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THE SCRANTON SHOOTIST
Barack Obama’s comments on small-town Pennslyvanians:
“It’s not surprising that they get bitter, they cling to guns or religion or antipathy to people who aren’t like them or anti-immigrant sentiment or anti-trade sentiment.”
Handed these remarks, only one politician on earth could fail to score some serious points - and that’s Hillary Edmund Clinton (D-Undersniperfire), who saw Obama’s bigotry as a chance to tell another of her delightful make-believe stories:
“You know my dad took me out behind the cottage my grandfather built on a little lake called Lake Winola outside of Scranton and taught me how to shoot when I was a little girl,” she said.
“You know some people have continued to teach their children and their grandchildren. It’s part of culture, it’s part of a way of life. People enjoy hunting and shooting because it’s part of who they are, not because they are bitter.”
People also enjoy hunting Hillary Clinton, according to Hillary. Her fond memories of childhood gun lessons don’t exactly square with Clinton’s usual firearm statements:
We have to enact laws that will keep guns out of the hands of children ... think hard about what we can do to make sure that we keep guns out of the hands of children ... It is really important for each of you [kids] to make sure you stay away from guns. If you have guns in your home, tell your parents to keep them away from you ...
Via Max the Cat. Instapundit rounds up the bitterness; Pennsylvania politicos have their say; and bitter small town residents ask for halp.
UPDATE. Regarding a recent reflective Cheney controversy, LL emails: “It’s more obscene than we thought.”
Ordinary American Finds
Something in Common with
the Democrat Candidate:
The Good Book asks us
To love everyone,
But this is one day
I won’t get it done.‘Cuz, Barack, it’s hard
To show Christian love
To bastards who think
God put them above
My family and friends
And all I hold dear;
Don’t say you’re sorry,
I don’t want to hear.And don’t patronize,
That sticks in my craw;
Damn you and your shrew
And damn Harvard Law;
And lest we forget,
God damn that creature
That bigots like you
Like to call ‘Preacher’.So shut your damn mouth,
Don’t even pretend -
Contempt goes both ways;
It’s mutual, friend.Baracky/Hillary’s dismissive comments are accurate in one way: an accurate portrayal of what condescending leftist snobs think of Middle America / Flyover Country.
Posted by Spiny Norman on 2008 04 13 at 10:21 AM • permalinkYeah, The Messiah™ certainly knows who He really wants to talk to, eh?
Posted by The_Real_JeffS on 2008 04 13 at 10:33 AM • permalink“Obviously, if I worded things in a way that made people offended, I deeply regret that.”
“What, me make a blunder? Never!”“Buut, if I did, then I regret the votes it might have lost me”
Posted by Wimpy Canadian on 2008 04 13 at 10:52 AM • permalink#6: Brilliant, Hanyu! The crack Obama made about those gun-totin’ desperadoes dovetails perfectly with the previous frenzied (even strangely expectant) concern expressed by liberals over the likelihood that the Messiah would probably wind up being shot by one of ‘em. Maybe this is Obama’s way of forgiving, beforehand, those who know not what they do. How…Christ-like.
And what’s this bit about the small-town red-necks being “anti-trade”. Isn’t this the man who wants to scrap NAFTA.
Posted by Wimpy Canadian on 2008 04 13 at 10:53 AM • permalinkDummocrat politicians: The gift that keeps on giving.
Posted by Tommy Shanks on 2008 04 13 at 10:54 AM • permalink+An obviously probamaniac is quoted as saying:
My sense is more people believe Obama, rather than McCain or Clinton, understand their lives and the challenges they face on a daily basis.
This is a man who’s wife complains of teh travails of living on her pultry $300,000 per year, let along his Senator’s pittance.
Posted by Wimpy Canadian on 2008 04 13 at 10:56 AM • permalink#3 You should publish a collection of your odes, Lyle.
Posted by Wimpy Canadian on 2008 04 13 at 11:06 AM • permalinkObama was just describing the typical white person. Like his granny.
Posted by Some0Seppo on 2008 04 13 at 11:06 AM • permalinkObama’s criticism of people in Pennsylvania and the mid-West as gun-toting, bible-bashing xenophobic hicks was not highly offensive, but downright stupid as well.
