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<< DUAL SERVICE ~ MAIN ~ NEWS BRIEFLETS >>

HUMAN INFLUENCE THREATENS PLANET

Polar ice caps are melting ... on Mars:

The climate on Mars is showing a warming trend and recent images have shown the first evidence of seismic activity on Earth’s neighbor planet, scientists said today ...

[Michael Malin, principal investigator for the Mars Orbiter Camera] said images of Mars’ southern polar cap showed that scarps formed there are retreating at “a prodigious rate” of about 10 feet per Mars year.

Malin said scientists had no explanation yet as to why Mars might be warming.

I blame six-wheel-drive SUVs.

1. I blame George Bush.

   Posted by Nilknarf Arbed on 2005 09 21 at 09:14 AM • permalink



2. We need to vewy vewy careful, and be on the look out for a strange looking character with an Illudium PU-36 Explosive Space Modulator.

   Posted by The_Real_JeffS on 2005 09 21 at 09:36 AM • permalink



3. It’s ok, we’ve got our top rabbit on it.

   Posted by paco on 2005 09 21 at 09:51 AM • permalink



4. “about 10 feet per Mars year”

   Now, that just sounds neat, doesn’t it?

   Posted by MikeTheLibrarian on 2005 09 21 at 09:55 AM • permalink



5. Hmm… big yellow thing, kinda round, warmish…

   Posted by richard mcenroe on 2005 09 21 at 09:56 AM • permalink



6. Fluctuations in solar energy or failure to ratify Kyoto? Tough call.

   Posted by Latino on 2005 09 21 at 10:02 AM • permalink



7. I blame the emissions from all those Mars Rovers we shot up there.  I knew we should never has based them on Tim’s Wahoomaloo V-8…

   Posted by richard mcenroe on 2005 09 21 at 10:07 AM • permalink



8. We’ve so polluted the Earth with our SUVs and toaster ovens, that we’re leaking effluvia across space onto Mars.  If only Bushiburton would sign Kyoto, it would all be fixed.  Obviously.

   Posted by RebeccaH on 2005 09 21 at 10:14 AM • permalink



9. Climate Change on Mars!! Oh No. I vote we get Mumma Sheahan, Mikey Moore, Sean Penn and every other lefty moonbat we can find, and shoot then up there to check it out!!!

   Posted by TonyP on 2005 09 21 at 10:21 AM • permalink



10. Could we, you know, ...accidently… forget to give them helmets?

    Posted by MikeTheLibrarian on 2005 09 21 at 10:30 AM • permalink



11. Of course the polar icecaps are melting on Mars. Mars has not signed Kyoto.

    Posted by jorgen on 2005 09 21 at 11:04 AM • permalink



12. And the Mars warming started in January, 2001.  Probably on the 20th.  Around noon.

    Posted by wronwright on 2005 09 21 at 12:49 PM • permalink



13. Well, you know, intrepid investigative journalist Joe Conason had the scoop almost two years ago (viewing of pointless ad required for full article).

    Obviously Halliburton’s plans to drill for oil on Mars have already begun to have destructive effects on the environment there.

    Posted by PW on 2005 09 21 at 12:55 PM • permalink



14. No no no, you see, Mars is in sympathetic agony for her sister planet, Earth.  Either that, or the Martian environment knows that humans are going to get there eventually and wreck havoc and is starting to feel the effects ahead of time.  Either way, its our fault!

    Posted by MikeTheLibrarian on 2005 09 21 at 02:09 PM • permalink



15. I was actually going to post a serious comment, but I think all the nonsense above is better, and funnier.

    Posted by David A on 2005 09 21 at 02:20 PM • permalink



16. Ah-Ha!

    Global Warming Climate Change Galactic Warming.

    It’s not our fault, it’s George’s.

    Posted by kae on 2005 09 21 at 06:17 PM • permalink



17. So that’s why they invaded us.

    And here I was believing it was to stop Spielberg from making another movie.

    Posted by Jay Santos on 2005 09 21 at 07:43 PM • permalink



18. I wonder how many black helicopters with go fast side stripes it took to melt the ice caps on Mars?
    Pixy Misa could you please provide another calculation?

    Posted by Hank Reardon on 2005 09 21 at 09:43 PM • permalink



19. Well at least Galloway has not blamed <strike>the Jews</strike> the Neo-Cons for it yet.

    Posted by Andrew Ian Dodge on 2005 09 22 at 08:05 AM • permalink



20. I’m still waiting for him to explain how Mars is really dar-el-Islam and infidels are not welcome there…

    Posted by richard mcenroe on 2005 09 22 at 08:22 PM • permalink



21. It’s those robots fault. See, I told you solar power would kill us all! They aren’t Jewish robots are they? That bloody BUSH!

    Posted by Brian on 2005 09 22 at 10:13 PM • permalink



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