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ROOT CAUSE: CAPTAIN COOK

Traceeeeee Hutchison—an occasional Age correspondent whose work has featured here before—recalls a visit to Sydney’s satanic racist beaches:

Our day in the surf was cut short just beyond the shore break when one of its notorious tattooed locals paddled up to me and, with his face just centimetres from mine, demanded to know what the f—k we thought we were doing at his beach and made it clear we should leave the water immediately.

It rocked us to the core. I’d never seen such anger in anyone’s eyes, especially so close, and it seemed so horribly at odds with the appeal of communing with nature in the surf. We did what women generally do when they are verbally abused or taunted by men. We removed ourselves.

So much for racism, then; seems the locals hate everybody, including dizzy white ABC chicks. By the way, how did Tracee know this chap was a local? Did those tattoos list his address?

Is it useful, or just plain trite, to ask where, when and how did we get it so horribly wrong? Is it hopelessly simplistic to reduce these events to ugly tribal clashes between underemployed men?

If underemployment is a factor, expect dole gal Tracee to lash out any minute in a frenzy of ugly tribalism. Too late; it’s already happened! Tracee continues:

Is it more accurate to describe it as the byproduct of a generation of people whose views have been shaped by the culture of fear and loathing that has been masquerading as national leadership for the past decade?

No, it isn’t.

I can’t help wondering if it is merely a coincidence that the site of this week’s final loss of national innocence also marks the birthplace of the systematic destruction of our indigenous population.

Here we go ...

Its original inhabitants, the Dharawal nation, knew Cronulla as Kurrawulla the place of small, pink, seashells - and their stories can be found in the 1000-year-old shell middens beneath Cronulla’s sandy shorelines, the same dunes that Captain Cook and his men wandered across, gathering samples of flora and fauna and “studying” local Aboriginal culture.

Nice sneer quotes. Cook was so unenlightened!

We can’t ignore it any longer. But I wonder if it might mean that we are a little closer to digging deeper to the real first-history of this country.

Surfers and Lebanese attack each other, so Tracee thinks we need to examine settlement. Makes sense.

To perhaps begin a path together that addresses the root of our national disquiet.

“National disquiet”. That phrase rings a bell.

Our problem with living together in harmony is not with multiculturalism. Our national disquiet started over 200 years ago and lives on as a national disgrace.

“National disquiet” ... there it is again. I know where we’ve heard that before; from The Guardian’s stupid Bernard O’Riordan, who seems to be in lock-step with Tracee:

In reality, Australia’s national disquiet started more than 200 years ago when Cook and his crew confronted Aborigines in Botany Bay.

I’d address this at further length, but right now I’m packing for my return to Scotland. Taking all family members with me, of course. Must do something to repair our “national disquiet”.

(Via Anthony Leach)

Posted by Tim B. on 12/19/2005 at 11:57 AM
  1. Tracee has missed the point again.  It’s the Jews who are responsible.  It is a historical fact that Captain Cook was the first Zionist.

    Posted by Mystery Meat on 2005 12 19 at 01:16 PM • permalink

  2. I’d address this at further length, but right now I’m packing for my return to Scotland.

    tim, as a word of advice, padlock and chain your house.  Especially your stock of bitter and beer.  Might be a good idea to take Stoop Davy Dave, Michael Lonie, kae, arbed nilfnarf, and several others with you.  To watch over them.  Preferably with a large caliber weapon within easy reach.

    Might as well tell Karl to have the neocon clean up crew on stand by.  I wonder if FEMA felt like this when Hurricane Katrina was approaching?

    Posted by wronwright on 2005 12 19 at 01:58 PM • permalink

  3. The Kangaroo Mollusks did not survive Cook’s crew.

    Posted by rhhardin on 2005 12 19 at 02:45 PM • permalink

  4. Tim, you should find the surfers in Scotland to be a friendlier bunch.

    Posted by Mystery Meat on 2005 12 19 at 02:49 PM • permalink

  5. The U.S. out of North America!!

    Oh, wait.  That’s a different deal, isn’t it.

    Posted by RebeccaH on 2005 12 19 at 03:24 PM • permalink

  6. You can shape a generation in only a decade? Who knew?

    Posted by Nathan on 2005 12 19 at 03:48 PM • permalink

  7. So, when is Traceeeeee going to do the right thing, and return to her ancestral homeland, so there’s more room for the Aborigines?

    Posted by The_Real_JeffS on 2005 12 19 at 03:59 PM • permalink

  8. I have a friend who enjoys tracing all the strife on Earth today back to the introduction of sliced bread.  His point is that you can blame anything on anything if you pick and choose your data.  He does a very good job of it.

