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CRUEL ICE IN RETREAT

Global warming is turning Greenland green again:

Stefan Magnusson lives at the foot of a giant, melting glacier. Some think he’s living on the brink of a cataclysm. He believes he’s on the cusp of creation.

The 49-year-old reindeer rancher says a warming trend in Greenland over the past decade has caused the glacier on his farm to retreat 300 feet, revealing land that hasn’t seen the light of day for hundreds of years, if not more. Where ice once gripped the earth, he says, his reindeer now graze on wild thyme amid the purple blooms of Niviarsiaq flowers ...

"We are seeing genesis by the edge of the glacier,” he says.

Genesis? The way Al Gore sees it, those happy reindeer and thriving vegetation represent the apocalypse:

In former Vice President Al Gore’s recent film “An Inconvenient Truth,” the melting of Greenland’s ice cap, along with a similar cap in the Antarctic, is portrayed as one of the greatest threats of global warming. If the layers of ice and snow holding billions of tons of water were to melt, scientists warn that global sea levels would rise by 40 feet, submerging lower Manhattan, the Netherlands and much of California.

But to many of the people who live here in Greenland, the warming trend is a boon, not a threat.

Lay off with the environmental imperialism, Al! Let the people of Greenland live ice-free! Meanwhile, Al warns that democracy is under attack, which isn’t exactly news. Except that Gore is more worried about TV networks than terrorism:

The former presidential candidate said television networks in the world’s biggest and most powerful democracies must do more to foster debate, which he said was crucial for democracy to flourish.

He may have a point; after all, the last time Al Gore was involved in a series of debates, it resulted in the election of George W. Bush.

UPDATE. Mr. Hackenbacker:

My God! All the polar bears will be dying of obesity! They’ll become a species of floe potatoes as they’ll only have to reach over to gnaw on a passing reindeer. Soon they’ll be too big to fit through all the ice-holes, and then the eskimos will all starve because their fish holes are all clogged with fat lazy bears.

Posted by Tim B. on 08/28/2006 at 01:50 AM
  1. Load up the wagon, Ethel, it’s the new frontier.

    Posted by slammer on 2006 08 28 at 01:59 AM • permalink

  2. Can we send all the Greenies there?

    Posted by Brett_McS on 2006 08 28 at 02:06 AM • permalink

  3. Those reindeer are destroying the delicate eco-system.  Check for frogs!

    Posted by anthony_r on 2006 08 28 at 02:10 AM • permalink

  4. Greenland has been there, done that before. When the Vikings arrived there around 1,200 years ago, they planted grape vines, corn and other crops.

    Damned hard to do that through 3 feet of ice!

    Posted by Bonmot on 2006 08 28 at 02:16 AM • permalink

  5. So what you’re saying Bonmot is that global warming causes Viking invasions- be scared Greenlanders!

    Posted by Mattofact on 2006 08 28 at 02:37 AM • permalink

  6. He farms Reindeer? Santa’s friends? For meat?

    No wonder Gaia is very, very angry.

    Posted by Nic on 2006 08 28 at 03:09 AM • permalink

  7. Like if it was all ice, it would be called Whiteland.  I’m damned if I can think how it ever got called Greenland.  Anybody can help me with that one?

    Posted by Bonmot on 2006 08 28 at 03:16 AM • permalink

  8. must do more to foster debate

    If he’s serious, the MSM would start looking towards conservative anchors and reporters.

    But of course, that’s not what he means.

    Gore simply wants more Lefties attacking the Bush Administration - after all, that’s what passes for “fostering debate” in the universities.

    Posted by Apparatchik on 2006 08 28 at 03:22 AM • permalink

  9. Where ice once gripped the earth, he says, his reindeer now graze on wild thyme amid the purple blooms of Niviarsiaq flowers ...

    My God!  All the polar bears will be dying of obesity!  They’ll become a species of floe potatoes as they’ll only have to reach over to gnaw on a passing reindeer.  Soon they’ll be too big to fit through all the ice-holes, and then the eskimos will all starve because their fish holes are all clogged with fat lazy bears.

    Won’t anyone think of the bears?!?!

