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WEATHER NORMAL
Reports last month suggested Britain would melt during summer:
It could be time to say goodbye to defining features of British life, like rainy picnics and cloudy sunbathing …
A diligent BBC researcher has discovered that yesterday was the coldest on record for a Test match in England. Temperatures dropped to 7.4C (45F), but it felt colder.
Meanwhile, Australia’s allegedly endangered ski fields seem to be doing just fine:
Victoria’s Alpine region is experiencing the best lead-up to the ski season since 2004, with heavy falls overnight …
“This is great considering it’s two weeks away from opening weekend,” [Mount Buller Resort marketing manager Amber]
Gardner said.
Remember, our planet is just five years away from climate change catastrophe.
This is interesting and was a also a topic of discussion on the British SKY news the other day. The first question, where is the warming if Bank Holiday weekends normally have crappy weather? It was actually warmer in Alaska and Siberia than in the UK on that day. Is that also ‘proof’ of GW? The presenters then spoke about the record drought in 1976. OK, what caused that one?
If the goreble worming straightens their teeth out, I’m going to church.
Posted by richard mcenroe on 2007 05 30 at 12:18 AM • permalinkfrom the allegedly endangered ski fields link
A 2003 CSIRO report, part-funded by the ski industry, found that the resorts could lose a quarter of their snow in 15 years, and half by 2050. The worst case was a 96 per cent loss of snow by mid-century.
Funny. I thought they lost 100% of whatever they got every spring.
I’ve been in england during a “heatwave”, and it’s not for the fainthearted; the mercury rose to the furnace-like level of about 25 degrees C, and as it hadn’t rained for 48 hours a drought was declared. If you had the misfortune to wander into Hyde Park and had neglected to put a pair of welding goggles in your pack, snowblindness was your fate- acres of puffy, pale, dimpled flesh, lying about the grass like the result of an explosion in a tallow plant.
Others with handkerchiefs knotted on their mis-shapen heads frollicked in the shallows of the Serpentine, splashing around the first water their bodies had had contact with since last Autumn.
Almost as disturbing as going out for a drink and waking up next to this.
Ok I got told something weird today that I need a mechanic to sort for me.
We have just started to recieve the new V8 turbo diesel Toyota utes for underground use. I was told that they will become a fairly standard model as the V8 meets EU emmisions standards whereas the 6 cylinder doesnt.
Have I just been told bullshit or is that Bizzaro world of the EU seriously lost the plot?Posted by thefrollickingmole on 2007 05 30 at 01:17 AM • permalinkTotally off topic I’m afraid, but I almost just got killed so it’s important for me:
At 2:30pm, a car sped along the Bourke Street (Melbourne) tram tracks and ran the red light - mid-cycle - at Queen, very narrowly missing me and several other pedestrians, so if anyone sees a royal blue metallic Daewoo Lanos, registration OWW-093 with a broken rear passenger side window, a Jack Lives Here sticker on the rear bumper and two males on board with pirate-style scarves and no teeth, call the cops.
Thanks.
And on a related topic, I have a solution for the Victorian water crisis. According to their water authority, 86% of the water that falls on the state is lost to evaporation and transpiration.
The problem is too many bloody trees. A mature large tree uses as much water as 2 or 3 typical households. Victorians need to fire up their chainsaws and go fix the problem.
#9 Sea Temperatures
Interesting to note that the only areas of all the world’s oceans which show any significant ‘warming’ are those around the big Soviet naval bases of Vladivostok and Murmansk.
Makes you wonder…
Posted by Apparatchik on 2007 05 30 at 02:03 AM • permalink#11- sounds like you stumbled into the middle of a blag. What sort of a loser twocks a Daewoo Lanos as a getaway car? They’d have more credibility trying to out-run the filth in this.
At least they didn’t dunlop anyone, not that they would’ve given a shit. Vermin like that should be “shot while resisting arrest”.
To be fair, the weather is very strange and unpredictable in Europe at the moment.
London 7 degrees, Moscow 31.
Neither is normal for late spring.Posted by Honkie Hammer on 2007 05 30 at 02:13 AM • permalinkAsh: yes, I did report it to the police. I should have said so in this initial comment.
Pickles, I have a mate in the force and he would strongly resemble that remark.
