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DRIVE A SHAM

Look out, Anadol! Syria and Iran have teamed up to build a new car:

Marketing of the car — under the name “Sham,” the old Arabic word for Syria — will start in April, said plant manager Ziad Kattini.

That name may hinder export sales. Feel free to suggest alternatives.

Posted by Tim B. on 03/11/2007 at 12:04 PM

  1. Does it come pre-loaded with Semtex?

    Posted by Spiny Norman on 2007 03 11 at 12:11 PM • permalink

  2. How’s about “Shrapnel” since its bound to become some, what with semtex holders as standard equipment.

    Posted by Vanguard of the Commentariat on 2007 03 11 at 12:12 PM • permalink

  3. Great minds think alike Spiny!

    Posted by Vanguard of the Commentariat on 2007 03 11 at 12:14 PM • permalink

  4. How about “Ka-BLAM!”

    Posted by Andrea Harris, Administrator on 2007 03 11 at 12:14 PM • permalink

  5. Supernova.

    Posted by Andjam on 2007 03 11 at 12:17 PM • permalink

  6. Hmmmm.

    How about: “Four Wheels of utter Crapitude!”?

    Posted by memomachine on 2007 03 11 at 12:22 PM • permalink

  7. How about the Blammo?

    Of course, if it is anything like the Yugo, “Sham” may be quite appropriate.

    Posted by Spiny Norman on 2007 03 11 at 12:28 PM • permalink

  8. The Boomer, peace be upon it, with camel hide upholstery and extra trunk room for the RPG.

    Posted by RebeccaH on 2007 03 11 at 12:28 PM • permalink

  9. “Come test-drive the new Ordnance - it’s a real blast!”

    Posted by Blue State Sil on 2007 03 11 at 12:32 PM • permalink

  10. Introducing the IED (Innovative Explosive Design).

    Posted by Kyda Sylvester on 2007 03 11 at 12:51 PM • permalink

  11. I think I’ll invest in the Sham. Look there are billions and billions of potential customers, in the Arab world, Europe and elsewhere. I believe, based on not seeing the car, that the Sham will have a positive impact on the environment, lead to global cooling, and the stabilization of the Martian orbit. I know this, because I believe.

    Phred.
    President
    Vaporware Investments, LLC

    Posted by phred on 2007 03 11 at 01:09 PM • permalink

  12. How about Carswarm™?

    Posted by ErnieG on 2007 03 11 at 01:16 PM • permalink

  13. As long as it’s Kyoto-exempt, and can be impoorted without a catalytic converter, I think we right-wing-deathbeasts may be obliged to buy the damn things…

    Posted by richard mcenroe on 2007 03 11 at 01:22 PM • permalink

  14. It takes a licking and keeps on ticking.

    Posted by rhhardin on 2007 03 11 at 01:34 PM • permalink

  15. Well, over here General Motors named a truck “Sonoma”. Maybe they should have a car-Sonoma.

    Don’t you just hate stupid puns? So do I…

    Posted by Billy Hollis on 2007 03 11 at 01:35 PM • permalink

  16. Instead of a “mileage warrantee”, does the amazing Sham have a “blast radius warrantee” or just Planned Autoincendiary Calamitous Obsolescence?

    Posted by Spiny Norman on 2007 03 11 at 01:45 PM • permalink

  17. A Jihad Rod.

    Posted by Carl H on 2007 03 11 at 02:13 PM • permalink

  18. How about the Schmuck?

    Posted by Mystery Meat on 2007 03 11 at 02:14 PM • permalink

  19. Sham.  It’s like Shazam but without power or courage…..

    Posted by Apostic on 2007 03 11 at 02:32 PM • permalink

  20. The One-way?

    The Sham Pharoah?

    The Splodey?


    The first time I see a bearded swarthster driving down the street in a Sham with the license plate “RAZNB8”, I’m hitting the dirt.

    Posted by Dave S. on 2007 03 11 at 03:07 PM • permalink

  21. Best not call it the Goat, or we’ll see an epidemic of tailpipe-burned dicks.

    Posted by Dave S. on 2007 03 11 at 03:09 PM • permalink

  22. 20. The Sham Pharoah?

    Gee, how did we forget Wooly Bully?