    Posted by Mr Hackenbacker on 2006 08 28 at 03:25 AM • permalink

  10. #7 - Deceptive naming isn’t exclusive to Greenland. I found it all over the lower parts of Western Australia: nobody in Esperance spoke Esperanto, Albany was utterly devoid of Albanians, and you can forget about widgies in Widgiemooltha.

    Posted by SwinishCapitalist on 2006 08 28 at 03:33 AM • permalink

  11. not sure about this one… he previously had a glacier on his farm??  and now he doesn’t?? Sounds like a pretty understanding Lands Title office in Greenland. And while I’m on the subject, if global warming is so bad, why do 300 Australians A DAY, move to Queensland??

    Posted by PH on 2006 08 28 at 03:34 AM • permalink

  12. Gore replied: “I don’t think [Bush is] unintelligent at all. He’s incurious ... there’s a puzzling lack of curiosity."

    Why is that?

    Posted by rhhardin on 2006 08 28 at 03:37 AM • permalink

  13. Memo to MSM media organisations:

    ‘Former Vice-President Al Gore’ I can stomach...just.

    But ‘Former presidential candidate’...well enough already.

    That corpse has well and truly been worked over by the maggots.

    He had a snowflakes chance.

    Posted by Jay Santos on 2006 08 28 at 03:42 AM • permalink

  14. #10 widgie

    for the information of those who don’t know.

    Posted by kae on 2006 08 28 at 04:23 AM • permalink

  15. ABC Brisbane presenters have viewed a screening of Gore’s “An Inconvenient Truth”.

    Giving away free tickets to those who they think should see it…

    1. 5 4WD owners (SUVs)
    2. 5 People who have never looked at the energy star rating on white goods they have purchased.

    I’m waiting for them to ask for those who think the whole thing is a crock of shit, then I’ll phone.

    Wonder what the concensus will be after the screening for their listeners?

    Oh, and this morning on ABC radio some ‘scientist’ frothing about running out of oil.

    *sigh*
    I have to move closer to work, one and a half hours of this crap each day will drive me crazy(er).

    Posted by kae on 2006 08 28 at 04:29 AM • permalink

  16. #15 Kae - are you saying the ABC is promoting this film? The brain dead FM stations are always giving free stuff away for promos. But the ABC?

    I think this needs further investigation. Promos could be construed as advertising which is against the ABC charter. Perhaps the Government will be forced to close down the ABC over this matter. Shame really. Sheesh.

    Posted by Bonmot on 2006 08 28 at 04:37 AM • permalink

  17. #7 I think that calling it Greenland was an early example of real-estate advertising.

    Posted by Burbank on 2006 08 28 at 04:50 AM • permalink

  18. Thyme-flavoured deer. Yeah that’d work.

    Posted by Henry boy on 2006 08 28 at 05:00 AM • permalink

  19. Not sure if Tim’s already mentioned this, but those dwindling Greeland glaciers “have been shrinking for the past century, according to a Danish study published today, suggesting that the ice melt is not a recent phenomenon caused by global warming.”

    The study covered 247 glaciers, and is “the most comprehensive” ever done of Greelandish ice sheets.

    So, the shrinkage started about 130 years ago.  Hmm.  Wasn’t that right after Bush was elected?

    Posted by arrowhead ripper on 2006 08 28 at 05:46 AM • permalink

  20. #19 bonjour triteness:  No, that was his great-grand dad, who had the Kaiser and Rasputin over for tea.

    Posted by ushie on 2006 08 28 at 05:52 AM • permalink

  21. Well, thank god for repeats.  I flicked on the ABC at 8:30. There was Al Gore spreading doom on Four Corners, talking about greenland flooding the world. I grabbed for the remote, went to SBS and found back to back episodes of South Park.

    Aaaah relief.

    Posted by Francis H on 2006 08 28 at 07:37 AM • permalink

  22. ” ... genesis by the edge of the glacier.” What a beautiful phrase! How different from Al’s vision of apocalypse.

    Posted by paco on 2006 08 28 at 07:50 AM • permalink

  23. Methinks that if Algore stopped talking so much, “global warming” would be reduced in direction proportion to the lower amount of hot air he injects into the atmosphere.

