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CCC BECOMES PPP
Further to the climate change à trois involving Pauline, Phillip, and Patrice, Climate Change Coalition candidate Patrice Newell offers a non-defence defence:
This is a non-story. No one’s ever happy about the order. You can’t please everyone.
But you can please Pauline, which seems to be the aim. Wasn’t Patrice’s partner Phillip - possibly bankrolling the Climate Change Coalition’s vanity TV ads - at one point opposed to the evils of Paulinism? A Google search might turn up some evidence of this. Read on for Climate Change Coalition celebrity Dr Karl Kruszelnicki’s profound views on the Hanson matter. For a climate changeling, Dr Karl holds unusual automotive ideas:
Karl Kruszelnicki rejects the tag of environmental hypocrite and says he drives his V8 Holden Monaro only on the freeway.
His party’s supporters are similarly equipped:
Photographers are unimpressed with the aspiring member for Wentworth Dixie Coulton and her Climate Change Coalition. Coulton denies she gave photographers her OK to attend the coalition launch on Tuesday. Snappers found their way barred by Patrice Newell, who told them she did not want the media there. The coalition website says “Australia is one of the biggest per capita greenhouse gas emitters in the world” and it should know, with at least three gas-guzzling 4WDs and a large Jaguar disgorging guests at property developer Tim Casey’s Rose Bay mansion which was glowing like a beacon. Newell said carbon offsets would be bought to make up for the spotlights.
Hail offsets! Andrew Landeryou was alert to these shenanigans earlier; see also Andrew Bolt for climate change hypocrisy that dwarfs even the CCC’s antics.
Seriously, what is a carbon offset? How can a sane person stand there and make such a ridiculous claim? It’s like some kind of environmental get-out-of-jail-for-free card. Yes, yes, I embezzled $4.2 last year, but I bought enough Perennial Account Canceling Offsets to cover it. So, it’s a moot point.
Unfortunately, my wife found out about my mistress. Fortunately, I purchased a Post-Affair Calamity Offset. We’re having dinner together at the club at 8pm.
Karl Kruszelnicki rejects the tag of environmental hypocrite and says he drives his V8 Holden Monaro only on the freeway.
OK, so far we have the following allowances for environmental wastrelism:
1) Carbon credits
2) Raising awareness
3) Driving on the freewaySo I can buy a Hummer if I slap on some bumper stickers and do my ballin’ on the Turnpike? Awesome. If I replace my lightbulbs with CFLs do I get to run over baby seals?
Really belongs to the previous thread, but hey: you might miss it.
I ambled about the huge office. Marble floors were partially covered by antique oriental rugs. A Chippendale desk (looked like the real McCoy) stood upon its four elegant legs between two windows. A few pieces of African and Pre-Columbian bric-a-brac cluttered a side table. But the main decorative feature was the photographs. You could hardly see the wall for all the pictures of John Kerry. There was even a silver-framed “glamour shot” on the desk – tuxedo clad, hair looking like a well-prepared badger pelt, the smile of a cunning rabbit, the eyes communicating a secret, but desperate, desire to avoid being “found out”. On the wall near the mahogany door was a “Kerry for President” poster, over a small alcove containing what looked, strangely, like a votive candle; and unless my eyes deceived me, that was a prie-dieu facing the poster. The office was a shrine, and its occupant clearly loved John Kerry above – and perhaps to the exclusion of – all other mortals.
“Hello, Paco.” The door closed behind Senator Kerry. “Sorry I’m late. Er, Teresa had me oversee a delivery of tomatoes at her ketchup factory. We, uh, do little things like that for each other.”
Sure, I thought. You count some vegetable inventory, your wife pays for your Senate seat. An equal partnership.
Kerry lumbered over to his desk – after an embarrassed, half-genuflection in the direction of the poster – and sat down, rubbing his hands expectantly.
“Well, Paco, what have you got? Did you get all the dirt on the Swift Vets?”
I started to fish a gasper out of my pocket, but noticed all the sprinkler nozzles in the ceiling. It would keep; this was going to be a short meeting.
“Sure thing, Senator. Here you go.” I pulled a thin folder out of my briefcase and tossed it on the desk. It was so light, it floated down in a series of pendulum-like arcs, like a feather.
Kerry scowled at the folder. “That’s it? That’s all the dirt you could find?”
“Hey, you get what you pay for. That ten G’s only went so far.”
Kerry opened the folder and began reading out loud.