Habib, the Lanos was flying. You can milk a decent speed out of just about anything these days with the added advantage of lightness and manoevrability in a city infested with roundabouts, barriers and other ‘traffic calming’ devices everywhere you look.
O/T, but it looks like there might be some more Rein on Kevnis parade- this could turn ugly for the ferret-faced git.
#24- you can get most things to tootle along these days if you give them enough welly (and are sufficiently chemically relaxed to not notice the fact that it handles like a watermelon truck full of Mexicans) but it probably won’t impress too many of your peers when you wind up in remand for knocking off a Daewoo.
#7 habib
An English heatwave’s no joke.
The elderly expire in mass numbers, the roads melt, the govt issues stay-at-home warnings and there’s a run on suntan lotion (in extreme cases lotions with UV Factors in double digits are sold).
Sometimes, jumpers are removed.
Posted by pommygranate on 2007 05 30 at 02:46 AM • permalink#7 Habib
I too have gazed into the swampy waters of the Serpentine and yes, even taken the obligatory row boat ride. The knotted handkerchiefs and melon coloured faces bring back memories. The green water would have made a cane toad throw up & people were actually swimming amongst the flotsom. Maybe it has been cleaned up since my time.
GW means London will now only have three seasons in one day.
Look, when it comes to British weather, the Guardian has all bases covered.
If it’s warmer than average - global warming pure and simple.
If it’s cooler than normal, it’s a sign that the Gulf stream is shutting down due to… (wait for it)...global warming.Anthony R: I could see neither chests nor parrots, but they had bandanas on.
Habib, they certainly looked chemically relaxed enough not to notice they were six inches from mowing down half of Melbourne’s stockbrokers, legal secretaries and me (no jokes, thanks!).
Ash, the car got hemmed by traffic in at the next intersection before hauling off up Elizabeth and I was able to grab the reg and bumper sticker. Their faces I could see as they sailed past. They were wired.
O/T- Dateline tonight actually had a lead item about a particularly demented band of ROP followers infesting central Islamabad (how’s that for a prophetic name?) and applying their own form of Sha’ria to locals, usally with big waddys.
Pakistan plod seems reluctant to do anything about this gang, who reminded me of another common subcontinental cultwhich prospered until the British army decided their practices were unacceptable.
The adherents of this current silliness continually stated they would give their lives for their cause- I suggest that Musharref take them up on their offer posthaste.
Islamabad (how’s that for a prophetic name?)
Would the opposite of this be Christchurchgood?
Posted by surfmaster on 2007 05 30 at 07:22 AM • permalinkCold killed 25000 in the UK in the “second warmest year in the past 1,000”.
Aaron I looked at the link. It beggars belief.
JQ and his ilk seem to be saying that just because someone from Philip Morris considered using the example of DDT and malaria in an exercise to distract WHO from tobacco, it invalidates the concerns people have that DDT wasn’t used to help control malaria - concerns which long predated 1998 when PM supposedly came up with this strategy.
And his equation - if you criticised the banning of DDT you were only saving 1 to 3 million lives a year but you were helping Philip Morris (god knows in what way) which by selling cigarettes causes 3 to 5 million deaths a year - what can you say to that piece of logic???
And of course PM have been so successful. I mean they’ve totally eradicated anti-smoking advertising and campaigns world wide. Which is why we in Australia smoke in ever increasing numbers, smoking is encouraged in all closed spaces and cigarettes are given away at school canteens.
Can someone educated as JQ is be any more stupid?
