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ALL SUNLIGHT EATEN

Having alerted us to boat-munching seas that devour all marine craft, the Sydney Morning Herald now draws attention to a monster so hungry it will eat all the sunlight.

(Check the above link; that’s the actual SMH headline on a story about the shadow to be cast—mostly over water—by proposed harbourside structures.)

Posted by Tim B. on 11/02/2006 at 11:49 AM
  1. Isn’t this a good thing, though?  I thought global warming was caused by too much sunlight.  So sunlight munching must be a good thing.

    Posted by rbj1 on 2006 11 02 at 11:54 AM • permalink

  2. “It will eat all the sunlight”? Geez, is the SMH now trolling for new subscribers with an Islamic (read: 11th century) understanding of science?

    Posted by PW on 2006 11 02 at 12:09 PM • permalink

  3. I don’t know about Australia, having never been there, but in the US, when the sun moves from one part of the sky to the next, the shadows sort of shift from one side of a building to the other side.  Sometimes, like at midday, there’s hardly any shadow at all.

    Posted by RebeccaH on 2006 11 02 at 12:09 PM • permalink

  4. I know, I know, we Yanks think we have to one-up everybody, having moveable shadows and all, but you know, technology marches on.

    Posted by RebeccaH on 2006 11 02 at 12:11 PM • permalink

  5. Maybe that’s just Phil Adams out for a stroll.

    Posted by paco on 2006 11 02 at 12:12 PM • permalink

  6. Neither the buildings nor shadows will be as large as the Herald claims.  Looking at the picture they have, it seems no one on the design team has taken into account the rising Sydney sea levels. I’m most surprised the paper didn’t pick that up.

    Posted by ErnestBludger on 2006 11 02 at 12:26 PM • permalink

  7. Where’s Steve McQueen when you need him?

    Posted by The_Real_JeffS on 2006 11 02 at 12:45 PM • permalink

  8. a monster so hungry it will eat all the sunlight.

    A maw that could swallow a dozen starships!

    /cmdr decker

    Posted by Spiny Norman on 2006 11 02 at 12:46 PM • permalink

  9. Rebecca: I believe the whole concept of movable shadows is classified information. Remember: ooselay ipslay inksay ipsshay.

    Posted by paco on 2006 11 02 at 12:49 PM • permalink

  10. In an earlier Globular Wormening thread, I mentioned the Wikipedia article on Niagara Falls that blamed view-blocking mist on Gluteal Wartening. Well, that was just one explanation offered. The other was altered airflow because of high-rise construction on the Canadian side.

    Not surprising that the Gloobal Worfing crowd and the tower-phobics intersect. If there’s one thing I’m learning, it’s that “progressives” hate progress.

    Posted by Dave S. on 2006 11 02 at 01:03 PM • permalink

  11. Fortunately the damage is limited by earth curvature.

    Posted by rhhardin on 2006 11 02 at 01:04 PM • permalink

  12. #9, Oops!  *zips lips and throws away the key*

    Posted by RebeccaH on 2006 11 02 at 01:07 PM • permalink

  13. Solzilla vs Shadowra!  Own it on DVD, Tuesday!

    Posted by RebeccaH on 2006 11 02 at 01:17 PM • permalink

  14. This is classic magical thinking, of the sort that Carl Sagan warned against as the opposite of science and reason.

    Of course, the Woeful Gormening crowd regard themselves as in sole possession of scientific “fact” here, even if it was gotten from a Guardian article, or an Al Gore movie, so trying to point this out to them is utterly futile…

    Posted by rick mcginnis on 2006 11 02 at 02:36 PM • permalink

  15. Is Beazley eating sunlight now too?

    Posted by curious george on 2006 11 02 at 03:05 PM • permalink

  16. Fortunately the damage is limited by earth curvature.

    Posted by rhhardin

    That about sums it up!

    Posted by Major John on 2006 11 02 at 03:27 PM • permalink

  17. Who cares if there’s a bit of a shadow in Sydney? The Northern Territory government has announced it’s introducing speed limits! That really is the end of the world as we know it.

    Posted by Jack Lacton on 2006 11 02 at 04:41 PM • permalink

  18. Don’t you know that Shadows are the second worst threat to The Planet TM, after rising sea levels? And that shadows cast by submerged waterside buildings are the scariest of all?