Pennsylvania is a swing State, as are Iowa, Michigan, Minnesota, Missouri and Ohio in the Midwest (at least in theory). That’s six swing States that Obama has managed to insult in one paragraph of speech.
Where can I get decent odds on McCain?
It isn’t only the people of Pennsylvania that Obama insulted, I’m sure we all understand that. It remains to be seen whether this will harm his campaign (as it should), because one of the charms and gifts of Obama is that he can deliver such insults in warm, understanding tones, allowing his elitist disciples to excuse his actual words. And that may be the scariest thing about him.
Wasn’t Keating quoted as having said: ‘Asian countries are the places you fly over on the way to Europe’?
What’s Kevni got to say about that one, hmmm?
Just spent 4 hrs clinging to one of my guns. In this case a Remington special purpose turkey shotgun. My 8 yr. old son was with me as well. I believe this qualifies as at least a twofer.
We were too busy trying to kill a gobbler to practice any xenophobia or thump any bibles , though. I missed a perfect opportunity to hurl racial epithets when we stopped for a light lunch at the taco bell.Perhaps I should have Obama’s’ recent words laminated and displayed prominently in my truck so I’ll know when to react like a typical white redneck. Being a small minded southern bigot is harder than it looks.
Perhaps if I’d had some quality training in say,,,hmmm ,, Chicago. I’ve heard there is a preacher up there that really knows his way around the “race hate” business.
What scares me is that Obama’s campaign is not completely toast at this point. An unreconstructed Marxist, friend of terrorists, mentored by a vile racist for 20 years, and an overt platform of destroying our national security and free economy. Does he have to rape a toddler on live TV or something?
Oh come on guys, Barry Obama and Billary are just being thoughtful. They know that John McCain is 71 years-old, and that non-stop campaigning for the next seven months might be a bit tiring for that fine gentleman. So they’ve got together and decided to do his work for him. One tells a stupid lie (sniper fire), then, when that’s dieing down, the other makes a stupid, insulting comment about a vital group of voters (small-town people). In a week or two it will be Billary’s turn to really screw up, then Barry’s, back and forth until November. People, those two just that damn helpful.
Posted by David Crawford on 2008 04 13 at 12:48 PM • permalinkYeah, because Obama sure ain’t one to go to church every Sunday with a bunch of bitter, xenophobic knuckle-draggers.
#21, Greene,
I hope this turns into a “Whatcha packin’?” comment thread. Me, I’m clutching a Glock 40 with the composite body and standard-cap magazine.
Lunch was a grilled cheese sandwich, properly cut diagonally to form a pair of isoscles triangles. Typical White People love grilled cheese.
Lyle, I usually skip poems, but not yours.
I think the real problem with Obama is that he sees himself as being sort of an accidental American and, stuck with this unpleasant fact, has decided to make the best of things by holding this benighted country’s highest office; no trouble at all, it’s really the least he can do. In any event, this is the impression he made on one of the reporters for Paco Media Enterprises when he was recently interviewed. Here’s a draft of the report by our ace newsman, Skip Trace.
*******
Interview – Part I
After passing through Obama’s security apparatus, consisting not only of Secret Service agents and local police, but also a squad of hefty African-American gentlemen wearing black suits, neckties and dark glasses, I approached Obama’s campaign buses – dubbed the “Care-O-Van” by supporters. The word “buses” doesn’t really do justice to the candidate’s mode of transportation, however. Three top-of-the-line Millenium Luxury Coaches, each vehicle bearing one of the words comprising Obama’s slogan – “Yes We Can!” – were parked in the driveway of Hugo Van Worthington III, a wealthy San Francisco sex toy magnate and financial supporter of Obama’s run for – or rather, royal procession to – the White House. I was told that the “We” coach was Obama’s personal vehicle, so I approached the door, shaded by a gold-fringed, purple awning, and knocked. The door was opened by David Plouffe, Obama’s campaign manager, whom I was startled to see wearing a long green satin robe and a red fez. He seemed slightly embarrassed.Plouffe: Oh…er…heh!...Hello, Skip. Aren’t you a little early?
Me: Right on time, according to my watch. What are you doing in that get-up, Dave?
Plouffe: Well, you see, at the end of a long day, we all like to unwind a bit and get comfortable.
Me: And what better way than dressing up as an Egyptian camel auctioneer; is that it?