“ ‘John O’Neil. Received a parking ticket in December of 1998. He was double-parked outside of a homeless shelter, where he was delivering food and blankets.’ Hmm. That’s not that bad. Let’s see what else . . . ‘Rear Admiral Roy Hoffmann. Detained for questioning by police, 1999.’ Ah, now we’re getting somewhere! ‘Hoffmann had disarmed and beaten three thugs who had tried to rob an old lady who was confined to a wheel chair.’” Kerry sighed. “This is nothing.”
“True. But I’ll tell you what, John. Another ten grand, and I’ll get you twice as much.”
Kerry struggled futilely to do the math, failed, and dragged out his check book. “Ok, here’s another ten thousand. But don’t cash it until tomorrow; I might need to get Teresa to transfer some money from her account. We . . .”
“Do little things like that for each other. Yeah, I remember.”
#5: Thanks, Rebecca. My theory is that the basis of effective humor is an appreciation of the farcical incongruity embedded in man’s nature. Take Big John. While he possesses a low, dog-like cunning, he is obviously “deficient in the intellectuals”, as an 18th century writer might say, and his aspirations to the highest office in the land are clearly preposterous - yet he almost won, which says something about the farcical incongruity of the rest of us, I suppose.
Wentworth Dixie Coulton? I see the winter of 1865 . . . an early steam ship bound from San Francisco to Australia, carrying a refugee from the defeated Confederacy - Captain Jubal Hezekiah Coulton, late of Mosby’s Rangers . . . his only possessions a threadbare uniform, a pair of cavalry boots, a Navy Colt .36, and a burning desire to lose himself on the far side of the world . . . T’would make a grand story, at that.
Totally OT, sorry:
If you’re a member of facebook, please report this facebook group for promoting terrorism.
http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=5021957426
Thanks
Posted by ThinAndBritish on 2007 11 07 at 02:11 PM • permalinkCCC BECOMES PPP
Is it only me that sees this when “CCC” and “PPP” are so close together?
Posted by The_Real_JeffS on 2007 11 07 at 03:00 PM • permalinkO/T: I received this message from JunkScience.com
JunkScience asks you to vote for ClimateAudit as the “Best Science Blog” in the 2007 Weblog Awards Contest.
ClimateAudit is run by Steve McIntyre, the very deserving co-debunker of the infamous hockey stick graph.
A win by climateAudit would send a message that this anti-climate hysteria movement is not going away, and has teeth. While its just a simple contest, the symbolism would be significant.#2
Like you, I became immediately suspicious of carbon offsets when I realised that their initials formed part of the “PACO” acronym. Still, I’d prefer to see that kind of money blown in a sleazy Tequila bar, than kept in the hands of the CCC’s ilk.
Posted by AlburyShifton on 2007 11 07 at 04:10 PM • permalink#13 - Where the CCC is concerned, they might as well be known as Party of Affluence Carbon Offsets.
Posted by SwinishCapitalist on 2007 11 07 at 04:30 PM • permalinkBOT Habib from the previous “Pauling, Patrice and Phillip” thread, but I encourage more than skimming.
I don’t agree with everything she said (tarriffs, government intervention to solve unemployment etc) but the two main points for which she was pilloried have been repeated enthusiastically on this blog, and more recently throughout society, because they are perfectly sensible:
1. Aborigines enjoy substantial benefit simply on the basis of their race, rather than their circumstances, which is (“reverse”) racism.
2. The majority of Australians have been excluded from any democratically developed immigration policy by the left-wing elites, who have rather imposed multiculturalism on us, and this has the potential to destabilise society.
It is ten years ago now, and many of these things are becoming more and more mainstream so perhaps you don’t see what the fuss was back then. But she was right, and she scared the bejeesus out of the left by having the balls to say so out loud, and she suffered very badly for it. I don’t think that could happen again and blogs like this a part of the reason. Have a closer read.
(And what the hell is wrong with being “populist” in a democracy??)Posted by ooh honey honey on 2007 11 07 at 05:20 PM • permalinkLook out ! Dixie’s as mad as hell and she’s not going to take it anymore
And former dipyaty lawd mayuh of Sydney Town.
Dixie, you’re a dead set Gold Mine.
The Goondiwindi Grey
Further problems for CCC, misled by a leading scientist.
Posted by Margos Maid on 2007 11 07 at 05:49 PM • permalink#2
Texas
It sounds like that to me, too.“I don’t have to stop doing it because I have bought indulgences and so are pardoned from .......”
