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OL' LIZARD EYES

Cincinnnati Post managing editor Mark Neikirk:

With his lizard eyes and pale, pasty, pudgy face, Al Gore lacks the weathered-by-wind look authors out to save nature ought to have.

Unfair! You try living in a permanent Gore Effect, pal. You’re not exactly going to get a suntan.

UPDATE. Al’s pal totally beclowns herself:

Actress Cameron Diaz appears to have committed a major fashion faux pas in Peru. The voice of Princess Fiona in the animated “Shrek” films may have inadvertently offended Peruvians who suffered decades of violence from a Maoist guerrilla insurgency by touring here Friday with a bag emblazoned with one of Mao Zedong’s favorite political slogans ...

Diaz wore over her shoulder an olive green messenger bag emblazoned with a red star and the words “Serve the People” printed in Chinese on the flap, perhaps Chinese Communist leader Mao’s most famous political slogan.

Posted by Tim B. on 06/23/2007 at 11:24 AM

  1. "Intimacy with glaciers is refreshing while baking atop burning sand and under a searing sun."

    Ha ha ha. I like it.

    Must find an opportunity to steal that line.

    Posted by Ash_ on 2007 06 23 at 11:36 AM • permalink

  2. Global warmin, global coolin, we’re still sailing tomorow out of Newcastle. Unlike the Pasha Bulker.

    Posted by mareeS on 2007 06 23 at 11:46 AM • permalink

  3. One of Gore’s climatroids , apparently dressed in the cast-off clothes of the Scarecrow from The Wizard of Oz, tells it like it ain’t.

    Posted by paco on 2007 06 23 at 11:55 AM • permalink

  4. LOL. Paco, that was great. I love a good laugh.

    Posted by Ash_ on 2007 06 23 at 11:58 AM • permalink

  5. Slightly O/T, but in connection with leftist propaganda in general, I see that Australians have something interesting to watch on TV.

    Posted by paco on 2007 06 23 at 12:05 PM • permalink

  6. #5 Indeed we do Paco.

    They’ve repeated it at least four times this week. Fortunately, the first time I had an appointment to clean up the elephant enclosure at Melbourne Zoo. The second time, I required sewing needles to be inserted under my toenails. The third time, I’m pretty sure I was washing my hair that day. All day. And the fourth time I was busy filling in forms for the impending birth with the name “Packypus”.

    Posted by Ash_ on 2007 06 23 at 12:10 PM • permalink

  7. #6: Obviously, Ash, your time was much better employed.

    Posted by paco on 2007 06 23 at 12:11 PM • permalink

  8. With his lizard eyes ..., Al Gore...

    Wait.  Al Gore as Jean Genie?

    Sits like a man but smiles like a reptile....
    Posted by Apostic on 2007 06 23 at 12:15 PM • permalink

  9. #7 Probably significantly more truthful too. And enjoyable.

    Not to be cruel to those elephants, but every time I turned around and saw their rear ends, I was sure Al Gore was following me.

    Posted by Ash_ on 2007 06 23 at 12:15 PM • permalink

  10. Paco, did I ever tell you about the misfortune that occurred to a copy of “Bowling for Columbine” that was gifted to me?

    Posted by Ash_ on 2007 06 23 at 12:19 PM • permalink

  11. Lizard eyes.  What a perfectly apt description!

    As for Cameron Diaz, she’s merely typical of the average Hollywood liberal:  political philosophy as fashion accessory.

    Posted by RebeccaH on 2007 06 23 at 12:23 PM • permalink

  12. "Serve the People”.

    Reminds me of that Twilight Zone episode, where the aliens had a book called “To Serve Man”.  Turns out it was with a bearnaise sauce.

    Or maybe Mao used sweet & sour?  Lord knows he had a few dozen bodies to work with.

    Oh, and Cameron Diaz is a twat.

    Posted by Tex Lovera on 2007 06 23 at 12:35 PM • permalink

  13. Serve the people OK Cameron, I’ll take a beer.  In a cold glass.  Make it a hefeweissen, with a lemon wedge.

    Posted by rbj1 on 2007 06 23 at 12:37 PM • permalink

  14. #10: No, I don’t believe you mentioned it. I assume it died a grusesome death?

    Posted by paco on 2007 06 23 at 12:55 PM • permalink

  15. #14 I left it on the floor just after I opened it, and then I wandered off to do something.

    When I came back a while later, I found that the cat had crouched atop it and did something that smelled horrifically nasty. I wasn’t sure whether to punish the cat for doing such things inside, or whether to praise it for doing such things on a Michael Moore DVD.

    Posted by Ash_ on 2007 06 23 at 12:59 PM • permalink

  16. A few more of the gang from Huckabee’s Heroes

    Posted by paco on 2007 06 23 at 01:08 PM • permalink

  17. 12

    Chairman Mao (cue graphic: Picture of Mao) was finally laid to rest this week after much discussion as to what to do with his body. After weeks of debate, it was decided that the fallen Chinese leader be buried in a takeout cemetery. (cue graphic: gigantic folded cardboard carryout container.) The family decided this would be best, as it’s cheaper, it’s open twenty-four hours a day, and it’s within delivery distance of Peking.

