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MOMENT OF CLARITY

Webdiarist Richard Tonkin:

I’m sitting here today wondering if I’ve spent the last three years in a state of paranoid delusion.

He’s also worried about something called a “meerschacht test”. There’s another $90 wisely invested.

UPDATE. Pixy Misa: “The ‘meerschacht test’ is where you look at pictures of meerkats and tell the psychiatrist that they remind you of your mother.”

Posted by Tim B. on 05/04/2006 at 02:09 AM
  1. I’m sitting here today wondering if I’ve spent the last three years in a state of paranoid delusion.

    The answer is Yes.

    —Nora

    Posted by The Thin Man Returns on 2006 05 04 at 02:27 AM • permalink

  2. Kinda OT but inspired by Tonkin’s existential moment.

    Rene Descartes walks into a bar.
    Bartender says, ‘would you like a drink?’
    Descarte says, ‘I think not.’
    Then POOF he vanishes!

    —Nora

    Posted by The Thin Man Returns on 2006 05 04 at 02:31 AM • permalink

  3. I nearly felt sorry for him, thinking that he may be undergoing the growing pains of a lefty finally reaching adulthood and leaving childish beliefs in governmental hob-goblins, monsters & vampires behind. Then I read his litany of paranoid delusions. Only one thing to say - “Suffer in yer jocks, loser”.

    Posted by Tom H on 2006 05 04 at 02:47 AM • permalink

  4. Seems like he’s getting his Rorschachs confused with his meerkats.

    Posted by Oafish and Infantile on 2006 05 04 at 02:48 AM • permalink

  5. The “meerschacht test” is where you look at pictures of meerkats and tell the psychiatrist that they remind you of your mother.

    Posted by Pixy Misa on 2006 05 04 at 02:51 AM • permalink

  6. Beat me by 3 minutes Oafish.

    Posted by lingus4 on 2006 05 04 at 02:51 AM • permalink

  7. This reminds me of an old Get Smart episode:

    Maxwell Smart, Get Smart’s Agent 86, sits before a psychiatrist who unfolds a piece of paper to reveal an ink blot. “Tell me what you see here, Mr Smart,” he asks.

    “Two people making love,” responds Max.

    The psychiatrist unfolds another five or six ink blots of differing shapes, and each time Max sees “two people making love”.

    “I think you have a fixation with sex, Mr Smart,” says the psychiatrist.

    “Me?” says Max. “You’re the one with the dirty pictures.”

    :)

    Posted by lingus4 on 2006 05 04 at 02:59 AM • permalink

  8. It’s when the psychotherapist is smoking a pipe while he’s testing you with inkblobs.

    Posted by ilibcc on 2006 05 04 at 03:01 AM • permalink

  9. I think he means the “me, er, shocked!” test. You know, the test where you finally look critically at your inner self and are shocked to find you are a utter dipwad.

    Posted by lil varmint on 2006 05 04 at 03:07 AM • permalink

  10. Don’t worry about paranoid delusions - how about just plain nuts, crazy, loopy, kangaroos in the top paddock, round the bend, etc etc etc

    A fine example of the failure of the de-institutionalisation of the the mentally ill.

    Posted by Razor on 2006 05 04 at 03:32 AM • permalink

  11. From that little list, u could safely confirm that not only has he been paranoid delusional for quite some time, but the reason its taken so long for him to suspect it is that he has never been confronted by anyone becoz he is dribbling this tripe to a seriously paranoid delusional community… 

    where quite frankly, the more moonbattish and nonsensical your theories, especially on the US and Joooos, the more farsighted and observant you are considered to be… 

    just another example of this lefty capacity for spouting twisted nonsense, this time outside of Webdiary, can be seen by a recent opinion piece of Philip Adams I was just reading in which he calls GWB insane and says he should be certified, but he calls the fruitcake heading Iran a “ratbag”????

    anyway, if poor old Richard is beginning to wake up and get a bit more of a grasp on reality, i’m not sure how many more articles and plaudits he is going to get from his former adoring mates at that sheltered workshop….  maybe he better start looking around for a new group of people to commune and share his thoughts with….

    Posted by casanova on 2006 05 04 at 03:34 AM • permalink

  12. #11

    Absolutely right

    Many lefties are trapped in a closed loop.
    A self-perpetuating circle of conspiracy theories/theorists that feed paranoia and exclude the truth.
    A world where cognitive dissonance rules, insanity is the norm and truth take a holiday.

    Great to see a lefty have a moment of clarity, unless he is attempting sarcasm.

    Posted by Mike_W on 2006 05 04 at 04:35 AM • permalink

  13. The Meerkat test is pretty infallible. It’s administered on a small hill of dirt, the subject sits alertly upright with his adorable paws and little whiskers twitching. If he’s carried away by an eagle that’s a mark down.

    Of course, nothing in psychiatry could be considered an exact science, but the test is quite effective in establishing which members of the admissions list are susceptible to predatory bird attack, so it’s a useful diagnostic tool of the modern mental health professional.

    Posted by Amos on 2006 05 04 at 05:13 AM • permalink

  14. Words fail me. It’s just a pity they don’t seem to fail him.

    Posted by AlphaMikeFoxtrot on 2006 05 04 at 05:44 AM • permalink

  15. This moonbat doubt unfortunately will disqualify him from taking a job as New York Times editorial writer.

    Posted by rhhardin on 2006 05 04 at 05:48 AM • permalink

  16. Have some pity.

    Here’s a guy who’s slowly coming to the realisation that his whole world-view has been, quite frankly, sheer idiocy.

