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LESSER MINERALS DISSED

The Age’s Traceeee Hutchison, in her dippiest column since she was smoked, boldly rejects uranium:

No other mineral is connected to the most destructive weapon ever built. It needs to stay in the ground.

No other mineral? That’ll be news to to the A-bomb’s builders.

Posted by Tim B. on 03/30/2007 at 01:22 PM
  1. Only uranium is used.  Okkkkaaayy. 

    I think she’s getting brain damage from inhaling ink fumes. 

    Elizabeth
    Imperial Keeper

    Posted by Elizabeth Imperial Keeper on 2007 03 30 at 01:39 PM • permalink

  2. Aside from the uranium core, the rest of the A-bomb was made out of wood and feathers.  This is why Iran and North Korea have made so much progress developing nuclear weapons, incidentially.

    Posted by Damian P. on 2007 03 30 at 01:41 PM • permalink

  3. Tim, looks like Traceeee has a bit of a problem spelling, too:

    The banner was long enough to span the stage of the Sidney Myer Music Bowl and emblazoned in big yellow letters on it were the words “STOP THE DROP”.

    Posted by Villeurbanne on 2007 03 30 at 01:48 PM • permalink

  4. Nope, I’m the idiot. Sidney is the name of the guy, not the city. Traceeee can spell, I got it wrong.

    Posted by Villeurbanne on 2007 03 30 at 01:50 PM • permalink

  5. Maybe Traceeee would prefer the neutron bomb.  It is also endorsed by all of the realtor organizations.  Think about it.  Or not.

    Posted by yojimbo on 2007 03 30 at 01:50 PM • permalink

  6. See, if it stays in the ground, see, then we can only do underground tests, see, and that is what .... 

    Oh, yeah.  Never mind.

    Posted by SSG Pooh on 2007 03 30 at 01:58 PM • permalink

  7. She doesn’t know much about destructive weapons, either.  Nobody uses Uranium for weapons anymore.  (aside from third-world newbies to the whole A-bomb thing…if it weren’t so useful for peaceful purposes I could almost agree with her for that reason alone.) Plutonium is so much more efficient and is used for the trigger on fusion bombs.  We should ban deuterium and tritium instead.  Hell, just ban water in general to be safe.

    Or lead.  we should leave all the lead in the ground because more people have died from being shot with lead bullets than ever even got sick from those scary uranium bombs.

    I wonder if these people ever give a thought to all the good things we do with nuclear tech?  Every modern hospital I know of has a ‘nuclear medicine’ department.  I have personal reasons to be very grateful for X-ray machines.  (my right hand is in a cast as I type this)  But no, they don’t think.  They just ‘feel’.

    Posted by fclark on 2007 03 30 at 02:03 PM • permalink

  8. Nobody uses Uranium for weapons anymore.

    Ok, depleted uranim rouds for anti-tank use.  Somehow I don’t think that’s what she had in mind, though.

    Posted by fclark on 2007 03 30 at 02:07 PM • permalink

  9. Steel is often used to make the bomb casing.  That metal needs to stay in the ground too!

    Posted by blogagog on 2007 03 30 at 02:08 PM • permalink

  10. A lot of people who mine uranium drink milk.  That liquid needs to stay in the cow.

    Posted by blogagog on 2007 03 30 at 02:09 PM • permalink

  11. We can ban pencils, too, because the use of graphite in nuclear reactors contributed to the development of the A-bomb.  Graphite is a mineral, isn’t it?

    I say, “Down with the pencils of death!”  We should bury all pencils in a landfill and put up signs warning future generations to steer clear.

    Posted by kcom on 2007 03 30 at 02:09 PM • permalink

  12. >Hell, just ban water in general to be safe.

    BAN DIHYDROGEN MONOXIDE!!!

    Do it for the children!

    Posted by Room 237 on 2007 03 30 at 02:53 PM • permalink

  13. How about the Traceeeeeee Hutchison bomb.  Carpet bomb our enemies with leaflets of Traccceeeeeeeee’s columns—they’ll begging to surrender to us in no time.  “Please, for the love of Allah, spare our children this wretched writing.”

    Posted by rbj1 on 2007 03 30 at 03:09 PM • permalink

  14. As Polonium advised Laertes, “to thine own elements be true.”

    Posted by charles austin on 2007 03 30 at 03:12 PM • permalink

  15. #11 -

    You’ll take my Faber-Castell when you pry it from my cold, dead hand.