    Posted by The_Real_JeffS on 2006 08 28 at 09:47 AM • permalink

  24. What about the testicles? Won’t someone please think of the bear testicles?

    Posted by fidens on 2006 08 28 at 10:19 AM • permalink

  25. #6 Not Prancer,not Dancer,not Donner and Blitzen...WAIL.

    Posted by crash on 2006 08 28 at 10:35 AM • permalink

  26. scientists warn that global sea levels would rise by 40 feet, submerging lower Manhattan, the Netherlands and much of California.

    I don’t know, a regreened Greenland sounds like a fair trade to me.

    Posted by RebeccaH on 2006 08 28 at 11:23 AM • permalink

  27. Won’t someone please think of the bear testicles?

    You can if you like, fidens.  I have other interests.  ;-P

    Posted by The_Real_JeffS on 2006 08 28 at 11:23 AM • permalink

  28. The name Greenland was certainly a case of real estate advertising.  People managed to farm there for quite some time, however.  If the glaciers are melting I wonder if any archaeology plans are in the works?

    And speaking of reindeer, the local feed store and saddle shop has reindeer hides for sale.  Beautiful (if way beyond my budget) soft tanned leather and the fur (okay, not technically *fur*) is as soft and plush, I felt anything so nice that *wasn’t* fur.

    Posted by Synova on 2006 08 28 at 02:19 PM • permalink

  29. Aw, Gore’s just sore ‘cause his lame cable channel is such a market place dud.

    Posted by Kyda Sylvester on 2006 08 28 at 03:43 PM • permalink

  30. ”...scientists warn that global sea levels would rise by 40 feet, submerging lower Manhattan, the Netherlands and much of California."

    I live on a boat.  I’m prepared.

    Posted by saltydog on 2006 08 28 at 05:04 PM • permalink

  31. #29: Is that thing still around?!? I figured Al would be hawking windmills and solar panels on some early-hours infomercial channel by now.

    #30: scientists warn that global sea levels would rise by 40 feet, submerging lower Manhattan How long can Wolcott tread water?

    Posted by paco on 2006 08 28 at 05:15 PM • permalink

  32. ”...scientists warn that global sea levels would rise by 40 feet, submerging lower Manhattan, the Netherlands and much of California."

    I’m trying, and failing, to see the downside in this.

    Posted by Andrea Harris, Administrator on 2006 08 28 at 06:19 PM • permalink

  33. the last time Al Gore was involved in a series of debates, it resulted in the election of George W. Bush

    ROFL!

    That’s gonna leave a mark. :-D

    Posted by Barbara Skolaut on 2006 08 28 at 07:34 PM • permalink

  34. Saltydog-- but you gotta beware the reefs in Idaho…

    Posted by richard mcenroe on 2006 08 28 at 08:12 PM • permalink

  35. So more arable land gets created, resulting in more agricultural production, hence more food, and the Left is upset about that?  I guess I can see their point.  I mean if we can eventually put all of Greenland under cultivation, Paul Ehrlich’s hope prediction that we’ll all starve to death by 1980 will be a conplete crock of shit!

    Posted by Vanguard of the Commentariat on 2006 08 28 at 10:51 PM • permalink

  36. Corn and grapes? No, Greenland never got that warm. Wheat and Barley yes.

    Concord grapes were known to grow up around New Foundland at the time. No word on wine grapes per se.

    BTW, the glaciers in Greenland are melting faster now than they had before. Except for the ones along the western range, which are growing.

    Posted by mythusmage on 2006 08 29 at 03:29 AM • permalink

  37. >> ”...scientists warn that global sea levels
    >> would rise by 40 feet, submerging lower
    >> Manhattan, the Netherlands and much of California.”

    > I’m trying, and failing, to see the downside > in this. Posted by Andrea Harris,
    > Administrator on 2006 08 28 at 06:19 PM • permalink

    How hard did you try ?
    Not familiar with the location of every Australian state capital in relation to the coast ?

    Posted by Tank on 2006 08 31 at 06:03 AM • permalink

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