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RANGOON HAS A LEADING FRENCH CHEF?

Via Radar, quirky facts about crazy dictators:

1. COL. MUAMMAR ABU MINYAR AL-QUADDAFI. “An avid soccer fan, he purchased a 7.5 percent share of the Italian soccer club Juventus in 2002.”

2. SR. GEN. THAN SHWE. “Recently revealed that he had been taking cooking classes with a leading French chef in Rangoon.”

3. KIM JONG IL. “Hobbies include watching NBA basketball.”

4. PRESIDENT KIRSAN ILYUMZHINOV. “Claims that his achievements in politics and chess were predicted by a Bulgarian astrologer named Vanga.”

5. SULTAN HAJI HASSANAL BOLKIAH MU’IZZADDIN WADDAULAH. “Fond of buying Ferraris and Bentleys and having them converted into station wagons.”

Click for more.

Posted by Tim B. on 12/13/2006 at 03:15 AM
  1. I hear Quiggin is a University dictator.  What quirky facts do you have about him?

    Posted by mr creosote on 2006 12 13 at 03:52 AM • permalink

  2. I have it on good authority that Saddam used to have the panels of the entry chute to his human shredding machines lined with gold.

    Also, troublemakers (such as fools who fancied democracy) were only ever executed using pearl handled pistols and hollow point rounds, hand carved by only the finest swiss craftsmen.

    I cannot for the life of me understand why such a bon vivant was cruelly and unlawfully removed from power, but I hope that Miranda Divide can set me straight.

    Posted by Penguin on 2006 12 13 at 04:53 AM • permalink

  3. Those Kwazy Kwirky Killer Kolonels! Ya can’t blame the Left for loving them, now, can you??

    Posted by AlburyShifton on 2006 12 13 at 04:58 AM • permalink

  4. Thankfully, this tread appears to be condescension-free, at least for the moment, and is already brimming with the sarcasm we all know and love.

    Posted by Spiny Norman on 2006 12 13 at 04:59 AM • permalink

  5. Poor Kim, why must he always be so ronery?

    Posted by bondo on 2006 12 13 at 05:15 AM • permalink

  6. 4#Spiny

    Con D. Scension here. Brother of Con D. Fruiterer. Sister of Con D. Rice

    your wish is my command….

    Posted by JonathanH on 2006 12 13 at 05:44 AM • permalink

  7. #1:

    1. Despite receiving over a million doubloons from the good old ATP (Aussie Tax Payer), he wears the same pair of underpants for over a month.

    2. He has a penchant for wearing socks and sandals.

    3. His beard hides numerous refugees from the HoWARd dictatorship.

    4. He has a rare collection of the phyla ‘Ficus Pandorata’ in his back yard.

    Posted by Nic on 2006 12 13 at 05:46 AM • permalink

  8. Rangoon has a leading French Chef?
    Strange tales and true from the legendary past. North Vietnamese leader Ho Chi Minh had many names during his life. At one stage he was an assistant chef, and travelled to Paris. His name was Thanh at that time:

    Thanh had the desire to see the world, and especially France. He wanted to know who these people were and how they could rule Vietnam after coming from thousands of miles away. He took a job on a ship docked in the Saigon harbour. He had to work as an assistant to a cook from very early in the morning till dark. He had a smattering of French. Thanh stayed in Paris for some time.
    link

    Posted by blogstrop on 2006 12 13 at 06:28 AM • permalink

  9. The inevitable comment left after the article: “This story forgot to include George Bush. If you want a rich fascist, we need look no further than the man-child living in the White House.”

    The guy who wrote that was subsequently arrested and conveyed to Guantanamo Bay for torture.  Watch what you say, America.

