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DAS BULK
The mighty Pasha Bulker has resisted an initial attempt to free it:
Three weeks after it beached in savage storms, the stricken bulk carrier Pasha Bulker is just 5m closer to returning to sea.
And with industry sources estimating a cost of more than $200,000 for each day it stays stranded, those 5m have cost the Pasha Bulker’s Japanese owners Fukujin Kisen, or at least its insurance company, $4.2m – or $840,000 a metre.
But Newcastle is cashing in:
“The wave of tourism has been incredible, I’ve had to put on extra staff to cope with the crowds that come in,” Last Drop Cafe owner Monique Lee said.
“I’d be happy if they left it there as a permanent tourist attraction.”
Newcastle City Council tourism manager Shawn Day said the economic benefits had been “huge”.
Which is why locals were possibly anxious, ahead of Thursday night’s rescue bid, that the Bulker stay a while longer:
Police blocked off parts of the city’s east yesterday as a safety precaution as residents crowded under any shelter they could find to watch.
Many residents had mixed feelings. One said, “That ship is like our new best friend.”
The ABC’s Simone Thurtell is a fan:
The Pasha actually looks lovely, lit up beautifully and swaying side to side as the waves crash over the stern.
Everybody loves the Pasha Bulker, a coal-hauling, 40,000-tonne metal friend who just won’t quit. Also, there are burgers:
I gather that one fast food outlet is even selling a Pasha Bulker hamburger.
brett l, you don’t need a permit into places like Portland Roads or Lockhart River because the Customs people are usually up in the Torres Strait. Once you’re inside the 200km zone there’s usually no problem on the coast. We have one quarantine buoy here in Newcastle and nobody ever ties up to it. The customs people pay a visit once a month.
It’s surprising more of us aren’t people smugglers.
Those are some beautiful photographs. I once say a large fishing boat that had run aground in North Carolina after a big storm. Early in the morning, with the sun still rising out of the sea, and the surf gentle and seemingly exhausted after the previous day’s gale. It was a lovely sight, indeed; I’d have given anything to have had a camera with me that day. Though there was a tragic story behind it. The crew had abandoned the ship during the height of the storm, and the captain died of a heart attack in the lifeboat (the only man who perished in the storm).
That Thunderbirds Pasha Bulker vid is hilarious. So is this Transformers Pasha Bulker
Well, based on a very unfortunate experience, I think I might know what the problem is. A year back I hired a private detective to track down and extricate two stolen antiquities, both of which are extremely valuable. The PI charged me $5,000 a day plus expenses. At the time I thought those terms were exorbitant. But my security consultants, Perky Alert Care Officers, highly recommended him, saying he was well worth the cost.
Everyday I’d call his office, asking how he was doing. Each time some gum cracking broad with a strong Brooklyn accent would answer the phone with a “yeah, whaddaya want?” I’d politely ask for a progress report and she would snort a chuckle and tell me that her boss says he’s close. So so close to obtaining my property. Just a few days more.
After 100 days of that bull shit and
no Zulu spearantiquities, I severed our contract. And let me tell you, I told that secretary in no uncertain terms that I was not at all happy with the performance of her boss. I’m sure she relayed my feelings to him.The thing that still rankles me is his expenses. Five Seasons Hotel in Las Vegas? The Hotel Orleans in Paris? Why would he go there when that
she monster in stilettospotential perpetrator is located in Orlando? And first class seats on the best airlines. Two seats. Why? One seat wasn’t big enough for his butt?(wronwright notices Nic looking at him with an unhappy expression)
Well, anyway, I suggest promising the salvaging company a fixed fee and let spend as much time and money as they think necessary - on their dime. Otherwise, you’ll get charges for reimbursements for foot massages by Tokyo geishas. And yes, I have those too!
Posted by wronwright on 2007 06 29 at 01:39 PM • permalinkI gather that one fast food outlet is even selling a Pasha Bulker hamburger.
BUAWHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! A double slam for the price of one. The Greenies hate coal, and PETA pukes hate carnivorous humans.
