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MYLAR GENERATION

Besides the general wussiness and behind-the-curvedness of Time’s Person of the Year selection, there’s a kind of obvious conceptual flaw:

image

Here’s Time managing editor Rick Stengel:

We chose to put a mirror on the cover because it literally reflects the idea that you, not we, are transforming the information age. The 2006 Person of the Year issue—the largest one Time has ever printed—marks the first time we’ve put reflective Mylar on the cover. When we found a supplier in Minnesota, we made the company sign a confidentiality agreement before placing an order for 6,965,000 pieces. That’s a lot of Mylar.

Thing is, Rick, what you’ve got here is a cover celebrating the information age—but it only works in print. Apparently this was “unanticipated”:

Designing a cover with a Mylar window does create one unanticipated challenge: How do you display it online when there’s no one standing in front of it? If you go to Time.com, you’ll see an animated version of the cover in which the window is stocked with a rotating display of reader-submitted photos. Maybe you’ll see yourself.

Mylar was invented in the early ’50s.

UPDATE. Paco asks: “What happens if somebody leaves the book lying around the zoo and a chimp picks it up. Isn’t he likely to get above himself, maybe start putting on airs around his fellows?”

Posted by Tim B. on 12/17/2006 at 08:36 AM
  1. Oh great. Once the “Man” (Later “Person") “of the Year” qualification at least aspired to pick one human being who stood out from the others by grace of spectacular achievement. Many of their choices may have been dubious, to say the least (Hitler, etc.), but at least the idea was “extraordinary person, someone we can possibly admire and even imitate” (of course, excepting Hitler etc.). Now every shlub who owns a computer and is stupid enough to still read Time magazine is held up as An Example For Us All. We already have a problem with overweening egos who know all their rights and none of their responsibilities, now they are People of the Year. I expect it will be even more dangerous for old ladies like me to cross the street from now on, because every Mister POY will be on his cell phone and typing on his laptop while steering with one elbow. Gotta keep that information highway clear of pedestrians!

    Posted by Andrea Harris, Administrator on 2006 12 17 at 09:14 AM • permalink

  2. Person of the Year. You Anyone named Narcissus or Onan

    Posted by Skeeter on 2006 12 17 at 09:17 AM • permalink

  3. Wow, this is totally unexpected! I’d like to thank the members of the academy, my lovely wife and my wonderful kids.  This is for you, dad!

    Posted by slammer on 2006 12 17 at 09:22 AM • permalink

  4. It’s Peter Brady! I always knew he’d end up on the cover of Time Magazine, even if it has to be in digital form. And after all this time. I sooo loved him in his breakthrough role in “The Invisible Man” in 1951. I thought he was more mature as an actor in “The Man Who Never Was,” but his finest performance was as the best friend of the MWNW in MWNWII, for which he won the film industry’s first invisible oscar. Superb acting by a wonderful actor, the likes of whom will never again grace the screen. Unfortunately, he has disappeared without trace.

    Posted by mareeS on 2006 12 17 at 09:26 AM • permalink

  5. Gee, I’ve always wanted to be on the cover of Time. Now I can see myself reflected in Mylar™. Hey, it’s cheaper than those carnival booths where they print your picture on a “magazine cover” for $5.

    Seriously, though, this shows better than anything how Time, and the rest of the MSM, has run out of ideas. Last one out of the building turn out the lights.

    Posted by ErnieG on 2006 12 17 at 09:43 AM • permalink

  6. So, uh, do we all get signed certificates and a lifetime subscription?

    Posted by Dan Lewis on 2006 12 17 at 09:45 AM • permalink

  7. Yes. Mine is expected to arrive about April 1st.

    Posted by CB on 2006 12 17 at 10:06 AM • permalink

  8. (wronwright nods at knowledge that Minnesota company is a wholly owned subsidiary of Paco Industries with Lileks name showing up on incorporation papers as front owner. recall how Lileks thought he was signing soccer sign up sheet for gnat)

    ** chuckles **

    (smiles knowingly at preemptive move to place George Bush’s and Karl Rove’s faces in mylar square, that can only be seen when the reader looks closely trying to see their own ugly mug)

    ** chuckles **

    (smiles when recalling how wronwright included himself, in just 20 issues, standing behind Bush and Karl holding Zulu spear and Norman shield)

    ** chuckles **

    (gratified that Andrea’s ugly face—ok, not so ugly face—all right, an admittedly attractive yet evil!! face was not included because she was distracted by The Pirate King and other trollbots)

    ** bawahahahahahahahahahaha **

    Posted by wronwright on 2006 12 17 at 10:09 AM • permalink

  9. As others have pointed, this is narcisstic and self-indulgent......not to mention pandering to the masses.  “Lookee!  You’re on the cover of Time! Well, sort of.  But still, it’s KEWL, with that mylar and all!!!”