Plouffe (speaking in a low, confidential voice): Listen, Skip. Barack jokes about me being his “Grand Vizier”, and he thought that sounded so good that I ought to dress the part – but only in private. That’s all. It’s just harmless fun.
Me ( I entered the door and got a load of Obama’s home away from home; it was like the ceremonial barge of the Doge of Venice, except on wheels: intricate parquetry on the floor, crystal chandeliers, cabinet work of the finest mahogany): Uh, huh. What about those two shirtless Nubians in MJ Hammer pants and turbans, with scimitars in their hands?
Plouffe: Extra security is a necessity. You know as well as I do that Barack is a high-profile target; there are plenty of extremists out there who would jump at the chance to take out the first serious black candidate for president.
Me: You mean like those “bitter” types in Pennsylvania, “clinging” to their guns, waiting for God to shout, “Fire!”?
Interview – Part II
“Who’s there, David?” Obama’s inquiry floated in from the recesses of the coach, seemingly wafting in on the fumes of the incense which filled the air.“It’s Skip Trace, my Lor-, er, Mr Obama. He’s here from Paco Media for an interview.”
“Excellent! Send him in. Do ask him to wipe his feet, though, will you?”
Plouffe led me into a room that put me in mind of the Sublime Porte of Suleiman the Magnificant: oriental carpets, ornately-carved wooden boxes, an elegant silver coffee set. He was sitting on a low chair facing a small table on which was arrayed a variety of crowns, diadems and turbans. He was looking at them pensively, finally taking up the largest one – a golden crown encrusted with fabulous jewels – and holding it out to Plouffe.
“David, send this one to Tiffany’s and have one made to my size. It’s an exact replica of the crown of Alfonso the Wise, which I think would be the perfect thing for summit meetings. Ah, so good to see you, Mr. Trace! Michelle!”
His wife glided into the room, dressed like Scheherazade on her wedding day, all silk pajamas and veils.
“I’d like to introduce you to my wife, Mr. Trace. Michelle, this is Mr. Trace, the famous reporter.”
She extended her hand in a manner that seemed to indicate that I ought to touch my forehead to her fingers. I took it in mine and gave her a traditional handshake, instead. She then withdrew, grabbing a Handi Wipe on the way out.
Me: Thank you, sir, for giving me this opportunity to meet with you. I know how busy you are right now (He waved a deprecatory hand, as if to say, “It is nothing”.)
Obama: We owe it to the people to make our views known. This is a democracy, after all, and if we are to achieve victory, in the end it will be because we have succeeded in breaking through the carapace of prejudice and ignorance that enclose the minds of the voters. ( He took a cigarette from a golden case and fit it into a holder attached to a water-filled hooka; lighting the cigarette, he then puffed contentedly).
Me: Well, sir, there seems to be a fair amount of disagreement on the subject of the typical voter’s so-called “ignorance.” For example, your remarks the other day seemed to imply that you view many traditional values and customs as being nothing more than a pernicious response to straightened economic circumstances.
Obama: I believe I have – and not ungraciously, my friend – apologized for an unhappy choice of words that may have offended those whose intellectual capacity was inadequate to the task of grasping the larger concepts involved.
Me: But that very apology was viewed by many as being, in itself, another instance of condescension ( The water in the hookah suddenly bubbled noisily; I believe I had struck a nerve).
Interview – Part III
Obama: Let us just say that the response to my remarks illustrates the need for a national dialogue on economic policy. Come! Why not move on to matters of more down-to-earth interest to the sort of people who read your newspaper? How do like my coaches? Very democratic, are they not? Let Hillary fly in her chartered planes from one place to another; we shall stay close to the ground – close to the people - motoring about in our humble buses.Me: I’m not sure “humble” is the first word that would occur to me in describing these rather spectacular RV’s. What is in the “Yes” coach?
Obama: My chef and his assistants, my valet de chambre, the Master of the Wardrobe, a few others.
Me: And in the “Can!” van?
Obama: That is for storage; mostly my imported Turkish cigarettes and a selection of the inspirational videos of Reverend Wright. But I hasten to add, I fast-forward through the objectionable parts!
Me: Do you think Senator Clinton will fight out the nomination process all the way to Denver?
Obama: If she does, then she is certain to anger the gods with her hubris.
Me: If she loses to you in Denver, what will you do to rebuild party unity?