Posted by The_Real_JeffS on 2007 06 29 at 01:43 PM • permalink# 11 wronwright: Uhmmmm…I share your
suspicionsconcerns. And I agree with your solution (but what’s with the foot massages? - Oh, ahh, never mind ‘bout that). Bet the Pasha would be floatin’ free within the hour.Hey! (Keep this between you and me, OK?) D’ya think the locals might be, you know,
sabotagingwishing the Pasha will not budge?Indefinitely?SandiM,
Believe me, I also wondered why Detective paco need foot massages. By a geisha no less. In Tokyo! But I could only get ahold of that secretary and she would just laugh uproariously when I’d read off the travel expenses. I suspect that a few times she had put me on speak phone because I heard several women laughing. And then she would something cryptic like “well, a rolling stone gathers no moss”. Huh?
As far as whether the locals are involved, I will only say this is New Castle we’re talking about. New Castle. Anything is possible.
Posted by wronwright on 2007 06 29 at 03:18 PM • permalinkEven worse, it’s Newcastle (one word). That makes it much much worse.
Posted by wronwright on 2007 06 29 at 03:19 PM • permalinkWronwright: You know why they call us gumshoes? Because we walk around a lot. That’s the reason for the foot massages. And it wasn’t just foot massages, anyway, it was also . . . well, never mind about the rest of it; you can take my word - I kept the expenses to the absolute minimum.
Anyhow, it’s a shame you cancelled that contract because we were just on the verge of recovering your property. Man, I can practically smell those Zulu spears and Apache tomahawks . . .
One said, “That ship is like our new best friend.”
Three words for you, dork-face: Pa-the-tic. Ya’ need to get a life.
Posted by Barbara Skolaut on 2007 06 29 at 03:47 PM • permalink#16 #17 wronwright: Newcastle. One word. You’re right. That makes it much worse than we thought. And, NOBBY’s Beach, Newcastle, no less. The thick plottens, does it not, monsieur?
What are we missing? There’s something here we’re not seeing. We’ll have to go back through all the evidence.
O, oh!! Did I get my Poirot, Pink Panther and CSI mixed up? AGAIN? I hate it when that happens.
By the way, I was watching it on the beach-cam Tim linked to (yesterday? whenever), and thought how incredible it was to be sitting here in an office in Richmond, Virginia, USA, and watch the waves roll up on the shore a half a world away.
It was wonderful. Thanks, Tim! :-D
Posted by Barbara Skolaut on 2007 06 29 at 03:52 PM • permalinkIs a major offshore tourist attraction near your town about to be removed—and all of that tourist money with it, friend? Then contact the good people at the Parked Aground Collier Office® to set your community up with a wreck of its own that won’t cost nearly as much as e.g. an Olympic stadium. PACO® will carefully match the size of shipwreck to match local infrastructure and conditions. PACO®, hawkers to gawkers for over 2 years. (Polar bears and Green protesters sold separately.)
Posted by andycanuck on 2007 06 29 at 04:37 PM • permalinkOf course its a tourist attraction in the winter, when nobody minds that the police have completely closed off the beach (and half of the surrounding roads) - but if it had happened in the summer, you can bet it would be a different story. A few locals would have hauled it back to sea themselves, just to get the beach back.
“The Pasha actually looks lovely, lit up beautifully…” Didn’t Ronald Reagan say something similar about oil rigs off the California coast?
Posted by dean martin on 2007 06 29 at 06:14 PM • permalinkHere’s a pic of the Pasha Bulker, guaranteed to bulk you up.
Posted by Jabba the Tutt on 2007 06 29 at 07:59 PM • permalinkWhat does “Thank you Mr. Chopper” mean? And whaaaaaaaat dooooooooeees a yelllllow liiiiiiight…MEAN!
Posted by dean martin on 2007 06 29 at 08:48 PM • permalink#18 paco -
Anyhow, it’s a shame you cancelled that contract because we were just on the verge of recovering your property. Man, I can practically smell those Zulu spears and Apache tomahawks . . .
No. Andrea has my Zulu spear and Norman shield. I never said anything about—
Oh shit. Annnnnddddreeeeaaaaa!
(shouted in a Rocky Balboa voice)
Posted by wronwright on 2007 06 29 at 08:54 PM • permalinkI just hate balancing all my Swiss bank accounts, especially the ones in the name of my (excised). Figures are so dull. But then I was aware of an annoying whiny noise, and faintly discerned the sounds of “my Zulu spear!” and “she-beast in Orlando.” I checked my spy monitors—sure enough, the wronwright mode was activated. I use a text-reader so I don’t have to actually waste my eyeballs reading certain items, but I had turned the sound down so it wouldn’t distract me. Not far enough down, though.
