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DELIGHT

Christopher Hitchens is interviewed by the ABC’s Ros Childs on the 2x500 pounding of Abu al-Zarqawi:

CHILDS: So will his death, therefore, in a way raise his profile in the country amongst the insurgents as he is being hailed as a martyr?

HITCHENS: No, I don’t think—well, obviously there will be a bit of that but these people also have to watch Iraqi TV and they can see that the majority of people in the country are very delighted at the man’s death. So I don’t think that does cut both ways.

From Powerline, one of many images of Iraqi delight not widely published following Zarqawi’s smooshing:
image
Now, back to the interview:

CHILDS: So what is going to happen now? What is the next move as far as al-Zarqawi’s supporters is likely to be?

HITCHENS: Well, I hope that we emulate the advice of the ... emulate? Follow the advice of the new Iraqi PM in his speech yesterday, who said it strengthens our determination to kill them all.

Yes.

(Via J.F. Beck, who also notices a flaw in the anti-automated warfare argument of Professor Stephen Graham.)

UPDATE. Zarqawi lives! Well, in the afterlife: “Howzit swingin’, fagsicles? Yeah, I know all you bitzoches all seen the pictures by now. Go on and laugh it up chump, like your drivers license photo is all George fuckin’ Clooney. Personally I think I’m lookin’ straight GQ, seeing as I just got a 500-pound laser guided curb stomp. Shit cuz, y’all should see Kahlid, a.k.a. ‘Ceiling Spackle.’ But, hey, whateva. You kuffar haters can finally step off my nuts, ‘cause I. am. outtahere. Y’all can just suck it, ‘cause Zarkman got his free pass to Allah’s celestial Disneyland.”

Sadly for Zarkman, that Disneyland quickly turns into a Never-want-to-go-there-land. Read tragic Zark’s full report.

Posted by Tim B. on 06/09/2006 at 11:20 AM
  1. Hah! That Iowahawk piece is bloody magnificent! Is there a Nobel prize for comedy? If not, we damn well need one.

    Posted by James Waterton on 2006 06 09 at 12:27 PM • permalink

  2. That’s not a peace sign that guy is flashing.

    Thank goodness, for once.

    Posted by Brian Tiemann on 2006 06 09 at 12:46 PM • permalink

  3. Professor Stephen Graham is an idiot. Notice how the left now has it’s own little parallel universe with it’s own history? American forces have been ‘relentlessly humiliated’ by the insurgency, despite slaughtering them whenever they fight, smashing the entrenched defenses of Falluja in just three days for example. And notice that the ‘fact’ that Iraq is ‘a disaster’ is just a given in professor Graham world, he apparently has no understanding of the concept that a conflict can be ongoing and a final analysis of it’s results can only be made after it’s conclusion. A constitution written, two successful votes, the appointment of an elected government, free press, the ongoing formation of the Iraqi army, a colossal pile of dead jihadis and baathist scumbags, none of this counts as progress.

    No, in professor shit-for-brains land, all is lost. And now he’s scared the robots will come and get him.  Settle down, grandpa.

    Posted by Amos on 2006 06 09 at 12:59 PM • permalink

  4. Abu al-Zarqawi! Abu al-Zarqawi! Oh there your are. Hello. Welcome to Hell. Here you only get one virgin. May I introduce you to your new “friend”, Daisy Cutter. Enjoy yourself, Ms. Cutter, the red-hot strap-ons are over there.

    Posted by andycanuck on 2006 06 09 at 02:06 PM • permalink

  5. Yes, it is much more moral to kill up close and personal, the way Zarqawi did when he beheaded Nick Berg.  Well, Berg was being held captive and was restrained, but, hell, Z-Man could have nicked himself with that dull knife.

    And, of course, most IEDs aren’t really exploded near enough to the guys who built them to matter, but, what the hey, they aren’t nearly as reliant of technology as a JDAM, for instance.

    I wonder if such obdurant moral blindness makes his head hurt?

    Posted by JorgXMcKie on 2006 06 09 at 02:06 PM • permalink

  6. JorgXMcKie-”...most IEDs aren’t really exploded near enough to the guys who built them to matter...”

    Once, we accompanied EOD out to a location a few miles from the FOB where an IED had gone off the night before while three idiots were carrying it on their tractor.

    Oh, there was laughing and pointing that day.

    Posted by 68W40 on 2006 06 09 at 02:20 PM • permalink

  7. Katie Couric, while interviewing a Marine sniper, asked:

    “What do you feel when you shoot a terrorist?”
    The Marine shrugged and replied:

    “Recoil.”

