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ALASKA FLANNERIZED

Just like Al Gore, Australian tilty exaggerologist Tim Flannery also possesses magical cooling powers:

The Australian scientist and author told a class of geography students at the University of Alaska Fairbanks on Monday that little actions by individuals would make a big difference toward creating the change needed to stem the tide of global warming.

Flannery spoke at Fairbanks on March 12 ... during a time of historic coldening:

The period from Feb. 12 to March 20 was the coldest on record ...

Via Lubos Motl, who is alert to Flannery’s flantastic flascism:

I should tell you that in his book “The Weather Makers”, page 291, the author proposes that “humans” have no other choice than to establish a global military junta that he calls Earth Commission for Thermostatic Control unless all demands to regulate carbon are met by the people of this planet.

• Flannery wants to establish an Earth Commission for Thermostatic Control.

• Flannery wants to establish a city called Geothemia.

• Flannery - the 2007 Australian of the Year - wants some serious work on that bitch of a messiah complex he’s dealing with.

Posted by Tim B. on 04/08/2007 at 12:30 PM
  1. Sieg Heil!

    All power to the weather nazis.  We can only hope they will use carbon-neutral power to operate their death chambers and crematoria.

    Posted by Mystery Meat on 2007 04 08 at 12:38 PM • permalink

  2. Cripes.

    Posted by Tungsten Monk on 2007 04 08 at 12:45 PM • permalink

  3. I’m passing around the hat to collect donations, so I can afford to buy heaters for all those people who will be affected by Tim Flannery’s travel itinerary and weather altering behaviour.

    As an Australian, I feel it’s my duty to apologise to everyone affected by his behaviour. Donations can be forwarded to the VRWC Treasury Department.

    Posted by Ash_ on 2007 04 08 at 12:53 PM • permalink

  4. Sieg Heil!  And snow and ice and sleet and rain and… oh, sorry, thought this was a Gore appearance…

    Posted by richard mcenroe on 2007 04 08 at 01:07 PM • permalink

  5. I wonder if the Goracle bestows the powers of cooling upon the apostles he deems worthy of promoting his message, or if they develop said powers independently through intensive study and meditation upon the mysteries of the Gaiaspel.

    Posted by Blue State Sil on 2007 04 08 at 01:08 PM • permalink

  6. The fucking Earth Commission for Thermostatic Control.

    I have always ruined greenies’ Global Warmening diatribes by saying:

    “Well, OK, suppose you are right.  Two questions: One, what temperature should the Earth be set at, and two, who gets to control the thermostat?”

    The smarter ones shut up at that point.

    Now Flummery is proposing a fucking Earth Commission for Thermostatic Control.

    This is serious madness.

    Posted by Kaboom on 2007 04 08 at 01:09 PM • permalink

  7. Come on now, people.  You do realize that colder than normal temperatures is also an effect of gorebal whinering.
    Temperatures above normal = GW
    temperatures below normal = GW

    Posted by rbj1 on 2007 04 08 at 01:23 PM • permalink

  8. Y’know, Fairbanks is pretty much in the middle of a howling wilderness.  It’s too bad that Flannery didn’t step outside the city limits for a short commune with Mother Gaia™.....them Alaskan wolves are pretty hungry this time of year!

    Posted by The_Real_JeffS on 2007 04 08 at 01:59 PM • permalink

  9. The_ Real_JeffS—Come on, man, you’re indulging in rampant lupophobia here.  After all, as Terry Pratchett has pointed out, there is no record of any lonely traveler ever stumbling out of a cold winter wood and reporting he’d been attacked by a pack of wolves…

    Posted by richard mcenroe on 2007 04 08 at 02:18 PM • permalink

  10. Someone’s beaten Flannery to the punch.

    Posted by Paul Zrimsek on 2007 04 08 at 03:47 PM • permalink

  11. The Corner is trying to disprove the Gore effect with a picture of snow at a place Gore hasn’t been in a while.

    Posted by 68W40 on 2007 04 08 at 04:30 PM • permalink

  12. 91B30: hahahahahahah!

    Posted by Andrea Harris, Administrator on 2007 04 08 at 04:47 PM • permalink

  13. Just out of curiosity has anyone considered just how effective a carbon neutral military junta would be at imposing its will on the rest of the world?

    Posted by Harry Buttle on 2007 04 08 at 05:20 PM • permalink

  14. #13 HB:

    You might ask the Mguabe government in Zimbabwe. Not sure they’re intentionally carbon neutral, but for all practical purposes it would look like that mixed with the Chinese Cultural Revolution.

