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RELIGION VS. VICTORIA’S SECRET

NYC activist Bill Talen exposes the shocking link between Victoria’s Secret catalogues and global warming:

Vicki’s dirty little Secret is that it clear-cuts boreal forests for its one-million-a-day-catalogs.

You mean they use trees to make that paper document? Whoever would have guessed. Bill—aka Reverend Billy—seems a little obsessed by the popular lingerie manufacturer:

His latest preaching against Victoria’s Secret’s catalogues if of dire importance, he says, because it’s a matter of life and death for the planet.

Talen has teamed with the group ForestEthics, which is leading the campaign against a half-dozen of the country’s largest catalogue producers and which has highlighted Victoria’s Secret, in particular, because its catalogue is so iconic and identified with the brand.

Talen saw Al Gore’s new film, “An Inconvenient Truth,” and was deeply affected. Global-warming prophet Gore has further fueled Talen’s environmental fervor.

He’s particularly excited over the plight of bears:

“The North Pole is becoming soupy,” Talen said. “Polar bears are drowning — they can’t find ice to stand on. It’s an emergency and we seem unable to say it’s an emergency. It’s like a horror movie. There just isn’t anyone standing up against this except Al Gore.”

He won’t be standing once we take away all his ice. At least Bill and Al don’t have to deal with hurricanes this year. In other environmental news, we’re running out of oil:

D.H. Killeffer had a dire warning for gasoline-greedy Americans. The chemical engineer had crunched the numbers—he compared the country’s production of crude oil with its thirst for gasoline. “Estimates based on the most complete data now available place the end of our gasoline supply between ten and twenty years, with the odds in favor of ten rather than twenty,” Killeffer, secretary of the New York division of the American Chemical Society, wrote in the New York Times.

The year was 1925.

Posted by Tim B. on 08/21/2006 at 11:04 AM
  1. Talen saw Al Gore’s new film, “An Inconvenient Truth,” and was deeply affected. Possibly the movie served as some sort of epileptic trigger.

    Well, it will be a shame if this fellow succeeds. As someone who has long enjoyed the Victoria’s Secret catalogue - for the articles, of course - I will hate to see it go.

    Posted by paco on 2006 08 21 at 11:18 AM • permalink

  2. Maybe if Al Gore wore a g-string…

    Posted by Dan Lewis on 2006 08 21 at 11:23 AM • permalink

  3. His latest preaching against Victoria’s Secret’s catalogues if of dire importance, he says, because it’s a matter of life and death for the planet.

    Read: It’s the only way I’ll conquer my obsessive jacking problem.

    Posted by eraserhead on 2006 08 21 at 11:28 AM • permalink

  4. Love the Khillifer quote.

    You know, we might even run out of oil - sometime in the future. Goodness, we have previously run out of horses.

    We will run out of energy, though.

    Posted by Wimpy Canadian on 2006 08 21 at 11:41 AM • permalink

  5. I pick up my neighbors mail for her while she’s out of town and VS does send a catalog of pantily clad supermodels almost every day. Bastards.

    Posted by paulris on 2006 08 21 at 11:45 AM • permalink

  6. Nothing wrong with looking for alternative energy sources.  But the idea that Peak Oil is upon us is about as absurd now as it was back in 1925.  The Saudis aren’t even bothering to look for more oil.  A snippet from The Economist, August 10, 2006:

    Saudi Aramco’s proved reserves alone could keep the world supplied for several decades. But it is only exploiting ten of its 80 or so fields, so will be able to pump at the present rate for about 70 years even if it never discovers another drop of oil. In fact, Aramco and other NOCs are likely to find plenty more if they look, since their territory has not been very thoroughly explored. Only 2,000 wildcat wells have ever been dug in the countries around the Gulf, according to Leonardo Maugeri, an Italian oilman, compared with more than 1m wells in the United States.

