posted by The_Real_JeffS on 2008 01 13 at 08:34 PM • permalinkBent might be interested in this little version of their mission, Das Boot Vs Moby Dick?
Silly but not far off the mark for these “heroes”
Posted by thefrollickingmole on 2008 01 13 at 08:38 PM • permalinkThat slapping behavior is common among humpies. No one really knows why they do it, the speculation among cetologists being that it is a form of long distance communication between individuals. On the other hand, it could be just the humpy equivalent of saying “Damn, I’m good.” In any case it is unlikely to mean “They went thataway.”
Posted by Michael Lonie on 2008 01 13 at 09:13 PM • permalinkGreenpeace and Sea Shepherds still at war?
IT’S A QUAGMIRE!! IT’S A QUAGMIRE!!
Posted by Toiling Mass on 2008 01 13 at 09:33 PM • permalinkAnd lo, the whaleth pointeth the way to the yellow brick road, not seven times, but I sayeth unto you, seventy times seven times!
Posted by dean martin on 2008 01 13 at 10:01 PM • permalinkDave S. did a much better job than others here who shall remain nameless.
Posted by dean martin on 2008 01 13 at 10:11 PM • permalinkOf course, 7 is a mystical number. These fanatics may worship Mother Gaia™, but I’m sure that they are not above swiping old superstitions.
Posted by The_Real_JeffS on 2008 01 13 at 10:29 PM • permalink1.618 is a much more mystical number.
But I don’t think a whale can wave a flipper 1.618 times.Posted by Pedro the Ignorant on 2008 01 14 at 12:51 AM • permalinkIt is a well known fact among mariners that when the sky is cloudy and the stars not visible, let a whale be your GPS.
Posted by Infidel Tiger on 2008 01 14 at 01:13 AM • permalink
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Guide them well, young whale, guide them well!
And hopefully make them crash into each other, just for my amusement.
Oh, and has anyone mentioned to Bent that’s he’s creepy and odd?