    Posted by Damian P. on 2006 12 13 at 06:40 AM • permalink

  10. Well, Dubya enjoys watching Major League Baseball games, that obviously makes him morally equivalent to Kim Jong Il.

    Posted by PW on 2006 12 13 at 07:37 AM • permalink

  11. Did Nancy and Ronald Reagan really consult an astrologer or was that just an urban myth?
    yours urbanely,
    ThePirateKing

    Posted by ThePirateKing on 2006 12 13 at 07:37 AM • permalink

  12. Oooh, PK has uncovered our Kryptonite! Phasers on kill!

    Posted by Andrea Harris, Administrator on 2006 12 13 at 08:06 AM • permalink

  13. Nancy did. And your point?

    Oh wait, AmeriKKKa and Ronald RAYGUN, fascist dictator.

    Yawn.

    Posted by Mr. Bingley on 2006 12 13 at 08:08 AM • permalink

  14. I don’t recall the Reagans relocating our capitol on the basis of anything an astrologer had to say…

    Posted by Cybrludite on 2006 12 13 at 08:16 AM • permalink

  15. I believe Sultan Haji is thereby guilty of crimes against humanity.

    Posted by Latino on 2006 12 13 at 08:17 AM • permalink

  16. That Mswati III dude is crazy like a fox.

    Posted by slammer on 2006 12 13 at 08:19 AM • permalink

  17. SULTAN HAJI HASSANAL BOLKIAH MU’IZZADDIN WADDAULAH. “Fond of buying Ferraris and Bentleys and having them converted into station wagons.”

    That’s just wrong.

    Posted by Baby M on 2006 12 13 at 08:34 AM • permalink

  18. Tim, for a car lover like you item 5 on the list must have been painful to see.

    Posted by Retread on 2006 12 13 at 08:35 AM • permalink

  19. Baby M,
      are you kidding? A Ferrari Daytona Estate…

    Posted by lotocoti on 2006 12 13 at 08:40 AM • permalink

  20. Well, I recall seeing an Aston Martin DB5 Shooting Brake in an old issue of Road and Track…

    Posted by triticale on 2006 12 13 at 09:00 AM • permalink

  21. Did Nancy and Ronald Reagan really consult an astrologer or was that just an urban myth?

    Apparently Nancy did. And Hillary Clinton held seances to contact Eleanor Roosevelt.

    Hmmm… once more, the moron’s response to ANY criticism of ANYONE is to try to slam the US. I think we have a bigot, folks.

    Posted by Rob Crawford on 2006 12 13 at 09:03 AM • permalink

  22. Did Nancy and Ronald Reagan really consult an astrologer or was that just an urban myth?

    Well for once, Mr./Ms./or It, I believe is on something on TO something Ronald W. Reagan took to astrology, like a duck to water.

    In fact so much so, that after “Ronnie” (he told me to call him by that name) was elected Governor of California in 1966, the Governorship became so, so…well, bored, in dealing with people of BORING urbanities, that between 1968 and 1969, Ronnie just for the thrill of it, became the famed Zodiac.

    A person with your urbanity should have easily spotted the intentionally cryptic, child like drawings and letters of his crazed serial killer persona, (I mean after all, would the Governor of the Great State of California craft drawings, letters and sign such… with ‘Yours Respectfully, Ronald W. Reagan Governor State of California, come on…geez?) in this, this and this.

    Since you didn’t do so, one is to assume that your “yours urbanely”, is nothing but a myth.

    Yours Respectfully

    Posted by El Cid on 2006 12 13 at 09:41 AM • permalink

  23. Sorry about the long quote from the above link as the comments here are usually short, sharp and witty

    However this amazes me about the bloke dictaing to the masses in Turkmanistan

    One thing that’s always in vogue in Turkmenistan is Ruhnama, a spiritual book written by none other than the dictator himself. It’s required in school, a prerequisite for passing the drivers’ license exam, and mandatory reading for adults on Saturdays. Once citizens have noted the latter day in the calendars they might want to continue their probe. Niyazov has apparently renamed the months on the official calendar, and in a telling example has named January after himself. But don’t accuse him of being a total bad guy; he did rename April after his beloved mother.

    The whole country and it’s people are his playthings

    The only thing I can do is dictate to is my partner and my cats - my kids who have left home can ignore me

    This bloke can direct millions of people to do whatever he wishes

    Posted by aussiemagpie on 2006 12 13 at 09:59 AM • permalink

  24. Even as a child, I was never a fan of Disney cartoons but I’ve read Stalin enjoyed them at private screenings while denying them to the Glorious Soviet Workers. I also read that Leonid Breshnev quite fancied a Micky Mouse watch.