    And you people worry about terrorism!

    Posted by arrowhead ripper on 2006 11 02 at 05:13 PM • permalink

  19. Fran did a really servile interview with Oracle Stern.  She had no notes all about critical responses to him even after a week of exposure. 
    Stern was allowed to predict a 5 degree global temp increase, which is the most extreme and unlikely figure - but he’s NOT extreme?

    Stern also used the absurd point about deaths from heat stress in 40 years in Europe.  Doesn’t Fran know that Europeans survive worse than that every year in the US and Australia? 

    Un-bloody-believable dumb worship by the ABC,
    But as Homer would say ‘But.. Waddayagunnadoo.’

    Posted by Barrie on 2006 11 02 at 05:38 PM • permalink

  20. Stern also used the absurd point about deaths from heat stress in 40 years in Europe.  Doesn’t Fran know that Europeans survive worse than that every year in the US and Australia? 

    To a European, US and Australian citizens are not European, regardless of their ancestry. Apparently being born on non-European soil somehow changes the genes.

    Toughens them, most likely.

    Posted by Rob Crawford on 2006 11 02 at 05:59 PM • permalink

  21. It’s Friday, it’s rabbit pie day or Islamic pie day sing song time! Yeehaaaaa

    Posted by 1.618 on 2006 11 02 at 06:21 PM • permalink

  22. It’s Friday! It’s sing song day! Grab your mike and sing along to the song!

    It’s Islamic pie day song time!!!

    On the farm, the sheik is resting
    Cause there’s no, Islamic protesting
    So, every Friday that ever comes along,
    The sheik gets up early to sing this little song

    Run woman - run woman - Run! Run! Run!
    Don’t let the sheik have his fun! Fun! Fun!
    I’ll get by cause I enjoy my “covered” pies
    so run sheikee, run sheikeee, run run run

    Run woman - run woman - Run! Run! Run!
    Run woman - run woman - Run! Run! Run!
    Meat! meat! Meat! Meat!
    Says the islamic dumb dumb sheik.
    Run, woman, run, woman, run run run.

    Posted by 1.618 on 2006 11 02 at 06:22 PM • permalink

  23. Do these people understand what “hyperbole” means?  Never mind, they obviously don’t.

    As for the overheated Europeans:  Hell, those folks couldn’t handle a plain ol’ heat wave, burying over 12,000 of their kind.  The only thing that may save them is the fact that by the time all this comes about, the more robust new Europeans, i.e., the Muslims, most of whom hale from warmer climes, won’t have any problems with it.

    Posted by saltydog on 2006 11 02 at 06:31 PM • permalink

  24. If they could just build their skyscrapers on the Great Barrier Reef.

    Posted by kae on 2006 11 02 at 06:39 PM • permalink

  25. This is a serious scare campaign. For those of you not in Sydney, one look at this picture makes the following obvious:

    This is the worst-case shadow diagram for a few hours on the morning on the Winter Solstice, when the sun rises to furthest to the North-East. The shadows cast are long and to the South-West. You can see the shadows here: http://tinyurl.com/wm8e4

    Have a look at the various shadow diagrams here: http://www.eastdarlingharbour.com/ConceptPlan.cfm and you can see that the SMH has chosen the most dramatic, sinister shadow to adorn their front page.

    For the vast bulk of the year, including most hours when normal people might go near the joint, there will be plenty of sun. Problem shadows in my view, if any, will be cast towards the East when the sun moves into the Western part of the sky.

    What a beat up.

    Posted by spaniel on 2006 11 02 at 07:22 PM • permalink

  26. Hey, paco! wronwright is talking about you!


    Good, now while they’re busy, I have a deal for you Aussies.

    For a measly $10 billion bucks (that’s billion with a B and bucks as in US dollars) I’ll sell you the secrets to self mobile shadows that react in counter to the changes in the sun’s position in the sky.

    It works. Honest. Go to any desert in the US and watch our cactus shadows.

    This is a self maintaining upgrade to your already existing shadow structure. No further muss or fuss once the install process is completed.

    And, just think of the potential income from increased tourism! Everyone will be flocking to your shores on their vacations to see the new Aussie shadow system. Why, your investment will be returned 100 fold in less time than it takes to pass tax lowering legislation!