    Posted by MikeTheLibrarian on 2005 12 19 at 04:11 PM • permalink

  9. just the usual black arm band view of history from the hate australia crowd.

    Posted by vinny on 2005 12 19 at 04:28 PM • permalink

  10. Tracee?  Remember the Elvis Costello song “Brilliant Mistake”?

    “She said that she was working for the ABC News; that was as much of the alphabet as she knew how to use…”

    Posted by Mitch on 2005 12 19 at 05:03 PM • permalink

  11. Trace would like to comment further in the meeja, but she is busy attempting to survive on $200 per week. Now, if she had one of those paternalistic sugar daddies, she would be good to go. As it is, she’s going to have to trade 20 years experience as an opinionista to get a gig flipping burgers somewhere.

    Posted by CB on 2005 12 19 at 05:03 PM • permalink

  12. Tracee displys little argument nor logic in her piece to support her own opinions ... I find it hard to believe it was printed in a national newspaper ... and I wonder if the notorious tattooed local was made up ... some lazy journalists have done so before ... anyway I’ve never heard or seen locals referred to as notorious or tatooed ... I’m sure some of them are ... I’m a local and I’m neither ... one of Cronulla’s problems is the violence, booze and drugs culture common to many seaside towns around Australia ... and nearly all of it is imported ... whether they’re there just for the day or been there the last 6 months or even 6 years ... the police have to do their job and take control ... in Cronulla and elsewhere ...

    Posted by Stevo on 2005 12 19 at 05:11 PM • permalink

  13. Good thing for Tracee this story isn’t checkable. I smell more than a little Jayson Blair influence in this piece.

    I’ve not once seen a woman told to leave a beach by a “local”. Surfies might get territorial if a stranger drops in on them in the breakers, but verbally attack a woman minding her own business on the sand?

    She’s flat-out lying. That didn’t happen.

    Posted by Mike Jericho on 2005 12 19 at 05:11 PM • permalink

  14. My, Traceee is a fine Margo replacement.

    Posted by m on 2005 12 19 at 05:30 PM • permalink

  15. “Our day in the surf was cut short just beyond the shore break when one of its notorious tattooed locals paddled up to me and blah, blah, blah”

    The first part of this story (as quoted) tells us that the stupid bitch was outside the flags (swimming area) and in the surfboards area of the beach (which is why the guy paddled up to her) - she was in a great deal of danger of being hit and injured by a board - the riders were no doubt pissed off that she was there screwing it up for everyone.

    Posted by Harry Buttle on 2005 12 19 at 05:55 PM • permalink

  16. In reality, Australia’s national disquiet started more than 200 years ago when Cook and his crew confronted Aborigines in Botany Bay.

    Sounds like the first “grim milestone.”

    Posted by Patricia on 2005 12 19 at 05:58 PM • permalink

  17. Tracee’s account sounds like BS. Suspicious that an unemployed or “underemployed” journalist had such an experience. And she’s never caught a wave either. “it seemed so horribly at odds with the appeal of communing with nature in the surf” Oh my breakfast.

    Posted by JoeJr on 2005 12 19 at 06:42 PM • permalink

  18. Well, as a surfer, I can attest to the fact that surf culture includes some real aggro dickheads, so Tracee’s experience is not surprising, and I’d believe it to be true. Surfers can be real territorial fuckwits - the “locals only” mentality is rife, and in some ways is even stronger in places like Byron Bay. 

    Tracee was naive to think that surfers were all kind, amiable hippies doing it for the love of nature and shared outdoor experience.

    Posted by closeapproximation on 2005 12 19 at 06:51 PM • permalink

  19. Pay no attention to Wronwright, Tim.  He’s just mad because the last time we had a party for all the neocons, at…um…an undisclosed location like the ones Dick Cheney goes to, he got there late and all the canapes were gone.

    I’m afraid I’m going to have to have a discussion with Mister Karl about Wronwright’s continued suitability for clandestine work.  He seems a bit erratic.  Letting him use the time machine and have access to the orbital lasers may be unwise.

    Posted by Michael Lonie on 2005 12 19 at 07:34 PM • permalink

  20. She forgot to mention that this particular surfer had parachuted from an airplane wearing a Richard Nixon mask.

    (Tracee really needs to be more selective with her choice of movie when she gets whacked on magic mushies, obviously Point Break wasn’t the wisest choice)

    Posted by HC44 on 2005 12 19 at 07:48 PM • permalink

  21. I’m surprised she didn’t work in a reference to old growth logging, as well. Wasn’t that Captain Cook’s fault also? And it’s not too much effort to link those white Anglo male surfies of Cronulla to the white Anglo Tassie loggers, who after all massacred the Aborigines, just like the Cronulla yobs beat up the Lebs - a kind of latter-day Aborigine. 