Anyway, I have a certain PI’s traveling expenses (all for the cause, but my, haven’t prices gone up in Las Vegas) to audit (I am not paying for something called “Madame Song-Ling’s Singing Lovelies Wine Bar and Massage Emporium”—he can very well pay for whatever “services” Madame Song Ling & Co. provided himself), to figure out where in my new lair to hang a Zulu spear I acquired, and a tentative plan for retrofitting a large (currently beached somewhere) cargo ship with concealed laser cannons and such to look over, so wronwright will have to be dealt with later.
Posted by Andrea Harris, Administrator on 2007 06 29 at 09:06 PM • permalinkThis Pasha Bulka thing reminds me that while Newcastle is losing the industrial base of its economy and moving towards tourism it appears - from an outsiders’ perspective at least - that they have done frig all to actually encourage tourism to the town.
Anyone seen Dubai lately? That’s what you do if you’re serious about transitioning to a tourist economy. Not that Newcastle would have that kind of money sloshing around - but surely they could do something with a bit of imagination.
What Newcastle needs is a sure-thing tourist attraction that would be appropriate for the town.
Here’s my suggestion - a huge freakin’ statue of the big union leader.
Visitors could be compelled, by whatever means necessary, to pay an entry fee with a small contribution from their weekly wage - say, 10 per cent. Much of the revenue could go directly to the ALP, and tour guides could be given safe seats at each election.
Posted by Margos Maid on 2007 06 29 at 11:05 PM • permalinkPaco: my minions are everywhere, and the ones in Tibet are especially loyal.
Posted by Andrea Harris, Administrator on 2007 06 29 at 11:05 PM • permalinkAndrea does that mean you are a minionairess?
Posted by surfmaster on 2007 06 29 at 11:25 PM • permalinkHow does someone like Joe Tripodi get to his station in life without any presentation skills. The medium’s the message Joe and you are the medium and you come over like a primary school teacher preparing a biology class for a trip to the local mangroves.
“And when we get there…..and does everyone have their hat and cream on…....and do I have all the parent approval forms signed…....okie dokes let’s go…..
Why isn’t Dirk Pitt on the case?
Because a ghastly prose style and overbudgeted movies never solved anything.
If they offer to drop Penelope Cruz on you, though, accept.
Posted by richard mcenroe on 2007 06 30 at 01:36 AM • permalinkI read a Clive Cussler book once when I had a couple of hours to kill. I don’t remember any of it. (Sorry, I’m a mean drunk.)
Posted by dean martin on 2007 06 30 at 04:40 AM • permalink#36
Paco: my minions are everywhere, and the ones in Tibet are especially loyal.Harrumph! Especially loyal indeed! Of bloody course they are, 20 years of loyal service there and they get a transfer to Florida, and after 20 years of pale blue skin, being up to your eyeballs in snow all the time and living on rancid yak butter they really DO think they have died and gone to heaven.
Anyhoo, Mighty Mistress Andrea, they have all been given the photographs of the person wanted for a quiet chat as ordered, and briefed on what to do. I must say the harpoons add a slightly humorous flavour to your plans, which are as fiendishly malignant as ever.
The skinning roomerm… your ‘special entertainment facility’ is all freshly cleaned and yourskinning kniveserm… ‘favourite tools’ sharpened. Oh, and a fresh batch of pure chili oil has been supplied along with a new wire brush. I remember the last time.Oh, I have also organised to make a new CD from this ‘entertainment’: ‘Listening Pleasure from the VRWC, Screaming and Begging for Mercy Vol 3,482’
Yours grovellingly
MarkL
Minionmeister to the VRWCMy gosh Mark, Media Watch will devote a whole week’s show on just your one comment.
(sure hope Nic doesn’t read this thread)
Posted by wronwright on 2007 06 30 at 10:21 AM • permalink
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Tonight’s the full moon and a blue moon and a 1.7m tide, but the Pasha B won’t be leaving us. We wish she would, but she’s going to be a job for the scrappers.