    Time staff—comprised primarily of twits.

    Thing is, Rick, what you’ve got here is a cover celebrating the information age—but it only works in print.

    Dinosaur media, indeed.

    Posted by The_Real_JeffS on 2006 12 17 at 10:20 AM • permalink

  10. Why didn’t they just glue this to the cover? At least they might have gotten some kids to purchase their pitiful rag.

    Really, if I hadn’t been informed that the whole thing was a brilliant propaganda move by Wronwright (#8), I wouldn’t have seen the reason for it at all.

    Posted by paco on 2006 12 17 at 10:28 AM • permalink

  11. Any bets that next year they honor Bakelite?

    Posted by monkeyfan on 2006 12 17 at 10:35 AM • permalink

  12. (Puts wronwright’s name on Top Priority Destruction List.)

    Posted by Andrea Harris, Administrator on 2006 12 17 at 11:33 AM • permalink

  13. Time didn’t mean you, they meant me.

    I mean, it said so. Right on the cover.

    Posted by Dr Alice on 2006 12 17 at 11:44 AM • permalink

  14. I think putting Mylar on the cover instead of Bono is a tremendous step forward. Kudos, TIME!

    Posted by Crispytoast on 2006 12 17 at 11:53 AM • permalink

  15. One can only hope that specially produced issue is a big money loser for them.

    As a bonus, that would make it look even more like they’re 5 years behind the curve, i.e. back when nobody was making any money online.

    Posted by PW on 2006 12 17 at 01:03 PM • permalink

  16. Back in the old days it was once said that Life Magazine is for those who can’t read, Time for those who can’t think.

    Time is now run by the latter.

    Posted by Some0Seppo on 2006 12 17 at 01:31 PM • permalink

  17. Countdown to enviroloons shrieking about the ecological footprint of mylar in 5 ... 4 ... 3 ...

    Posted by Achillea on 2006 12 17 at 02:21 PM • permalink

  18. I think back in 2001 the Time weenies were struggling with their Person of the Year. Apparently their rules say it has to be the biggest news-maker and in 2001 that was obviously bin Laden. So they had to make the difficult decision between praising a terrorist or breaking the rules a little bit.

    In the end, I think the NY Mayor, Rudi Guiliani, was given the ‘honour’.

    Posted by Ian Deans on 2006 12 17 at 04:36 PM • permalink

  19. Damn, just when I thought my c.v. was up to date.

    Posted by captain on 2006 12 17 at 05:12 PM • permalink

  20. Andrea’s right. This is not only stupid, it’s just about the laziest thing I ever saw. The point of POY was someone exceptional, wasn’t it? But if everyone is #1, no one is #1. Everyone is equally exceptional, according to a magazine (who then can’t do their special little thingy online due to the limitations of it not being paper) - which means no one is exceptional.

    Lazy, pointless, but certainly not controversial or insulting to the masses, eh?

    Good Gawd, my head hurts…

    Happy Chanukkah, by the way.

    Posted by KC on 2006 12 17 at 05:29 PM • permalink

  21. From a review of the 1996 book “ The Pictorial Guide to the Living Primates”:

    The last species listed is Homo sapiens, with a mirror instead of a photograph accompanying the text!

    It’s a wonderful reference tool and represents the last clever use of mylar in a publication.

    Posted by Donnah on 2006 12 17 at 05:29 PM • permalink

  22. #21: The last species listed is Homo sapiens, with a mirror instead of a photograph accompanying the text!

    Yeah, but what happens if somebody leaves the book lying around the zoo and a chimp picks it up. Isn’t he likely to get above himself, maybe start putting on airs around his fellows?

    “See this, Koko? I’m a Homo sapiens. Not like you lot.”

