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Aieeee! Hezbollah is attacking us!

(Via Bernie Slattery)

UPDATE. The Reuters version.

Posted by Tim B. on 08/21/2006 at 11:25 PM
  1. Pretty lame Hezbollah, pretty lame.

    Posted by Daniel San on 2006 08 21 at 11:46 PM • permalink

  2. No Daniel, I think its priceless.  Its difficult to find mirth in the present (or any) conflict, but this effort is better than Monty Python.

    Er, did anyone say “Reuters” ?

    Posted by Stop Continental Drift! on 2006 08 21 at 11:52 PM • permalink

  3. Of topic, but on:  Go to Google.  Type in “failure.”  then Type in “liar.”
    Bastards
    (hat tip, Gateway Pundit.)

    Posted by heather on 2006 08 21 at 11:52 PM • permalink

  4. How dare they steel our intellectual property rights!

    But they do have form, as they were caught using the British (Biggles?) night goggles!

    Posted by WeekByWeek on 2006 08 21 at 11:55 PM • permalink

  5. WTF!?!??!  You have got to be kidding me.

    No, you’re not.

    Lame ain’t the word, Daniel.  Pathetic is better.

    Posted by The_Real_JeffS on 2006 08 21 at 11:58 PM • permalink

  6. RE #3, that’s OK, heather.  Google “failure liar”, sans quotes.  Sez it all.

    Posted by The_Real_JeffS on 2006 08 22 at 12:01 AM • permalink

  7. Blind Freddy can see that boat has a broken back.  You cant do that to a boat that size with any missle I know of.  Anti shipping missles typically strike at or near the water line on the side of a boat, creating a big hole that starts a heavy list, usually sinking the boat.  (Think USS Cole, 10 or 12 feet lower)

    Torpedos on the other hand are designed (these days) to detonate about 5-10 metres UNDER the hull of a ship.  This causes a huge hole in the water that cannot support the ships weight.  With the front and back of the boat still on water, the ships own weight breaks it in two.

    Also notice the smooth decks with all weapons and equipment removed. 

    Reuters would be so proud…

    Posted by The_Wizard_of_WOZ on 2006 08 22 at 12:10 AM • permalink

  8. Missile.  I can spell, I swear…

    Posted by The_Wizard_of_WOZ on 2006 08 22 at 12:11 AM • permalink

  9. lol, talk about putting lipstick on a camel.

    Posted by daza on 2006 08 22 at 12:32 AM • permalink

  10. Bernie Slattery nailed the bottom-scraping Phil Adams yet again. As usual, Adams has vented his spleen on Mark Steyn - a journalist of distinction that the grub Adams would not be worthy of tying his shoelaces. Read it here and try not to vomit.

    Posted by Bonmot on 2006 08 22 at 12:32 AM • permalink

  11. Mmmmm, Mk48 torpedoes give me a boner. 

    Be that as it may, they are exactly the sort of technology that the corrupt, moribund caliphaptes of the region could never produce themselves.

    Can’t these losers even see the reference lines painted on the hull?

    Posted by Apparatchik on 2006 08 22 at 12:34 AM • permalink

  12. If they’re gonna tell whoppers, why not go the whole hog and take a scene out of one of the movies of the Titanic sinking… 

    That would look even more impressive, and the duped ignoramuses of the middle east would lap it up!!!

    Posted by casanova on 2006 08 22 at 12:47 AM • permalink

  13. I reckon you could Photoshop the Japanese surrender on board the USS Missouri to look like the Israelis surrendering to Hezbollah. Just add robes, a bit of headgear, a few beards. Easy.

    Change some of the people into the Jewish uniforms from the concentration camps and you’re done. If I get time I’ll have a go myself…

    Posted by Bonmot on 2006 08 22 at 12:56 AM • permalink

  14. This is easy enough to refute. First we park a target prepped target ship, just like the one in the video, off the coast of Lebanon.
    Then we invite all the journos and the hezzie leaders on board to watch, first hand a torpedo strike.

    That’d convince em all.

    When all else fails, practical application demonstrations.

    Posted by Grimmy on 2006 08 22 at 01:09 AM • permalink

  15. And here’s the Reuters Version...

    Posted by Dan Lewis on 2006 08 22 at 01:14 AM • permalink

  16. Pity that that old lebanese duck which keeps showing up in all the propaganda shots is so hard on the eyes…  Makes the whole doctored pictures effort seem even more offensive….

    Posted by casanova on 2006 08 22 at 01:21 AM • permalink

  17. #15 Dan Lewis:

    It was a house boat!! ok, that changes everything!

    Posted by Grimmy on 2006 08 22 at 01:21 AM • permalink

  18. “failure liar” has a new poster child as of today

    Posted by MentalFloss on 2006 08 22 at 01:27 AM • permalink

  19. That pic will be believed all over the islamic world, after all if they believe in islam they will believe anything.

    Posted by phillip on 2006 08 22 at 01:39 AM • permalink

  20. Yes, it is lame, but their viewers are so drunk on hate, any image will do.

    Posted by Patricia on 2006 08 22 at 01:48 AM • permalink

  21. Is Terry “HMAS Torrens” Lane on to this yet?

    Posted by Whale Spinor on 2006 08 22 at 01:59 AM • permalink

  22. #20 Patricia:

    I suspect it has more to do with around 1400 years of having anyone capable of independent thinking removed from the gene pool.