    Posted by Grimmy on 2006 11 02 at 08:17 PM • permalink

  27. #14, your comment

    Of course, the Woeful Gormening crowd regard themselves as in sole possession of scientific “fact” here, even if it was gotten from a Guardian article, or an Al Gore movie, so trying to point this out to them is utterly futile…

    is so true.  Channel 7’s Sunrise is running a campaign on this issue and the presenter was sledging a sceptical Government backbencher, saying “what would he know, hasn’t he seen Al Gore’s movie?”  The backbencher was a research scientist at CSIRO and the Defence Science and Technology Organisation before entering Parliament.

    Posted by craigo on 2006 11 02 at 08:18 PM • permalink

  28. OK, what’s happening?  I did a preview before submitting and the text has now gone small.

    Posted by craigo on 2006 11 02 at 08:22 PM • permalink

  29. This is all part of the secret neocon strategy to control global warmening. 

    The buildings absorb solar energy that would otherwise strike the surface of the ground and water.

    The structure of the buildings channels the heat deep underground through simple conductance to their foundations.

    Soon, the neocons will control this vast store of solar heat and can direct it as we they will!

    BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA *cough*

    Posted by richard mcenroe on 2006 11 02 at 09:11 PM • permalink

  30. Omigod,

    We are all doomed! We are all going to die!

    Posted by Wimpy Canadian on 2006 11 02 at 09:14 PM • permalink

  31. #3 rebeccaH, you should go to Oz, then you will understand that Physics is not the same planetwide. Downunder, light moves TOWARDS the source, and it is HOTTER in the shade.

    And readers of the New York Times Sydney Morning Herald believe what htey are told.

    Posted by Wimpy Canadian on 2006 11 02 at 09:17 PM • permalink

  32. #9 Paco, even I can understand your Hispanic code:  Loose lips sinks ships.

    Posted by Wimpy Canadian on 2006 11 02 at 09:21 PM • permalink

  33. #17 Bloody hell. I am heading there this January. Does this mean I’ll get a speeding ticket 400 km from nowhere on a dead straight road in the middle of nowhere-else?

    Posted by Wimpy Canadian on 2006 11 02 at 09:26 PM • permalink

  34. #18 Bonjour triteness,

    I have experience of shadows caste underwater by submerged edifices and I can assure you that they are a conspiracy of the laws of nature.

    I ask you, who made these so-called laws? They are just a subjective blahblahblah.

    Fortunately, the left cannot actually repeal laws of nature and it is really dark underwater in the shadow of a submerged edifice.

    Posted by Wimpy Canadian on 2006 11 02 at 09:30 PM • permalink

  35. #22 It’s Friday! It’s crackerjack!

    Posted by Wimpy Canadian on 2006 11 02 at 09:34 PM • permalink

  36. I blame the shadows on the Sun.

    Frankly Spaniel, what’s the big deal (not directed at you). It know this part of the port, it is nowhere anyone without a commercial boat would go anyway.

    We are all doomed! We are all going to die!

    Damn shadows. Damn Sun.

    Posted by Wimpy Canadian on 2006 11 02 at 09:39 PM • permalink

  37. #26: Prepare for hostile takeover!

    #32: Dang! You’ve broken “Enigma”.

    Posted by paco on 2006 11 02 at 09:45 PM • permalink

  38. #14 rick mcginnis

    Of course, the Woeful Gormening crowd regard themselves as in sole possession of scientific “fact” here, even if it was gotten from a Guardian article, or an Al Gore movie, so trying to point this out to them is utterly futile…

    That is classic.

    Bravo!

    Posted by Spiny Norman on 2006 11 02 at 11:24 PM • permalink

  39. I don’t know much about Australian geography, what with it being all upside-down and backwards and requiring a conversion facor of 5/9 after adding 32, or of 9/5 before subtracting 32, and still being wrong, but…

    ... is this anywhere near the Great Barrier Reef, where they’re talking about a “shade cloth” to colonialist tourism or imperial organisms or hegemonic divers from global contra-seasonal sinusoidal climate change? Because, you know, you can maybe kill two birds with one stone.

    Dame, PETA just burst into my office and are about to waterboard me.

    Posted by bobpence on 2006 11 03 at 10:53 AM • permalink

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