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PRECIOUS RESOURCES TO BE DEVOURED
Environmentalists hate it when people make fun of their religion. Speaking of profound ecological issues, a bunch of us are planning a trip to Western Sydney International Dragway on December 26-7 to see that bitch goddess Nature take one between the eyes. Please email me if you’d like to come along; even if you have no interest in motorsport, it’s worth attending just for the delightful environmental activities. Listen carefully during a Top Fuel race and you can almost hear the planet screaming.
UPDATE. “Shame on you,” writes David Crawford. “Dragsters make Mother Gaia cry.” Yes. Yes, they do. And here’s why:
77: Gallons per minute the fuel system can pump at wide-open throttle. The engine will consume 22.75 gallons of fuel during warmup, burnout, staging, and the quarter-mile run.
28: Quarts of oil used during warm-up and quarter-mile run.
1082: Greenbacks you’ll need to buy a pair of new Goodyear R36x17.5 rear slicks. If you’re lucky, they’ll last you a bit over a mile.
165: Temperature in Fahrenheit of the 14-71-type supercharger after just 4.5 seconds of maximum boost.
Nice numbers. But we must always remember that the War on Nature won’t be won until the last rainforest is harvested, the last glacier melted, and the last panda eaten.
UPDATE II. Enviro-guy Brian S.: “One criticism I’ll make of parts of the environmental movement is showing insufficient desperation over global warming.” Maybe they don’t actually believe in it.
UPDATE III. AussieJim: “Actually, doesn’t Nitromethane burn pretty hot and clean? I think that Tim should stop all this political point scoring and start doing something to help the environment. He can start by converting his MX-5 to this promising alternative energy source.”
UPDATE IV. Environmentalista Stephen Gloor—who posts here as Ender—is gloomy. Or possibly gloormy.
UPDATE V. Lambert reader Scott Church: “Blair has a long history of making far stupider statements than these, and then trying to sue anyone who publicly attempts to correct him.” I think he’s getting me mixed up with someone else (Wayne Sanderson, possibly). Scott also comes up with this brilliant line: “If Blair is joking, he has a funny way of showing it.”
I was watching Discovery Times (a Discovery-run cable channel affiliated with the New York Times), and they were having a commercial about an upcoming special about how the Arctic ice cap is going to be “gone” by “the end of the century” and all the poor polar bears will have no where to sit, countries will start fighting over, um, the total lack of land at the North Pole, etc. All because of Global Warming, of course. Say, wasn’t the Medieval Warm period a time when growing seasons were longer up north, they grew grapes in England, etc. etc.? Oh never mind, all the ice will melt and every single continent will be inundated up to the mountain tops, it will be hell, Kevin Costner will make us drink our own urine, etc., etc.
Posted by Andrea Harris, Administrator on 2005 12 18 at 11:50 PM • permalinkthey grew grapes in England
They still do. Which brings us this interesting quotation:
Maybe it’s too soon to be sure that global warming is really turning Sussex into Champagne or Devon into Tuscany but three in a row might well make one begin to think that way - after all some English wines are already matching or beating the best in the world.
Save the British wine industry: Buy a Humvee.
Shame on you. Dragsters make Mother Gaia cry.
Posted by David Crawford on 2005 12 19 at 12:29 AM • permalinkFirst timers to a top fuel drag event are guaranteed to fall off their chair in shock when the cars launch. Take earplugs and earmuffs!
Posted by Lucky Nutsacks on 2005 12 19 at 12:37 AM • permalinkOr dragged behind a dragster…
Do any ironic, postmodern racers name their dragsters Priscilla?
Posted by richard mcenroe on 2005 12 19 at 12:37 AM • permalinkTim, haven’t you heard? The dragsters are running biodiesel this year. All you will smell is burning rubber and french fries.
Posted by Mystery Meat on 2005 12 19 at 12:49 AM • permalinkApparently Lambert is so sad that he can’t see the humour in anti-global warming protesters fighting off biting cold.
Why does the left suffer from such self-seriousness? Retarded comedy gland?
Posted by niobium2000 on 2005 12 19 at 01:00 AM • permalinkWhy does the left suffer from such self-seriousness? Retarded comedy gland?
I dunno, niobium2000. This characteristic is so common amongst lefties that I use it as a True Leftie Indicator™. It almost never fails.
Nice link, BTW! Maybe Lambert should read it with his irony meter engaged.
Posted by The_Real_JeffS on 2005 12 19 at 01:17 AM • permalinkAussieJim,
There’s always something to bitch about, if you look hard enough. Nitromethane burning hot enough will obviously produce nitrogen oxides that will acidify the rain. Plus it produces that awful CO2. Yucky stuff.It’s all a matter of creative thought.
Posted by Michael Lonie on 2005 12 19 at 01:22 AM • permalinkWhat strikes me as rather snortworthy is that global warm-onagers gobble up and regurgitate whatever liturgical swill their grant-eating high priests tell them to, yet those evil anti-consensus stormtroopers of Gaian death are skeptical enough to have figured out for themselves that progressive luddites limply swinging pig iron computer simulations under the pink banner of social justice are generally full of highly compressed methane.
I chuckle everytime I see these luvvies fervently peddling superduper sophisticated computer models which can’t seem to predict whether it’s to rain the day after tomorrow or the day after the day after tomorrow.
It’s the good ol’ 50% chance of doom forecast.