    I honestly do not believe that the islamic culture can produce folk that are capable of any real critical thought, except on those rare occasions that do more to prove the concept of mutation.

    Posted by Grimmy on 2006 08 22 at 02:10 AM • permalink

  23. Dan - nice use of the unsinkable Flat Fatima!

    —Nora

    Posted by The Thin Man Returns on 2006 08 22 at 02:20 AM • permalink

  24. Dan (#15)- beautifully done!

    Flat Fatima, the poster girl for the Hezbollah Navy!

    Posted by Pedro the Ignorant on 2006 08 22 at 02:49 AM • permalink

  25. Phat Phil consumed by relevance deprivation syndrome?! thats gonna take some digesting

    Posted by larrikin on 2006 08 22 at 02:55 AM • permalink

  26. Dan- the life jacket was classic. No longer a Mae West.It’s now the Fatima vest.

    Posted by Spag_oz on 2006 08 22 at 04:05 AM • permalink

  27. But the standard middle eastern peasant episcopalian will buy it

    Posted by Wimpy Canadian on 2006 08 22 at 04:06 AM • permalink

  28. Somebody should forward it to Reuters to see if they use it.

    BTW Dan, that photoshop was phucking hilarious.

    Posted by murph on 2006 08 22 at 04:10 AM • permalink

  29. Here are some pictures for hisbollocks to steal.

    Posted by kae on 2006 08 22 at 04:14 AM • permalink

  30. #26

    Dan- the life jacket was classic.

    Life jacket? That was a dayglo bomb-belt.

    Posted by Dan Lewis on 2006 08 22 at 04:51 AM • permalink

  31. #15 Dan Lewis,
    ROFL!, even my cat is laughing.

    Posted by Daniel San on 2006 08 22 at 05:11 AM • permalink

  32. #15: Dan, that was great!

    Posted by paco on 2006 08 22 at 08:25 AM • permalink

  33. Ah, but was that just a Hezbollah plant to make you THINK they’re not blowing up Oz warships? Clearly, we need to kill them all just to be on the safe side.

    Posted by SoberHT on 2006 08 22 at 08:52 AM • permalink

  34. could this be related to weathergirl

    Posted by drscroogemcduck on 2006 08 22 at 09:01 AM • permalink

  35. I wish every time some Islamolovin’ greasejob pulls this kind of stunt, our military would box up a barnload of leaflets demonstrating exactly what they’ve done to the truth and drop them all over the Middle East.  The MOMEAs love to believe propaganda by their own, but they are also perfectly aware of what liars they all are.

    Posted by RebeccaH on 2006 08 22 at 10:46 AM • permalink

  36. #22 The despots and the Islamists have been killing any reasonable person for centuries, and the decent people have emigrated—I think your theory is spot on.

    Posted by Patricia on 2006 08 22 at 01:21 PM • permalink

  37. That poor lady. First she lost her 12 homes, and now her boat.

    Posted by Veeshir on 2006 08 22 at 02:08 PM • permalink

  38. Are you sure it’s not the good French ship “Tête de UNIFIL”?

    Posted by andycanuck on 2006 08 22 at 04:25 PM • permalink

  39. You guys crack me up! My face hurts and I think I’ve drooled into my keyboard.

    Posted by texasred on 2006 08 22 at 06:02 PM • permalink

  40. #29, kae - Super cool site!

    Posted by Bruce Lagasse on 2006 08 22 at 07:37 PM • permalink

  41. Reuters is now the new Islamic News Wire Service.

    (Do they get funded by Hezzee bol-air?)

    Sing song time.. For England as is appears to be Islamic now..unless they start acting upon it..1,2,3.

    Rule Islamics!
    Islamics now rule the waves.
    Islamic Britain never, never, never shall be slaves.

    The nations, not so blest as thee,
    Must in their turn, to tyrants fall,
    Must in ,must in, must in their turn, to tyrants fall,
    While thou shalt flourish, shalt flourish great and free,
    The dread and envy of them all.

    Rule Britannia!
    Britannia rule the waves. Britons never, never, never shall be slaves.


    I think they are now.. sorry England you are.

    Posted by 1.618 on 2006 08 22 at 11:29 PM • permalink

  42. 1.618

    Oh it’s now in Daar-E-Salaam alright.  Britain is now a nation of cowering Dhimmis.

    The mere thought that a decadent Western infidel, Darrell Hair, should accuse pious, pure Muslims of cheating at cricket has thrown the British media and establishment into an orgy of self-flagellation and faux-outrage in solidarity with their new Islamic masters.

    Posted by murph on 2006 08 23 at 04:41 AM • permalink

  43. I think you mean “Dar al Islam” murph.

    Dar al-Islam (Arabic: دار الإسلام literally house of submission) is a term used to refer to those lands under Muslim government(s). In the conservative tradition of Islam the world is divided into two components: dar al-Islam, the house of submission and dar al-Harb, the house of war.

    Dar es Salaam (Arabic: دار السلام‎ [translation: “Abode of Peace”] Dār as-Salām), on the other hand, is the largest city in Tanzania.

    Posted by MentalFloss on 2006 08 23 at 05:21 AM • permalink

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