    Posted by JDB on 2006 12 13 at 10:04 AM • permalink

  25. O/T, but Iowahawk has an exclusive on Kofi Annan.

    Posted by paco on 2006 12 13 at 10:54 AM • permalink

  26. “SULTAN HAJI HASSANAL BOLKIAH MU’IZZADDIN WADDAULAH. “Fond of buying Ferraris and Bentleys and having them converted into station wagons.”

    How odd. When I become President For Life, I shall convert station wagons to Maseratis.

    Posted by Harry Bergeron on 2006 12 13 at 11:28 AM • permalink

  27. From the picture at the top of the story, I can’t tell whether Qaddafi is trying to look like Michael Jackson, or whether Jackson is trying to look like Qaddafi.  But if you see one of them surrounded by beautiful women, it’s Qaddafi.

    Posted by JDFlanagan on 2006 12 13 at 11:46 AM • permalink

  28. Love Qaddafi’s comic opera uniform. I wonder what all the medals are for? Expert taking of cover during the U.S. air atrike? Heroic Murder of Airline Passengers? Best Dictator Hair?

    BTW, O/T, but if you’re like Sylvestre Reyes, Nancy Pelosi’s choice to run the House Intelligence Committee, and don’t know that Shiites come from where the Sunnis don’t shine, here’s a useful primer.

    Posted by paco on 2006 12 13 at 12:52 PM • permalink

  29. SULTAN HAJI HASSANAL BOLKIAH MU’IZZADDIN WADDAULAH. “Fond of buying Ferraris…and having them converted into station wagons.”

    This is the evillest dictator who has ever lived.

    Posted by Dave S. on 2006 12 13 at 02:24 PM • permalink

  30. I love folks like PirateKing who are so obsessed with America that any commentary on any subject will lead to an anti-American sneer. Reminds me of a high-school loser who constantly snarks about the cheerleaders while fantasizing about them every night in a bitter pool of tears and semen.

    Posted by Dave S. on 2006 12 13 at 02:30 PM • permalink

  31. I guess it’s about time Miranda linked us to Baghdad again.

    Posted by Dminor on 2006 12 13 at 02:38 PM • permalink

  32. #29: I agree. This moves the whole Pinochet thing to the back burner.

    Posted by paco on 2006 12 13 at 03:02 PM • permalink

  33. Did Nancy and Ronald Reagan really consult an astrologer or was that just an urban myth?

    For the life of me, I can’t figure out what this has to do with a thread about dictators and their quirks.  Please explain.

    Posted by RebeccaH on 2006 12 13 at 03:15 PM • permalink

  34. ... so obsessed with America that any commentary on any subject will lead to an anti-American sneer.

    Story from a class just today (official statistics in economics, not that it makes any difference)...the professor is definitely no moonbat, and not even particularly leftish as far as I can tell, and he’s a guest lecturer who used to head up a fairly big department at the Berlin branch of the German national institute of statistics, so he’s not a “those who can’t do, teach” type. Nevertheless: In talking about a classification system for goods and businesses, he points out that the European (and German) classification is based on an international one that’s regularly being updated by a council in New York - where apparently you Yanks and the Canucks have considerable weight in the decision-making. What has always irked him, he says, is that these two countries’ bureaucrats were some of the worst offenders when it came to ignoring the international standards in their national classification setups even as they continued to throw their weight around in the council.

    Okay, fair point, I suppose…I’m not nearly as knowledgeable about the subject as he is, and my faith in American government drones isn’t exactly high, so it’s probably true. But then he goes on, and I mostly quote: “But of course, it’s nothing unusual if Americans don’t behave properly on the international scene - one just needs to remember how they withheld their Unicef dues for years due to political reasons”...and I’m sitting there thinking “what the fuck does that have to do with anything in this class?” It’s not the first time either, we’ve had a couple of sneering comments about Iraq in the past, as well. (And yes, he said “Unicef” for whatever reason, not “United Nations”, so he didn’t even get that part right.)

