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RUDD VS RUDD
While avoiding a debate with John Howard, Kevin Rudd continues debating himself, as Annabel Crabb observes:
A Rudd press conference is generally an event at which the Opposition Leader avoids everybody’s questions apart from his own. It starts off sensibly enough, with journalists asking the questions and Rudd - talentedly, articulately and at considerable length - failing to answer them. But after a while he starts dealing a few light self-interrogatories into the mix.
“Am I an economic conservative? Yes. Do I support tax cuts wherever it’s fiscally responsible to deliver them? You bet.” Etcetera.
Next he’ll be wearing a hand puppet.
UPDATE. Kevin Rudd’s first speech to Parliament, November 1998:
For nearly a decade now it has become fashionable to accept the death of ideology, the triumph of neoclassical economics, the politics of convergence and the rise of managerialism.
Put crudely, it is the view that, because parties of the traditional
Right and traditional Left have now moved to some mythical place called the `Centre’, all that is left is an essentially technocratic decision between one team of managers against another, both operating within a common, or at least similar, mission statement.Politics on this argument becomes little more than theatre - a public performance necessary to convince the shareholders at the AGM that the company needs new management.
I disagree, and I disagree fundamentally.
Rudd’s 2007 campaign slogan: New Leadership.
This guy is supposed to clean Howard’s clock? What is are the media pundits smoking?
What kind of questions are they asking on these public opinion polls that have Rudd way out in front?
???
Posted by Spiny Norman on 2007 10 16 at 08:41 PM • permalinkNic
Sounds as though someone thinks the worm needs burping?
Posted by thefrollickingmole on 2007 10 16 at 08:41 PM • permalinkIn all seriousness, he just doesn’t sound like leadership material.
Posted by AlburyShifton on 2007 10 16 at 08:44 PM • permalink#1 Nic
The ” ” you are wracking your brain for is “nigger.”
I’ll never forget getting lost in West Virginia years back, and driving up to a sign that read, “Nigger Hollow.” Talk about un-PC! I was hearing Dueling Banjos in my head.
And remember, “The sheriff is a ni!...”
“The Right-Handed Sock-Puppetry of the Left” sounds like a Tim Blair book title to me.
Annabel’s observation about Rudd’s rhetorical style is the same as Infidel Tiger made yesterday (at #13 in Mr No Show) but with the best bits taken out.
Posted by Margos Maid on 2007 10 16 at 08:56 PM • permalink#9
Rudd v Rudd?
He might win that one.
Imagine losing that one!
Posted by AlburyShifton on 2007 10 16 at 08:57 PM • permalinkI have an employee who also frequently communicates ideas by asking questions and then answering them. Positively drives me nuts.
Hey, O/T, but I think Che was the last Guevara we’ll be seeing on a t-shirt.
Rudd:
Goodday, Kev!
Oh, Hello Kev!
How are yer Kev?
Bit crook, Kev.
Where’s Kev?
He’s not here, Kev.
Blimey, s’hot in here, Kev.
S’hot enough to boil a monkey’s bum!
That’s a strange expression, Kev.
Well Kev, I heard the Prime Minister use it. S’hot enough to boil a monkey’s bum in ‘ere, your Majesty,’ he said and she smiled quietly to herself.
She’s a good Sheila, Kev and not at all stuck up.
Ah, here comes the Bossfella now! - how are you, Kev?Apologies to the Python gang.
#9 kae
Rudd v Rudd?
He might win that one.
#12 AlburyShifton
Imagine losing that one!
Posted by Spiny Norman on 2007 10 16 at 10:36 PM • permalinkDear Mr. Rudd,
I am in the second grade in America and my history teacher gave us a signment to write to a famous person in another country and ask them questions so we can write a bigography of them. I choze you. Can you please answer these questions?
1) What’s it like to live in a car? Isn’t it kind of hard to take a bath? Is that why it looks like you never shampoo your hair?
2) I read in the newspapers and on some blogs like Tim Blair (he’s my favorite!) that you are afraid to debate John Howard. Does it hurt your feelings when people call you a chickin? Timmy Johnson called me a chickin on the playground the other day because I didn’t want to jump off the top of the swing set so I pulled my boot dagger out and I said How would you like to see what your liver looks like, Timmy?, and he hasn’t called me a chickin no more. You might try that with John Howard (free tip).
3) I heard that you like Pole dancing. Are there many Polocks in Australia?
4) Why do you keep your forks in the road in Australia? My mom keeps them in a drawer.
5) I read that your wife owned a big business and she had to throw it away because you are running for congress. Wouldn’t it be cheaper for her to keep her big business so you can move from a car into a real house?
6) Tim Blair says that you like to ask questions and answer them. Can you do that now? I have an arithmetic test next Wensdy and it would really save me some time if you just ask yourself four or five more questions and answer them. Thanks.
Your friend,
Paco in America
14 Paco
Hey, O/T, but I think Che was the last Guevara we’ll be seeing on a t-shirt.
Jesus, It’s Ms. Piggy, in real life.
I have an employee who also frequently communicates ideas by asking questions and then answering them. Positively drives me nuts.
Let me guess…The named is “Karnac The Magnificent.”
O/T
Geezzuus!! Guess whos persona non Grata at the ABC ultimo offices?Terrorists, not the media, make Muslims look bad
With a headline like that shes toast.An interesting looking conference she was at Here.
