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GORE III TO FACE MUSIC

Albert Gore III’s bold attempt to avoid the shame of Live Earth - you try getting a Prius up to 100 mph; it ain’t easy - has been foiled:

Al Gore’s son was released from the Orange County Jail at 2 p.m. today, after a young man and woman posted his $20,000 bail in cash, sheriff’s spokesman Jim Amormino said.

He’d have gotten away with it, too, if it weren’t for those meddling kids.

UPDATE. Al 3 appears to have beaten his previous personal best ... which still keeps him in the timid zone relative to this site’s readers.

Posted by Tim B. on 07/05/2007 at 10:59 AM
  1. Your speed is limited only by the voltage, I’d think.  Try wiring the batteries in series.

    Posted by rhhardin on 2007 07 05 at 11:09 AM • permalink

  2. Algore III needs one of Tipper’s warning labels tattooed to his forehead it seems…

    or perhaps one that says “This space Available”

    Posted by quasimodo on 2007 07 05 at 11:12 AM • permalink

  3. Reports that the couple were Howard Dean’s burglar son and Chelsean Clinton not confirmed.

    Posted by richard mcenroe on 2007 07 05 at 11:15 AM • permalink

  4. Some people may speak ill of President Bush, but you can be sure that he saw just this sort of thing coming. Not only that, he stands ready to protect the blue-blooded sons and daughters of equal opportunity America.

    Boy Gore will never suffer a single day in the same prison as wanton misfits like “Scooter” Libby or Paris Hilton.

    Posted by splice on 2007 07 05 at 11:24 AM • permalink

  5. I blame Gorebal Warmering.

    Posted by El Cid on 2007 07 05 at 11:31 AM • permalink

  6. Gore is an associate publisher of Good, a magazine about philanthropy aimed at young people.

    Yep, a real role model, just like Dad.

    Posted by RebeccaH on 2007 07 05 at 11:35 AM • permalink

  7. Gore is an associate publisher of Good, a magazine about philanthropy aimed at young people.

    Yep, he’s a Democrat - publish a magazine about philanthropy targeted to the least-affluent demographic. Another brilliant business move by a clueless liberal.

    Posted by Dave S. on 2007 07 05 at 11:39 AM • permalink

  8. They paid out $20G in cash?  Man, that carbon indulgence credit scheme must be lucrative!

    Posted by The_Real_JeffS on 2007 07 05 at 11:44 AM • permalink

  9. Hey, with the shit he had in that Prius, is wasn’t the Prius that was doing 100 mph, GoreBoy was pushing the bastard.

    Posted by El Cid on 2007 07 05 at 11:45 AM • permalink

  10. is IT.

    Posted by El Cid on 2007 07 05 at 11:46 AM • permalink

  11. If I were Al the 3rd I’d get out of jail and start designing a car that runs on endangered animals.  “10 clubbed baby seals in the tank please.”

    Posted by Zonc on 2007 07 05 at 11:50 AM • permalink

  12. For pushing a Prius to triple-digit MPH, Little Gore wins one ticket to Live Earth.

    (Second prize: Two tickets to Live Earth….)

    Posted by SoberHT on 2007 07 05 at 11:51 AM • permalink

  13. Does Al Gore III also have the Gore Effect?

    Posted by Ash_ on 2007 07 05 at 11:56 AM • permalink

  14. Gore is an associate publisher of Good, a magazine about philanthropy aimed at young people.

    Young Gore publishes “Good Shit” a magazine about good shit.

    Hey, what mpg does a Prius get whilst doing the tonne ?

    Posted by Harry Bergeron on 2007 07 05 at 11:56 AM • permalink

  15. This brings to mind a few questions.

    How does anyone get anything to 100mph in that area of the I-5!!!!!?

    About where would the Gorebrat have to stick his foot in a Prissy to get to 100?  I’m guessing Monterey or maybe Santa Maria.

    Posted by yojimbo on 2007 07 05 at 11:57 AM • permalink

  16. That’s it.  This warmer the earth the faster the Prius can go.

    On the other hand, an early report had it as a Pious. I understand those go particularly fast for the self rightious and their spawn.

