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The following email has been sent to all South Australian public servants:
Climate change presents a significant challenge to South Australia, and every South Australian needs to play a part in addressing this global problem.
• Warren McCann, Chief Executive of the Department of the Premier and Cabinet, invites you to a special free screening of “An Inconvenient Truth”.
• Date: Thursday 2 November 2006
Time: 12.00pm to 2.05pm
Venue: Nova Cinema, 251 Rundle Street, Adelaide• This is a free event open to all State Government employees.
• “South Australia’s focus on renewable energy has made the State a world leader in the battle against global warming.” Al Gore former US Vice President.
• Please note that seating is limited. Drinks and nibbles will be available for purchase from the cinema’s candy bar.
• Click here to view the flyer.
That’s one way of pulling a crowd. And in other environmental news:
"For more than 20 years we have exceeded the earth’s ability to support a consumptive lifestyle that is unsustainable and we cannot afford to continue down this path,” WWF Director-General James Leape said, launching the WWF’s 2006 Living Planet Report.
"If everyone around the world lived as those in America, we would need five planets to support us,” Leape, an American, said in Beijing.
How many planets would we need if everyone lived like celebrity environmentalists?
U.S. Sen. Dianne Feinstein delivered a lengthy, impassioned speech Wednesday about the need for this country, other nations and every individual to step up the fight against global warming.
Then she drove off in a gas-guzzling Lincoln Town Car.
Mr. Leape is welcome to live the life of a Zimbabwean peasant if he wishes, I certainly will not stop him from fulfilling his ideals.
This is bogus stuff, like tha Club of Rome concluding that we would run out of resources by 1980 or Paul Ehrlich that we were doomed to famines in the 70s. The only famines since he wrote his doomsday tome have been perpetrated deliberately by socialist thugs ruling their countries by force in order to kill their political enemies or implement insane political ideologies. Environmentalism is another such insane ideology, and it will kill millions if the fanatics ever come into the power they crave.
Posted by Michael Lonie on 2006 10 27 at 12:00 AM • permalinkWould it be inappropriate to say, “Thank you, FAG”?
Posted by SwinishCapitalist on 2006 10 27 at 12:06 AM • permalinkIt’s just the greens’ way of indulging in the oldest of human prejudices: “There’s just enough of me, but way too many of thee.”
Posted by The Sanity Inspector on 2006 10 27 at 12:23 AM • permalinkHow many planets would we need if everyone lived like celebrity environmentalists?
You clearly have no understanding of certain people’s need for private transport, Tim.
Posted by Kyda Sylvester on 2006 10 27 at 12:31 AM • permalinkAttention jetsetters - this is a good time to mention that reservations are still available for an environmental conference in Beijing next month.
For accommodation, choose between the Beijing Continental Grand Hotel with its indoor water park, 26 lane bowling and electronic simulated golf and billiards, and 24 restaurants and the Huiyuan apartments featuring international satellite television and matched leisure enjoyment.
Sit back and discuss the end of the world in air conditioned comfort.
Posted by Margos Maid on 2006 10 27 at 12:35 AM • permalinkBut are these international conferences really sustainable?
Posted by Margos Maid on 2006 10 27 at 12:43 AM • permalinkLook at this conference from margo’s link…
Dec 08 Global Symposium : Towards a New World Civilization, Lucknow India
I mean what on earth do these bunch of time wasting, work dodging w@nkers think they are on about???
And how much do u think the average Indian, who can barely scrape two rupees together, cares about what these bunch of inbred, tossers are going to be crapping on about over their chardonnays and canapes....
Unstated perk?: The 2+ hours you will need to see this film will be not be counted as flexitime off, but as work time.
My bet is that the Premier’s Office phoned Nova to ask how the film was pulling in the punters.
The very negative answer prompted some free Government assistance and organised propaganda.They should be made to read this and especially this Wall Street Journal article by Richard Lindzen debunking the film. Lindzen is a professor of climatology at MIT and a famous “climate change denialist”.
Posted by daddy dave on 2006 10 27 at 01:37 AM • permalinkAnd spokesman Scott Gerber noted that Feinstein drives a Lexus hybrid at home.
The Town Car?
“That was a rental,” he said
Blaming the company for her staff renting a “non-green” car? No wonder the Democrats can’t forumulate any sort of rational foreign policy; they are incoherent when it comes to domestic problems.
And if I were Feinstein, I’d can that spokesman for such a lame excuse. If he can’t lie decently on his feet, he’s no good as a Democrat.
Posted by The_Real_JeffS on 2006 10 27 at 01:38 AM • permalink"If everyone around the world lived as those in America, we would need five planets to support us,”
Yeah, and in one generation the birth rate would drop below replacement. It’s above replacement in the US only because of immigration from places where people live like these morons want us all to.
Yeah, but, however, on the other hand! There’s good news! If we all lived the envirovirtuous life of medieval peasants, the Green Revolution would shriek to a halt and the population would drop anyway. Not instantly, of course; not fast enough to save all the rain forests from slash-and-burn subsistence agriculture. But soon enough. And all the surviving quaint, picturesque peasants would have an infant mortality rate high enough to satisfy even the most smugly righteous environmentalist.