    Posted by Achillea on 2007 03 30 at 03:12 PM • permalink

  16. Elementary, my dear Traceeee. (And I guess it’s obvious that Traceeee writes for a paper and not for a periodical, either, eh?)

    Posted by andycanuck on 2007 03 30 at 03:20 PM • permalink

  17. Doesn’t the Age have an editor, or fact checker, or something? This kind of ignorance discredits the entire newspaper.

    Posted by Bruce Rheinstein on 2007 03 30 at 03:32 PM • permalink

  18. Traceeee sounds so nostalgic for the heady days of banner-making and dancing and singing.  As far as I can tell, she’s making the dimwit assertion that alternative energy sources should consist of hamsters running in wheels.

    Posted by RebeccaH on 2007 03 30 at 03:35 PM • permalink

  19. Ok, depleted uranim rouds for anti-tank use.  Somehow I don’t think that’s what she had in mind, though.

    Don’t be so sure. She’s probably sure that DU bombs have coated Iraq in a thin layer of highly radioactive dust.

    Posted by Rob Crawford on 2007 03 30 at 03:44 PM • permalink

  20. I say, “Down with the pencils of death!” We should bury all pencils in a landfill and put up signs warning future generations to steer clear.

    They Might Be Gians, “Pencil Rain”:

    The possible dream
    Finale of seem
    The moment that some call eternal that some call insane
    Now helmets on each head awaiting the first lead
    The pageant is named the pencil rain

    The infantry stands
    And holds out its hands
    The marshal’s binoculars focus and skyward they train
    They’re searching the yonder blue
    They look out for number two
    The heraldry of the pencil rain

    And now hear the roar that none can ignore
    The thunderous clatter of splintering wood and lives that are claimed
    And none who have witnessed all
    Can think of a nobler cause than perishing in the pencil rain
    The pencil rain
    The pencil rain
    The pencil rain

    Posted by Rob Crawford on 2007 03 30 at 03:47 PM • permalink

  21. As far as I can tell, she’s making the dimwit assertion that alternative energy sources should consist of hamsters running in wheels.

    Surely not!  What would PETA say?
    From what I’ve been able to discern from the various ravings of the far left the only power source approved for use by humans is human muscle power.  None of them come right out and say that of course, but if you work your way down the list that’s the only one nobody complains about.

    Coal: Don’t be silly
    Oil: Even sillier than coal
    Hydro: Nope, we have to preserve those snail darters.
    Wind: What? And ruin my views??? Think of the poor birds!
    Nukes: Evil.
    Solar: Ok, I guess, so long as you don’t take up precious desert land to produce it in meaningful quantities.

    Don’t even think about abusing those poor oxen by making them work for you.

    Best I can figure the far left is advocating by ommission for universal slavery.  Of course anyone who understands communisum already knows that.

    Posted by fclark on 2007 03 30 at 03:48 PM • permalink

  22. I think we could use Traceeeeeee‘s head as a substitute material for DU projecticles; her head is clearly the denser material. 

    The only challenge is actually mining and shaping her noggin; that might take a technological breakthrough to achieve.  But then her head would actually be useful for once.

    Posted by The_Real_JeffS on 2007 03 30 at 03:58 PM • permalink

  23. “Hell, just ban water in general to be safe.”

    Dihydrogen monoxide (or “water”) is the deadliest chemical on Earth.

    Posted by TallDave on 2007 03 30 at 04:17 PM • permalink

  24. http://www.dhmo.org/facts.html#DANGERS

    Posted by TallDave on 2007 03 30 at 04:18 PM • permalink

  25. Traceee is a regular on Jon Faine’s Conversation Hour (774AM).
    Other regulars are Michael Gurr, Marieke Hardy, Terry Lane and Jill Singer - detect a pattern? I digress.
    Tracee apparently is finishing a book and Jon, amazed at her diligence - what with her Saturday column and other commitments - asked how does she fit it all in? (so to speak).
    Well Traceee lets us all into her little secret. She sets aside Wednesday for thought. Wednesday, as she put it, is her “thinking day”.
    Isn’t that interesting?