Come one come all! Step right up and watch the magical socialist koolaid cash machine chug on its bli$$ful reality-based way...Admission is only $2700.00 a year for American families. (75% discount for non-American western indutrialised families - 100% instant cash back rebate for everybody else. Restrictions don’t apply)
Not to worry sheeple, it’s all for our own collective good because - haven’t you noticed - environ-mentalists just love saving them there human populations.
Why does the left suffer from such self-seriousness? Retarded comedy gland?
Hey, if you’d watched everything you claimed to believe in NOT HAPPEN for the past 40+ years, you’d be grumpy, too…
Posted by richard mcenroe on 2005 12 19 at 02:20 AM • permalinkTim are you trying to stoke the fires under ender?
you should at least wait for Dave S, ender and Dave have a special bond.
http://timblair.net/ee/index.php/weblog/comments/snow_means_heat/#82509
#11 - “Actually, doesn’t Nitromethane burn pretty hot and clean?...”
Not if my visit to Calder Park drags is anything to go by. A visit to the pits soon had eyes and nose running and burning - spent nitro fumes are painful.
An amazing story of how a drag racing mother killed herself and her son:
Shelly Howard, who was 59 and lived in Tulsa, was testing her new A/Fuel dragster at Tulsa Raceway Park, a dragstrip not sanctioned by the National Hot Rod Association, when the car went airborne near the finish line and spun 180 degrees in midair.
When the dragster landed, it accelerated—reaching nearly 250 mph, police estimated—and headed back toward the starting line. The car collided with the team’s tow vehicle, a station wagon in which Brian Howard, 36, was riding. He died from his injuries late Saturday.
Posted by walterplinge on 2005 12 19 at 05:25 AM • permalinkBut we must always remember that the War on Nature won’t be won until the last rainforest is harvested, the last glacier melted, and the last panda eaten.
Oh, thank you Tim Blair. Karl read that and now has penciled in panda as another entree for the Christmas is Not a Fucking Secular Holiday Swampies! dinner at the Neocon Club. Now I have to fly to China.
I have no time for this. I haven’t even finished my secular holiday shopping.
Posted by wronwright on 2005 12 19 at 07:14 AM • permalinkJust read the comments at Lambert’s blog....nice ripost, ekw! As I noted there. Ender remains obstinate and ignorant, which is no doubt why he scurries to Tim Lambert, as they have so much in common.
Posted by The_Real_JeffS on 2005 12 19 at 10:44 AM • permalinkWould you say Sir Donald Bradman was the BIg Daddy Don Garlitz of cricket?
Posted by chinesearithmetic on 2005 12 19 at 12:42 PM • permalinkSpelling police update:
Would you say Sir donald Bradman was the Big Daddy Don Garlits of cricket?
Posted by chinesearithmetic on 2005 12 19 at 12:46 PM • permalinkUmm, thanks for the link, Tim. I do think nearly all enviros accept the well-established scientific consensus on global warming.
I do too, and I encourage you or anyone else who disagrees with me to bet me about it, here.
I posted this on an earlier thread and received some mockery (good-natured, I’m sure), but no actual interest in betting.
I’ll just repeat here that I’m not interested in arguing, just betting, and I’ll also concede in advance that everyone here can beat me in a battle of wits. I just want to bet. Anyone willing to put their money where their mouth is?
Posted by schmidtb98 on 2005 12 19 at 01:07 PM • permalinkSchmidt, if you’ve read any of Ender’s comments, you’d know why rationialists would be apprehensive of making bets with enviroreligionists. The “proof” of a win would consist of computer models, selective temperature recordings, scientific “consensus”, etc.
I clicked your link, and picked one of the bets at random to google. Here’s one of the results.
Now, since Ender was such a chickenshit, I’ll pose the question to you: How confident could we be of entering into a wager with people who told us in the ‘70s that pollution would cause an Ice Age, told us in the ‘90s that pollution would cause a runaway greenhouse effect, and tell us now - well, hell, they’re so all over the map now with warming and ice ages that they just call it “climate change”, and have never once acknowledged these serial contradictions?
Would you enter into a wager with that kind of slippery character?
So how does panda taste exactly, Tim?
If I swapped it for the turkey on Sunday is the family likely to notice?Posted by SwinishCapitalist on 2005 12 19 at 03:58 PM • permalinkBear is supposed to taste like pork. Pandas are bears (I spent my whole life being told that they are actually giant racoons. But whatever). Therefore, pandas probably taste like pork.
Dave S., the charity website takes the money from both bettors and gives it to the charity chosen by the winner, so no one has to worry about the trust issue. See here or here for more information.
I don’t know a good solution for the for-profit bet, unless both bettors can agree on a trusted person to hold the money.
Posted by schmidtb98 on 2005 12 19 at 07:51 PM • permalinkJic—Bear is much gamier than pork. Black bear anyway.
Posted by richard mcenroe on 2005 12 19 at 09:45 PM • permalinkDave S., the charity website takes the money from both bettors and gives it to the charity chosen by the winner, so no one has to worry about the trust issue.
Good God, do you people have any reading comprehension skills at all? That wasn’t the problem I was addressing. Read my post again. Sound out the letters.
Sorry, Dave S., I’ll have to give up our conversation - I’m looking for bettors, and you’re not serious about betting.
If there’s someone else here who thinks that despite my ethical inferiority, it would be a good idea to win my money for the charity of your choice, you can do it through the links above.
Posted by schmidtb98 on 2005 12 20 at 12:27 AM • permalinkjic—Never had wild boar; I’d guess “yes”, since, well, the boar is pretty much starting from a bacon baseline…
Posted by richard mcenroe on 2005 12 20 at 09:18 PM • permalink
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So a slightly warmer day does prove global warming?