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WEDDING CANCELLED

I’m all in favour of firearms as a courtship accelerator, but they’re a little redundant once a proposal has been accepted. Dangerous, too.

Posted by Tim B. on 10/19/2006 at 12:01 PM

  1. Sounds to me like fortune intervened.  Now maybe the girl can find somebody to marry who isn’t a moron.

    What is it with Muslims and shooting guns in the air, anyway?  Haven’t they bothered to ask the imam about gravity?

    Posted by RebeccaH on 2006 10 19 at 12:11 PM • permalink

  2. Tragic, but this guy is a clear candidate for a Darwin award.

    Posted by The_Real_JeffS on 2006 10 19 at 12:11 PM • permalink

  3. I’m sorry Tim - I can’t comment on this story until I have asked the Imam

    Posted by aussiemagpie on 2006 10 19 at 12:12 PM • permalink

  4. What is with these fuckwits? She’s probably his first cousin, [apparently 80% of marriages are immediate family], so the funeral will be a sad, but close knit, affair.

    Posted by LaoHuLi on 2006 10 19 at 12:15 PM • permalink

  5. Another example of the fact that a combination of Islam, testosterone and guns cannot be relied upon to deliver happy outcomes.

    Posted by James Waterton on 2006 10 19 at 12:32 PM • permalink

  6. Perhaps this whole tragedy could have been avoided if they had been allowed to read the infidel Shakespeare’s “Romeo and Juliet”.

    Posted by kbiel on 2006 10 19 at 12:41 PM • permalink

  7. Shakespeare with an AK47.  Imagine that!

    Posted by The_Real_JeffS on 2006 10 19 at 12:54 PM • permalink

  8. Not entirely off topic.

    In a recent interview, when the subject of marriage came up, Sir Paul McCartney was asked if he would ever go down on one knee again.

    “I’d prefer that you called her Heather”, he replied.

    Posted by jlc on 2006 10 19 at 01:03 PM • permalink

  9. jlc: Best Joke Ever!

    Posted by Mr. Bingley on 2006 10 19 at 01:07 PM • permalink

  10. You have to admit it’s efficient—Romeo & Juliet, straight from Act II, Scene ii (balcony) to Act V, Scene iii (everyone’s dead). (Although not everyone’s dead.)

    Posted by SoberHT on 2006 10 19 at 01:17 PM • permalink

  11. You have to admit it’s efficient—Romeo & Juliet, straight from Act II, Scene ii (balcony) to Act V, Scene iii (everyone’s dead). (Although not everyone’s dead.)

    What they were going for is the first bits of “Romeo & Juliet” and the last bits of “Hamlet”.

    Posted by Rob Crawford on 2006 10 19 at 01:31 PM • permalink

  12. Hmmm, I’m guessing “Hamlet” is not a big seller in Pakistan.

    Posted by Mr. Bingley on 2006 10 19 at 01:34 PM • permalink

  13. Mr. Bingley, I suspect Hamlet does well all throughout Dar-al-Islam, but it’s only 10 seconds long:

    Hammaslet: “You killed my father! Prepare to die!”

    Enormous explosion; curtain.

    Posted by SoberHT on 2006 10 19 at 01:46 PM • permalink

  14. # 9 - Thanks Mr B.

    I was just told this last night and it to me about 15 seconds to get it.

    Needless to say, it’s an Australian joke

    Posted by jlc on 2006 10 19 at 02:03 PM • permalink

  15. .. took me ...

    Perview is my fiend

    Posted by jlc on 2006 10 19 at 02:04 PM • permalink

  16. She wanted to get married on Christmas. That’s so sweet. What a moron--he never had to worry about forgetting their anniversary.

    Do feel sorry for her, though.

    Posted by tim maguire on 2006 10 19 at 02:45 PM • permalink

  17. #14 Australian hell.  I got it right away and just forwarded it to my ex-girlfriend at work.  Should be all around Dallas in about a hour. 

    So we court in the states the same way.  Just without a shirt on, and it is immortalized for all time on “cops”.  Other than that.....

    Posted by jeff mccabe on 2006 10 19 at 02:48 PM • permalink

  18. The gene pool dodges another belly flopper.

    Posted by Gary from Jersey on 2006 10 19 at 03:26 PM • permalink

  19. But soft! What blood from yonder balcony drips?

    Posted by mojo on 2006 10 19 at 05:32 PM • permalink

  20. I think the imam would frown on marrying on Infidel Christmas.  That’s probably why he wished to hasten the day.

    Posted by Nightfly on 2006 10 19 at 05:52 PM • permalink

  21. Ahmed, Ahmed, wherefore art though Ahmed?

    Posted by Dan Lewis on 2006 10 19 at 06:17 PM • permalink

  22. #1 Rebecca:  “Haven’t they bothered to ask the imam about gravity?”

    No need to - gravity’s not in the Koranimal.  Therefore it doesn’t exist.

    Posted by Barbara Skolaut on 2006 10 19 at 06:33 PM • permalink

  23. No need to - gravity’s not in the Koranimal.  Therefore it doesn’t exist.

    As far as I can tell, that’s pretty much how it goes. It’s not that it’s the nature of masses to attract each other with a force proportional to their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them; it’s that Allah wills it so, in each and every case. At least until he stops. And he can do so at anytime.

    Posted by Rob Crawford on 2006 10 19 at 06:50 PM • permalink

  24. Dang! Now there’s a sure fire way to get someone’s attention...(rimshot!)

    #8 Nice one

    Posted by Margos Maid on 2006 10 19 at 07:03 PM • permalink

  25. This girl doesn’t realize how lucky she is.  Ii would have been one night after another of premature ejaculation with this idiot.

    Posted by NoAcuteDistress on 2006 10 19 at 08:06 PM • permalink

  26. I followed a link at the bottom to that article which told me:

    An Austrian businessman announced Thursday that he would get rid of urinals shaped like a woman’s mouth from a public toilet near Vienna’s national opera, after facing pressure from politicians who demanded their removal.

    God bless the crazy people in our world.

    Posted by Ian Deans on 2006 10 19 at 08:30 PM • permalink

  27. Wedding cancelled… funeral brought forward.

    Posted by Infidel Tiger on 2006 10 19 at 09:55 PM • permalink

  28. Why was he in such a hurry? The goats on strike?

    Posted by mr magoo on 2006 10 20 at 01:26 AM • permalink

  29. Great stuff on this thread!  Thanks for the laughs.

    Posted by saltydog on 2006 10 21 at 05:14 AM • permalink

    30. Page 1 of 1 pages

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