    Posted by dkidd on 2006 08 21 at 11:51 AM • permalink

  7. The Slug interviewed Gore and did the “inconvenient” thing on Hateline..

    Posted by crash on 2006 08 21 at 12:08 PM • permalink

  8. The Feminist author Susan Faludi, in her book Backlash: The Undeclared War Against American Women, saw the Vast Rightwing Conspiracy behind Victoria’s Secret, too.

    By marketing inexpensive frilly feminine underwear to Middle American housewives, the theory goes, The Man was keeping women from being elected President or something…

    Lefty Progressives: Why Do They Hate Push Up Bras?

    Posted by JDB on 2006 08 21 at 12:14 PM • permalink

  9. 1925?

    I question the timing!!

    Posted by Bill Spencer on 2006 08 21 at 12:22 PM • permalink

  10. “The North Pole is becoming soupy”.We’re going to have to increase crouton production….

    Posted by Daniel San on 2006 08 21 at 12:34 PM • permalink

  11. The North Pole is becoming soupy

    Hmmm, wonder what kind of soup? North Arctic Bear Chowder? Or is it really more of a bisque?
      I’m getting hungry

    Posted by Shaky Barnes on 2006 08 21 at 12:36 PM • permalink

  12. Hmmm, wonder what kind of soup? North Arctic Bear Chowder? Or is it really more of a bisque?

    Rather like a chilled vichysoisse, I’d imagine.

    Posted by Rob Crawford on 2006 08 21 at 12:39 PM • permalink

  13. 12 Rather like a chilled vichysoisse, I’d imagine.

    What? Chilled vichyssoise? I always take mine heated. Oh, hold on a sec, looks like Michael Lonie calling. Hey, Mike. Huh? It’s SUPPOSED to be cold?  Are you sure? Geez, how am I going to get out of this without looking like a total bumpkin? Hmmm. Yeah, that ought to work. Thanks, Mike!

    Oh, did you say “vichyssoise”? My mistake. I thought you said SpaghettiO’s.

    Posted by paco on 2006 08 21 at 12:48 PM • permalink

  14. Who could forget the Club of Rome, which, in (I think) 1970 boldly predicted we’d be out of oil by 1990?

    Posted by James Waterton on 2006 08 21 at 12:48 PM • permalink

  15. LOL Paco!

    Posted by James Waterton on 2006 08 21 at 12:52 PM • permalink

  16. #14 James Waterton, Your memory is incredible. You’re absolutely correct. I interviewed Forrester in 1970 (Professor at M.I.T. who was chief supporter of the Club of Rome stance) who spouted the same BS (Ed: not Bachelor of Science) with the same lack of evidence.Forrester was not a scientist, but an engineer, so lack of evidence behind a theory didn’t bother him much. (He did devise the first internet, however.)

    Posted by stats on 2006 08 21 at 01:26 PM • permalink

  17. I’ve been searching the web for information about these damn drowning polar bears. It seems that back in 2004 a government expedition spotted 4 dead bears in the water and assumed that they had drowned.
    That’s it. None before and none since (please enlighten me if i am mistaken)

    So boo-hoo for the four bears. Maybe they were just stupid bears and this is just natural selection. Maybe they should win a Darwin award. But unless they’re drowning in vast numbers and clogging up our water intake pipes, I say to hell with them.

    Posted by Merlin on 2006 08 21 at 01:40 PM • permalink

  18. Extra! Extra! Village Voice Blog Picks Up The Fight!

    Last I check, the Voice is published on paper. Substandard paper, but still paper.

    Posted by Bruce Rheinstein on 2006 08 21 at 01:54 PM • permalink

  19. Tell it, Reverend Billy! 

    Of course all this concern for dying boreals and soupy bears is moot as of tomorrow, which is scheduled to be Iran’s Resounding Slap and Devastating Fist Blow.

    (Anybody else wonder why Ahmamidgetnutjob has been quiet about that since the UK bomb plot went bust?)