Though looking at a few of the attendees and some of the “overviews” of some of the speakers doesn’t inspire a lot of confidence.Posted by thefrollickingmole on 2007 10 16 at 11:16 PM • permalinkThe worm is reported to be back despite the fact that the worm has not yet committed to taking part in the debate. I know - it’s confusing.
Posted by Margos Maid on 2007 10 16 at 11:35 PM • permalinkNext he’ll be wearing a hand puppet.
If KRudd loses the election, he could always go work for Glenn Greenwald. I hear he needs a good stand in blogger.
Posted by The_Real_JeffS on 2007 10 17 at 12:09 AM • permalinkAt least he’s not referring to himself in the third person. Yet. “Is Kevin Rudd an economic conservative? Yes, he sure is. Does he support tax cuts wherever it’s fiscally responsible to deliver them? You bet he does.” A hand puppet would be a nice touch.
Posted by Kyda Sylvester on 2007 10 17 at 01:39 AM • permalinkAnnabel’s observation about Rudd’s rhetorical style is the same as Infidel Tiger made yesterday (at #13 in Mr No Show) but with the best bits taken out.
The observation of the question/answer technique was also made by a cartoonist in the SMH about a month or two ago.
Posted by Abu Chowdah on 2007 10 17 at 05:20 AM • permalinkHi I’m Kevin Rudd from Queensland.
Do I think the media have given me a free ride?
Well, yes. But don’t let that cat out of the bag.
Have I threatened and bullied journalists to give me favourable coverage? Of course! But if you f%*&(^g repeat that I will f$#^&$g kill you.
Will I destroy this country?
Well I will support my union mates and that my friend is this great country.
His habit of asking himself questions, and then answering, makes me think that this is a response to the fact that would talk to him, or even wanted to be near him; so he had these intense but pathetic little conversations with himself.
And people must have gone to great lengths to avoid talking to him, considering he lived with his family in a car. What did they do - all opt for the boot!Posted by Toiling Mass on 2007 10 17 at 08:17 AM • permalink#45
At least he’s not referring to himself in the third person. Yet.
“Et tu, Julia.”
Posted by flying pigs over mecca on 2007 10 17 at 09:31 AM • permalinkA Day in the Life of The Kruddster
Act I, Scene I
[A strip of Queensland sunlight beams through a gap in the curtains of an East facing waterside Sunshine Beach mansion. Australia’s leader in waiting, cuddled up to his favourite Hu Jintao doll, stirs. A string of saliva hangs precariously between his bottom lip and the tip of his thumb which rests on his rosy cheek]
Kevni [muttering sweet nothings in Mandarin Chinese]: Ni hao ma? Wo hao ma? Kevvy hao ma? Kevvy hao…
[The bedside clock ticks over to 5.15am.]
Therese [calling from her bedroom at the other end of the house]: KEEEVVVVINNN!!!!
[Kevni sits bolt upright in bed with dishevelled hair]
Therese: WHAT THE F*CK IS THIS?!! F*CKING BUSH WEEK OR SOMETHING!?! My f*cking alarm went off 15 minutes ago!!!
[Kevni rolls out of bed onto the floor, leaps to his feet, grabs his glasses from the bedside table, slips on the polished Indonesian hardwood floors, recovers, and scurrys toward the door]
Kevni [singing out]: Mo-rning sweet pea! Is Kevin aw-a-ke? Yes, he i-s.
Therese: While you’ve been lying there having wet dreams about duckface..wozza name…the fugly one…Julia Gillard, I’ve already taken advantage of the latest government legislation by firing a dozen low-skilled desk jockeys and screwing the public purse for fifteen thousand bucks by hiding a bunch of retarded losers from the unemployment stats…
Kevni: Does Kevin appreciate that his wife carries him through life? If you said “no”. [singing] You’d be wr-o-ng.
Therese:...And what the hell have you done?! Bugger. All. It’s time to get your lazy arse out of bed and get yourself into The Lodge! And before you do that, make me some f*cking french toast! You better start making yourself useful, or, I swear, you’ll be living out of a f*cking boot car again…
Kevni [scurrying down the 100 yard hallway and into the kitchen]: Is Kevin making the french toast as we speak? Is Kevin going to be the next PM? Are the Rudd’s going to be living in the Lodge by Christmas? Does Kevin ever want to sleep on the back seat of a car again amongst all the empties of Bundy Rum? Yes, yes, yes and no.
Kevni [opens the fridge]: Does Kevin Rudd want to make french toast? Hmmm? Does Kevin Rudd want to avoid a horrible death involving an egg beater? Hmmm? Hmmm? He’d be lying he didn’t? Does Kevin Rudd need two eggs, a bottle of milk and a loaf of sliced bread to start the day?
[Kevni takes two eggs, a bottle of milk and sliced bread]
Kevni: You bet, Kev.
TBC
Lateline tonight, Tony Jones actually went a bit hard on Julia Gillard compared to his usual let-offs of ALP figures. She had very pink cheeks towards the end of the interview, clearly under a bit of stress despite maintaining the dalek drone.
Jones at one stage pressed on labor’s tax policy and couldn’t get an answer. Apparently Swanee is still trying to find the pencil sharpener.
He did make a bad gaffe though, asking what “we [pause] you would do” about alternative spending of tax money.
Also, julia’s hair is less red now and she seems to be a botox devotee, as her face doesn’t move and she seems unable to smile like a real person.
Did daleks ever smile in a past life, or do they have botox too?
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I love me who do you love Kev? Well I love me too Kev. Wow, what a coincidence, let’s be friends!
It reminds me of that scene from Blazing Saddles, nobody move or the ” ” gets it.