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STANDARD VACATION
It’s twelve days and counting since we last heard from Iowahawk:
Off to Mexico for a spell, chasing a story for Garage Magazine. I must remain tight-lipped, but can tell you my assignment involves Ed “Big Daddy” Roth, Pancho Villa, nuclear radiation, lost treasure, Mexican carnival sideshows, Tom Wolfe, alien autopsies, satanists, tequila, John Wesley Hardin, chupacabras, Aztec blood sacrifice, Mexican outlaw biker gangs, my dad, Pershing missiles, porn shops, peyote, Billy the Kid, eating brains, and a cursed hot rod.
I am not making any of this up.
Pray for me.
I don’t believe the part about tequila; Iowahawk wouldn’t drink that stuff, he’s too smart.
Posted by The_Real_JeffS on 2007 10 31 at 09:16 AM • permalinkI reckon he’s attempting to put 1,000,000 450cubic inch V8s into the Pyramid of Cholula as his entry for the 2008 “World of Speed” at Bonneville
Posted by cwxyzallen on 2007 10 31 at 09:25 AM • permalinkEating brains?
What’s he doing? Hanging out with Alton Brown?
Posted by joe bagadonuts on 2007 10 31 at 11:07 AM • permalink(With a look of disappointment, wronwright quietly and ever so subtlely places the photo album of his trifecta Jamestown/Yorktown/Washington DC dream vacation back into his briefcase).
Posted by wronwright on 2007 10 31 at 12:03 PM • permalinkMexico? Old or New?
Possibly New Mexico, Rebecca, since Iowahawk mentions Pershing missiles, and White Sands Missile Range, in New Mexico, is where they tested the Pershing I and Pershing II missiles (scroll down to the Pershing links, I can’t link the photos).
Maybe Iowahawk is trying to boost a booster to improve the performance of his car?
Posted by The_Real_JeffS on 2007 10 31 at 12:25 PM • permalinkIs he going to Mexico or to Nuevo York ?
Posted by Harry Bergeron on 2007 10 31 at 01:26 PM • permalinkHe left out the Meskin Pirate Radio Stations…
Posted by richard mcenroe on 2007 10 31 at 03:07 PM • permalinkIt’s what Hawk’s not saying that’s most revealing. He’s going to meet up with Uncle Joe Grandi to pursue retrospective action against the originators of the Mexican Wave.
He has my full support.
Posted by Tony.T.Teacher on 2007 10 31 at 07:56 PM • permalinkA long-lost Big Daddy Roth car, the Orbitron, was discovered recently in Mexico.
Maybe he’s in search of a Religious Vision?
Posted by richard mcenroe on 2007 10 31 at 09:45 PM • permalinkI warned him of the pitfalls of timeshare vacations.
Posted by Infidel Tiger on 2007 10 31 at 10:15 PM • permalinkSpeaking of midgits, I caught a few minutes of Barney the lefto pinko dinosaur which my daughter was watching as cute colours on the tv, when across the scene walked a midgit couple. I nearly fainted!
This was during a program showing how the normal kids (1 token black kid, who could dance better than the token white kids)incoporate the wheelchair bound kid into a game of hide and seek.
They also had some old bird using sign language to some kid in the background.
The only minority things missing were:
asian kids / adults
a lesbian couple
a gay couple
a kafiya wearing kid
a native IndianAmerican
a hippieDo they feature in upcoming episodes?
Just how many minorities does this show cater to?
Poor Iowahawk, sacrificing himself for the greater parody.
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If he’d found a one-legged lesbian midget, it would be my kinda holiday.