    Posted by RebeccaH on 2006 08 21 at 02:46 PM • permalink

  20. I thought that up till now Victoria’s Secret got a Get Out Of Jail Free Card because the worms unionized and fair trade, while the lingerie herds were free range and free of steroids.

    Posted by Pat Patterson on 2006 08 21 at 02:53 PM • permalink

  21. Crikey, don’t show Reverend Billy the Sears catalogue. VS does send out a lot of catalogues, though. And although many of them come with the warning “This could be your LAST catalogue”, it’s nearly impossible to get off their mailing list.

    Posted by Kyda Sylvester on 2006 08 21 at 03:02 PM • permalink

  22. It’s not just the paper used to print the catalog but the large amount of tissue paper that is used up as well.

    The only environmentally responsible thing Victoria Secret can do for the environment is to send the girls house to house to display their wares.

    Posted by rjschwarz on 2006 08 21 at 03:26 PM • permalink

  23. ...it’s nearly impossible to get off their mailing list.

    Why would I want to get off it, Kyda?  ;-P

    Posted by The_Real_JeffS on 2006 08 21 at 03:37 PM • permalink

  24. Talen has teamed with the group ForestEthics, which is leading the campaign against a half-dozen of the country’s largest catalogue producers and which has highlighted Victoria’s Secret, in particular, because its catalogue is so iconic and identified with the brand.

    What are the odds that this group is secretly engaging in some guerilla marketing for Victoria’s Secret? I mean, just a small change and ForestEthics becomes ForEsthetics.

    (Yes, I know the word is more commonly spelled with “ae”, but please indulge me.)

    Posted by PW on 2006 08 21 at 03:42 PM • permalink

  25. #6

    But the idea that Peak Oil is upon us is about as absurd now as it was back in 1925.

    Not half as absurd as the first recorded prediction that oil was running out: 1854 (IIRC), 5 years before the world’s first oil well was sunk! I’ll look for the link when I’ve got more time…

    Posted by AlburyShifton on 2006 08 21 at 04:01 PM • permalink

  26. What are the odds that this group is secretly engaging in some guerilla marketing for Victoria’s Secret? I mean, just a small change and ForestEthics becomes ForEsthetics.

    Oh, pretty good, I would say, PW.  There’s nothing a little sabotage to spice up lingerie!!!!

    Posted by The_Real_JeffS on 2006 08 21 at 04:55 PM • permalink

  27. Look for the Victoria’s Secret polar bear swimsuit issue.

    With more trees, bear floatation rafts could be built for North Pole deployment.

    Posted by rhhardin on 2006 08 21 at 05:49 PM • permalink

  28. Ursus maritimus people, that is the biological name of the polar bear; it means they can swim! For very long distances in fact. So watch out Quebec!

    Posted by Wolfbane on 2006 08 21 at 05:59 PM • permalink

  29. Last I check, the Voice is published on paper. Substandard paper, but still paper.

    I seem to recall being pleasantly surprised to discover that it is surprisingly absorbent.

    Posted by R C Dean on 2006 08 21 at 06:17 PM • permalink

  30. Well Hubbert was correct, the US lower 48 peaked in oil production as he predicted in 1971.  He also suggested that world oil supply would peak in the 1990’s, which it didn’t, most likely because of the demand destruction caused by the oil shocks, it probably put his prediction out by 15 or so years. 

    Peak oil production is not the same as running out, it just means it becomes more difficult and expensive to extract at the same rate.  Peak oil really means the end of cheap oil. 

    [url=http://www.peakoil.com]http://www.peakoil.com[/url]
    [url=http://www.lifeaftertheoilcrash.net/]http://www.lifeaftertheoilcrash.net/[/url]

    Posted by daza on 2006 08 21 at 06:24 PM • permalink

  31. #6, Gharwar is SA’s largests and oldest field now has a watercut of approx 30%~55%, the field that BP partially shutdown in Alaska, because of corrision in the infrastructure, has a watercut of 70%. Watercut is the result of pumping water into wells to keep the pressure up at the production heads, as the oil depletes, the amount of water at the production well increases, So BP were getting 3 barrels of water for every barrel of oil produced.


    or there abouts.