    Posted by lmassie on 2006 06 09 at 02:24 PM • permalink

  8. It’s really too bad Iowahawk can’t bottle some of that brilliance and sell it to the left, as they are in dire need of a sense of humor.  Oh, well, more for us.

    Posted by RebeccaH on 2006 06 09 at 02:25 PM • permalink

  9. 91B30, were they the ones who built it? Or just the ones dim enough to transport it?

    I figure Graham doesn’t regard IEDs as tech weapons.  After all, they require at least some human intervention.

    I agree though, it’s pretty funny and I’m hoping they were eligible for Darwin Awards.

    Posted by JorgXMcKie on 2006 06 09 at 02:30 PM • permalink

  10. JorgXMcKie-they probably weren’t the ones who built it, but we didn’t care-three less assholes to worry about.  The EOD guys (who were always fascinating to talk to) could tell different bombmakers by subtle little things-like how a bombmaker stripped the wire he was going to use (attention to detail kind of stuff). 

    BTW some IEDs are pretty much “fire and forget”, like if you use a pressure device to activate it and bury it under a dirt road.  That requires a lot less risk for the jihadis who don’t have to stick around to trigger it, but you have to not care who gets killed, and most of them don’t.

    Posted by 68W40 on 2006 06 09 at 02:45 PM • permalink

  11. Not to mention, Jorg, that the U.S. hi-tech weapons will just increase the cycle of violence as the Muslims retaliate with their own: the 6-Billion Dinar Man. Yes, we can rebuild him. One hook. One stump. One eye. One severely-burned hand. To make the perfect killing machine. [Cue theme music.]

    Posted by andycanuck on 2006 06 09 at 02:50 PM • permalink

  12. SSG Medic, you got that right! Man, there is nothing funnier, and I mean NOTHING than when these yahoos prematurely detonate.  Whether its an IED, a VBIED, or a vest, it is just funny as hell when they blow up in their stinking, grimy, little dick-beaters.

    Posted by Texas Bob on 2006 06 09 at 04:13 PM • permalink

  13. ABC’s John Faine tried the same question about turning Zarqawi into a “martyr” during an interview with the PM yesterday. Howard’s answer was he would rather him a dead “martyr” than a live “Hero”.

    Posted by chrisgo on 2006 06 09 at 04:45 PM • permalink

  14. I wanted to thank everyone for their kind words on the death of my nephew.  I figured I couldn’t pick a better place than one of the wonderful threads about the death of the bastard Abooooo Al, AKA the Zarkman.  You have no idea how it has lifted the spirits of my family to see him dead!  It was almost like he was taken out just to give us solace.  In a way, it was!

    My family sends its thanks as well.  (A friend emailed the thread to me and my sister.)  It is stunning to think that people half a world away mourn our loss with us.  Thank you all.  You will never know how your words have touched us, especially me.

    Now go party hardy.  Give an extra toast for Charley-O, for no one would be happier the bastard is dead than he would have been.

    Posted by saltydog on 2006 06 09 at 05:51 PM • permalink

  15. #14 - Slainte!

    Posted by Achillea on 2006 06 09 at 06:25 PM • permalink

  16. Saltydog: My condolences on the death of your nephew—I had not seen the earlier report.

    My nephew served in OIF II (Spring ‘04-‘05) as a weapons squad sergeant in the Army—an activated reservist.

    I’ve included below an email from my nephew (after his return from Iraq), in the hopes that his sentiments, as reflected therein, will serve to comfort you and your family with the knowledge of what service in Iraq means to these young soldiers, sailors, and marines.

    The “trigger” for his email is the well-traveled urban legend of an Iraqi woman confronting a check-out cashier here in the States. His thoughts on service and the war in Iraq proceeds from that.

