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EMOTICONS MAKE ALLAH :(
Thinking of getting all crazy with the emoticons? Well, you better watch yourself, buster:
The use of emotional signs, for example, smile, sad, etc. in a cellphone falls in the category of animate pictures.
It is prohibited to make use of such emotional signs in a cellphone.
Can we use the Prophet (pbuh) with a bomb in his turban instead? ~€{:-<)>
Posted by Paul Zrimsek on 2007 02 08 at 11:45 AM • permalink#4 I think you have found yopur true calling as an emoticon designer (emoticon-artist?)
Posted by tabitharuth on 2007 02 08 at 11:49 AM • permalinkDo not create emoticons on your cellphone, for they are forbidden. Nor shall you doodle during boring office meetings, or work on the child’s placemat at affordable, family-style restaurants. They are an abomination. Nor copy the picture of the pirate so that you can get into the mailorder art school. O believer! Do you not know that paper and pencil were created by Allah to design explosive devices with? You profane him when you sketch out that chemical compound that might cure cancer. And that is why it is more blessed to be ignorant nitwits.
and Allah Ta’ala Knows Best
Hush yo’ moth, er, mouth. Moth, mouth, moth. Which is it?
Oh, bugger it.
Posted by Harry Eagar on 2007 02 08 at 12:44 PM • permalink#14
When his imam found out
he had texted an umlaut
he demanded an investigation
it was against the law
it was against the law
he reached for his saw
to enforce the lawarkin looks round
and spits on the ground
ev’ry time a soldier’s mentioned
an’ john edwards says ‘oy’
i didn’t get no joy
in my bid for blogger attention
allah say no
the imam likes to tell us
allah say no
he telling us time and time again
goodbye cat meat, say hello to your burqa
Sharia be the rule, obey the fatwa
Sharia be the rule, obey the fatwaPosted by Mr. Bingley on 2007 02 08 at 01:04 PM • permalink[blush]
We can but hope to be accepted into the Poets-Artists-Cartoonist-Organization, master.
Posted by Mr. Bingley on 2007 02 08 at 01:37 PM • permalinkWell, it won’t be funny now since I’ve already given away the punchline, but anyway…Marx Brothers joke, I think:
Outside of a dog, a book is a man’s best friend. Inside of a dog, it’s too dark to read.
The best-knowing Allah Ta’ala’s exhortation made me think of Muslims literally trying to make “emotional signs” in a cellphone.
How many LAUGHs did I just eradicate?
(BTW, I expect some credit for using “literally” correctly, now.)
On a marginally-related note:
Hamas and Fatah declare a truce.
The betting pool for how long this one will last is now open. Please submit your wagers in increments of nanoseconds.
yes, and let’s not forget the broader context
The only Islamic preaching I’ve EVER agreed with.
This does, however, make it more difficult to sell my anti-emoticon hate: it was based on the notion that it was an Islamist plot.
Posted by mencken_cynic on 2007 02 08 at 05:38 PM • permalink#31, the rule is a prohibition against making graven images that could be worshipped in place of God. Hairsplitters in Islam, of course, take it to its illogical conclusion by prohibiting any reproduction of man or animal, which would preclude photography, painting, sculpting, or making emoticons on your cellphone. The majority of Muslims probably don’t take it seriously, since as someone here pointed out, the Big Guys like having their pictures plastered everywhere.
sim:
I think the background is—
—as it was with the Mo-toons, the Minneapolis taxi drivers who wouldn’t carry passengers with alcohol, the porcine statuary which had to be removed, the creation of a ‘Palestinian’ dealth-cult society, and all the other ginned up faux-grievances and pathologies—
—whatever these ‘leaders’ think they can get away with inflicting on their own people and whatever credulous, self-flagellating Westerners will buy.
Trouble is, too few people in a position to do so are calling ‘bullshit’ on all of this for the obvious shakedown it is.
But what if a djinn sends you an emoticon that will protect you from having your penis stolen via cell phone? I bet the imam didn’t think that one all the way through.