    Posted by daza on 2006 08 21 at 06:32 PM • permalink

  32. #16 stats on Forrester (He did devise the first internet, however.)

    Darnit.
    But will the future reveal that it was Al Gore who invented New Ice?

    Posted by Barrie on 2006 08 21 at 06:34 PM • permalink

  33. I pick up my neighbors mail for her while she’s out of town and VS does send a catalog of pantily clad supermodels almost every day.

    Please tell me she’s hot.

    Posted by Dave S. on 2006 08 21 at 06:35 PM • permalink

  34. I’m thinking Webdiary has role to play here.

    Remember this?

    If Margo and the “Management Team” where to approve of the Victoria Secret catalogue appearing on the Treesaver 2055 not another tree would have to be cut down again, ever!

    Posted by Hank Reardon on 2006 08 21 at 06:38 PM • permalink

  35. Scoff all you like people, but Mr Talen is onto something here.

    I was down at my newsagent investigating this phenomena, starting by taking off the plastic coverings on some magazines. I want to know exactly what it is they don’t want me to see. Next thing I know the “newsagent” (aka timber/plastic/oil industry operative) is throwing me out of the shop and calling me a “pervert”.

    Posted by Margos Maid on 2006 08 21 at 06:43 PM • permalink

  36. All these eco-wankers seem to be ignorant of the fact that all those catalogues (and magazines and newspapers) are printed on paper made from a pulpwood crop.  Millions of acres of trees grown just to be cut down and made into paper….with new trees planted to take their place.  Just like a corn field, only slower growing.  What a bunch of maroons.

    Posted by bill schumm on 2006 08 21 at 06:53 PM • permalink

  37. That was the first thing I thought when I read this fellow’s idiotic babblings about “boreal forests.” Does this idiot actually think valuable virgin forests are cut down for something as crass and common as paper? It took me three seconds on Google to find this simple article, obviously written for kids (and thus it may be somewhat over the average envirotard’s heads) which explains all about how various types of paper is made, and where the wood comes from: either tree farms where they are grown for that purpose, or from leftover lumber scraps.

    Posted by Andrea Harris, Administrator on 2006 08 21 at 07:05 PM • permalink

  38. 35

    Next thing I know the “newsagent” (aka timber/plastic/oil industry operative) is throwing me out of the shop and calling me a “pervert”.

    My good acquaintance Margos Maid. It was probably because the plastic was clear and you were drooling on the magazines.

    I must admit, from what you say, it does sound as though it was a bit harsh and done in poor manner.

    Posted by El Cid on 2006 08 21 at 07:16 PM • permalink

  39. #30, uh no, Peak Oil means a bunch of fucknut loons babbling on about the total collapse of society and civilization in a sudden cataclysmic Apocalypse. Or have you never read anything at the two websites for raving imbeciles to which you linked?

    Posted by Crispytoast on 2006 08 21 at 07:26 PM • permalink

  40. #17

    Four dead bears. Maybe they died from heart attacks caused by all the blubber they eat from seals.

    When are the nannies going to insist that we feed the bears salad, chicken and low-cholesterol dressings?

    Posted by kae on 2006 08 21 at 07:33 PM • permalink

  41. #39, i dont think there will be ‘a sudden cataclysmic Apocalypse’ at all, I’m sure we’ll be able to keep consuming resourses endlessly.

    In other news, today is the 22nd of August, which is supposedly when Ineedastraightjacket’s 12th man is supposed to fly out of the sky in his holy wicket or something.

    Posted by daza on 2006 08 21 at 07:48 PM • permalink

  42. #38

    Thankyou for your understanding El Cid.