Obama: First, I shall have Hillary and her minions strangled with a bowstring, then…
Plouffe suddenly made an appearance; he had undoubtedly been listening from behind the antique Japanese screen
“My, my, look at the time! I’m sorry, Skip, but His Excel-, that is to say, Mr. Obama, has another appointment. Sir, the delegation from the Union of Agnostic Illegal Farm Workers Against Gun Ownership is here.”
Obama: Ah! Finally! I would hear the demands of these justifiably aggrieved de facto citizens, immediately. You will excuse me, Mr. Trace?
I was unceremoniously bustled out of the coach. As I walked down the street to my car, I saw – with, admittedly, a feeling of relief – three somewhat banged-up old second-hand school buses pass by. They were from the McCain campaign, and each vehicle had one word painted on the side. As they roared by, I read, “No, You Won’t!”
Does he have to rape a toddler on live TV or something?
Only if he thinks Pelosi can’t deliver the NAMBLA vote…
Posted by richard mcenroe on 2008 04 13 at 03:23 PM • permalinkI’d say something about Obama’s comments, but I find it difficult to type while clinging to my SIG-229 in .40 S&W.
But I knows thet in ahr neck ‘o the holler we wasnt’ handlin’ no rattlers with the preacher down et the meetin’ hall an we shore didn’t have no shootin’ irons afore that Reagan feller done got voted in.
The whole Obama speech reads like one of Iowahawk’s famous parodies of reporters in search of Red State America.
Posted by Ernst Blofeld on 2008 04 13 at 03:33 PM • permalinkWhatcha Packin thread?..
Good idea Reese. Glock .40, very nice .
Ernst chimes in with the Sig .40 , also a quality piece. I wish the Australians could play this game too. Any chance the Rudd regime will change the draconian gun laws down under ?To elaborate on my turkey gun. It’s a 3 1/2 inch magnum 12 gauge. Shoots 2 1/4 ounces of lead with every trigger squeeze. It tends to wallop the shoulder just about as hard as the target.
Damn fine work Lyle and Paco.
I wish the Australians could play this game too.
They can, as the right to bear arms is inalienable. They might have to be clandestine to “get along.” But these folks are packing certain “lost” arms.
So that’s what a turkey gun does. Neat. “Wallop” is a neat word, too. Ouch!
Ernst, perhaps Iowahawk will repost one his classics. (He’s always looking for excuses to do so.)
Obama’s attempts to mingle with us commoners (such as his bowling stunt) remind me of the publicity stunts pulled by John Effing Kerry in 2004: eating at Wendy’s, goose hunting, etc.
And just as fake. If anything, Obama is snootier than Kerry. It’s just that he is more entertaining than Kerry ever could be.
Posted by The_Real_JeffS on 2008 04 13 at 07:40 PM • permalinkPaco, nice take on Sultan Obama.
If he does indeed elevate to the White House, does it become the White Palace or will White have to go to? Will the Executive Residence become The Harem,
the east wing demolished to make way for a replica of Byzantine Mosque in gold, the West Wing a recreation of the Sun King’s Versailles? Will Sultan Obama be ushered to and from Andrews Air Force Base in a “caravan of 1000 camels resplendent in rubies and emeralds and draped in bright silks”, accompanied by exotic dancers scattering rose pedals to mark his passing and down an avenue of heads of white voters mounted on poles as a warning to Republican voters in 2012.O-man, dear, what can the matter be? Dear, dear, what can the matter be? O-man, dear, what can the matter be? Barack’s so long at the fair. He promised to buy me a bunch of blue ribbons;
He promised to buy me some bonny blue ribbons;
He promised to buy me a bunch of blue ribbons,
To bind up my bonny brown hair.Posted by stackja1945 on 2008 04 13 at 09:49 PM • permalink#40
LOLZ I just found the exact same picture and was going to post it as an example of gingham… and then sayOops! try
this Gingham Dress.Bravo, Paco, bravo!
As for a gun thread, I sadly have nothing to contribute. I do have a very lovely small machete given me by a friend who recently traveled to Jamaica. And the fifth-year anniversary of my last psychiatric hospital admission recently passed, which means I can now buy guns in some states. God bless America.
Posted by Tungsten Monk on 2008 04 14 at 06:28 PM • permalink
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Wildlife died, Hillary lied!