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SILENCE OF THE BEARS

This week’s Continuing Crisis column for The Bulletin reveals that, while the world’s press recently went crazy over three apparent instances of polar bear cannibalism, the slaughter of some 700 bears every year is ignored. Why? Why?

Posted by Tim B. on 06/20/2006 at 10:37 PM
  1. Maybe they’ve been inhaling something that they shouldn’t be:
    http://tinyurl.com/r22hy

    Posted by andycanuck on 2006 06 20 at 11:07 PM • permalink

  2. #1: Bear repellent! Hilarious!

    Posted by paco on 2006 06 20 at 11:21 PM • permalink

  3. Lions have been eating same species young for years, as have other animals… so global cooling  glowball warmering climate change has been going on much longer than we have been led to believe…

    Posted by kae on 2006 06 20 at 11:24 PM • permalink

  4. O/T

    Greenpeace Spokes Wombat just on the radio speaking about anti-desalination - ‘cos of all the super salt salinated water left over which will kill creatures.*

    OK, so what the hell is the solution? Just stop drinking?

    * I would have thought that with all the ice melting and the polar bears drowning, there’d be plenty of water to dilute the saline byproduct of desalination.

    Posted by kae on 2006 06 20 at 11:28 PM • permalink

  5. Do you get a free drop if your tee shot is interfered with by a bear?

    Posted by Harry Eagar on 2006 06 21 at 12:13 AM • permalink

  6. well i’m sure we know the reason, that apart from a few regular international targets that get blamed for everything no matter how peripheral or illusory their involvement, practically everyone else who isn’t a developed “western” country gets a free pass….

    thats why we get berated by the feminists, while much of the middle east and africa barely rate a limp tirade for their backward views and traditions…  our civil rights wetblankets are all over gitmo like a rash and the henious abuse of human rights, but once again you never here anything about the real serial abusers of human rights, religious freedoma, freedom of speech and practitioners of racism….

    and our noble indigenous folk can hunt endangered species here in Oz, like others in various places with impunity, yet a few polar bears eating each other is proof positive that the West in general, and the US in particular, is tipping the world into the abyss….

    its not so much your actions that make you a target as who you are…  once your in the sites of these dropkicks they just make the facts suit their preoccupations, while any other inconvenient facts are filtered out….

    Posted by casanova on 2006 06 21 at 12:27 AM • permalink

  7. New favorite quote seems to fit in here:

    “Dumb as a box of rocks, and not the normal ones, the really dumb ones”. Heard it tonight on a Rescue Me rerun.

    Posted by Grimmy on 2006 06 21 at 12:30 AM • permalink

  8. dunno if you heard it last night on ABC news in any other states, but on the one here in WA they had a story about a couple (or 3) US soldiers who had been charged with killing iraqi prisoners….  i think some soldier blew the whistle that they weren’t shot while escaping and the presenter said that the soldiers had been charged over their “revenge killings”...

    low and behold the next story up was about saddam and how the prosecutor was demanding the death penalty for what the presenter described as his “revenge killings” at whatever that town was that he killed all those people at…

    i thought that was a bit too cute by half using the same term for each of the stories to try and make an obvious link to the conduct of the US troops and saddam’s behaviour being equivalent…  ABC pricks….

    Posted by casanova on 2006 06 21 at 01:07 AM • permalink

  9. A government program is needed to compensate ingenious people for not killing polar bears.  I propose a bounty of $10,000 per un-killed polar bear.  Since not killing polar bears is an important social and environmental goal having world wide benefits, an aggressive well funded plan is needed to not kill polar bears.  It should start out small; say not killing 10,000 polar bears per year and the program should rapidly grow to at least not killing 100,000 polar bears per year.  In this way, within one generation, millions and millions of polar bears will not be killed.

    Posted by perfectsense on 2006 06 21 at 02:24 AM • permalink

  10. perfect, whose the bounty paid too???  i agree to not shoot 5 polar bears (difficult down here in Australia anyway) does that mean i can claim $50k????

    Posted by casanova on 2006 06 21 at 02:39 AM • permalink

  11. Best column yet, Tim.

    Posted by Dave S. on 2006 06 21 at 04:18 AM • permalink

  12. #10 No problem, to collect the bounty all you need is an official government ID and sworn declaration that you did not kill a polar bear (limit 10 non-killed bears per declaration).  Thanks to America’s swelling illegal immigrant population, government IDs can be bought on the internet for about $50.00 (shipping and handling extra).

    AA program similar to this has worked great for over 70 years for all the wheat we don’t grow in the USA.  Last year, I did not grow enough wheat to feed Sudan.

    Posted by perfectsense on 2006 06 21 at 04:28 AM • permalink

  13. I haven’t done a damned thing. 

    Where’s my money?

    Posted by ushie on 2006 06 21 at 07:03 AM • permalink

  14. Do you get a free drop if your tee shot is interfered with by a bear?

    It depends on whether you still have any balls or not.

    Posted by andycanuck on 2006 06 21 at 08:33 AM • permalink

  15. You know, I wondered what happened at the petting zoo.

    Posted by RebeccaH on 2006 06 21 at 09:26 AM • permalink

  16. Ushie 13

    I haven’t done a damned thing.
    Where’s my money?

    I’ve done THRICE as little as her, and for me?, so far?, BUPKIS!!  What is the DEAL HERE??

    Trouble 14

    I wondered what happened at the petting zoo.

    Those signs didn’t just appear by themselves, you know!

    Posted by Huck Foley on 2006 06 21 at 08:35 PM • permalink

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