But there would be no environmentalists left to gloat, because there will be no comfortable affluent westerners with nothing better to do than fuck up other people’s lives.
Posted by P. Froward on 2006 10 27 at 01:43 AM • permalinkI would bet panda bear shit to tofu that blue states in America use more resources per capita than the red states.
And while we’re at it, the electorates in Oz with the highest green vote would top the list here too.
Nothing but a bunch of hypocritical, snivelling retards who preach from the pulpit and then ignore their own advice.
They are gonna kill more people than communism.
Five planets where people live like Americans. Now that galaxy would kick ass.
I’d settle for five countries. It’d let us reduce some consumption and start paying down our debt a little. If America didn’t consume what it does the third world would collapse from unemployment and Europe would be swallowed whole by refugees in a month.
If Europe really wanted to solve the poverty problem, they’d start consuming foreign made products at twice the current rate. American “over-consumption” feeds the world.
Posted by The Apologist on 2006 10 27 at 03:43 AM • permalink#20, Shit Yeah, I’ll drink to that!
#26, But Murph, they could look down upon us from their trees, and so feel enough smugness to keep them warm.
Posted by The_Wizard_of_WOZ on 2006 10 27 at 04:31 AM • permalinkOops, I mean cool, no wait then theres that ice age coming. Oh shit I’m confused now…
Posted by The_Wizard_of_WOZ on 2006 10 27 at 04:32 AM • permalinkMalthus would be so pleased at what he has spawned. How many times do people have to be wrong about doom and disaster before they finally get the message that things are pretty much never as bad as they think they’re going to be.
The disaster scenarios of Gore Inc have so many holes in them that it boggles the mind that people would be truly worried at what he is peddling.
"If everyone around the world lived as those in America, we would need five planets to support us,”
Hah! Suckers! While you pikers are sitting around pontificating, I was already out staking claim to my five planets. Now I’m sewing flags displaying the coat of arms for wronwright (a weasel cowering behind a shield - it goes back centuries and has a far far different meaning) and I’ll be staking my claims officially.
I just hope the Orions, Rigellians, and Alpha Centaurians know who their new overlord and protector is.
Posted by wronwright on 2006 10 27 at 05:59 AM • permalink"An Inconvenient Truth”
I take it that the flyer, is representative of the cover of al-Gors book. Love the Hurricane (OK Cyclone) emanating from the industrial chimney.
We in the States must have shut all of those industrials down, this year to give respite to our devastated land. Pity, as from above, they (hurricanes/cyclones) are so lovely in construction.
This year all we nasty non greenies have allowed, seems to be fire and heavy rain in areas (never the same areas, of course). The fires in our West are probably due to the fact that the REAL greenies have not allowed the clear cutting of trash and scrub that act as tinder, that are in the forest areas. Doing so, (clear cutting) would harm the forest areas, you know.
The heavy rains of course have been due to the Bush/Rove White House team, that your poor in need of respiration Sheiky wants to cleanse, praying and chanting for natural disasters (dressed in Wizard clothing) to a Magical Cube, housed in the Oval Office of the White House.
The real ‘Truth’ of the ‘Inconvenient’ kind, is that al-Gors has become a one note rabid dog.
#30:
Dear Mr. Wronwright:
Your intergallactic spacecraft is blocking my driveway; please move it. Also, kindly remember that garbage pick-up is every Monday and Friday and that it must be placed at the curb. Stoneware mead bottles are acceptable as recycle items, so there’s no need to leave them laying around the yard. I also note that you have a time machine up on blocks on the side of your house which is ruining the view of the dust geysers from my deck. And the mailbox with the little rooster-shaped weathervane on top of it is inconsistent with neighborhood notions of good taste.
We’re glad to welcome you to our world, Mr. Wronwright, but it is necessary that you adapt yourself to community standards. Please govern yourself accordingly.
Sincerely,
Bob Zork
President
Orion Hills Homeowners’ AssociationWhat a weird sentence.
This coming from a weird person, well, it’s hardly a surprise.......
Posted by The_Real_JeffS on 2006 10 27 at 10:05 AM • permalink#30:
Dear Mr. Wronwright:
The recent unfortunate downgrade of Pluto from the status of planet to asteroid is not an acceptable reason for cancellation of your one-year lease. Please bear in mind that your security deposit is forfeit if you do decide to cancel, and that you are technically liable for making monthly rent payments until we re-lease your pod. Govern yourself accordingly.
Sincerely,
Tomivar Smith,
Manager
Frozen Gas Lakes Apartments#30: Note left on front door
Listen, Bozo:
Your mammalian quadruped ("Spike", I think you call him) better stop urinating in my ornamental enzyme pond. We’ve got strict leash laws here at Alpha Centauri Estates, and one call from me to Lower-Life Form Control and fffzzzztttt! He’s history!
Your Fed-Up Neighbor
every individual is a euphemism for the little people. It doesn’t apply to Algore, Diane Feinstein, or the Puffington Host-tribe.