    Posted by chrisgo on 2007 03 30 at 04:30 PM • permalink

  26. #16, andy, that was hilarious!!!

    Posted by Pogria on 2007 03 30 at 04:30 PM • permalink

  27. Wednesday, as she put it, is her “thinking day”.

    It shows.

    Posted by rick mcginnis on 2007 03 30 at 04:48 PM • permalink

  28. We should look into using Traceeeee’s brain-pan as a source of high-quality vacuum…

    Posted by mojo on 2007 03 30 at 04:53 PM • permalink

  29. She’s writing with depleted ink, for the throw weight.  There’s some danger to Leunig ducks, if they find and eat any off the ground.

    Posted by rhhardin on 2007 03 30 at 05:34 PM • permalink

  30. Graphite is probably OK for Traceeee because she hasn’t realised that it is pure fucking carbon, which, as we all know is the most deadly element known to man.

    Posted by Skeeter on 2007 03 30 at 05:36 PM • permalink

  31. Ban Computer chips, bombs have hardware, and oh my goodness, software.  Ban all software.

    Posted by David A on 2007 03 30 at 05:43 PM • permalink

  32. She’s a fool.

    Posted by Wimpy Canadian on 2007 03 30 at 05:52 PM • permalink

  33. Traceee is among that mob that brags about their ignorance with nary a blush, then demands to run everything.

    Posted by saltydog on 2007 03 30 at 05:54 PM • permalink

  34. Whilst not necessarily accepting that “wings” are a useful organising principle for political argument, this is easily my favourite G. Orwell quote:
    “What sickens me about left-wing people, especially the intellectuals, is their utter ignorance of the way things actually happen.”
    (Letter to Jack Commons, 1938 from “An Age Like This. Collected Essays” etc)

    Posted by ooh honey honey on 2007 03 30 at 05:54 PM • permalink

  35. That TNT metal also needs to stay in the ground, along with all the petroleum and dead people.

    Posted by Wimpy Canadian on 2007 03 30 at 05:55 PM • permalink

  36. Tracee’s cranium is stuck in the ground/up her butt ... [delete inapplicable]

    Posted by egg_ on 2007 03 30 at 05:57 PM • permalink

  37. #16
    Hear hear!

    Posted by egg_ on 2007 03 30 at 06:00 PM • permalink

  38. #8
    Tracee’s depleted cranium is denser than depleted uranium, impervious I’m afraid.

    Posted by egg_ on 2007 03 30 at 06:03 PM • permalink

  39. It’s clear from Traceee’s description of ANSTO as Australia’s top nuclear research and lobby group that she doesn’t know what they do.

    For example, there’s close to a 100 per cent chance that during her lifetime she will have a medical scan using materials produced by ANSTO.

    There is also a good chance that somewhere in her office is a radioactive silicon chip in a computer that was bombarded with neutrons at Lucas Heights - maybe the one in front of her. She probably doesn’t know that the structural soundness of the next aeroplane she boards or road she travels on was checked with a radioactive source produced at Lucas Heights.

    When she bites into a piece of fruit, she probably doesn’t know that it was protected from fruit fly by little soldiers that were irradiated at ANSTO so that they shoot blanks. She also probably doesn’t know that the smoke detector in her room contains a radioactive power source.

    All courtesy of an evil radioactive minerals including uranium.

    It is also apparent that Traceee didn’t manage to get past Caldicott’s front cover, so there may be hope for her yet.

    Better stop talking about what Traceee doesn’t know before it gets out of hand…

    Posted by Margos Maid on 2007 03 30 at 06:04 PM • permalink

  40. Ban Radon, I say.

    OH wait, you can’t

    Posted by El Cid on 2007 03 30 at 06:06 PM • permalink

  41. Further disturbing news from the World Health Organisation:

    On average, approximately 90 µg (micrograms) of uranium exists in the human body from normal intakes of water, food and air. About 66% is found in the skeleton, 16% in the liver, 8% in the kidneys and 10% in other tissues.

    Posted by Margos Maid on 2007 03 30 at 06:12 PM • permalink

  42. Tracee’s going against Geothermia’s chief industry ... better inform Tim Flummery pronto!

    Posted by egg_ on 2007 03 30 at 06:19 PM • permalink

  43. Traceee talks about the shadow of the Three Mile Island incident which killed and injured - nobody.

    By comparison, this is how the coal industry stacks up.

