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POLITICIAN "READY TO DIE"
Joh Bjelke-Petersen, a wonderful old fellow who set the local benchmark for leftoid enragement in the 1970s, is gravely ill. Perhaps you once met him, or lived in Queensland during his happy reign; tell any Joh-related stories in comments.
Athough the The “Joe for PM” push in the 1980’s was just madness, the role Sir Joe played in the early demise of the Whitlam Government qualifies him for the status of national hero.
BTW, we should un-ban Bryla for the day to get his perspective. Didn’t Sir Joe throw him in Boggo Road gaol “for his political activities” or something? Or was that just more Bryla horseshit?
When I was a young pinko, I hated the old sod, don’t you worry about that, mu goodness gracious. It probably goes back to when I was in grade 10 in Rockhampton, and my school invited the bastard to its speech night. He wouldn’t shut up- must have banged on for about three hours; what was amusing, however, was the then mayor of Rockhampton, an irascible character called Rex Pilbeam, who was seated to one side of the stage occupied by Joh. Rex was known to enjoy the odd refreshing libation, and was shitfaced; as Joh droned on, Rex kept nodding off and snoring, only to be poked in the ribs by his long-suffering wife. Rex would grunt, pick his nose, scratch his bollocks/arse, and nod off again. I for one won’t miss the hypocritical old windbag, but the current Beattie regime makes me look back on the Joh era with some fondness. Sure they were so crooked they had to screw their pants on in the morning, and the Qld cops were just as likely to beat the snot out of you or load you up as look at you, but they were a great source of painful teenage protest songs for a plethora of god-awful bands (mine among them), and everything worked and was cheap. Under the Cheshire Cat and his retinue of diseased and duplicitous defectives nothing works, everything costs a poultice, the cops infest the roads with speed cameras and they’re every bit as bent as Russ Hinze but are sanctimonious about it, and refer every time they’re sprung to a tame CJC which is staffed by their mates.
Queensland- beautiful one day, fucked up the next.
Best Joh line- "If you fly with the crows, squark like a crow and look like a crow, you can’t complain if you’re shot like a crow”. (In reference to a “beauty queen” who was arrested at a right-to-march protest, and bitched about it to the media).I remember Joh appearing on a tv show in the 60’s(70’s?) following an election win. Also on the show was a lefty journalist who asked something along the lines of “how can you justify being the government when you didn’t get 50% of the vote?”
Joh looked at him and said “Well we didn’t contest every seat.” It stopped the journalist in his tracks and to me ranks with Margaret Thatcher for making journo’s look foolish.
Well,
Let’s look at this way. Joh’s humiliating demise from power at the hands of the Fitzgerald Inquiry made it much more easier for Queensland University students to get their hands on a franger.
Beats the old glad-wrap and rubber band job that some students resorted to during Joh’s era.
Posted by Joe Strummer on 2005 04 18 at 09:30 PM • permalinkI rembmer one valentine’s day (1985?)having dinner with my girlfriend of the time up at the Mt Cootha restuarant when Joh took on the SEQUEB union (electricity suppliers). We had a lovely time watching as different parts of the grid were switched on and off across Brisbane to stop overloading the supply.
One of the more amusing things about that time was watching that idiot George Georges prat on in defence of the union.There was also Joh’s honourary degree provided by UQ.
Now, while it is well known that all but one of Joh’s Cabinet did not have a tertiary qualification (and that one degree was often disparaged as ‘only’ an ag science degree)you would think that after years of being responsible for a significant amount of state legislation he probably qualified, if only as a knowledgable bush lawyer.
The thing is, the student’s (and academics) union went spaco and was trying to organise massive protests. In the end, windows were broken, etc, etc. He still got his degree.
Truth be known, the majority of the students couldn’t care less, but got a lot of amusement out of the union carry on - they were a bunch of pathetic trotskiets at the time.Met Joh a couple of times back when I was a young-un. My cousin used to work for him and as a result he was at her wedding and other miscellaneous crap.
The media however seemed to imply that my other cousin worked for him in some way shape or form. I mean, how was Luke supposed to know that he should declare that he was a memeber of the Young Nats when he was put on Johs jury?
Ah, good times.
My best memeory of Joh:
During an early protest by aboriginals, Joh was surrounded by chanting demonstrators. One pushed his way forward and handed Joh a small bottle - which he said contained ‘aboriginal blood’ and was meant to represent the so-called genocide of the aboriginal race. Joh’s reply?
Joh said that he would have been much more impressed if the bottle had contained aboriginal sweat.
My favourite memory was attending the launching of a new brick at the Cultural Centre. Those were the days when we got our priorities right :)
The entertainment was a comedian doing a Joh impersonation.
He did Joh attending a Premiers’ Conference.
The Prime Minister, Bob Hawke, comes up to him and greets him. “Gidday, Joh, how are you”
“It’s SIR JOH, you little shit”, was the reply.