    May God blees your family.
    Forbes

    Posted by Forbes on 2006 06 09 at 06:43 PM • permalink

  17. My nephew:
    “I’ve been forwarded this check out cashier story from several people quite a few times in the past year or so. Although I think it is a good story, I doubt that such an event ever took place. Muslim women are not outspoken, especially if they wear traditional clothing. And other than Sunni women in Iraq, I have not met any Iraqi women who were against US military involvement there. The problem that I have with stories like these however is the way that they are told and, like the media, purported to be true without any rational or stated factual basis. These stories are a little dangerous because they paint the world in broad strokes and further divide people because they play to certain beliefs while disregarding the validity of any thoughts in opposition.
    Don’t get me wrong, here at CU-Boulder I am surrounded by super liberal thinkers everyday and no one will convince me that the good we have done in Iraq is outweighed by the bad that is sensationalized by the media and a self deprecating sentiment that seems to be shared by the Democrats of our country. Unlike many of my fellow students who claim traveling abroad is so hard now, I will never apologize to anyone for being an American or for supporting a just war and I refuse to believe that we should feel sorry because we enjoy better lives than most of the world. I don’t mind being unpopular, when you are part of a global hegemon you have a responsibility to make hard choices in order to improve the quality of life around the world.
    Even if improving the world is not our government’s policy or the reason that we are involved in Iraq, the benefits of being an American allow us to take steps in our own ways to make the world a better place. How many other countries have a Peace Corps or the kind of non-profit organizations that allow Americans to spread goodwill throughout the world? We have the resources, the standard of living, and the educated populace necessary to make an impact on an international level. If you don’t like our foreign policy you can join any number of organizations that will allow you to make a difference. Not a single member of my platoon was in Iraq to secure US oil supply. Maybe (if you want to play devil’s advocate) that is why my platoon was in Iraq, but at a grassroots level we spent every day of our deployment making decisions and interacting with the Iraqi people with the belief that we were minimizing civilian casualties, fighting an unwanted insurgency, and giving the people of Iraq the room and time that they need to find their own way. This was not just the feeling of the individuals in my platoon. This is what the majority of young American men and women believe they are doing by fighting in Iraq.
    I think that it is fairly clear that the US military cannot possibly win or lose what happens in Iraq. But we can support a people who have a chance to bring a beautiful thing to the middle east. The benefits of a democratic Iraq are the same as when our country became independent of England. Just like in Europe after 1775, democracy will spread across the middle east as the subjugated peoples of those lands see the changes being successfully made around them. At least, that’s the hope and I believe that the possibilities presented by that hope far outweigh the human cost.
    I know where I’ve been and what I’ve done, I am not moved by the sentiments of strangers who have no idea what they are talking about whether they support me or not. I am increasingly aware that the people who have “support our troops” stickers on their cars, but who also proclaim that they don’t support the war are hypocrites. The US military is an extremely effective 100% volunteer force. Nobody has died who didn’t know that that was a possibility. At the same time US troops do not imagine that they are going off to die for their country, that would be a self defeating attitude. We do what we do for thousands of reasons, but in the end we believe that we are doing good. And not good for Bush or the government or the people at home who regurgitate sound bytes from a commercial media. You cannot support our troops if you do not support what they are doing and the troops are trying to improve American security by spreading democratic ideas. You might not support the way that we are trying to accomplish that, but the Iraqi people are better off without Saddam Hussein no matter what happens next. Better off because now they can make choices.

    Posted by Forbes on 2006 06 09 at 06:45 PM • permalink

  18. Continued:
    Few times has anything good come in this world without conflict. If democracy spreads across the middle east there is a good chance that we will see more war. Theocrats and despots do not give up their power without a fight. That doesn’t mean that liberty isn’t worth fighting for. People die. It is inevitable no matter how cautious or unwilling to risk you are. No one is going to live forever and most of the time we have on this earth is wasted. I would rather die young with the belief that at least I was taking part in something important than to live to be a thousand years old and never have done anything worthwhile. It is tragic that people around the world die in unjust wars. It is more tragic that most people are too afraid of death to do anything selfless and beneficial.
    Our country is divided on all of these issues and everyone thinks that their beliefs are justified. My advice is to be wary of anything that too closely resembles your own beliefs. It doesn’t do anything to solve the problems. Search out opposing viewpoints and look at them objectively. None of us have all the information and all of us are flawed by our own egos. We have a responsibility to ask questions in this country because men have died to give us that right. That doesn’t mean that there should not be a degree of maturity and responsibility in that questioning. No war has ever been fought by this country where victory was assured. Mistakes happen. The future is uncertain. Don’t just talk about your beliefs, turn them into actions and make your time here worthwhile. Death is breathing down all our necks whether we fight in Iraq or sit back and do nothing. I’m not telling anyone to join the military, but find a way to use your individual talents and resources to contribute to the causes you believe in. That is what being an American is about.

    Posted by Forbes on 2006 06 09 at 06:45 PM • permalink

  19. #8: It’s really too bad Iowahawk can’t bottle some of that brilliance and sell it to the left . . .

    Nah, they’d just spill it all over the kitchen table and ruin their Sheehan for President flyers.

    Posted by paco on 2006 06 09 at 07:01 PM • permalink

  20. So Paco Enterprises does have the exclusive bottling franchise for Iowahawk…

    Posted by Forbes on 2006 06 09 at 07:15 PM • permalink

  21. #20: Paco Enterprises isn’t worthy to clean the windshield of Iowahawk’s “Coupe of Justice”.