    Posted by David A on 2007 07 05 at 11:57 AM • permalink

  17. They also emit a cloud of smug (apologies to SP)

    Posted by mareeS on 2007 07 05 at 12:03 PM • permalink

  18. Ahh. A Prius, was it? So, what’s this “pot” thing?

    In my day, we had eight pots arranged in a 90° ‘V’ configuration, with valve lift directly operated by dual overhead camshafts per bank.

    Posted by splice on 2007 07 05 at 12:16 PM • permalink

  19. I met Gore III when he was a kid.  Before his accident he played on the same soccer as a neighbor’s kid, and I met him when I went to a game (it was post accident, so he was no longer playing but came by to say hello to everyone).

    I used to be involved in local politics and it is tough on the kids.  Their parents are never their own and many of them lash out to get attention.  One sad case was that the son of the former county executive committeed suicide—his dad was known as a politician who spent every waking hour meeting with citizen groups and probably had no time for his son.

    Posted by Room 237 on 2007 07 05 at 12:36 PM • permalink

  20. Little Gore was only in training!  This is the “good” Gaia-friendly version of NASCAR.

    Posted by Patricia on 2007 07 05 at 12:37 PM • permalink

  21. Ha!

    “In my day” if your camshaft was “overhead” you were in beaucoup deep yogurt.

    Posted by yojimbo on 2007 07 05 at 12:39 PM • permalink

  22. “Al Gore’s Kid” - just read that, poor sonovabitch never had a chance.  Driving fast on a bike is fun and easy, it’s freedom - driving fast in a Prius, how tedious and underwhelming.

    Posted by -keith in mtn. view on 2007 07 05 at 12:43 PM • permalink

  23. a young man and woman posted his $20,000 bail in cash

    I suppose they’ve learnt to do that in the brainwashing training sessions one receives during the cult initiations seminars that Gore is holding.

    Posted by PW on 2007 07 05 at 12:58 PM • permalink

  24. Hmmm. I once got a ‘70 Torino up to 130 on the Capital Beltway, but of course, that was a gas-guzzling 351 with dual 4-barrel carbs. I’m impressed that Young Al got a Prius up to 100. I wonder how many of the chipmunks survived.

    Posted by CraigC on 2007 07 05 at 01:05 PM • permalink

  25. Rush said that his sister, in addition to bailing him out, picked him up in a 400 hp Maserati V8. I wonder if it could be confirmed? I can’t find it on google news.

    Posted by moptop on 2007 07 05 at 01:38 PM • permalink

  26. Moptop

    I heard that on Rush also.  Have to think that it is some wire story from AP etc.  He normally doesn’t issue forth on something like that without benefit of printed copy.

    Posted by yojimbo on 2007 07 05 at 02:33 PM • permalink

  27. I don’t think he said that. I was only half-listening, but I think he was saying that it would be funny if she picked him up in a Maserati. And I think it was a Lamborghini.

    Posted by CraigC on 2007 07 05 at 03:41 PM • permalink

  28. I’ve never driven a car over 95.

    Of course, for two of them (the 91 Metro and the 76 Mercedes) that’s the absolute top speed, so I do what I can.

    Posted by Sigivald on 2007 07 05 at 04:03 PM • permalink

  29. I’ve broken 100 mph in a Ford Escort a long time ago.  So I’m willing to believe it can be done in a Prius.  But it’s probably a once-in-a-lifetime event. 

    Elizabeth
    Imperial Keeper

    Posted by Elizabeth Imperial Keeper on 2007 07 05 at 04:20 PM • permalink

  30. My FZ would only do 132 out on Highway 25 south of Hollister.  Took me a while to realize that I was just tail-gun Charlie cop-bait, while the others sped off into the distance.

    Posted by -keith in mtn. view on 2007 07 05 at 04:22 PM • permalink

  31. Re #19, that’s a sad tale all around, Room 237, but still useful insight.  Thanks for sharing it.

    Posted by The_Real_JeffS on 2007 07 05 at 04:49 PM • permalink

  32. My PB is 135 MPH… for almost ten minutes.  On a stretch of deserted desert road in New Mexico aboard a 1998 BMW K1200RS.  Yes, that’s a motorcycle.  The glint off of an oncoming car’s windshield finally spooked me.  It was just a rancher in a pickup, but the NMHP would not have been amused.  This particular road is so straight and flat you can see vanishing points in both directions. 