#36 The transcipt from the Gore Disaster:
He’s practically standing still now. They’ve dropped ropes out of the nose of Al; and (uh) they’ve been taken ahold of down on the field by a number of men. It’s starting to rain again; it’s—the rain had (uh) slacked up a little bit. Al’s back blast is just holding him (uh) just enough to keep him from—
He’s burst into flames! He burst into flames, and he’s falling, he’s crashing! Watch it! Watch it! Get out of the way! Get out of the way! Get this, Bill; get this, Bill! He’s fire—and he’s crashing! He’s crashing terrible! Oh, my! Get out of the way, please! He’s burning and bursting into flames; and the—and he’s falling on the mooring-mast. And all the folks between this is terrible; this is the worst of the worst catastrophes in the world. [indecipherable] The flames… twenty, oh, four- or five-hundred feet into the sky and it—it’s a terrific crash, ladies and gentlemen. He’s smoke, and he’s flames now; and his enormous head is crashing to the ground, not quite to the mooring-mast. Oh, the humanity and all the global warmers screaming around here. I told you; it—I can’t even talk to people. Their friends are out there. Ah! He’s—he—he’s a—ah! I—I can’t talk, ladies and gentlemen. Honest: he’s just laying there, mass of smoking wreckage. Ah! And everybody can hardly breathe and talk and the screaming. Lady, I—I—I’m sorry. Honest: I—I can hardly breathe. I—I’m going to step inside, where I cannot see it. Bill, that’s terrible. Ah, ah;—I can’t. Listen, folks; I—I’m gonna have to stop for a minute because. I’ve lost my voice. This is the worst thing I’ve ever witnessed.48. 1st in a series I hope, Titanic might be out though, no icebergs you see.
Posted by thefrollickingmole on 2007 05 30 at 09:04 AM • permalink#11 Ilibcc - if you try reporting something like this in sydney, the cops couldn’t be arsed to even take a report.
A guy deliberately swerved at me last year, so I noted his rego and a description of the car and went around to the local copshop.
The young pube behind the counter did everything he could to avoid taking a statement. In the end, to fob me off, he looked up the rego on COPS and then told me it was reported stolen, so they couldn’t do anything about it.
Like hell. I could tell I was being given the flick.
Since the incident happened on the only road out of a peninsular, I simply wandered around the streets of the peninsular on the weekend and - lo and behold! There was the car.
I then had the pleasure of calling the copshop and saying, “You know that car you told me was stolen? Well, it’s outside such and such a house on Bling street.”
Response: “Oh.”
As in, “Oh shit, now we have to do something about it, and how do we cover up the misuse of COPS and lying to the public?”
It’s been a year, and I still can’t get a response out of them as to what happened.
Posted by mr creosote on 2007 05 30 at 09:12 AM • permalink#16—Sure and aren’t we after using the very best rocks and boulders and all?
Posted by richard mcenroe on 2007 05 30 at 09:44 AM • permalink#48 That is so funny in the most macabre way!
Definitely first in a series, I hope.
Titanic is always possible. As the polar caps melt there will still be icebergs floating into shipping lanes.
Or we can do the Poseidon Adventure.
Posted by Nilknarf Arbed on 2007 05 30 at 10:31 AM • permalinkRemember, our planet is just five years away from climate change catastrophe.
Make that 4 years, 11 and a half months!!!11!1!
Posted by Major John on 2007 05 30 at 01:49 PM • permalinkTexas Bob, I lost it completely at “indecipherable”, the men in white suits will be here any minute
As the country basked in warm spring sunshine over the Easter weekend, the new research suggests that it could be time to say goodbye to defining features of British life, like rainy picnics and cloudy sunbathing.
And this is a bad thing? I’m booking my flight for August.
Posted by Wimpy Canadian on 2007 05 30 at 06:40 PM • permalink#5 I don’t know why this yeld out to my brain, but ski fields is an anagram of Fisks lied.
Posted by Wimpy Canadian on 2007 05 30 at 06:45 PM • permalink#48. I’ve just got off the floor.
My daughter might have to be taken to hospital.
We cant’ stop her laughing.
It is the funniest thing I have read in years.
Posted by Macosghair on 2007 05 31 at 05:43 AM • permalink#43. “Cold killed 25000 in the UK in the “second warmest year in the past 1,000”.”
Be careful, moptop. Apparently they used the same methodology as the Lancet did in Iraq. To quote from the article, “The Office for National Statistics said there were 25,700 ‘excess winter deaths’.” Whenever I see that term “excess deaths” I can’t help but hear the warning bells go off. The Lancet claims there were 655,000 “excess deaths” in Iraq without actually documenting anything of the sort. It was a miracle if they actually counted 2000 deaths total. They just used fancy math to turn that small number into the kind of big number they were looking (as well as hoping) for.
#17. I think you misread the map. The areas around Vladivostok and Murmansk showed unusual relative cooling, not warming, if I’m not mistaken. Purple and pink are the coolest colors, not the warmest.
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Now there really is a sure sign that it’s the end of the world: Poms with a tan.