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PASS THE DUTCHIE ... TEST

Prospective immigrants to Australia once had to pass a 50-word European language test (the Immigration Restriction Act also barred “any idiot or insane person�, a regulation that ought to be revived). The Dutch are taking things even further:

People applying to live in the Netherlands will have to take an examination to prove that they understand the language and culture, the government has proposed.

The test will require 350 hours of study and cost £250.

It is the latest sign of the growing hard line on immigration after decades in which Holland has been one of Europe’s most relaxed nations.

350 hours? That’s more study than I’ve completed in my entire life.

Posted by Tim B. on 02/06/2005 at 02:57 AM
  1. 350 hours?  F_ck me days!! bring it on Australia!! imagine… literate middle eastern car rebirthers and drugs/weapons dealers! woohoo!!

    Posted by Lucky Nutsacks on 2005 02 06 at 04:14 AM • permalink

  2. The Dutch had a reputation in the past for driving a hard bargain - perhaps even more so than the Scots - they need to rediscover this if they are to be tough enough for the task ahead.

    Posted by blogstrop on 2005 02 06 at 04:47 AM • permalink

  3. I’d require a Japanese driver’s license as well.  Make it sort of a treasure hunt.

    Posted by rhhardin on 2005 02 06 at 04:48 AM • permalink

  4. ..and a wigwam for a goose’s bridle..

    Posted by rog2 on 2005 02 06 at 04:51 AM • permalink

  5. Good for them. They must enforce this requirement though, no exceptions.

    Will the Dutch allow for exceptions if people claim some sort of discrimination because of this?

    I wish them well as they try this, but I wonder if Dutch multi-cultis will cause problems and derail this? This is ground zero for the multi-cultis and I can’t imagine they’ll allow this to happen. At the very least, they’ll try and have all kinds of exceptions made to this law.

    Posted by CJosephson on 2005 02 06 at 06:17 AM • permalink

  6. Going Dutch isn’t kosher. In fact, it might upset the authorities.

    Posted by exit ramp on 2005 02 06 at 07:43 AM • permalink

  7. What a way to wake up.  This is hilarious.  350 hours of study????  Whoa. Way to go.

    Posted by blerp on 2005 02 06 at 09:17 AM • permalink

  8. What kind of immigration policy does a country full of crack addicts, prostitutes and child pornographers implement? The policy they’ve had for the last 30 years of course. The Dutch couldn’t organize a piss-up at a brewery let alone reform their destructive immigration system. It won’t be long before the answer sheet to the Dutchie test is selling on the Arab street for pennies while immigration lawyers in Amsterdam tie up the courts with appeals and charges of discrimination on behalf of every failed applicant. The Dutch don’t need more immigration rules and loopholes; they need to stop the flow until the immigrants they already have are assimilated. Instead their government is implementing a meaningless ‘test’. The Dutch have set the benchmark for how not to run a country and everyone else should pay attention.

    Posted by Arty on 2005 02 06 at 10:04 AM • permalink

  9. Ik spraak een bitje Nederlands, maar niet well. (I speak a little Dutch, but not well).

    Look, as they say in Germany, Dutch isn’t a language, but a Throat Disease. (Nerderlandisch kein sprache ist, nuer Halskrankheit).

    250 hours is probably not enough for many. Ok if you speak English, German, Danish etc as a first language, and Arabic and Hebrew pronunciations are quite similar, but anyone else, Forget It.

    Tot Ziens

    Posted by Zoe Brain on 2005 02 06 at 11:53 AM • permalink

  10. To immigrate to Australia you have to take an exam called IELTS. I’m an IELTS examiner, so the person who decides whether they can live in Australia or not is me.

    Posted by harry hutton on 2005 02 06 at 12:29 PM • permalink

  11. “(the Immigration Restriction Act also barred “any idiot or insane personâ€?, a regulation that ought to be revived)”

    So Margo’s a native then?

    Posted by Ross on 2005 02 06 at 03:29 PM • permalink

  12. An idiot? In Australia? That isn’t as uncommon as you might think.

    Posted by harry hutton on 2005 02 06 at 03:55 PM • permalink

  13. Ross beat me to it.

    What to do about the indigenous idiots???

    Posted by jlc on 2005 02 06 at 05:00 PM • permalink

  14. “What kind of immigration policy does a country full of crack addicts, prostitutes and child pornographers implement?”

    I thought this was a crack about Australia’s convict roots for a moment.

    Posted by PJ on 2005 02 06 at 07:05 PM • permalink

  15. If this were happening in the U.S. rather than the Netherlands we wouldn’t have needed to come here to find out about it. Can you imagine the endless howls of highly contrived outrage on our pulic broadcaster? Thank Christ it was France and not the U.S. who banned head scarves in public schools. Had the U.S. imposed such a ban, there isn’t a reading high enough on the Richter scale which could have accomodated an eruption of THAT magnitude! It constantly amazes me what the Europeans, and other non-Western countries regularly get away with!

    Posted by Brian on 2005 02 06 at 08:31 PM • permalink

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