    Posted by Margos Maid on 2007 03 30 at 06:23 PM • permalink

  44. Three Mile Island also had fewer fatalities than the Somerset windmill disaster

    Posted by Margos Maid on 2007 03 30 at 06:28 PM • permalink

  45. O/T - Alan Ramsey attacks Rudd in his SMH column.

    Posted by Ian Deans on 2007 03 30 at 06:44 PM • permalink

  46. #26 & #37 Thank you, folks. Just wanted to show that the hamster running in its wheel that runs my brain isn’t quite dead yet. (But I don’t know what Traceee’s is up to. One kilometre per day, I would imagine.) P.S. Heh, egg_, depleted cranium.

    Posted by andycanuck on 2007 03 30 at 06:46 PM • permalink

  47. Ban Radon, I say.

    OH wait, you can’t

    In the Global Warming Swindle movie, a former Greenpeace official described how some in the organization wanted to target chlorine until somebody pointed out that chlorine is an element on the periodic table.

    Posted by ErnieG on 2007 03 30 at 06:50 PM • permalink

  48. Actually, some modern nuclear weapons do extensively use uranium.  A modern multistage nuclear device uses a plutonium primary to trigger the fusion secondary, sure.  But the excess neutrons from the fusion stage can then be used to trigger fast fission in a U-238 tertiary.

    Posted by Warmongering Lunatic on 2007 03 30 at 06:50 PM • permalink

  49. Three Mile Island also had fewer fatalities than the Somerset windmill disaster

    Or Ted Kennedy’s car.

    Posted by ErnieG on 2007 03 30 at 06:51 PM • permalink

  50. #44, 49:
    Reminds me of my favorite bumpersticker:

    More people died at Chappaquidic than atThree Mile Island

    Posted by brett_l on 2007 03 30 at 07:11 PM • permalink

  51. #21, fclark, What would PETA say?

    They would say that hamsters don’t run in wheels in nature and therefore the hamster should be killed.

    Posted by Janice on 2007 03 30 at 07:26 PM • permalink

  52. ...boy-men with warmongering tendencies…
    Why didn’t Traceee just go all the way?

    Posted by lotocoti on 2007 03 30 at 07:27 PM • permalink

  53. #45 Great link, Ian. It paints a picture of Kruddy more like the one we used to know — before his elevation to sainthood.

    Posted by Skeeter on 2007 03 30 at 07:29 PM • permalink

  54. I’ve discovered reeecently and sadly that there are many people who think marginally used reactor fuel and depleted uranium are the same thing.

    Posted by reese on 2007 03 30 at 08:16 PM • permalink

  55. I never cease to be amazed at the immaturity of her writings. She writes of that concert 24 years ago like a teenager writing about seeing her absolutely bestest pop singer. To have such a simplistic outlook on complex issues is a probably cute in a 14 year old but not in a middle-aged woman like Traceee.

    Things need to be pondered on from all angles. For instance, on this Earth Hour Day, we need to ask if the cost of organising and promoting the event expended more greenhouse gases than the stunt is likely to save. Electronic billboards, brochures, the environmental impact of green dyed SMH (can tell you it needed a brighter light to read), all those candles* and the carbon expended getting people to travel to their otherwise empty workplaces just to turn off the lights for an hour.

    * Candles are the most inefficient lighting imaginable - they are all heat and very little light. Their manufacture requires a lot of energy per lumen to melt and form the candlestick and more energy again to get them to physically get them to where they are going to be used. Lighting and letting them burn emits greenhouse gases directly into the atmosphere. Candles are great of a romantic and soft light but no substitute for a light bulb if you want to save the planet.

    Posted by Contrail on 2007 03 30 at 08:26 PM • permalink

  56. #

      Ban Radon, I say.

      OH wait, you can’t

    el cid—sure we can.  All you have to do is box it up in lots of concrete, and…

    oh.

    Posted by richard mcenroe on 2007 03 30 at 08:39 PM • permalink

  57. richard mcenroe

    I’ve seen the error of my ways. As ErnieG mentioned, it is now Ban Chlorine.

    oh wait, you still can’t…the damn fools.

    Posted by El Cid on 2007 03 30 at 08:48 PM • permalink

  58. “Remember that great rock concert we went to zillions of years ago when we were young and hopeful?”