Brought the house down :)
Mike G: Try looking at this as a gold mine of the google-worthy. In any case, you might want to add something like this one to your bookmarks/favorites: Aussie Slang
You ask me those questions and I say to you that if you want me to, if you want me to, you know, to answer your, well you asking me like that, well I’ll just say to you, er, I say to you, what you’re asking me right now is something I, I’ll just say this to you, yes, so don’t you worry about that.
- Joh “feeding the chooks” (talking to journos).
Just leave that paper bag over there.
- Joh’s cabinet encouraging free enterprise (for a small gratuity).
How to explain Johannes Bjelke-Petersen to a US Audience?
Think of George Wallace.
Add a smidgin of Huey Long.He’s someone who “couldn’t recall” receiving a brown paper bag full of untraceable cash, and the jury (whose foreman turned out later to be a National party operative) bought it.
He’s someone whose popularity rested on the fact that his opponents were at least as bad, and Moonbats to boot.
I’m from Canberra, and not being a Queenslander, I can’t understand it either. I guess you just had to be there.
Libel laws prevent me from discussing exactly what a cab driver told me about who owned what brothels in Brisbane in the mid 80’s. It was completely blatant.
I will say this : many political opponents underestimated Joh, and all paid the price. One of a kind.
My own Joh story is about his wife, Lady Florence Bjelke-Petersen, a “simple country girl” whose main claim to fame was her recipe for pumpkin scones.
I’m not making this up.
She was elected to the Federal Senate by Joh’s machinations, just to rub salt into the wounds of Leftists. They frothed at the mouth, with some good reason, at this appalling travesty of the political process.
Joh saying “I’m a Fascist Dictator, what you gonna do about it?”She was universally reviled, on both the left and the not-actually-fascist right, as being the personification of all that was rotten and corrupt about Queensland Politics. A terminally ignorant and rather dull Country Bumpkin, totally out of her depth.
I met Lady Florence on a flight from Canberra to Sydney, the day she retired.
I’ve never met anyone with a more keen intellect. She was relaxed, and didn’t bother to put on the “simple country girl” mask, as we talked about telecommunications, how they used IP protocols to communicate with remote irrigation systems on the farm, operating systems on their farm network etc.
It wasn’t just that her grasp of politics was so extraordinarily competent, she was a true Polymath.
Out of habit, she’d sometimes slip into “simple country girl” mode, but then go back to razor-sharp intellect mode, sometimes within the same sentence.
This was a revelation to me, as it proved that most of what I thought I knew about politics was completely wrong.
We will not see their like again.
She was a Brisbane girl actually, hooked up with joh when she was his typist. I still think she was a ‘tard though. Nowhere near as big an asset to the senate as Albert Patrick Field.
Joh and the Nats were always (at least fiscally) restrained by having the liberal leader as Treasurer during their coalition (and the coalition itself at least kept labor out). I used to hate Joh with a passion, but after experiencing truly bad goverment (and at a federal level) under Keating, Joh doesn’t seem anywhere near as bad.
Posted by David McBryde on 2005 04 19 at 01:07 AM • permalinkMike G. and aebrain-
Thank you.
I started reading this thread and began to worry that the flashbacks were kicking in again.
Posted by Dennis The Peasant on 2005 04 19 at 01:08 AM • permalinkI always loved the day when Joh was in a panel discussion with Charles Perkins, who had campaigned on an idea of changing the states’ names into ‘Aboriginal’ ones. Joh asked Perkins straight out if he was then going to change his name to “Mr. Witchety Grub”. Needless to say after that, the idea never really got off the ground.
Mixed feelings about Joh:
Good: The first 15 years of his 18 year premiership. Turned Queensland into the low tax, high growth state of Australia.
Good: He forced the Qld ALP to be the most socially and economically conservative ALP in Oz, because they knew that if they were as bad on the tax and spend as their interstate bretheren they’d never be elected in Qld.
Good: Peerless left baiting, and watching the lefties froth at getting outsmarted by what they thought was a dumb country hickBad: Corruption (Terry Lewis et al)
Bad: Gullibility (Mylan Brych et al)
Bad: The last 3 years of his premiership when he started to believe his own publicity.Overall he would be much better remembered if he’d retired one election earlier than he did.
I had a “Joh for PM” sticker on my Austin 1800 when I was at UWA in the late 80’s. Did it mainly to piss-off the Resistance types on Campus. Used to get parked in by those fucked out old Renaults with land-rights for gay whales stickers all over them and it gave me great delight that I didn’t give a flying about putting dents in the old Austin getting out of car parking spaces. Supported Joh because the Libs were far too wet - still are, but better than letting the ALP run the joint.
He might have been a bastard, but he was our bastard.
AEBrain your observation re Flo reflects badly on the faith we (used) to place in the media.
Joh was portrayed as some ignorant greedy money grubbing right wing capitalist monster when in fact he was charismatic, hard working, clever, principled and not all that wealthy.
OK so he cant construct an ‘argument’ like Larva thingummy but so what? He was motivated by construction not erudition.
Looking back the media (and the public) treated him unfairly .