    Perfect place for felonious speeding.

    BTW: After ten minutes at 135 MPH, you feel like you could PUSH the bike faster than 55!

    Posted by Hucbald on 2007 07 05 at 05:25 PM • permalink

  33. I used to drive a ford escort, I don’t even think its terminal velocity when dropped from an airplane would reach 100 mph. That would require some kind of non boxy aerodynamics, after all. Now if you tell me that its speedometer said you were going 100 mph, that I would believe.

    Posted by moptop on 2007 07 05 at 06:51 PM • permalink

  34. I guess I have to take that comment back. I was referring to the p.o.s. US version of the Escort, which was so pathetic they retired the name here, as far as I can tell, anyways.

    Posted by moptop on 2007 07 05 at 07:01 PM • permalink

  35. You’ve gotta have some sympathy for the kid.With Big Al for your old man and being forced to drive a shit-box Prius anyone would surely seek permanent refuge in a chemically-altered state.

    Posted by Lew on 2007 07 05 at 08:46 PM • permalink

  36. Good, a magazine about philanthropy aimed at young people.

    I wondered what that was—I saw an issue in the Barnes and Noble this afternoon. I thought it was a music mag.

    Posted by Andrea Harris, Administrator on 2007 07 05 at 08:49 PM • permalink

  37. The shame of sharing the Goracle’s name is going to make this poor sod snap.  One day, he’ll show up at one of his old man’s overpriced PowerPoint presentations with a monster truck and flatten every last eco-friendly shitbox in the lot. 

    Hey, Al the 3rd!  You’ll want to name that thing “Big Carbon Footprint.”  It should get about 1.3 mpg, emit clouds of noxious fumes, feature genuine polar-bearskin seat covers, be twelve feet tall, and have a “Fuck Gaia” sticker in the back window, right over the gun rack.

    Posted by Blue State Sil on 2007 07 05 at 09:51 PM • permalink


  38. #6 Rebecca: Check out these consumer products advertised in Good magazine! I kinda like the lung ashtray.

    Posted by paco on 2007 07 05 at 10:44 PM • permalink

  39. #39: Oops! Forgot the link.

    Posted by paco on 2007 07 05 at 10:44 PM • permalink

  40. Well, as the owner of a Gaia raping V8 SS ute, I must admit that I might have accidentally, of course, exceeded speed limits on occasion.
    I wasn’t carrying drugs in the car though.
    But hey, if I was the GoreChillMonster’s kid, I would be taking whatever I could to not remind me of the fact.
    All that family time watching ‘An Inconvenient Fraud’ would push anyone, even someone driving a Pious, over the edge.

    Posted by 185600 on 2007 07 06 at 12:00 AM • permalink

  41. #33- Here’s a Ford Escort that’ll do 100mph in 3rd gear, and 0-60mph in 3 seconds.

    Posted by Habib on 2007 07 06 at 01:58 AM • permalink

  42. I once averaged over 100mph on a ~35 mile trip from Los Alamos, NM to Santa Fe, NM.  Big deal right?  It was in a ‘77 Toyota Corolla.  It was when the US had a national speed limit of 55mph.  Most telling of all, I did not pass a single car on the whole trip.

    I don’t think I could do it again without passing somebody.  People drive slower on NM freeways now that the speed limit is 75mph.

    Posted by Lewis on 2007 07 06 at 03:04 AM • permalink

  43. Sadly, the fastest I’ve ever gone was 220kms/hr.

    Posted by Ash_ on 2007 07 06 at 03:34 AM • permalink

  44. #43 Lewis

    I once averaged over 100mph on a ~35 mile trip from Los Alamos, NM to Santa Fe, NM.  Big deal right?  It was in a ‘77 Toyota Corolla.  It was when the US had a national speed limit of 55mph.  Most telling of all, I did not pass a single car on the whole trip.

    There’s a 90-mile stretch of California Highway 62 that runs east from 29 Palms to the Colorado River that is also that empty. A factory-stock 1993 Acura Integra GSR can reach 140 mph without the help of gravity.