    Posted by paco on 2006 12 17 at 05:45 PM • permalink

  23. Koko looking: “What are you talking about? I’m the Homo sapiens.”

    Posted by Donnah on 2006 12 17 at 05:52 PM • permalink

  24. Many of their choices may have been dubious, to say the least (Hitler, etc.), but at least the idea was “extraordinary person, someone we can possibly admire and even imitate” (of course, excepting Hitler etc.).

    Hey, come on, Andrea!  George Bernard Shaw lobbied to have Hitler declared Man of the Year, and if you can’t trust a socialist celebrity in the yarts, who can you trust?

    Posted by richard mcenroe on 2006 12 17 at 06:27 PM • permalink

  25. This is not only stupid, it’s just about the laziest thing I ever saw. The point of POY was someone exceptional, wasn’t it? But if everyone is #1, no one is #1. Everyone is equally exceptional, according to a magazine (who then can’t do their special little thingy online due to the limitations of it not being paper) - which means no one is exceptional.

    Auntie KC, I immediately started humming in my head
    If everyone is somebodee, then no-one’s anybody

    with apologies to Gilbert and Sullivan.

    Posted by Dr Alice on 2006 12 17 at 06:39 PM • permalink

  26. #23: See? The next thing you know, you’ve got a chimp riot on your hands.

    Posted by paco on 2006 12 17 at 06:43 PM • permalink

  27. I ran right out the door, down to the store and bought me my copy.

    Got it framed and hanging on the wall now. I even got the checkout girl to sign a congratulatory note on it for all to see :)

    Posted by Grimmy on 2006 12 17 at 06:43 PM • permalink

  28. Time is irritating for other reasons, too.

    Posted by paco on 2006 12 17 at 07:01 PM • permalink

  29. mmmm.  suspicious.

    If you look at the online poll voting, you will see that the readers of Time have overwhelmingly voted for Chavez (35% of the vote) followed by Ahmadinnerjacket (21%).

    Could it be that Time didn’t want to alert the world to just how barking its readers have become?

    Time Poll

    Posted by pommygranate on 2006 12 17 at 07:25 PM • permalink

  30. A bit like the narcissicism of the Baker Commission -it’s all about how the USA FEELS, and how IT will solve its OWN problems. Pathetic.

    Christ said ‘Deny yourself and follow Me’ and nobody has called Him a narcissist, but that’s not good enough for postmodern Time, where Self-esteem Rules OK.

    Has anyone told them that any mirror image is ass-backwards, so is NOT the Real World at all?

    Posted by Barrie on 2006 12 17 at 07:30 PM • permalink

  31. I stopped subscribing to Time years ago.  For a while, I did read it whilst visting he men’s toilet at work, taken out the magazine stockpile.

    Now I don’t even read it there.  Toilet paper on the roll is more interesting and illuminating than Time magazine.

    Posted by The_Real_JeffS on 2006 12 17 at 07:34 PM • permalink

  32. Have you got the whole story?

    Posted by Margos Maid on 2006 12 17 at 07:41 PM • permalink

  33. Yeah, but what happens if somebody leaves the book lying around the zoo and a chimp picks it up. Isn’t he likely to get above himself, maybe start putting on airs around his fellows?

    Never mind the chimps. What’ll happen when an alien gets hold of a copy? And before you scoff, remember all the joyriding wronwright’s been doing in the Tardis.

    Posted by Rob Crawford on 2006 12 17 at 08:35 PM • permalink

  34. But what about the Inert Carbon Rod?

    Posted by Brett_McS on 2006 12 17 at 09:31 PM • permalink

  35. My resume has a new addition: Time Magazines Person of the Year 2006.

    Posted by Infidel Tiger on 2006 12 17 at 10:24 PM • permalink

  36. "All your mylar persona and output is belong to me!”
    Stengali

    Posted by blogstrop on 2006 12 18 at 06:32 AM • permalink

  37. #31: Toilet paper on the roll is more interesting and illuminating than Time magazine.

    Not to mention more absorbent.

    Posted by paco on 2006 12 18 at 09:03 AM • permalink

  38. And since when has Time Magazine published novelty items on its cover? What’s next? Joy buzzer as technology of the century?

    Posted by Some0Seppo on 2006 12 18 at 10:19 AM • permalink

  39. Joy buzzer?

    Is that a PC term for a “sexual aid”?

    Posted by Forbes on 2006 12 18 at 01:53 PM • permalink

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