We need to live in little apartments and take public transport so they can live in enormous beach houses and jet around the world on private aircraft.
Posted by Bruce Rheinstein on 2006 10 27 at 11:16 AM • permalink"[W]e have exceeded the earth’s ability to support a consumptive lifestyle”?
No one wants to live like a consumptive. Breathing is already hard with the disease, and then you have all of that singing in garrets. You’re trying to do Puccini and the guy in the next garret is doing Webern and the soprano has eaten everything in the garret again (just look at her, dying of a wasting disease and she still weighs three bills). Before you know it, you’re so far gone you start singing to your coat. Then it’s just a matter of time before the duets finish you off. No thanks.
Posted by JDFlanagan on 2006 10 27 at 11:26 AM • permalinkDear Mr. Wronwright:
It is my unpleasant duty to inform you that your application for admission to the Heather O’ the Glen Country Club has been rejected. It was the unanimous decision of the Admissions Committee that the irregularities noted in your references - chiefly, the fact that “Karl” and “Rebecca” and “MentalFloss” do not appear in the Rigellian “Who’s Who”, or even in the Yellow Pages for that matter - constituted an insurmountable barrier to further consideration. You may be interested, however, in availing yourself of the Putt-Putt course located off of Hover Highway 95 on Three-Moon Street.
Sincerely,
Augustus Zulmo-Bork III
Chairman, Admissions Committee
Heather O’ the Glen Country Club
RigelliansburgMemo
To: Great and Illustrious Lord Rove
Subject: Amassing of Gardening Battle FleetDear Lord Rove,
It is unfortunate that I must bring to your attention that I have put off for far too long some badly needed pruning and tending of our intergalactic garden. In order to remedy this, I hereby request use of one (1) Romulan dreadnought class battle cruiser, equipped with the plasma cloud emitter, the one that turns indestructible metal into brittle styrofoam, in the process eliciting a girlie cry of surprise from stoic Vulcans.
I also request three (3) Klingon Birds of Prey, all equipped with full disruptor banks and anti-matter torpedos, to act as an escort.
The purpose of my request is to visit the planets of Rigel XII, Alpha Centauri, and Orion, and clean up the nasty comet belts that are plaguing those beautiful worlds. You may recall that the comet blasters hidden in the pyramids our predecessors placed there are somewhat difficult to access due to MarkL having misplaced the heiroglyph instruction book. MentalFloss is currently attempting to translate the access panels but I fully expect him to be zapped by a memory-erasing ray, just like geoff, rhhardin, and kae.
Please note that I may also need to do some minor terraforming of specific locations on the planets, including phasering in a brand new golf course.
Your approval is anticipated with a ready trigger ringer.
In Awe and Shock of Your Majestic Bearing,
wronwright
henchman, 1st classPosted by wronwright on 2006 10 27 at 12:35 PM • permalinkThats comedy gold Wronwright.
Btw how long were you a 2nd class henchman? I’ve recently been promoted from 3rd class and I’m wondering how long I have to wait before I can use the nice bathrooms…
Posted by The_Wizard_of_WOZ on 2006 10 27 at 02:10 PM • permalinkWell, let’s put it this way. When I made 3rd class, the Knights Templar put me through the ceremony in Antioch. That was just after we dug into the Holy of Holies and we found, well, you know.
When I reached 2nd class, I had to return to Rome for that ceremony, placing the trial of Galileo on pause. Hey, these things happen.
So, yes, it takes a while. But it worth it, I think.
Posted by wronwright on 2006 10 27 at 03:07 PM • permalinkBy the way ...
SgtMom, I need that Klingon Bird of Prey back. Pronto!
(Avail myself of the Putt-Putt course, eh? We’ll see who goes putt putting.)
Posted by wronwright on 2006 10 27 at 03:10 PM • permalinkClimate change presents a significant challenge to South Australia, and every South Australian needs to play a part in addressing this global problem.
It’s called ‘summer’ ya great pillock. Deal with it.
Posted by richard mcenroe on 2006 10 27 at 08:20 PM • permalink"Then she drove off in a gas-guzzling Lincoln Town Car.
Any way she leaves is a good way.
Posted by Dave Surls on 2006 10 28 at 03:53 PM • permalinkThe SA Govt’s evangelistic promotion of the Gore film comes close to promoting a religion with government money.
IF the overwhelming majority of scientists already accept this as a real danger, WHY does the government act as if its employees need special counselling on it?I expect the Premier will next arrange for a film condemning Intelligent Design as a threat to the world of science. [Which The ABC Science Report already thinks it is!]
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There is a web site out there where you plug in how you live and they respond with how much land/resources it takes to support you.
The interesting thing is that to meet your proper ratio of land to personhood, you must live in a longhouse (like Amazon natives) with a hundred others with no water or electricity.
Found it. This is silly...I have a small home, just my wife and I, work is close, diabetes limits my “bad” food intake....
And if everyone lived like me we would need four planets.
However, if I live with a minimum of 7 people, don’t drive-fly-work, only eat what I grow, never eat meat, and don’t have electricity or water....
I can live on one planet.
I call bullshit!