    Posted by brett_l on 2007 04 08 at 05:31 PM • permalink

  15. “rampant lupophobia”?  Not at all, richard!  If the wolves are fed, there is no need to cull them.

    Posted by The_Real_JeffS on 2007 04 08 at 05:49 PM • permalink

  16. Flannery’s weather-nazis: they put the ‘storm’ in ‘stormtrooper’; it’ll be a thousand-year ‘rain’!  They’re already working on the uniforms: something with epaulettes and shoulder-flashes, and a riding-crop.

    Posted by cuckoo on 2007 04 08 at 07:27 PM • permalink

  17. They’re already working on the uniforms: something with epaulettes and shoulder-flashes, and a riding-crop.

    And that’s just the sleepwear!

    Posted by Rob Crawford on 2007 04 08 at 08:17 PM • permalink

  18. Earth Commission for Thermostatic Control? Geothermia? All sounds like a sci-fi plot.

    Tim Flannery might be on the way to becoming another L.Ron Hubbard. How far away is the church of Geothematology. Or maybe is he the next Reverend Jim Jones? Will he lead his followers a paradise on earth that will draw its energy from the earth’s core. Don’t drink the Kool-Aid!!!!

    Posted by Contrail on 2007 04 08 at 08:38 PM • permalink

  19. World’s leading paleontologist on global climate ‘Thermostatic Control’?

    I’m Flannergassed!

    Posted by egg_ on 2007 04 08 at 09:06 PM • permalink

  20. Tim Blair: you said “Just like Al Gore, Australian tilty exaggerologist Tim Flannery also possesses magical cooling powers…” but failed to mention that he has also singlehandedly reversed sea level rise, so islands across the South Pacific are now 3 metres higher above sea level than they were last week. Give credit where it’s due!

    Posted by Tim Curtin on 2007 04 08 at 09:11 PM • permalink

  21. As usual, leftoids are remarkably in thrall with the idea of an all-powerful military if it’s going to be under their control…

    Posted by PW on 2007 04 08 at 10:31 PM • permalink

  22. Flannery reminds me more and more of Lafayette Ronald Hubbard.

    Posted by Hanyu on 2007 04 08 at 10:37 PM • permalink

  23. Hey, Contrail (#18): didn’t see your comment before I posted.

    Posted by Hanyu on 2007 04 08 at 10:39 PM • permalink

  24. I propose we strike back by founding the Earth Commission for Sybaritic Excess!

    Posted by mojo on 2007 04 08 at 11:44 PM • permalink

  25. I, for one, welcome our new Thermostatic Control overlords. </I know, tired cliche>

    Posted by Dr Alice on 2007 04 09 at 12:24 AM • permalink

  26. #23. That’s cool. It means it’s not only me who is seeing the parallels.

    Posted by Contrail on 2007 04 09 at 02:31 AM • permalink

  27. Hold on now! The Tim-tastic Earth Commission for Thermostatic Control is not the only option! According to this sierraclub.org review of Flan’s book:

    He concludes on a positive, but ominous note by identifying three possible outcomes: “(1) Our response to limiting emissions is too slow or uncoordinated to avert great climate shifts, which destroy Earth’s life-support systems and destabilize our global civilization”

    Earth’s life-support systems will be destroyed but civilization is only destabilized.

    Posted by Col. Milquetoast on 2007 04 09 at 04:07 AM • permalink

  28. Makes as much sense as “positive, but ominous.”

    Posted by dean martin on 2007 04 09 at 05:27 AM • permalink

  29. Surely there is something positive to come out of all of this.

    Mugabe will be able to cash in massive carbon credits for reducing growth and population in Zimbabwe and thereby ameliorate the serious economic decline he has engineered for the ongoing benefit of all future generations.

    Posted by amortiser on 2007 04 09 at 08:43 AM • permalink

  30. Think of the carbon credits that Stalin and Mao stored up for their respective countries.

    Posted by moptop on 2007 04 09 at 09:23 AM • permalink

  31. -11c here this morning and all I talk to people about is warming!

    :)

    Posted by hollingshead on 2007 04 09 at 09:43 AM • permalink

  32. #30,

    Moptop, that’s how they can afford to sell them to other countries now.

    Posted by Ash_ on 2007 04 09 at 10:16 AM • permalink

  33. Tim, it took me a while to see this, but…..“Geothemia”?  Was there such a run on italics and bolds that you had to trade in a few “r"s to make up the difference?

    If so, you’d better replace wronwright for messing up the font books.

    Posted by The_Real_JeffS on 2007 04 09 at 05:48 PM • permalink

  34. #33
    Maybe Geothemia is some kind of AGW theme park?

    Posted by egg_ on 2007 04 10 at 07:55 AM • permalink

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