    Posted by Apostic on 2007 03 11 at 03:25 PM • permalink

  23. Damn it, #21 Dave!  You owe me a new monitor and keyboard.

    Posted by Barbara Skolaut on 2007 03 11 at 04:15 PM • permalink

  24. The ‘Jihad-mobile’

    Posted by Blink on 2007 03 11 at 04:21 PM • permalink

  25. Wonder what “Sham” stands for—Sexy Hotrods Ain’t Muslim?  Some Have Atomic Motors?

    Posted by Clubbeaux on 2007 03 11 at 04:29 PM • permalink

  26. Damn! That car might seriously eat into the export sales of the Lada Niva.

    Posted by Behemoth on 2007 03 11 at 04:42 PM • permalink

  27. The “Piece of Shit”

    Thats truth in advertising.

    Posted by alien kiwi on 2007 03 11 at 04:50 PM • permalink

  28. #21 Dave, I laughed so much my wife came in from the other room to see what the hell was going on.

    Posted by alien kiwi on 2007 03 11 at 04:52 PM • permalink

  29. Is Daihatsu involved? They had something called the Charade a while back.

    Posted by dean martin on 2007 03 11 at 04:58 PM • permalink

  30. The Durka Durka.

    Posted by fidens on 2007 03 11 at 05:42 PM • permalink

  31. How ‘bout the inshalla
    God willing, you’ll reach your destination.

    Posted by Mike_W on 2007 03 11 at 06:05 PM • permalink

  32. M1A2 Target.

    Posted by David A on 2007 03 11 at 06:16 PM • permalink

  33. And you thought the Yugo sucked.

    If they abandon this car idea when I give them six bucks, carbon offset!

    Posted by David A on 2007 03 11 at 06:19 PM • permalink

  34. They both have such a great track record in manufacturing, what could possibly go wrong?  So where do you go for spare parts when the factory just disappeared in cloud of smoke and flames?

    Posted by jeff mccabe on 2007 03 11 at 06:27 PM • permalink

  35. Don’t rubbish Daihatsus, I had two and the first was a goodun (the second I won’t talk about). My friend christened the first the ‘Facade’.

    Q1.  Why do Lada’s have rear windscreen wipers?

    A1.  So you can see who is pushing you.

    Q2.  Why do Lada’s have rear windscreen demisters?

    Q2.  So that when you are pushing them your hands don’t freeze.

    Posted by kae on 2007 03 11 at 06:38 PM • permalink

  36. The Islamborghini
    The Gelignite Rider
    The Mooziemobile
    The bin Lada
    The Sheikrattlenroll

    Posted by you bet on 2007 03 11 at 07:02 PM • permalink

  37. Mercedinajad.
    Asaab.
    Baathon.
    Ford Fahjer.
    Scada.
    GM (General Mujahadin).
    Imam v12.

    Posted by danS on 2007 03 11 at 07:03 PM • permalink

  38. JLR Zapatero.

    Posted by danS on 2007 03 11 at 07:13 PM • permalink

  39. They should strike up a deal with Ford for the US market, and badge-engineer the same car under 3 brand names:
    - Ford Great Satan
    - Mercury Infidel Dog
      and
    - Lincoln LDK

    Posted by Shaky Barnes on 2007 03 11 at 07:16 PM • permalink

  40. How about the “Hudna”?  It won’t start until you’re looking away from it.

    Posted by Craig Mc on 2007 03 11 at 07:28 PM • permalink

  41. Infidel Squisher
    For the Iraqis: Mahdi Jihadi

    An when you buy one your are told to just ignore the Plastique and Cell Phone. They are part of the the advanced diagnostics.

    Posted by David A on 2007 03 11 at 07:30 PM • permalink

  42. How do you double the value of your Yugo?

    Fill it with gas.

    Posted by Vanguard of the Commentariat on 2007 03 11 at 07:42 PM • permalink

  43. Will the detonate button be mounted on the steering wheel in the standard model?

    Posted by Dan Lewis on 2007 03 11 at 07:48 PM • permalink

  44. They are going to save money by not mounting rearview mirrors.  Once you start going there is no going back.

    Posted by David A on 2007 03 11 at 07:53 PM • permalink

  45. I like Sham better than Touareg.

    I keep wanting to spell that backward to see if the Germans are pulling a funny.