And the ones who do this are the ones who can afford it*. The rest of the plebs just have to cut back. Turn off the power! Stop driving the car! Don’t use water. Drink recycled. One sheet per feat!
Yeah right, whatever.
*And also have their own little nifty carbon offset
scamscheme going… so they buy from themselves!(And what the hell is wrong with being “populist” in a democracy??)
Nothing…...except that since a “populist” tends to be a supporter of socialism (which is what the original “Populist Party” preached, by and large).
Which, in this blog (and in case you didn’t know), is a big black mark.
Posted by The_Real_JeffS on 2007 11 07 at 06:01 PM • permalinkJimmy Carter came off pretty badly with the rabbit, but he came out on top in his face-off with a cat.
Crouched under his bird feeder (“as usual” !!!) with a shotgun. Weird, weird individual.
Which, in this blog (and in case you didn’t know), is a big black mark.
I had actually picked that up.
Some populations, on occasion, have to find out to their eventual misery that socialism doesn’t work (see Venezuela). But still, each of us ought to be free to think, whatever we want, however wrong or objectionable it may be, and in a democracy we should all be free to guess how many other like-minded geniuses or dickheads there are, put our hand up and say “I can represent you if you want to vote for me”. She did that and was vilified atrociously, by all the people that this blog regularly criticises.Posted by ooh honey honey on 2007 11 07 at 06:19 PM • permalinkBut still, each of us ought to be free to think, whatever we want, however wrong or objectionable it may be, and in a democracy we should all be free to guess how many other like-minded geniuses or dickheads there are, put our hand up and say “I can represent you if you want to vote for me”. She did that and was vilified atrociously, by all the people that this blog regularly criticises.
Freedom of speech works both ways, OHH. Pauline was/is free to speak her mind, and so is Habib. Or you. Or me.
But there’s no law that I’ve ever read about (in a free society, that is) which says everyone has to: (a) like what’s being said; (b) accept what’s being said at face value; and (c) withhold opinions if the speaker’s feelings might be hurt. Common courtesy dictates that we be polite about this, but that’s about it.
And vilification of public figures has been around for as long as we’ve had governments, so it’s not like Pauline should be surprised at the vigor of which some opinions are expressed.
All of which is common sense….which only goes to show that sense is not so common as we would like to see.
Posted by The_Real_JeffS on 2007 11 07 at 06:44 PM • permalinkUmmmm, Paco. Don’t EVER screw around in Norfolk, VA
OH…The Paco Detective Agency has narrowed “Sybil” down to three.
Which of the three would have the dead
puscat?Weird, weird individual.
I agree, but not because he tried to “sting” a cat with a shotgun*....I’d figured that out a long time ago, for other reasons.
=================================
*: Yeah, right, Jimmah. Now pull the other one.Posted by The_Real_JeffS on 2007 11 07 at 06:46 PM • permalinkOh dear Dr “Gobbels” Krustinikers the respected scientist made a small boo-boo in his claims on CO2 geosequestration.
Because he relied on info from the first edition of Dr Flim Flannerys “the weather makers”.
Close to a Blairs law moment but not quite.Posted by thefrollickingmole on 2007 11 07 at 07:50 PM • permalink#22 MM
Great fisk.
Auntie’s/CCC’s resident celebrity physicist, Dr Karl, relies on a populist book authored by a mammalogist/palaeontologist, Tim Flannery, for his research?
Dummer than I thought.Coal’s the agenda for
Pattythe CCC.
It’s the key platform.Patty & Phatty are supreme NIMBYs, who object to expanding coal mining in the Hunter Valley, their farm’s backyard.
This is highly arrogant, considering that their propaganda states that the Hunter Valley is ‘the world’s largest coal exporting port’.*Why don’t you move your cattle farm further up the coast, say to the Coffs Harbour hinterland, Phatty?
Oh, that’s right, you’ve signed a 3-year contract with ABC and commute to its Sydney studios from the Hunter Valley - so much for fossil fuel consumption, eh?
Coffs Harbour would justconsume too much fossil fuelbe too far to drive.
Frauds being exposed for what they are.*As mentioned previously in this blog, the global coal export market is only a fraction of that consumed, even our largest coal trading partner, China, is largely self sufficient.
I own a V8 Monaro but only drive it on the highway ... I went to Scores but didn’t see any strippers - same PR agency?