My memories of QLD in the ‘60s was of a gloriously free, maybe a tad naive (but so was I) place full of space. The cops were never much of a problem, the ‘police state’ charges were just some hyped up Art grad hysteria.
I used to know the legal for Utah who dealt with Joh, he said they were all highly principled and did their deals, which were quite complex, and they proposed to invest heavily in Australia. Utah eventually pulled out of Australia, political problems (unions etc).
Same old story..
Most of my family who come from Queensland were big Joh supporters during his premiership ... Joh had the hearts and minds of the middle class ... those not from Queensland just couldn’t understand him or understand those who voted for him. The press tried to give him a hard time ... I was always amused that he would often refer to his media conferences, and whilst at them, as feeding the chooks. No, I’m not a banana bender, as I get frequently reminded from my family who still reside up there.
I was involved in negotiations between Japan and Queensland over a certain mineral resource during the Joh era. Previously I’d only ever seen the guy on TV doing the “by golly, just you, by golly...” routine. By noon of the first day it was apparent that what people saw of Joh publicly bore no resemblance to reality. Joh not only spoke coherently on technical matters, but he was clearly a master negotiator who gave the consortium of Japanese companies in question as a good a run for its money as I’m sure it ever got (and I speak with some experience on this). Negotiating deals of this sort is not for the mindless, and Joh was one of the best I’ve seen.
Does anyone remember a Sir Joh interview where he was rattled by a question about the ‘separation of powers’?. What was that all about?
(From Previous post)
He was actually asked that by counsel assisting while giving evidence before the Fitzgerald Inquiry. Sir Joe didn’t know the meaning of ‘separation of powers’ causing much mirth to journalists who probably didn’t know either.
I also found the concept a little puzzling in the context that he was asked the question. The separation of powers means that legislative, executive and judicial functions should be vested in separate bodies that are independent of each other. But Joe was being interrogated about political influence over the police. The police are an organ of the executive branch of government which Joe headed, so I fail to see how it even applied in that context.
It was like the “please explain” of its time.
For us banana benders north of the Rio Grande it was a love/hate relationship. At least he was one of those rare pollys who (mostly) stuck to his guns whether right or wrong, so at least we knew what we were getting. And who could forget big Russ Hinze with the puffed face and those eyebrows. Minister for everything IIRC.
Joh copped merry hell from the press for the gobbledegook and fumble speak but that belied a mind as sharp as a tack. Someone once told me the stumbling speech was actually an impediment related to a bout of polio when he was a child and that his thought processes were always far ahead of his mouth.
Mike G - For your benefit anyone south of the Queensland/New South Wales border is considered a Mexican....hence the Rio Grande reference.
No rog, I just don’t do drooling revisionist apologies for corrupt asshole politicians
I hope you apply that rule consistently Tex?
This is like watching one of your State of Origins!
Posted by chinesearithmetic on 2005 04 19 at 09:29 AM • permalink"Who wants to stick together with them and get your stick feet, you know, if you get, stick foot on sticky paper, you get both of them on, you fall over and Mr Hawke asks us to stick with him. You put your foot on sticky paper with him, he’s, and Keating, his government’s got their feet on sticky paper, my word, they have.”
- Sir Joh Bjelke-Petersen… on the Hawke/Keating slogan “Let’s stick together”
God’s Teeth! I almost can’t wait until the current Mayor Daley (y’know, of Da City - Chicago) shuffles off the mortal coil. Then I’ll hope for similar commentary…
Posted by Major John on 2005 04 20 at 02:18 AM • permalinkThanks Good Face. I remember that, but couldn’t recall enough to retrieve it.
Off-island viewers: that’s a real quote. As is this, when questioned by a journalist about his shares in a company that was tendering for a government contract (while he was head of government):
“you can pursue that line as much as you like but the main point about it is, I think everybody—they like to see people, ah—in government or in head of a business, who have demonstrated that they themselves in their own capacity have been able to achieve something in their—in their life. And, ah—we have certainly seen—sought to be constructive, be productive, on the land, in various other undertakings, ah, and I hope you’re not suggesting that this shouldn’t be and that you should have someone or—other that wasn’t capable of doing something of this nature.”
gee tex- i sometimes say some stupid and nasty stuff on this site but you’ve raised the bar. congrats peckerhead!
Posted by Lucky Nutsacks on 2005 04 20 at 04:48 AM • permalinkThose quotes do have a Daley-esque quality to them. Here’s a typical Daley press conference quote:
REPORTER: So you’re saying that when close personal friends of your family were given lucrative trucking contracts, you knew nothing about it?
DALEY: I don’t know, I mean, the Mayor doesn’t look at every, we have people, I mean, people should do their jobs, they should brush their teeth, too, it’s not my job to brush their teeth, I don’t think, you know, do people want to see their mayor doing dental work, I mean, you walk down the street, you don’t want to go walking down the streets without any pants on, we have people for that, and we have people to look into the people, and we’re going to look into that, and I hope to find the answer just like you do, but it’s not my job to put on your pants for you.
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