    Translation: “Remember when we thought we were the center of the universe? Let’s keep on thinking that!”

    Posted by Andrea Harris, Administrator on 2007 03 30 at 08:57 PM • permalink

  59. The Edwardians made their A-Bombs from wicker and linen.

    Posted by Harry Bergeron on 2007 03 30 at 09:03 PM • permalink

  60. since we sang and danced our nuclear fears away

    She is a fucking Numbat, no doubt about it. The Age publishes this rubbish?

    Posted by Nic on 2007 03 30 at 09:22 PM • permalink

  61. Dippiest column since being smoked and hit on by a blackfella? That’s some claim, Tim. But it turns out you’re probably going easy on her.

    Luckily, this bint is as influential as a pig at a Hong Kong BBQ stall. The truth is that Australia will probably double its uranium sales for 07 year-on-year, and that growth in nuclear power will continue in the short to medium term. In my neck of the woods (greater China), nuclear power stations will pop up like mushrooms over the next decade. And not before time. I’m more than happy there’s a nuclear power station at Daya Bay (about 5km outside of Hong Kong’s territorial frontier with China and less than 60km as the crow flies from my apartment). In fact, I wish there were about ten reactors there, then I wouldn’t be choking in so much pollution resulting from the burning of high-sulphur coal.

    But why should Traceeee worry about people in China? She is after all just another self-centred middle class wanker who thinks the rest of the world is like inner-city Sydney. Let’s hear it for coal mining in China, you stupid bitch.

    BTW: I wonder if she’s got any Chinese in her…?

    Posted by Hanyu on 2007 03 30 at 09:46 PM • permalink

  62. #55 You’re missing the crucial point - candles are not made from fossil fuels.

    Posted by Observer on 2007 03 30 at 09:49 PM • permalink

  63. #62. Observer

    #55 You’re missing the crucial point - candles are not made from fossil fuels.

    Actually, unless you’re using an old fasiondd tallow wax (made from rendering animal fat) or really expensive bees wax, or possibly spermaceti which is made from the head oil of sperm whales….you’re probably using Paraffin wax.

    Paraffin wax, developed after chemists found a way to remove the naturally-occurring waxy substance from petroleum during refining, became the standard candle wax in the Western Hemisphere.

    Posted by fclark on 2007 03 30 at 10:06 PM • permalink

  64. egg_ wrote:

    #8
    Tracee’s depleted cranium is denser than depleted uranium, impervious I’m afraid.

    Neutronium is like that.

    Posted by Patrick Chester on 2007 03 30 at 10:07 PM • permalink

  65. #55, Great!! Doesn’t this mean all those hippy-dippy Gaia-loving New Agers gotta give up those godawful candles that seem to burn full time and smell like crap?  Or else admit to being complicit in the Rape of Mother Gaia?

    Posted by JorgXMcKie on 2007 03 30 at 10:09 PM • permalink

  66. #61, Hanyu,

    In fact, I wish there were about ten reactors there, then I wouldn’t be choking in so much pollution resulting from the burning of high-sulphur coal.

    But why should Traceeee worry about people in China? She is after all just another self-centred middle class wanker who thinks the rest of the world is like inner-city Sydney. Let’s hear it for coal mining in China, you stupid bitch.

    Ditto

    Posted by Nic on 2007 03 30 at 10:14 PM • permalink

  67. Wednesday, as she put it, is her “thinking day”.


    Clearly she reserves Tuesday as her “writing the column day”.

    Posted by Harry Buttle on 2007 03 30 at 10:28 PM • permalink

  68. A thought occurs: if promoting Earth Hour Day and suchlike events just cause more greenhouse gas emissions than a normal day would—poster printing, carbon from burning wood and candles, the greater demand for petroleum by-products in the form of paraffin wax (thanks, fclark)—then maybe Traceeeee and her fellow ilk will look at the figures, shriek, and demand yet more Earth Hour Days to combat the mysterious rise in carbon emissions. So they’ll hold more events, and emissions will continue to rise proportionally, which will give rise to yet more Earth Hour Days. Speaking of hamsters running in wheels . . .

    The way I see it, this could be more fun than feeding Michael Moore a tofu burger. *adopts carny barker voice* Which prominent leftist will clue in first? Which pandering columnist will prefer to implode rather than be proven wrong? All bets taken!