    Posted by paco on 2006 06 09 at 07:19 PM • permalink

  22. Excellent email, Forbes.

    Best wishes, saltydog.

    Please don’t mix up the Sumerian meade bottles with the brilliance bottles, paco.  I had the devil’s own explaining the last incident to our Dark Master.

    Posted by RebeccaH on 2006 06 09 at 08:12 PM • permalink

  23. Tim, I think Zarqawi instead of arriving in Disneyland has found himself in Michael Jackson’s new Neverland Ranch; Zarqawi now looking like a young boy.

    At least he will get a lot of loving.

    Posted by youngy on 2006 06 09 at 08:13 PM • permalink

  24. Forbes, your nephew must be a fine young man - reasonable, serious and eloquent.  What a breath of fresh air compared to the juvenile, illogical, self-centred rants that come from the ‘activist’ mobs.

    Posted by Janice on 2006 06 09 at 08:21 PM • permalink

  25. “our” ABC’s latest attempt to shill for the head hackers seems to be inferring that Zarquawi was either
    A: Wounded and denied medical aid
    B: Wounded and executed by either the Americans or the Iraqi’s he was handed over to.

    BTW ABC please try to refrain from having your reporters refer to a murdering scumbag as a “martyr”. Kind of makes RWDB’s think you may not quite get the our side-their side part of things.

    Posted by thefrollickingmole on 2006 06 09 at 08:57 PM • permalink

  26. They were saying on the news tonight that the bastard wasn’t killed instantly.

    Good. He lived for a few minutes….hopefully in intense agony, and with the realization that he had been smoked!

    Posted by rinardman on 2006 06 09 at 09:51 PM • permalink

  27. Regarding the picture - what is it with white pick-ups and the Middle East?

    Posted by Dave S. on 2006 06 09 at 10:16 PM • permalink

  28. #7 - the sniper thing is funny, but it’s an urban legend.

    Posted by Dave S. on 2006 06 09 at 10:19 PM • permalink

  29. Dave S.-apparently we bought a lot of Toyota pickups for the IA and IP to use.  The real question is why does every other car have orange fenders?

    Posted by 68W40 on 2006 06 09 at 10:23 PM • permalink

  30. Texas Bob-EOD was always making “knocked your dick in the dirt” jokes.  Once that was one of the only clearly identifiable parts left of a suicide bomber.  I bet his virgins were pretty disappointed.

    Posted by 68W40 on 2006 06 09 at 10:30 PM • permalink

  31. Forbes: That kid has his head screwed on straight. Thanks for sharing.

    Salty: You and your sister and your nephew were the first ones I thought of when I heard the news on Zarqawi. Be well.

    Posted by paco on 2006 06 09 at 10:37 PM • permalink

  32. Well done, Nephew of Forbes. A fine example of why we are justifiably so proud of our troops, you speak eloquently about why I did, do and will continue to support the GWOT and its critical Iraq phase. ...but at a grassroots level we spent every day of our deployment making decisions and interacting with the Iraqi people with the belief that we were minimizing civilian casualties, fighting an unwanted insurgency, and giving the people of Iraq the room and time that they need to find their own way. Excellent.

    Keep on keepin’ on, Saltydog. Glad you checked in.

    Hopefully Zarqawi was lucid enough in his final moments to recognize US Special Forces when he saw them. Greetings from President George W. Bush, al-scumbag.

    Posted by Kyda Sylvester on 2006 06 09 at 10:41 PM • permalink

  33. #30

    Texas Bob-EOD was always making “knocked your dick in the dirt” jokes. Once that was one of the only clearly identifiable parts left of a suicide bomber. I bet his virgins were pretty disappointed.

    Especially as Muslims aren’t allowed to pork, eh, 91B30?

    Posted by andycanuck on 2006 06 09 at 11:25 PM • permalink

  34. Andycanuck-sure but I hope Zarkman is hearing “squeal like a pig” a lot now.

    Posted by 68W40 on 2006 06 09 at 11:32 PM • permalink

  35. “Are you going to paradise, Father?” says that teenaged one, what’s-her-burqqa.

    “Yeah, but I’ll have people watching out for you,” I says. “So if you’re even thinking about any of that clan dishonor shit, you better watch your back.”

    LOL.  Iowahawk is brilliant.

    Posted by ekb87 on 2006 06 10 at 03:32 AM • permalink

  36. Man, I haven’t laughed so much in years as reading Iowahawk’s latest. All I can say to the Zark is alpha mike foxtrot.

