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FREE TRADE URGED

A fine idea from Andrew Bolt, now back on deck at the Herald Sun:

At the age of 50, say, or 45, a politician should be expected to finally know his—or her—best mind. Let them at that age have the right to go into an annual draft to join a more compatible team, as do footballers when they join another club.

And so the Liberals could trade the multiculturalist Petro Georgiou for Labor’s one-Australia Martin Ferguson. Labor could take soft Bruce Baird—please—in exchange for the pro-freedom hawk Michael Danby. And wouldn’t Malcolm Turnbull, so GQ modern, make Labor an excellent leader in the Hawke mode? Beazley, I’m sure, would make a nice swap, fitting in snugly as John Howard’s pro-war Minister for Defence.

Anywhere Beazley tries to fit—parliament, a limo, the QEII—is invariably snug. Maybe he’ll snuggify the launch of Bolt’s book later this month; two courses, Kim!

UPDATE. Not sure how many courses are planned at the launch, but Glenn Reynolds also has a book out shortly. Order now, or he will turn off the internet.

Posted by Tim B. on 02/02/2006 at 10:30 AM
  1. Order now, or he will turn off the internet.

    Two scary thoughts strike me about that statement:

    1.  Thousands of moonbats will believe it’s true.  (Their whining will raise the global temperature another 2 degrees, at least.)

    2. Glenn probably could.  (OK, that’s not so scary - Glenn’s a nice guy and I’m sure he’d turn it off only for the moonbats, not for us.  :-D )

    Posted by Barbara Skolaut on 2006 02 02 at 04:03 PM • permalink

  2. No no no no no no.

    I don’t know where this myth came from that Beazley was a good, or even decent, Defence Minister.

    Sure, there’s more than a little tongue-in-cheek there, but Mr. Bolt should stop scaring me.

    Posted by Cheesie on 2006 02 02 at 05:13 PM • permalink

  3. I’m with Cheesie on this one - Beazley back as Minister For Defence?? Mein Gott! How quickly we forget! I reckon that Bolta stayed out in the sun a bit too long on that one.
    On the other hand, the Ferguson & Danby trade would be a great deal - not that the Laborites would ever fall for taking Georgiou & Baird. They might be stupid but they’re not completely insane. Of course, the Dems or the Greens would take them like a shot, but they’ve got nothing to trade.
    As for Turnbull, it’s a bit hard to figure out where he’d do the most damage - although I guess Howard (and Costello) would prefer to have him out in front of them rather than behind them.

    Posted by Boss Hog on 2006 02 02 at 05:43 PM • permalink

  4. Fat Jokes?

    Come on Tim…

    Posted by Dan Lewis on 2006 02 02 at 08:08 PM • permalink

  5. #3 Boss. Spot on with Baird and the Dems.This root even sounds like the Liberal Rat,Chipp,who formed that sorry Party.No need for a swap,the Libs and the residents in the Cook electorate would benefit greatly by having him on the cross benches instead of in the Party room,in any case he would only be there until the next election.

    Posted by Lew on 2006 02 02 at 08:17 PM • permalink

  6. I have a better idea.  How about countries trade politicians?  Who will you give us in exchange for Ted Kennedy?

    Posted by RebeccaH on 2006 02 02 at 09:47 PM • permalink

  7. Bob Brown

    Posted by SteveGW on 2006 02 02 at 10:22 PM • permalink

  8. RebeccaH—In a pinch they can owe us, or agree to a designated minor leaguer to be named later.  Though how you get more minor league than Captain Oldsmobile is beyond me…

    Posted by richard mcenroe on 2006 02 02 at 10:26 PM • permalink

  9. Who will you give us in exchange for Ted Kennedy?

    The bigger question is how you’d get him over there. There’s not a human alive who would agree to travel over water with a Kennedy.

    Posted by Rob Crawford on 2006 02 02 at 10:47 PM • permalink

  10. Rob Crawford — FedEx — For two bucks extra, they’ll punch air holes.  Three bucks, and they’ll punch a couple drainage holes, too…

    Posted by richard mcenroe on 2006 02 03 at 01:10 AM • permalink

  11. For five bucks, I’ll put the holes in with an ice pick.

    Posted by CB on 2006 02 03 at 02:00 AM • permalink

  12. If ya take Bob Brown we’ll throw in Kerry Nettle as a bonus….

    Posted by crash on 2006 02 03 at 04:11 AM • permalink

  13. Andy “Pisstank” Bartlewheet as a sweetener.

    C’mon people, we can do a deal here.

    Posted by Pedro the Ignorant on 2006 02 03 at 11:35 AM • permalink

  14. In addition to my last comment I will say, Islam is a religion that lends itself to the abuse of all other religions.

    Islamic people come to the western countries including Australia, to escape poverty and war.

    However, they bring their ‘baggage’ with them. They do not recognize our culture or laws. They see nothing wrong in the suppression of women or others. 

    Sharia Religious Law still advocates the stoning of women for minor offences in relation to dress or sexual indiscretion.

    Saudi Arabia still decapitates offenders publicly every Friday night after prayers.
    These people are still in the middle ages.

    How can anyone show respect for their religion when it condones the murder of innocent men women and children; when some poor religious fanatic blows himself up in the belief that God will take him into paradise as a martyr.

    How dare these woe begotten people protest and burn western democratic embassies that have been funneling money into their corrupt governments for years, in support of the poor and hungry. These funds are rarely received.

    Criticism of our country appears to be their thanks to western countries for allowing them to emigrate, and to accept the kind of welfare they could only dream about in their own squalor: to come out in a mob to protest about our freedom of speech, and our right to publish what we want without censorship.  This is coming from some self appointed holy imam, who doesn’t want to learn the language of his host country.

    Historically, there have been few instances of charicatures and or cartoons which have not been too far off the mark. These are often indicative of the general feelings/trends within a society; we need these to be out in the open. I could go on. Well done Tim.

    Posted by JKonstant on 2006 02 06 at 04:30 PM • permalink

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