    I am also considering taking a stance against environmental outrages in Porky’s Video Store and Adult Emporium if I can get them to let me in again.

    Posted by Margos Maid on 2006 08 21 at 07:50 PM • permalink

  43. The year was 1925.

    And we DID!  Most people don’t know this, but all those oil rigs and refineries you see?  A front, a cynical front.

    Actually, we’ve been running our society on the rendered fat of innocent Muslims imported from Israel…

    Posted by richard mcenroe on 2006 08 21 at 07:59 PM • permalink

  44. Margos Maid

    I am also considering taking a stance against environmental outrages in Porky’s Video Store and Adult Emporium if I can get them to let me in again.

    A truly noble cause. One can always break in if need be. I’m sure this whole Blog of Tim’s is behind you.

    If by chance things go sour, I, out of my own pocket, am making FREE MARGOS protest signs.

    May the police force be with you.

    Posted by El Cid on 2006 08 21 at 08:09 PM • permalink

  45. #43, ah, finally, a use for Islam - biofuel production.

    Posted by daza on 2006 08 21 at 08:16 PM • permalink

  46. Wildly OT - but Ian Chappell is currently chatting to John Laws about the Pakis forfieting their match against the Poms.

    He wants umpires to have sensitivity training and cultural lessons before they umpire different nationalities.

    I suppose Dean Jones should sign up for some lessons too.

    Posted by The Prez on 2006 08 21 at 08:34 PM • permalink

  47. Daza—Makes for a very efficient biodiesel, but your engine tends to whine…

    Posted by richard mcenroe on 2006 08 21 at 09:36 PM • permalink

  48. Actually, we’ve been running our society on the rendered fat of innocent Muslims imported from Israel…

    Yes but the frightening thing is that we’ve already past Peak Muslim-Fat production. The world will be depleted of the most productive lard-ass Muslims by 2025. What will we do then?

    Posted by Shaky Barnes on 2006 08 21 at 09:42 PM • permalink

  49. Shaky Barnes—We still have the Saudi Deposits…

    Posted by richard mcenroe on 2006 08 21 at 09:44 PM • permalink

  50. #17 I wonder if they were really dead? mighta just been playing possum. they do that you know - 3 or 4 of them float around in the fjords all dead like until some scientist, or winemaker, happens along to save them and SNAPEROO. Lunch.

    Posted by larrikin on 2006 08 21 at 09:50 PM • permalink

  51. Also wildly O/T, but in response tp The Prez (#46), just confirms my opinion that Ian Chappell is a total idiot.

    Somebody should explain to the Pakisatani cricket team that the game has rules (called “The Laws of Cricket”) and that umpires are paid to enforce the rules. They should read Law 21-3 (a) about what happens when you refuse to play when directed.

    Posted by Pedro the Ignorant on 2006 08 21 at 09:56 PM • permalink

  52. $43- National Lampoon had an item during the oil spike in the ‘80s (Carter era, Iranians acting like assholes as usual) on the viability of oil extraction from Arabs and Persians, and they reckoned you could get about 2+3/4 barrels of (very) crude from each one of the dirty buggers; they even had a press devised to carry out the degreasing.

    Posted by Habib on 2006 08 21 at 10:03 PM • permalink

  53. Habib, your’ve hit on a nice marketing niche - ‘cold pressed crude’ - the environazis will love it.

    Posted by daza on 2006 08 21 at 10:22 PM • permalink

  54. #51 Just a broader reflection of muslim nation’s refusing to play by any rules except their own. Now the defenders come out and say “racism” or “cultural misunderatnding”. It’s not bloody cricket.

    Posted by Infidel Tiger on 2006 08 21 at 10:24 PM • permalink

  55. 47 Daza—Makes for a very efficient biodiesel, but your engine tends to whine…

    Richard, don’t a small minority blow up the engine instead of just whining?

    Posted by The Prez on 2006 08 21 at 10:25 PM • permalink

  56. Speaking of tension between religion and scantily clad women, check out the pictures of Kate Moss outside a New York Mosque on this thread.