    Posted by Tungsten Monk on 2007 03 30 at 10:38 PM • permalink

  69. #45 ID
    Tks for the link.
    Would expect such from the lil’ skunk, akin to his threatening behaviour on-air to Kerry O’Brien, reminding him of his minister.
    Hope he gets crucified by the piranhas on his own side following an electoral loss.

    Posted by egg_ on 2007 03 30 at 11:09 PM • permalink

  70. Wait until we break out with the Marsium. 100% war use material. Resists all attempts at conversion to peacful usage.

    Posted by Grimmy on 2007 03 30 at 11:11 PM • permalink

  71. Lets see, if Wednesday is her ‘thinking’ day, how does she ever remember this each week? Maybe, each Wed night, she leaves a post-it note on her fridge, “Remember to think next Wednesday!”

    Now, if someone could grab the post-it note and throw it in the bin, we could avoid reading drivel like this in the future.

    Posted by dover_beach on 2007 03 30 at 11:18 PM • permalink

  72. As well as producing CO2 and sulphur dioxide, another aspect of coal-fired power stations is that they produce large quantities of fly ash (typically say, 200,000 tonnes per year), containing metals, such as arsenic, cadmium and mercury, organic carcinogens and mutagens as well as naturally-occurring radioactive substances - such as uranium.

    In other words, coal fired power stations spew out radioactive substances all over the joint, while nuclear reactors don’t - or certainly not in any where the same quantity.

    So anyone who is truly concerned about the radioactive boogeyman is better off living next to a nuclear reactor rather than a coal fired power station.

    However, living near a coal-fired power station is probably better than living near a wind farm, with the ever present risk of someone falling from one and killing themselves.

    Posted by Margos Maid on 2007 03 30 at 11:37 PM • permalink

  73. Wednesday, as she put it, is her “thinking day”.

    Okay, that takes care of 15 minutes (I’m feeling generous today :)) so, what does she do witht the rest of the day?

    Posted by Kami on 2007 03 30 at 11:39 PM • permalink

  74. Ruddtonium: highly unstable, prone to caustic reactions, true origin shrouded in mystery, speculation about which evokes controversy and abuse.

    Posted by egg_ on 2007 03 30 at 11:39 PM • permalink

  75. Margos Maid, you are on a roll today!  Excellent stuff.

    Posted by saltydog on 2007 03 31 at 12:07 AM • permalink

  76. I have recently heard rumors that a Dr. Frankenstien the Younger is working on producing a new mineral code named “Dreaded Third Switchium” that is so strong it will bring the dead to life so it can re-kill them later.

    Posted by Grimmy on 2007 03 31 at 01:36 AM • permalink

  77. Bad idea, Grimmy. All those suicide bombers back again. Last thing we want, mate. Nuke this thing now before Iran kidnaps the inventor.

    Posted by mareeS on 2007 03 31 at 02:00 AM • permalink

  78. Animal, vegetable or mineral?  I suppose Uranium Oxide is the mineral, which one is Tracee?

    Posted by Stevo on 2007 03 31 at 06:01 AM • permalink

  79. #65

    Great!! Doesn’t this mean all those hippy-dippy Gaia-loving New Agers gotta give up those godawful candles that seem to burn full time and smell like crap?  Or else admit to being complicit in the Rape of Mother Gaia?


    Hippy-dippy Gaia-loving New Agers are the rapists who defend their actions by saying “she wanted it”.

    Posted by Contrail on 2007 03 31 at 07:15 AM • permalink

  80. #78 She’s the very model of a modern, major screw up? BTW, I thought that Wednesday was the hamster’s day off? Oh. I guess it is.

    Posted by andycanuck on 2007 03 31 at 08:47 AM • permalink

  81. Lets see, if Wednesday is her ‘thinking’ day, how does she ever remember this each week? Maybe, each Wed night, she leaves a post-it note on her fridge, “Remember to think next Wednesday!”

    Now, if someone could grab the post-it note and throw it in the bin, we could avoid reading drivel like this in the future.

    Sadly, that would only work if any actual thinking went into her blather, which is clearly not the case.

    Posted by Achillea on 2007 03 31 at 01:09 PM • permalink

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