    ;^)

    Posted by Spiny Norman on 2007 07 06 at 03:51 AM • permalink

  45. As the old saying goes, you can’t pick your parents. I think he’s holding up pretty well, all things considered. If Al Gore was my father, I’d shoot myself.
    Twice.
    Once in each knee.
    If I ever meet him, I will definitely buy him a beer.

    Posted by Texas Bob on 2007 07 06 at 05:33 AM • permalink

  46. I once got my 1985 Honda Civic CRX up into triple digits on a long straight stretch of US 40 (the old National Road).  She wasn’t really built for speed, but for handling.  Get her on a twisty back road with Tom Petty in the cassette deck, and there was nothing finer.

    Posted by Baby M on 2007 07 06 at 06:46 AM • permalink

  47. Got my Dad’s Buick Skylark to 120 mph on a stretch of interstate north of Cincinnati in 1972.  Suspensions and road surfaces being what they were back then, a six-pack of Pabst Blue Ribbon exploded in the trunk.

    God, that was fun.

    Posted by SSG Pooh on 2007 07 06 at 08:59 AM • permalink

  48. #33 No, it’s speedometer said 107, so I split the difference.  Ah, I liked that car, bought it in 1995 and it finally died in 2001 with 105,000 on it. 

    Elizabeth
    Imperial Keeper

    Posted by Elizabeth Imperial Keeper on 2007 07 06 at 09:16 AM • permalink

  49. Pabst Blue Ribbon Beer
    Hamms (from the land of sky blue water!)
    Lone Star
    Pearl
    Falstaff
    Texas Pride

    Ah, memories of misspent youth and cheap beer…

    Posted by Texas Bob on 2007 07 06 at 09:20 AM • permalink

  50. Apparently, the sister picked him up from the police station driving a fuel-efficient Maserati.

    Posted by andycanuck on 2007 07 06 at 11:03 AM • permalink

  51. #50

    Don’t forget Brew 102!  Right down there with Falstaff.

    Posted by yojimbo on 2007 07 06 at 12:42 PM • permalink

  52. Falstaff and PBR are nectarof the gods compared to P.O.C.: Pilsner On Call (alias “P*** Of Cleveland”).

    Posted by Baby M on 2007 07 06 at 01:17 PM • permalink

  53. #50 Texas Bob

    My first beer was a Hamms. I was 12, so I didn’t know any better.

    Posted by Spiny Norman on 2007 07 06 at 02:01 PM • permalink

  54. Oh, my Lord!  Are we talking about bad cheap beer now?  Try Mickey’s, in the wide-mouth jar.  I went out buy the cheapest beer I could find to bait bee and wasp traps, and wound up with this stuff. (Okay, so it’s actually malt liquor…)

    The connoisseurs at BeerAdvocate.com have this to say:
    overall: 3.3
    appearance: 3.5 | smell: 3 | taste: 3 | mouthfeel: 4 | drinkability: 4
    [...]

    “Big odor of sweet corn and hints of malt, pretty straightforward, but still a pretty decent scent for a malt liquor, not very appatizing but not terrible.”

    “Off taste of adjunct corn and rice upfront with a decent kick from the carbonation that spreads this flavor throughout the mouth. The carbonation spreads the taste off the beer evenly over the mouth but the flavor ain’t that great so poo. ...”

    “If you want the Cadillac of gas station malt liquor look no futher than Mickey’s.”

    Posted by Mary in LA on 2007 07 06 at 06:13 PM • permalink

  55. “... I went out TO buy…”

    Preview’s always *saying* it’s my friend, but I think it’s only interested in my text body.

    Posted by Mary in LA on 2007 07 06 at 07:13 PM • permalink

  56. He’s facing music?Little Nash Rambler.

    Posted by dean martin on 2007 07 07 at 03:35 AM • permalink

  57. One day, he’ll show up at one of his old man’s overpriced PowerPoint presentations with a monster truck and flatten every last eco-friendly shitbox in the lot.

    You won’t find many.  You can tell where Al is bloviating by the crowd of suburban chic SUV’s clogging the parking lot.

    Posted by richard mcenroe on 2007 07 07 at 10:56 PM • permalink

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