    Posted by 68W40 on 2006 08 21 at 10:34 PM • permalink

  57. I’m sure most of you have seen this before, but this Time Magazine article from 1974 on ‘global climatic upheaval’ (which is much less catchy than ‘climate change’) is a cracker.

    Another Ice Age?
    As they review the bizarre and unpredictable weather pattern of the past several years, a growing number of scientists are beginning to suspect that many seemingly contradictory meteorological fluctuations are actually part of a global climatic upheaval. However widely the weather varies from place to place and time to time, when meteorologists take an average of temperatures around the globe they find that the atmosphere has been growing gradually cooler for the past three decades. The trend shows no indication of reversing. Climatological Cassandras are becoming increasingly apprehensive, for the weather aberrations they are studying may be the harbinger of another ice age.

    It’s got all the usual ‘telltale signs’ of impending doom:

    from the unexpected persistence and thickness of pack ice in the waters around Iceland to the southward migration of a warmth-loving creature like the armadillo from the Midwest.
    ...
    —the Midwest’s recent rash of disastrous tornadoes, for example.

    As well as the real culprits:

    Man, too, may be somewhat responsible for the cooling trend.

    And apocalyptic predictions:

    its effects could be extremely serious, if not catastrophic. Scientists figure that only a 1% decrease in the amount of sunlight hitting the earth’s surface could tip the climatic balance, and cool the planet enough to send it sliding down the road to another ice age within only a few hundred years.

    ...global food stores would be sharply reduced. University of Toronto Climatologist ... Hare: “I don’t believe that the world’s present population is sustainable if there are more than three years like 1972 in a row.”

    [Apologies for the long post]

    Posted by Art Vandelay on 2006 08 21 at 11:30 PM • permalink

  58. Makes for a very efficient biodiesel, but your engine tends to whine…

    Detonation is a problem, too…

    Posted by Dave S. on 2006 08 22 at 12:04 AM • permalink

  59. Re #56, LOL, 91B30!  Mayhaps someone should send that mosque a subscription for the Victoria’s Secrets catalog…...

    Posted by The_Real_JeffS on 2006 08 22 at 12:14 AM • permalink

  60. Quote of the Week on Petrol:

    Sky TV Interviewer (to Kevin Rudd): So what you’re saying is that it would have been better to keep Saddam Hussein in power and saved a few cents per litre on petrol?

    Posted by Apparatchik on 2006 08 22 at 12:18 AM • permalink

  61. First it was global freezing. The econazis forced all sorts of changes and now it’s global warming and the econazis want to force all sorts of changes.

    Anyone else feel a chill coming on?

    Posted by Grimmy on 2006 08 22 at 01:13 AM • permalink

  62. Oh, wrong thread I think for #61, sorry. :/

    Victoria’s Secrets serves a very important social service with that catalog thing.

    If I had a wife, I’d need that catalog to know what to get for her to help her feel pretty.

    Since I don’t have a wife I appreciate the catalog as a study aid to keep abreast of the issue, just in case the wife situation changes some day.

    There is that whole “use it or loose it” thing, ya know?

    Posted by Grimmy on 2006 08 22 at 01:18 AM • permalink

  63. 1) My high school “science” teacher stated in ‘71 that he would never have children because he believed he would “live to see them starve to death” in the upcoming ice age, starting around ‘84.

    2)I was an undergrad in ‘73 when one of my “science” professors stated, unequivocally, that oil reserves would be gone by ‘80.

    I think it’s time to take them seriously.

    Posted by Hucklebuck on 2006 08 22 at 11:57 AM • permalink

  64. #63 Hucklebuck:

    My high school “science” teacher stated in ‘71 that he would never have children

    Put into context by the rest of your post, I’d call that a win.

    Posted by Grimmy on 2006 08 22 at 03:26 PM • permalink

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