    Posted by Rittenhouse on 2007 03 11 at 08:52 PM • permalink

  46. In my house, Sham is a synonym for Pillow Case.

    Posted by triticale on 2007 03 11 at 09:07 PM • permalink

  47. Judging by the reliability of existing Iranian cars, maybe they should call it the Immolator?

    Posted by Nicholas on 2007 03 11 at 09:14 PM • permalink

  48. does it come with a free Sham-ee for ablutions?

    just as well they didn’t call it the Shah-Lom, a bit hard to market through a withering hail of gunfire.

    Posted by Habib on 2007 03 11 at 09:15 PM • permalink

  49. Sham.

    Obviously driven by a Fakir.

    Posted by kae on 2007 03 11 at 09:22 PM • permalink

  50. Sham - The Arabian DeLorean

    Now with optional roof rack for your child brides.

    Posted by Infidel Tiger on 2007 03 11 at 09:38 PM • permalink

  51. Assad called the project a testament of their “historic” cooperation.

    “Our political relations are rooted, old and excellent,” he said.

    As an Australian I find that sentence rather contradictory.

    Posted by Infidel Tiger on 2007 03 11 at 09:42 PM • permalink

  52. A Sham is just a licence-built Toyota Prius. The Iranians and Syrians have severe “truth-in-advertising” laws.

    Posted by Contrail on 2007 03 11 at 11:50 PM • permalink

  53. The Sham, Syria and Irans new contribution to motoring excellence!  You’ll find plenty of space for smuggling explosives, rocket propelled grenades and other supplies for Hezbollah, and a trunk large enough to stuff any recently kidnapped jew. 

    The handling is a dream, featuring sporty suspension (ie, none) and power of Allah steering as standard.  Its bullet magnet status will be sure to attract many smart young muslim men wishing to impress their 72 virgins on arrival in paradise - the stock plastic explosive can even be upgraded to a dirty bomb in our signature “mad mullah” export series.

    Upgrade features include GPS with IDF, Coalition and IED waypoints preset, and bullet proof glass that will ensure you survive long enough to trigger the explosives in close enough range to kill all the Americans at that checkpoint.  Killing infidels simply doesn’t get any easier or more prestigous than this!

    Posted by bondo on 2007 03 12 at 12:00 AM • permalink

  54. Jihadmobile

    Posted by Bonmot on 2007 03 12 at 12:10 AM • permalink

  55. Sham BAM!!! Thank you Ma’am.

    Me wonders if the Homophobes will like it.

    Four on the floor, and fats all round.

    Posted by deadparrot on 2007 03 12 at 12:12 AM • permalink

  56. Bumper sticker seen on a Sham: My deathbot’s an honour student at Achmed’s Madrassa

    Posted by Infidel Tiger on 2007 03 12 at 12:26 AM • permalink

  57. The Aisha - after nine years it’s fucked.

    Posted by flying pigs over mecca on 2007 03 12 at 12:42 AM • permalink

  58. How about the Sharia. Has a nice ring to it? Doesn’t it?

    Pretty popular in London I hear.

    Posted by Penguin on 2007 03 12 at 02:02 AM • permalink

  59. Aparently they’re releasing a 4x4 called The Jew. It’s very good under trying conditions in the desert. Not bad at water crossings and has excellent fuel economy of about 40 years, before it needs to stop.

    Should wholesale for about $45k. No retail available.

    Posted by Infidel Tiger on 2007 03 12 at 02:10 AM • permalink

  60. Will there be a warranty, or will mechanical failures and design faults be the will of Allah?

    What id your Shammy gets a shimmy?

    Posted by Habib on 2007 03 12 at 02:43 AM • permalink

  61. I wonder if a red cross painted on the roof is an option for Hezbollah buyers.

    Posted by Spag_oz on 2007 03 12 at 06:07 AM • permalink

  62. You have to be really careful about car names. To some, the Daihatsu Applause might be a load of clap.

    Posted by blogstrop on 2007 03 12 at 06:56 AM • permalink

  63. The Shamel: with dromedary seat coverings, four-on-the-floor and a single transmission hump ...

    Posted by egg_ on 2007 03 12 at 07:55 AM • permalink

  64. I hear they come standard with driver and passenger side airbags.
    Technical Data: Voice recognition ignition using the term “Allah Akbar” will ignite the 8 kilograms of C4 to deploy the airbag.

    Posted by Hank Reardon on 2007 03 12 at 11:11 PM • permalink

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