#31 I believe its basis is supposed to be that depicting the human form in Islam is akin to idolatry, sim, which is why their past art was mainly geometric patterns and concentrated on architecture but, as Charles at LGF showed during the Prophet Mo cartoons controversy, there are examples of human representative art from historical Islamic sources even depicting Mo himself.
Posted by andycanuck on 2007 02 08 at 05:48 PM • permalink#32 Let’s hope peace breaks out in the PA more often , paco. (Maybe we should found the PA Charity Organisation to encourage such a peace movement?)
And obviously I was too late in replying to sim’s query.
8=^(
Too slow! Too slow!Posted by andycanuck on 2007 02 08 at 05:51 PM • permalinkIs it just me or did anyone else piss themselves laughing at the title of this post
Maybe I’m just easily amusedPosted by Rachel Corrie's Flatmate on 2007 02 08 at 06:44 PM • permalink#7512 Q. At work to get holidays i have to lie sometimes. I want a holiday and i know they will say No so can i lie to get my holidays? Jazakullah Mufti saab, for answering mine and everone`s question and may Allah Accept your time and Grant you more Knowledge. Ameen
A. It is not permissible to speak a lie to get leave from work.
You know what is a valid excuse to the company to obtain a leave. You may create a factual situation and then request for leave based on truth.
and Allah Ta’ala Knows Best
Mufti Ebrahim Desai
I’m not even going to bother commenting on that one.Posted by Nilknarf Arbed on 2007 02 08 at 07:35 PM • permalinkAre they allowed to have personalised ringtones?
How about the sound of a burbling big-block Chevrolet 427?
Is that allowed?
#2 They’re Shiites (yes! spelled it right!) Strong Persian influence there and pictures of people ain’t so un-holy for them.
I just wish the Persians would throw of the yoke of Arab imperialism they have suffered under for a 1000 years.
The “Iranian” New Year is coming shortly. The muslim cunts hate this celebration of Persian culture.
Posted by Wimpy Canadian on 2007 02 08 at 08:44 PM • permalink#42 Secretly named Arbed,
This logic is identical to the logic they use to get around the “no interest” money lending policy.
How does it go? I will buy this thing that you want (house for example) for this sum. Here is the money. Now I will rent it back to you for, say, 30 years, at this amount. After 30 years, I will graciously give you this house as a mark of my esteem for you.
Posted by Wimpy Canadian on 2007 02 08 at 08:52 PM • permalinkIs “Allah” Arabic for “Nuggan?”
Ask walterplinge, he’ll explain…
Posted by richard mcenroe on 2007 02 08 at 10:00 PM • permalink#52 Good one, Narnian1. Surely, a certain top three finisher in any eMOticon contest. (Although maybe Vs would work better for width for the sideburns leading into the WWW beard.)
Posted by andycanuck on 2007 02 09 at 12:22 AM • permalink#42 habib (no not our habib): jamila, we need that holiday but the bastards won’t give me time off. i’m going to say i’m sick
jamila: you know that is not permissible
habib: so what am i going to do?
jamila: well, you have to create a factual situation that will let you stay away from work
habib: ........ !bing! (sound of faulty cluebat bought online from paco enterprises)
jamila, pass me that baseball bat - no - on second thoughts you hang onto it - hit me on the kneecap
jamila: ai ai ai habib, that’s a bit over the top
habib: just do it woman - you know i am your lord & master & you must obey me
jamila: ok then (sickening crunch)
habib: ooooooowwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww
jamila: ummm is this the best time to mention i got cheap flights to gstaad? guess you won’t need to pack skisAnd we used to snicker at primitives who thought getting their pictures taken would steal their soul.
You mean there’s no PACO product that can do this?
You mean the Prototype Asmomatous Construct Obliviator? I’ve been beta-testing that. Let me tell you, an army of soulless zombie slaves sounds good on paper, but they’re starting to seriously creep me out.
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And we are supposed to take this religion seriously?