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CRITTERS THRIVING

Behold the goodness that is global warming:

In spite of dire warnings about climate change, the most northerly reaches of Scandinavia are basking in good news: reindeer are growing stronger and the salmon larger. New possibilities are opening up for tourism trade and even for wine-makers.

In Rovaniemi, Father Christmas’s Lapland home in northern Finland, reindeer are putting on weight. Jan-Eric Paadar, a herdsman’s son in the northerly Inari region, said recent shorter winters meant Finland’s 200,000 reindeer had longer to graze on grass and lichen. “It’s easier to find food when the winter comes later and later all the time,” he said.

The same applies to Norway, where the government reindeer department has reported four bumper grazing years. “They are in good condition. Last year there was a very good market for reindeer meat,” said Christian Lindman, a spokesman.

Salmon farmers are also benefiting. At Volden, a family-run salmon and trout producer in the coastal town of Alta, an employee said higher water temperatures made fish eat more and grow faster.

So the fishes aren’t dying in the world after all. Oh, well. In related developments, Nathan Goulding discovers an inconvenient fact: “You may not have heard, but the film WordPlay is the only movie on this BoxOfficeMojo chart that’s been out for 4 weeks or longer and has grossed less money than Al Gore’s documentary An Inconvenient Truth.” 

Posted by Tim B. on 07/24/2006 at 09:32 AM
  1. So warm weather is good for living things?

    Shocking.

    Posted by Dave S. on 2006 07 24 at 09:35 AM • permalink

  2. I hearby claim this thread for my own evil purposes, fear me !.

    Posted by Daniel San on 2006 07 24 at 09:35 AM • permalink

  3. Curse you Dave s.!.

    Posted by Daniel San on 2006 07 24 at 09:36 AM • permalink

  4. so, how much does a manbearpig hunting license go for this season?

    Posted by Grimmy on 2006 07 24 at 09:40 AM • permalink

  5. Yes, such great news for the reindeer: They get to be eaten more of! Mother Gaia cries with each tasty bite! Only Jamba Juice and, when necessary, coffee with vanilla ice cream are acceptable food for humans.

    Posted by bobpence on 2006 07 24 at 09:42 AM • permalink

  6. But but but…veggies and fruits cry too! Just because they dont have a face, you think you can just eat em all up?!?

    You!! you!! you!! FACIST!!!

    Posted by Grimmy on 2006 07 24 at 09:44 AM • permalink

  7. “But the permafrost!  Won’t somebody think about the permafrost?!”

    “No. Stop. Think - of - the - polar- bears.”

    It’s hard to take seriously any political opinion that can be animated that badly.

    Posted by richard mcenroe on 2006 07 24 at 09:44 AM • permalink

  8. When (Gaia forbid) the Dem/Labour types are back in charge of our ships of state, I promise, just like the “homeless”, you’ll never hear another word about this global warmingclimate change thing.

    Posted by Vanguard of the Commentariat on 2006 07 24 at 09:54 AM • permalink

  9. umm…hold on a sec there VotC… you sayin, all we gotta do to shut them up is let them pretend to be in charge again?

    Posted by Grimmy on 2006 07 24 at 09:55 AM • permalink

  10. From the NR piece: “[Al Gore gets asked the] same question [he’s] been getting over and over again lately, and to which he always gives the same reply. ‘‘I have no plans to run for president’’ is his answer.”

    At last! On at least one issue, Al Gore is in lock-step with the vast majority of Americans (unless what he really meant was, “Because, as you know, I already am the president”).

    Posted by paco on 2006 07 24 at 11:03 AM • permalink

  11. so, adding “aminess” now too?

    Posted by Grimmy on 2006 07 24 at 11:27 AM • permalink

  12. If there’s anything that jacks me up more than those hunters who shoot Bambi in my local woods every year, it’s Finns who eat Rudolph.  But I digress.

    Has anyone… anyone at all… given a thought to what’s going to happen to Santa’s Workshop when the North Pole finally melts?  I mean, red velvet will be right out as a fashion statement.  Elves in shorts, Mrs. Claus in a sundress?  We might as well all be living in… in… Australia!

    Posted by RebeccaH on 2006 07 24 at 11:28 AM • permalink

  13. We could always get the UN to declare the North Pole a “heat free zone”.
    That should fix that.

    Posted by Grimmy on 2006 07 24 at 11:32 AM • permalink

  14. #11:  Hmmmm. I think I detect a strong indication of “grimminess”.

    Posted by paco on 2006 07 24 at 11:50 AM • permalink

  15. “You may not have heard, but the film WordPlay is the only movie on this BoxOfficeMojo chart that’s been out for 4 weeks or longer and has grossed less money than Al Gore’s documentary An Inconvenient Truth.” 

    So what Nate’s saying is that people are marginally less uninterested in Al Gore’s warnings of global destruction than they are in crossword puzzles.

    That’s called the wisdom of the aggregate.

    Posted by Dave S. on 2006 07 24 at 12:38 PM • permalink

  16. So what Nate’s saying is that people are marginally less uninterested in Al Gore’s warnings of global destruction than they are in crossword puzzles.