    Posted by AlphaMikeFoxtrot on 2006 06 10 at 05:56 AM • permalink

  37. Forbes, I’m confused.  I thought only low-class dumbass rednecks were allowed to join the army.  But your nephew sounds so much more intelligent than all these college-going whinging and squealing lefty luvvies. 

    Mind—can’t—take—contradiction—

    Posted by ushie on 2006 06 10 at 10:19 AM • permalink

  38. the sniper thing is funny, but it’s an urban legend. Dave S
    - I’ve heard the same thing about you.

    Posted by lmassie on 2006 06 10 at 11:31 AM • permalink

  39. Urbane legend. Like David Niven an’ shit. That’s me.

    Posted by Dave S. on 2006 06 10 at 11:42 AM • permalink

  40. Yup, Dave S., when I think “David Niven” I think, hey, just like that Dave S.!

    Posted by ushie on 2006 06 10 at 11:45 AM • permalink

  41. David Niven an shit. That’s me. Dave S
    Kinda dead though.  Hope you’re feeling better.

    Posted by lmassie on 2006 06 10 at 11:58 AM • permalink

  42. Dave S,
    Did a quick Gogle and now I see what’s meant in your #39 & your friend’s 40

    In the movie Separate Tables Niven actually (really and truly) plays a dirty old man who likes to visit dark cinema halls and sit next to young girls and… The character’s name is Major Angus Pollock. But you know, he might have been a closet homosexual, and if so that character’s name probably should have been:

    Major Anus Pillock

    Posted by lmassie on 2006 06 10 at 12:13 PM • permalink

  43. Iamssie — That ‘recoil’ fable goes back at least as far as Nam.  The wretched Michael Herr even included it in his fabricated ‘Dispatches’ as I recall…

    Posted by richard mcenroe on 2006 06 10 at 12:27 PM • permalink

  44. Yup, kind of figured that out.
    Didn’t know this blog was anything more than a way to kill some time, but in case it’s used in some furture history class, I’ll make sure to put (it’s a joke) in front of some future postings.
    Really some of you need a Paco infusion and lighten up.
    RM- make sure to use the opening I’ve given you in your reply.

    Posted by lmassie on 2006 06 10 at 12:48 PM • permalink

  45. Richard, Dave: And in case you don’t know how to lighten up, just follow the example set by lmassie here. Talk about taking things easy and not overreacting at all, hey.

    Posted by PW on 2006 06 10 at 03:02 PM • permalink

  46. PW — How dare you accuse me of overreacting>?!  Are you a Nazi?!

    Posted by richard mcenroe on 2006 06 10 at 03:49 PM • permalink

  47. BTW, much fun at the countermarch last night.  Strung bunting, put up a sign reading ZARQAWI DEAD!  BUSH STILL PRESIDENT! and then we drank a toast in front of the MoveOnBots.

    And there was much snivelling…

    Posted by richard mcenroe on 2006 06 10 at 03:52 PM • permalink

  48. Sorry PU, I’ll be quiet.

    Posted by lmassie on 2006 06 10 at 04:12 PM • permalink

  49. #43 - Ah, but it’s a ‘fable that bespeaks a reality.’

    Posted by Achillea on 2006 06 10 at 05:51 PM • permalink

  50. Richard, Dave: And in case you don’t know how to lighten up, just follow the example set by lmassie here. Talk about taking things easy and not overreacting at all, hey.

    Yeah, my post #28 was positively feral. I was more animal than man.

    Posted by Dave S. on 2006 06 11 at 12:25 AM • permalink

  51. Yup, Dave S., when I think “Animal” I think, hey, just like that Dave S.!

    Posted by ushie on 2006 06 11 at 11:18 AM • permalink

  52. ROWR!

    Posted by Dave S. on 2006 06 11 at 11:41 AM • permalink

  53. #37—ushie: Yup, nephew enlisted as a high school senior, from a rural upstate NY town (pop. 6400)—so he fits most of the profile. Served in the 82nd Airborne. Entered college after his discharge from active duty, but alas, his freshman year was interrupted by 9/11, and various reserve-duty mobilizations subsequent thereto. Completion of Iraq rotation fulfilled his original enlistment obligation/commitment, so now he’s a civilian, a veteran, and an undergraduate. Far from your typical college student!

    To take up the slack, his older sister, who just graduated from Brown Medical School, begins her service next month at Walter Reed Army Medical Center (as a Captain).

    (Yes, proud family all around, but also makes rest of us look like pikers!)

    Posted by Forbes on 2006 06 11 at 05:14 PM • permalink

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