    Now, how can we work in a reference to George Bush and Iraq?

    I feel Tracee has the beginings of a great Master’s thesis here. What, you mean it’s already been done?

    Posted by mr magoo on 2005 12 19 at 07:49 PM • permalink

  22. Hmm… a padlock… liquid notrogen, check, ballpeen hammer, check, can opener and corkscrew, check…

    Posted by richard mcenroe on 2005 12 19 at 08:34 PM • permalink

  23. True to form for both Traceee and The Age she managed to work an ‘its all John HoWARd’s fault’ angle into her fantasy/story.

    We have seen it at its bleakest hour this week, with the nerve-jangling, and ominous, words of a prime ministerial victory speech providing the soundtrack: “We will decide who comes to this beach.”

    Posted by Harold on 2005 12 19 at 09:13 PM • permalink

  24. She was probably attempting to interview these vile, racist surfers while they were trying to catch waves. With several kilometers of beach, and plenty of patrolled surfboard-free zones, most people don’t go bobbing their stupid heads amongst the pointy, sharp-finned surfboards (unless of course they’re actually looking for trouble).

    But the real revelation is here: She can read seashells! All this time we thought there was no accurate record of aboriginal history.

    Posted by Henry boy on 2005 12 19 at 09:49 PM • permalink

  25. Would you mind if I closed that tag for you? </i>

    There, that’s better.

    Posted by TimT on 2005 12 19 at 10:25 PM • permalink

  26. Or maybe not ...

    I don’t want to see what this is going to do to Tim’s italic’s budget.

    Posted by TimT on 2005 12 19 at 10:26 PM • permalink

  27. #19 Michael:

    Agent Wron is actually quite responsible with the orbital lazers…It’s just the lake effect graviton generators he’s been somewhat iffy deploying.

    Anyway, we’ve been lighting cigarettes with those beamers for two millenia…At least.

    Doing our part for Glowball Vorming.

    Posted by monkeyfan on 2005 12 19 at 11:03 PM • permalink

  28. Pimf: Lazers = Lasers
    ...May explain why I screwed my last Assistant Junior Subaltern technical review.

    Posted by monkeyfan on 2005 12 19 at 11:08 PM • permalink

  29. On a topical note…

    In reality, Australia’s national disquiet started more than 200 years ago when Cook and his crew confronted Aborigines in Botany Bay.

    In the spirit of Bernard O’Riordan’s sense of ‘egalitarian fraternity’, the Grauniad’s fine staff should start a letter spamming campaign to rename Botany Bay to Racist Colonial Oppressor Bay?

    It could be another Operation Clark County moment - Australian style.

    Posted by monkeyfan on 2005 12 20 at 12:05 AM • permalink

  30. #27, 28 monkeyfan,
    I don’t know. Wronwright seems very hostile recently towards other members of The Organization.  If that alien invasion we’ve been warned about comes we’ll need to be absolutely certain which direction those lasers are shooting.  Also you should see his expense reports for the trips in the time machine.  Talk about creative writing.

    Posted by Michael Lonie on 2005 12 20 at 03:58 AM • permalink

  31. Tracee . . . get a job. But first learn to spell Tracy (or Tracey).

    Posted by Oafish and Infantile on 2005 12 20 at 06:05 AM • permalink

  32. #2 Wronwright, I can go to Scotland? How cool - I love Scotland.

    Great drinking on Glasgow.

    Posted by Nilknarf Arbed on 2005 12 20 at 06:27 AM • permalink

  33. #2

    pssst
    party at Tim’s..

    BYOG (he might run out…)

    see youse there!

    Posted by kae on 2005 12 20 at 08:29 AM • permalink

  34. So she was a Rosebud local who had “come home to heal” via the crisp,clean air..
    Coulda got a job in adland.
    She managed to ingratiate herself with the customer service person (o a man called Peter)-“we discussed..” as opposed to the despised bogans who really NEEDED the money.
    She took a swipe at Kennet and another at Costello-always a popular move with the public service and generally showed how very above it all she was-Cennalink that is ...so terribly common, darlings.Slumming it.

    Posted by crash on 2005 12 20 at 10:06 AM • permalink

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