    ROFL, Dave!  :-D

    Posted by Barbara Skolaut on 2006 07 24 at 12:42 PM • permalink

  17. So, now innocent reindeer are threatened by the “epidemic of obesity”? Tsk, tsk.

    Takes another melancholy bite of Donderburger.

    Posted by paco on 2006 07 24 at 02:21 PM • permalink

  18. Sure, your fish would be growing stronger too if they had all those drowning polar bears to eat…

    Posted by Vexorg on 2006 07 24 at 02:30 PM • permalink

  19. Norway has a reindeer department? Staff meetings must be insane during rutting season.

    Posted by Gary from Jersey on 2006 07 24 at 02:59 PM • permalink

  20. #19: You said it. I heard that two members of the department locked horns during a contentious budget meeting, couldn’t get untangled, and starved to death.

    Posted by paco on 2006 07 24 at 03:11 PM • permalink

  21. mmmmmmmmmm…...reindeer!

    Posted by The_Real_JeffS on 2006 07 24 at 03:18 PM • permalink

  22. #13 We could always get the UN to declare the North Pole a “heat free zone”.
    That should fix that.


    Grimmy, dear God.  That would mean UN peacekeepers at the North Pole.  The polar bears are already drowning by the twos and threes, and you expect them to watch out for UN peacekeepers too?!?

    Of course, the goats of the world would probably breathe a sigh of relief.

    Posted by RebeccaH on 2006 07 24 at 03:25 PM • permalink

  23. I say that the North Pole is the only place we ought to send UN peacekeepers.  Let them go for the polar bears the way they go after the goats.  The little baby seals (awwwww) will get a break and Justice will be served.  No down side I can see.

    Posted by saltydog on 2006 07 24 at 06:02 PM • permalink

  24. 13. Wont they need gaffa tape for the fairy penguins?

    Posted by thefrollickingmole on 2006 07 24 at 08:13 PM • permalink

  25. No down side I can see.

    I think paco would not be entirely happy about the interference with his P.A.C.O.B.E.A.R. ‘sightseeing’ tours…then again, perhaps there’s a hidden market for peacekeeper-hunting safaris.

    Posted by PW on 2006 07 24 at 08:52 PM • permalink

  26. Good for deer - good for wine growers - I’m thinking grilled venison medallions in Shiraz jus on a bed of garlic-potatoe mash . . . and it isn’t even morning tea time here!!

    Posted by Razor on 2006 07 24 at 09:40 PM • permalink

  27. #24. frollicking, nah, the penguins are in the south pole. They’re laughing.

    Posted by Nilknarf Arbed on 2006 07 24 at 11:16 PM • permalink

  28. Nik
    And they’re next ...

    Cheers

    Posted by J.M. Heinrichs on 2006 07 24 at 11:53 PM • permalink

  29. Equally bad luck to the Aus film Jindabyne which has been quoted as a three stars film only because it is vague,indecisive (in a beautifully filmed way) and the film goes into lecturing mode where caucasian men friends go fishing and do not report the prescence of a body in the area.Of course the body is that of a young indigenous woman and the uncaring caucasian men are cursed because “they wouldn’t of done that if it was a caucasian woman”.

    Posted by crash on 2006 07 25 at 06:32 AM • permalink

  30. #25: Blue helmets for sale!!! $10 a piece; 2 for $17.50!!!

    Posted by paco on 2006 07 25 at 07:55 AM • permalink

  31. Hmm. Reindeer.

    Now I understand why the Dark Lords of teh VRWC wanted the Lewis guns oiled, rather than the new hunting implements. They want to use a traditional hunting implement.

    Sigh. The Paco Industries ‘Gaia-killer MkIV’s’ (the new agent orange emitting plutonium powered backpack hunting flamethrowers, effective to 5,000 yards just for the moonbat season or 5% of your money back) are out of fashion for this season then.

    Damn. They saved all that messy skinning.

    MarkL
    Canberra

    Posted by MarkL on 2006 07 25 at 08:00 AM • permalink

  32. The Paco Industries ‘Gaia-killer MkIV’s’ (the new agent orange emitting plutonium powered backpack hunting flamethrowers, effective to 5,000 yards just for the moonbat season or 5% of your money back) are out of fashion for this season then.

    Damn! Yo, Bob! Call Roy down on the shop floor, tell him to reverse the nozzles on those MkIV’s and sell ‘em to Hizbollah.

    Posted by paco on 2006 07 25 at 08:59 AM • permalink

  33. #25: Blue helmets for sale!!! $10 a piece; 2 for $17.50!!!

    Hardly used, some finish damage from being worn while running back to the helicopter through desperate clawing refugees.

    Posted by richard mcenroe on 2006 07 25 at 10:52 AM • permalink

  34. Isn’t it a little disingenuous to suggest the movie is unsuccessful (financially) when it’s about to become the third most successful documentary of all time?

    I’m just asking.

    Posted by jimmyjojo on 2006 07 26 at 01:42 PM • permalink

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