    I don’t think many Americans really understand the scope of the problem yet…casual anti-Americanism is at least as fashionable and accepted in Europe today as casual anti-Semitism was in the 19th century (i.e. the “everybody knows the Jews do such and such reprehensible things” kind, not the Hitlerian “let’s exterminate them all” kind.), and just like back then, I doubt it will forever remain at this level.

    Oh well, rant over.

    Posted by PW on 2006 12 13 at 04:19 PM • permalink

  35. These bloody dictators are all just, so unoriginal.
    “Fond of buying Ferraris and Bentleys and having them converted into station wagons.”

    What would be a much greater challenge would be to buy station wagons and turn them into Ferraris and Bentleys.

    Posted by Bonmot on 2006 12 13 at 04:26 PM • permalink

  36. L’il Kim likes NBA basketball? Now there’s a good example of envy.

    Also, if Qaddafi keeps wearing those starched white outfits, someone’s going to mistake him for a chef and complain about the dinner rolls.

    Posted by Merlin on 2006 12 13 at 04:43 PM • permalink

  37. Great name for a basketball team:
    Singapore Slingers.
    Nice looking site although a little slow to load.
    Link

    Posted by blogstrop on 2006 12 13 at 05:04 PM • permalink

  38. OT since Kim Jong Il is world’s most democratic leader, but it’s a good thing for Tiger Woods that Kim Jong Il is usually too busy to join the PGA tour.

    Posted by Margos Maid on 2006 12 13 at 05:17 PM • permalink

  39. World’s best blog says there is such a thing as good Jews.

    (BTW There is an obsession at this site about cats that I am yet to work out - except that imperialist Americans treat them badly)

    Posted by Margos Maid on 2006 12 13 at 07:10 PM • permalink

  40. That picture of Gaddafi Qaddafi Giraffee Al-Qaddafi really is Michael Jackson. Strangely, if you look at the 2nd photo, Billy Joel seems to be accompanying him.

    Posted by Infidel Tiger on 2006 12 13 at 08:18 PM • permalink

  41. The Sultan of Bruei’s brother Jefri is a classy guy too.

    His brother Prince Jefri, known as the Playboy Prince, used to ‘help’ him in choosing which and how many cars should they buy. Famous for his lavish lifestyle, besides his expensive and exotic cars, Jefri also has a 50 meter yacht called Tits which contained two lifeboats named Nipple 1 and Nipple 2

    Some of his cars.

    Posted by Infidel Tiger on 2006 12 13 at 08:28 PM • permalink

  42. Thank you for that information, MM. I was not aware that Dear Leader had such golfing skills as well as being the world’s greated film director.

    Posted by Henry boy on 2006 12 13 at 09:11 PM • permalink

  43. PW
    Canadian diplomats “throwing their weight around” at the UN???? Could you get some details? The last couple ambassadors we sent there were selected for their marshmellowness, soft and squishy.

    Cheers

    Posted by J.M. Heinrichs on 2006 12 13 at 09:32 PM • permalink

  44. Nah, not ambassadors…they were probably some nerdy accountant types with passive-aggressive issues. ;)

    Posted by PW on 2006 12 13 at 09:54 PM • permalink

  45. PW,
    A German chiding the USA for bad international behavior?  That’s just too rich.

    He might want to look at why we were withholding dues, namely to reform a corrupt agency so that it did what it was supposed to do.  The trouble with so many Euros is that they never consider substance, only form and the superficialities of a case.

    Posted by Michael Lonie on 2006 12 13 at 11:57 PM • permalink

  46. #39- that site’s parody right?
    it can’t be for real

    Posted by eeniemeenie on 2006 12 14 at 12:06 AM • permalink

  47. I was about to call BS on this but a quick google search revealed a ferrari station wagon

    I’m at a loss.

    Posted by Col. Milquetoast on 2006 12 14 at 01:39 AM • permalink

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