    It takes courage to admit that, and it must be terribly hurtful and upsetting. Yes, he’s done a lot of harm by this. But don’t you think this is starting to dawn on him?

    He’s been ambushed by one too many Fact. Let the poor so-and-so be, and maybe, just maybe, he might start wanting to atone for his misdeeds and not just sit gibbering in the corner. Or worse, go back to the same old comforting Far-Left insanity. Or is that Far-Right?

    Posted by Zoe Brain on 2006 05 04 at 05:48 AM • permalink

  17. It’s actually a Dutch word, as in “I sink meerschacht mine pants”.

    Posted by anthony_r on 2006 05 04 at 05:58 AM • permalink

  18. #11 Cassanova

    I’ve noticed Phillip Adams has been even more unhinged than usual over the last couple of columns.  My thoery is that he is trying to force the powers that be at The Australian to get bored with their pet lefty and cast him loose, allowing him to wallow in his martyrdom throughout his next gig senescence at the Byron Bay Echo.

    Posted by entropy on 2006 05 04 at 06:24 AM • permalink

  19. I read that WebDiary article earlier today. I was totally blown away.

    Surely the moron was joking around or something? I mean, he should be institutionalised or something!

    Posted by "AK" Adam on 2006 05 04 at 06:24 AM • permalink

  20. #2 - Nora
    Now let’s see. With a name like Rene Descartes and hanging around in bars ...
    You’re right. POOF it is.

    Posted by blogstrop on 2006 05 04 at 07:24 AM • permalink

  21. He’s also worried about something called a “meerschacht test”.

    Dutch phrase. Test to see if you’re a meercat. They have similar ones for most African mammals.

    -Big Al

    Posted by TheRealBigAl on 2006 05 04 at 07:48 AM • permalink

  22. Speaking of paranoid delusions,Looney is Andrew Denton’s bosom buddy on Monday night.
    Fortuitously “Saving Andrew Mallard” (ducks?)lavishly embellished with cellos,violins and rippling piano was on tonight so I could be up to my armpits in misery and guilt.I thought watching Catalyst could provide some light relief but was brought to my knees by the segment on Fine Particles and how they were infiltrating my lungs…

    Posted by crash on 2006 05 04 at 08:52 AM • permalink

  23. Big Al,

    You mean like the aardvark test?

    Posted by ErnieG on 2006 05 04 at 10:15 AM • permalink

  24. You’re thinking of a lion detector.

    Posted by R C Dean on 2006 05 04 at 10:33 AM • permalink

  25. I think the Chunnel might qualify as a meerschacht.

    Posted by PW on 2006 05 04 at 11:00 AM • permalink

  26. I couldn’t win a high school debate with the number of proven “givens” that I’ve gathered, so what right do I have to attempt to convince “society-at-large” to believe me?

    Someone forgot to take his meds today.

    Posted by Mystery Meat on 2006 05 04 at 11:29 AM • permalink

  27. Someone forgot to take his meds today.

    actually I think he started taking them. This guy thought that the apocalypse - in the strictly biblical sense- was really starting, and the two big guys had chosen Adelaide of all places to slug it out. No parody required.
    I hope his journey towards sanity continues.

    Posted by daddy dave on 2006 05 04 at 11:38 AM • permalink

  28. Am I the only one who thinks the guy is just being sarcastic?  That piece reads like a lefty who’s trying to prove lefties have a sense of irony, not to mention humor (and typically failing, I might add).

    It’s just sad that he’s so ignorant, he doesn’t know soapstone Turk’s-head pipes don’t have anything to do with ink blots.

    Posted by RebeccaH on 2006 05 04 at 11:54 AM • permalink

  29. I checked out the comments to his post, and there is no indication that readers saw it as sarcastic or ironic. For someone who is deep in conspiracy theories, some light-hearted wake-up messages are needed. You know, like “history is too complex and messy to be controlled by a conspiracy” or “sometimes things just are as they seem”. Instead, our helpful psychoanalyists at webdiary suggest…

    keep following your gut feelings with honesty

    and

    It is frustrating to find that most people think you’re nuts or, worse, that they’re indifferent. It does cause self-doubt. Be assured that you’re not wrong and you’re not alone

    and so, after his brief “Awakenings” style experience, he will no doubt slip back into the mire of moonbattery.

    Posted by daddy dave on 2006 05 04 at 12:30 PM • permalink

  30. #2 Nora
    Excellent OT; thanks.

    Posted by m on 2006 05 04 at 12:40 PM • permalink

  31. I think Tonkin is using the forum to gain affirmation, saying, “Is everybody else crazy, or is it me? Tell me it’s not me.” To which the commenters are loyally replying, “It’s not you.” Shock.

    Posted by m on 2006 05 04 at 12:57 PM • permalink

  32. You just can’t buy good subeditors.

    At the end of the day, you could hardly call the anti-gravity gun war motive a paranoid delusion.

    Posted by captain on 2006 05 04 at 05:35 PM • permalink

  33. Webdiary is the blogging equivalent of water torture - weeks of tedium punctuated every few months when we get to watch someone have a mental breakdown.

    Posted by Margos Maid on 2006 05 04 at 08:19 PM • permalink

  34. How can we take this idiot seriously when he’s too lazy to Google “inkblot test” and find it’s really called “Rorschach”?  And it’s not even that reliable test?

    And he’s supposed to be a “journalist”? What a maroon.

    Posted by JimC on 2006 05 05 at 10:52 PM • permalink

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