    - Saturday Night Live, “Weekend Update” 23 October 76

    Posted by Apostic on 2007 06 23 at 01:20 PM • permalink

  18. Lizard eyes : somebody noticed that Gore’s eyes move independently.

    Posted by rhhardin on 2007 06 23 at 01:48 PM • permalink

  19. "Huckabee’s Heroes”

    Excellent. Is that one of yours, paco?

    Posted by Spiny Norman on 2007 06 23 at 01:52 PM • permalink

  20. Lizard eyes : somebody noticed that Gore’s eyes move independently
    Heh.  I suppose after a couple of decades of periodic personal reinvention, he might seem rather chameleon like.
    Posted by Apostic on 2007 06 23 at 01:56 PM • permalink

  21. #18 Lizard eyes : somebody noticed that Gore’s eyes move independently.

    Does this have anything to do with the birth of Al Gore coming almost exactly nine months after the Roswell, New Mexico “landing”?

    Posted by Bruce Lagasse on 2007 06 23 at 02:19 PM • permalink

  22. #19 Spiney: Yes; he does admire that lot, so.

    Posted by paco on 2007 06 23 at 03:15 PM • permalink

  23. They always leave the last word of that Mao quote off.  It should read Serve the people up.

    Posted by saltydog on 2007 06 23 at 03:22 PM • permalink

  24. Marginally OT.

    Didja hear about Stevie Wonder’s comeback album??

    "Ol’ no eyes is black"

    Posted by Jack from Montreal on 2007 06 23 at 03:23 PM • permalink

  25. I’ll have you know, that Mao did “Serve the People”.

    He just served them to other people.

    Posted by El Cid on 2007 06 23 at 05:53 PM • permalink

  26. #3 Paco
    Not quite what I expected, although the blue scarf makes her look guru-like.
    President of a company, that makes her really important, doesn’t it. Earnest. She’s really earnest about saving the world.
    And she is a university academic.
    I stopped watching.

    Posted by kae on 2007 06 23 at 06:22 PM • permalink

  27. #24
    Have you ever seen Stevie Wonder’s house?

    Posted by kae on 2007 06 23 at 06:34 PM • permalink

  28. #24, 27

    Don’t worry, neither has he.

    Posted by kae on 2007 06 23 at 06:35 PM • permalink

  29. #16 Paco

    I find that report a bit sus… it seems to say that the atrocity was reported by the BBC.  Unlikely of them to report such a thing so unfavourable to the islafascists.

    But if there had been a coalition helo within 50 miles.....

    Cheers
    RodC

    Posted by Rod C on 2007 06 23 at 06:38 PM • permalink

  30. You think that’s bad, Diaz still doesn’t get why her “lebensraum for Palestine” bumpersticker went over so poorly in Stuttgart…

    Posted by richard mcenroe on 2007 06 23 at 06:38 PM • permalink

  31. Perhaps not my place to comment, but I doubt that tired old ‘jokes’ about a blind man have any place here, even were they relevant to the point under discussion.

    Cheers
    RodC

    Posted by Rod C on 2007 06 23 at 07:01 PM • permalink

  32. #31
    Lighten up, RodC!

    Posted by kae on 2007 06 23 at 07:07 PM • permalink

  33. While dutifully getting my car scammed by a useless tax grab emissions-tested today, the waiting lounge featured the superb treat of a TV playing ‘An Inconvenient Truth’.

    I had almost forgotten how whiny, shitty, melodramatic, self-congratulatory and above all INACCURATE that travesty of a fifth-grader’s PowerPoint presentation is.

    Posted by Crispytoast on 2007 06 23 at 07:36 PM • permalink

  34. #30 Richard,
    ROFLMAO!

    Posted by Michael Lonie on 2007 06 23 at 08:17 PM • permalink

  35. Bah.

    This is just like when another hottie, Pamela Anderson supported the excreable PETA.

    It changes nothing I tell you.

    Hell, I’ve just learnt that Angelina Jolie is a hardcore lefty moonbat who indirectly supports the people who beheaded Daniel Pearl. I’d still have a go.

    Posted by Dan Lewis on 2007 06 23 at 09:30 PM • permalink

  36. On the Diaz bag: I can’t find a single photo that shows the bag clearly enough so that I can actually see whether it has 为人民服务 written on it. The blurred characters look like the five required (although it’s impossible to tell exactly), but didn’t anyone get a shot of the bloody slogan so that it could be seen plainly? The msm really is pathetic. Give us a photo we can read, man…

    Posted by Hanyu on 2007 06 24 at 12:12 AM • permalink

  37. Mention the horrors of the Cultural Revolution to Cameron Diaz or Drew Barrymore or some other professional goodlooker, and they’re likely to think it has something to do with Evangelical Christian Republicans.

    Posted by Mark V. on 2007 06 24 at 12:16 AM • permalink

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