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PUTTING MO INTO MOTOR SPORT

NBC’s crazy Muslims-amongst-the-NASCARites stunt could soon be coming to a speedway near YOU:

“‘Dateline’ is looking into this story,” NBC said in a statement. “We were intrigued by the results of a recent Washington Post/ABC News poll and other articles regarding increasing anti-Muslim sentiments in the United States.

“It’s very early on in our newsgathering process, but be assured we will be visiting a number of locations across the country and are confident that our reporting team is pursuing this story in a fair manner,” it said.

If you encounter someone at a NASCAR event you suspect to be an NBC stunt Muslim—or any track-visiting Muslim, for that matter—ask them if restrictor plates are considered ha’ram. No sinister intent; I’d just like to know.

UPDATE. Mohammed Alo compares Islam and NASCAR. Surprising similarities emerge.

UPDATE II: “Come Mr. Taliban, come to Talladega …”

Posted by Tim B. on 04/06/2006 at 12:53 PM
  1. I have to wonder if their plans include sneaking cameras and/or mics into mosques to find out what’s being said by Muslims.

    I get the feeling they’re not. Not the story they want to cover, really.

    Posted by Rob Crawford on 2006 04 06 at 01:01 PM • permalink

  2. I have to wonder if their plans include sneaking cameras and/or mics into mosques to find out what’s being said by Muslims.

    Nah, why bother…our intellectual betters in the media just know that Muslims don’t really mean what they say in private, just like Osama doesn’t really mean what he says on those tapes of his.

    Posted by PW on 2006 04 06 at 01:08 PM • permalink

  3. Come Mr. Taliban, come to Talladega…

    Posted by chinesearithmetic on 2006 04 06 at 01:12 PM • permalink

  4. We were intrigued by the results of a recent Washington Post/ABC News poll and other articles regarding increasing anti-Muslim sentiments in the United States.

    Would someone please tell NBC, about Muslim terror activities against the “United States” here, in country and abroad.

    Posted by El Cid on 2006 04 06 at 01:17 PM • permalink

  5. A diesel racecar (like Audi’s) could totally burn bacon-fat, though.

    While that would be bad news for Jewish and Muslim spectators, man, think how good the track would smell.

    Posted by Sigivald on 2006 04 06 at 01:18 PM • permalink

  6. chinesearithmetic-careful, Harry Belafonte will be putting that lyric into the tune.

    Posted by 68W40 on 2006 04 06 at 01:39 PM • permalink

  7. Any other Yanks reminded of the old Saturday Night Live (late ‘70’s) skit called “Danger Probe” where they sent two 17th century Belgian fops (Michael Palin, Garrett Morris) into a redneck bar?

    Morris says, “I rouge my lips to kiss men!” and Dan Akroyd and cops burst in just as the rednecks are going to beat the fops to a pulp.

    What was comedy is now considered serious journalism. Unbelievable.

    Posted by JDB on 2006 04 06 at 04:27 PM • permalink

  8. 7. I forgot that one. After “Ned Garvin, Male Prostitute,” it was all a blur.

    Posted by chinesearithmetic on 2006 04 06 at 04:59 PM • permalink

  9. Brilliant Tim!  Here’s a T-shirt based on your neologism.

    T-shirt JPEG

    These should be standard wear at NASCAR events.

    Posted by Dave in Chicago on 2006 04 06 at 06:17 PM • permalink

  10. “Ned Garvin, Male Prostitute,”

    And of course, his “rather elaborate set of trusses”.

    Posted by Thomas on 2006 04 06 at 07:16 PM • permalink

  11. How about stunt Christian converts in a Muslim country?  Say Afghanistan, Iran, Pakistan, etc. 

    Or is that sending the wrong message?

    Posted by youngy on 2006 04 06 at 07:58 PM • permalink

  12. JDB—Actually the line was, “My lips are rouged to receive gentlemen’s kisses.”

    OK, worried I remember that.  But I remember Jane Curtin ripping her blouse open too, so I’m okay, right?

    Posted by richard mcenroe on 2006 04 06 at 08:37 PM • permalink

  13. My bet (i’m betting a lot today). They won’t get enough instances of obvious outright hostility to make it worthwhile television. So the show will interview the “stunt muslims” (great name) and much will be made of unfriendly glances and murmered comments. the stunt muslims will remark about how uncomfortable they felt regardless of whether anything was said to them or not.

    Posted by Francis H on 2006 04 06 at 10:37 PM • permalink

  14. Shoot, if I was at a NASCAR race and saw a ROPer wandering around….I’d stay the hell away from him, just in case he decided to explode!

    They do that, you know.

    Posted by rinardman on 2006 04 06 at 10:51 PM • permalink

  15. I have an idea: leave the Muslims alone, and beat the snot out of the television crew.

    Posted by Mitch on 2006 04 06 at 11:24 PM • permalink

  16. “’Dateline’ is looking into this story,” NBC said in a statement. “We were intrigued by the results of a recent Washington Post/ABC News poll and other articles regarding increasing anti-Muslim sentiments in the United States.

    But are we looking on the streets of New York City, or the campuses of Columbia and Duke? Nawwww…

    Posted by richard mcenroe on 2006 04 06 at 11:26 PM • permalink

  17. “How many Muslims are in the Red Cross?” Think about that one for a minute…

    Posted by OldeForce on 2006 04 07 at 01:13 AM • permalink

  18. Somewhere I recall reading that in any group, in any crowd, there is always a small sliver, maybe 2%, possibly less, that’s willing to do the most stupid vile thing possible.  That’s what Dateline is aiming for.  I’m sure they’ll find it.  Eventually.

    Posted by wronwright on 2006 04 07 at 01:31 AM • permalink

  19. I’m with Mitch (Nr.15). Get the 2% fired up to beat piss and pickhandles out of the TV crew… while offering the fake Muslim beer and a seat to enjoy watching the fun!

    That’d confuse the bastards.

    MarkL
    Canberra

    Posted by MarkL on 2006 04 07 at 05:25 AM • permalink

  20. If the restrictor plate question gets answered, ask them about the following engine and car parts such as:

    big ends, con rods, pist-ons, strokers, front ends, back ends, blowers, rings, body, bushings, head, pump and suspension ...

    If they can answer, they are a one helluva race car loving person.  They’ll also think you’re a sexual pervert.

    Posted by Stevo on 2006 04 07 at 05:34 AM • permalink

  21. Murray and I have come up with t-shirts for NASCAR fans. Buy one for your NASCAR loving mates. T-shirts are inspired by the this piece of idiocy as found by LGF.

    NB: Done in loving memory of my fave NASCAR fan Mommabear.

    Posted by Andrew Ian Dodge on 2006 04 07 at 05:49 AM • permalink

  22. I hope the good folks at Texas Motor Speedway publicize the hell out of the pending sting before and during the race.

    They should offer prizes for anyone who can identify a stunt Muslim or camera crew member.

    Posted by R C Dean on 2006 04 07 at 07:00 AM • permalink

  23. I must admit I almost admire them for the chutzpah in the formulation “‘Dateline’ is looking into this story”, given that even they must realize they’re essentially trying to fabricate “this story” out of whole cloth themselves.

    Or, if they don’t realize it, it’s more proof that TV journalists have collectively gone insane and ought to be booked for a lengthy stay in the house with the padded walls.

    Posted by PW on 2006 04 07 at 08:47 AM • permalink

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