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REPORTS DOUBTED, BRIEFLY
A spokesman for the Damascus headquarters of Hamas terror chief Khaled Meshaal said Tuesday night he doubted reports that Fatah-linked terrorists had threatened to kill Hamas leaders.
Violence between Hamas and Fatah resumed Wednesday morning as Muhammad Uda, a local Hamas leader, was shot to death as he was exiting morning prayers ...
(Via J.F. Beck)
I say chaps, carry on. Good show, keep up the good work, etc. etc…
Posted by Wimpy Canadian on 2006 10 04 at 11:22 AM • permalinkFatwa math
Achmed: “Now, how does it go? The enemy of my enemy is my enemy.”
Farouk: “No no no, you donkey. The friend of my friend is my enemy’s friend.”
Ali: “Both of you are like goats upon a trash heap, noisily chewing three-day old garbage. Listen to me, my brothers. In truth, it is, The friend of my enemy’s friend, less one enemy, twice removed, carry a friend, is my cousin’s sister’s ... sorry, I think I’ve messed it up somewhere. Let me start again ... “
Achmed: “Wait, I think I have it. When my friend is my enemy, I must kill him.”
Farouk: “Quiet, jackass. It goes thusly. The fleas upon my enemy’s camel itch equally as those upon the camel of my friend.”
Achmed: “Who are you calling jackass, you vendor of sneezed-upon shawerma!”
Farouk: “Why, I’ll show you, you handshaker of Jews!”
Ali: “Hmmm, both of my friends are now enemies. I must ... smite both of them?”
(cartoon explosions and smoke with fists and sandaled feet protruding to portray violent tumult, superimposed with large animated “QA’BLOOEY!” “QA’BOOM!” “SHISH KABOB!” “SHISHLIK!” “FALAFEL!” Smoke clears to reveal Achmed, Farouk and Ali all blackened, with chirping birds circling their heads. Enter IDF soldier)
Schlomo: Excuse me, I’m looking for a partner for peace? Partner for peace is which way, please?
Posted by crittenden on 2006 10 04 at 11:53 AM • permalinkNo, there were no threats. Only prophecies.
Posted by The_Real_JeffS on 2006 10 04 at 05:29 PM • permalinkMan, those Mossad guys are really slick, aren’t they? And has anyone checked out Caterpiller’s alibi? Don’t forget to look for tell tale rust stains on the stiff.
Posted by Steve Skubinna on 2006 10 04 at 07:33 PM • permalinkIf you kill a fellow Muslim, do you only get 36 virgins?
Posted by richard mcenroe on 2006 10 04 at 08:06 PM • permalink14. Yes, but the upside is you don’t have to “shave your junk”!
Posted by Vanguard of the Commentariat on 2006 10 04 at 09:14 PM • permalinkPlease do not explain that last remark, VOTC
Posted by crittenden on 2006 10 04 at 10:51 PM • permalinkPaco makes a very astute point. Getting shotduring prayers is in all likelihood an ass shot. Not a dignified way to line up for virgins, clutching one’s ass, when all the other martyrs are holding their heads like basketballs, nobly charred.
Posted by crittenden on 2006 10 04 at 10:59 PM • permalinkCrittenden, don’t you just wish you could somehow get the gem at #7 worked into a Globe column?
A keeper. Cut, pasted, dried.
Posted by MentalFloss on 2006 10 05 at 04:14 AM • permalinkThank you, Floss, but thus far the Globe has refused my one condition of employment, that op-ed columnist James Carroll and Editor Marty Baron be required to wear burkahs to maintain the dignity of the workplace. So, they do their thing on Morrissey Boulevard, and I do mine at 1 Wingo Way.
Posted by crittenden on 2006 10 05 at 09:36 AM • permalink
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