Agenda.
Have Patty and Phatty conned this geek to support their ‘cause’, who’s already shot himself in the foot twice at least?The use of carbon credits give a terrible example. It’s basically an indulgence affordable by the rich. So what does that say? If you’re rich you can live whatever extravagant CO2 producing lifestyle you want? But if you’re not, you have to live like a 10th century monk or you’re evil? Where is the fairness and equality in that?
Those that say we must all cut back on activities that produce greenhouse gasses must do exactly that. Cut back on all activities that produce greenhouse gasses. Or else they’re nothing but hypocrites and poseurs.
You can tell them wronwright says that. That and that they’re a bunch of fuckwits.
Posted by wronwright on 2007 11 07 at 08:37 PM • permalinkFrom frollicking’s link, Dr Karl:
We’re stuck with the fact that we have still got to make electricity in the short term from carbon of some sort
But within 20 years or so, we’ll discover a revolutionary new form of energy affordable for all peoples and nations of the world.
Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to continue my electoral campaign. The seat of Fairyland might be up for grabs.
#36 Dminor: What was wrong with “clarfied”? That’s the way we say it back in the hill country (“This h’year jar a moonshine done clarfied real nice! Cain’t hardly even see no more bird sh*t innit!”)
#37: You can tell them wronwright says that. That and that they’re a bunch of fuckwits.
On telephone:
“Yeah, well, Wronwright says to tell you that, so I’m just passing it along. What? Ok, I’ll give him the message.” Hangs up telephone and hollers out
“Hey, Wronwright! Nicole Kidman says that weekend in Martinique is definitely off.”
I have 3 4WD’s which guzzle 8.5 l/100, 9.0 l/100 and 9.2 l/100 each. Better fuel consumption than many 2WDs, but ‘economical’ or ‘environmentally-conscious’ 4WD doesn’t have the right flavour of hatred, does it.
I’m puzzled how Dr. Karl manages to get home if he only drives his Monaro on the freeway. Maybe he lives there.
Hey! kae!
I hate that use of “partner” too. Too much guesswork involved and all because some people got all lefty-sensitive about the words “husband” and “wife”.
Your partner? What sort of partner? Bridge partner? Business partner? Tennis doubles partner? Joint venture partner? Oohhh! The person you have sex with!
Well, that would sound funny in introductions. “Jane, I’d like you to meet my sex partner Dick. Dick, Jane.”
Patrice’s
partnerdefacto husband PhillipThere! Much more informative!
Janice,
Just calling them their Husband or Wife would be enough, boyf or girlf.Especially awkward when introduced to “partner” of person you don’t know is
queergay (not that there’s anything wrong with that), but is this person a “partner/lover” or just a business partner?I suppose it’s not important, but it kind of is if you are trying to make small talk. You’d certainly not finish a toast with the “No Poofters” line. (I have really bad foot-in-mouth.)
#43
I wish I had one of those.kae,
A while ago I was talking to this fellow and mentioned the woman with whom he lives and who is the mother of his children. They don’t use the same surnames, but who knows what that means these days.
Anway, I referred to her as his wife. He said, all indignantly, “She’s not my wife!” and I thought to myself, “Why? Don’t you like her enough for that?”
It’s the weird, self-righteous posturing that gets to me. He likes her enough to have lived with her for many years, likes her enough to have had children with her and to have stuck around subsequently, and likes her enough to run a business with her in which her contribution is vital. But he doesn’t like her enough to want to claim her for his own and call her his wife let alone to actually marry her. And somehow he’s convinced himself that that’s a Good Thing for both her and him.Stupid young girls these days! I told my husband that if he wanted to live with me he’d have to marry me. That sorts the boys who just want to play from the real men!
As for your struck-outs, what can I say? Good men are hard to find.
As for your struck-outs, what can I say? Good men are hard to find.
They’re job lots, aren’t they!
Also, vice-versa.
As for the rest of your story. Why doesn’t he call her his wife, she is in all respects his “common law” wife. Even if they’re not married. You’re right, it’s really annoying. She’s good enough to sleep with, wake up with, have kids with, look after you, but you can’t even call her your wife? (Who gives a rats if you’re not married… though your point about getting married is very good, my thoughts go to the old joke, “if you just want a little pork now and then, why take the whole pig”?)
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Patrice & Phil would have been happy on the farm today. Max of 18, lots of rain, very global cooling for November. Heater has been alight in our house.