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300 MILLION REASONS FOR SAD

The Washington Post anticipates 300-million misery:

When the U.S. population surpassed 200 million on a census clock in 1967, cheers rang through the lobby of the Commerce Department, and applause interrupted President Lyndon B. Johnson’s celebratory speech.

Four decades later, however, 300 million seems to be greeted more with hand-wringing ambivalence than chest-thumping pride.

“When we hit 100 million, it was a celebration of America’s might in the world,” said Dowell Myers, a professor of urban planning and demography at the University of Southern California. “When we hit 200 million, we were solidifying our position. But at 300 million, we are beginning to be crushed under the weight of our own quality-of-life degradation.”

Degradation? A professor of urban planning and demography at the University of Southern California in 2006 is possibly—just possibly, mind—doing better than someone in a similar role one hundred years ago, when (so far as I understand American history) professors of urban planning and demography were required to sweep horse manure by night. More from the WaPo:

How will the momentous 300-million marker be celebrated in Washington?

“Those plans, believe it or not, are still being finalized,” said Robert B. Bernstein, a Census Bureau spokesman. “I don’t yet know what, if anything, we are going to do in the way of an event.”

Well, we here will be posting pictures. Massive thanks to all who’ve so far sent wonderful images of their crushed-under-the-weight-of-degradation offspring and relatives; they’ll be presented at 9.30pm Australian eastern time.

Posted by Tim B. on 10/16/2006 at 02:17 PM
  1. Would it help, Professor, if I killed myself?

    Posted by chinesearithmetic on 2006 10 16 at 02:31 PM • permalink

  2. But at 300 million, we are beginning to be crushed under the weight of our own quality-of-life degradation.

    In unrelated news, McDonald’s just announced a new healthy alternative to environmentally unsustainable beef: it’s a new type of processed food made mostly of soy and lentil beans and will come in a variety of colors. Cool!

    Posted by Brian O'Connell on 2006 10 16 at 02:52 PM • permalink

  3. Hmmmm.

    1. As an American citizen I vote we deport, *after* the party, the 20+ million illegal aliens currently in America.  That’ll bring us down to 280 million and then we can have the 300+ million party once more.

    2. Soy and lentils in different colors?

    I’ll take an order of Soylent Orange with some grated Solyent blue and a side order of Soylent Green on a Soylent Red bun.

    Hold the Soylent Chartreuse.

    Posted by memomachine on 2006 10 16 at 02:56 PM • permalink

  4. Would it help, Professor, if I killed myself?

    No, but it would help immensely if Professor Myers publicly committed suicide to show his anger over there being 300 million Americans.  Or immediately immigrated to some third world country so as to restore the balance.  Zimbabwe comes to mind, for some odd reason.

    Him being an American and all, it only makes sense that he should do something about it besides yakking.

    Posted by The_Real_JeffS on 2006 10 16 at 03:02 PM • permalink

  5. But at 300 million, we are beginning to be crushed under the weight of our own quality-of-life degradation

    I’m not sure I agree with the whole “quality-of-life degradation” argument. I admit that two more “densely packed” (i.e. people per square mile) countries have lower standards of living; China and India come immediately to mind. And I do know that even as things stand now, big cities continually battle myriad issues simply due to the concentration of large numbers of people within their boundaries. But going so far as to say “quality-of-life degradation”... that seems to me to be a bit too over the top. I think the reality is a bit more complex.

    Take population density figures into account:

    US - 31 people/sq km, highest: New Jersey, 438 people/sq km. Densest city: Guttenberg, New Jersey, 21,961 people/sq km

    India - 329 people/sq km, representative city: Mumbai, 29,434 people/sq km, may not be densest city

    China - 136.12 people/sq km, representative city: Macau, 16,521 people/sq km.)

    On the one hand, China and India have higher population densities overall. On the other hand, their crowded cities and ours are comparable in people per square kilometer. Yet US standards of living are still higher even in those cities (unless there’s a study to the contrary that I’m unaware of). So the US is capable of having populations as dense as any other country’s in the world while maintaining the US standard-of-living levels.

    But, the US is less dense overall. There’s expansion capacity left. Sure, some of it is unusable - who wants to live in the middle of the desert (No Las Vegas jokes!)? And, we can’t use up all the arable land; we still need to farm. But, my overall point is that the US shows it can handle the population densities we see in the most crowded cities in the world and still maintain a higher standard of living, while at the same time having some more expansion capacity left. So from this admittedly quick, off-the-top-of-my-head argument, I don’t see us being “crushed under the weight of our own quality-of-life degradation” because I don’t see that degradation happening yet.

    Not that it’s impossible; I just don’t think the US is at that point yet. China is, due to their lack of viable living space (parts of the Tibetan plain and the Gobi desert are just not habitable). Their government has openly talked about their population issues for years. I don’t have enough information on India to tell if they can handle more people within their borders, so I’ll withold comment on that nation. But the US… in spite of the many and myriad population issues, I simply don’t think we’re at the breaking point yet.

    Arguments to the contrary are welcome, however. I can always use more and better information that what I personally have.

    Posted by ElMondoHummus on 2006 10 16 at 03:22 PM • permalink

  6. From the CIA World Factbook:

    Area:
    total: 9,631,420 sq km
    land: 9,161,923 sq km
    water: 469,497 sq km
    note: includes only the 50 states and District of Columbia

    Well, Alaska’s pretty big, but let it ride - the population there is real low anyway.

    But for the continental US, we see a population density of
    300x10^6/9.1x10^6, or 32.96 people per sq. km

    Hardly crowded.

    Posted by mojo on 2006 10 16 at 03:43 PM • permalink

  7. Hmmmm.

    I say we:

    A. develop fusion power
    B. intersteller FTL flight
    C. high efficiency gravity generators
    D. breakup all of the solar system’s planets
    E. and build us a Ringworld
    F. make certain to kill off all the spotted owls so it’ll give the enviro-weenies something to bitch about

    But hey, that’s just my opinion so YMMV.

    Posted by memomachine on 2006 10 16 at 03:58 PM • permalink

  8. I hope there isn’t an odometer-like failure, where you wind up looking 299990001 owing to slack in the gears at the 300m mark.

    Posted by rhhardin on 2006 10 16 at 03:58 PM • permalink

  9. If we figure out a way to get rid of some of these excess people, will traffic improve? I might be for it in that case.

    Posted by Retread on 2006 10 16 at 04:04 PM • permalink

  10. I’m with ed…a Dyson sphere is the way to go.

    Even better if it was under US administration. Imagine the worldwide lefty bitching if there’s no place anywhere to get away to.

    Posted by PW on 2006 10 16 at 04:19 PM • permalink

  11. But at 300 million, we are beginning to be crushed under the weight of our own quality-of-life degradation.

    Yes, yes. That’s why the countryside is being abandoned. People move to the cities because they like being crowded and degraded.

    Posted by charlesr on 2006 10 16 at 04:38 PM • permalink

  12. Unbelievable.  Modern humans are the healthiest, wealthiest, most literate and longest-lived in history. 

    Yet, we can be made to act as skittish as superstitious, moon-howling cave-dwellers—and they really had stuff to worry about.

    What’s really behind this sort of sniping is that “professor(s) of urban planning and demography” and the rest of the academy of social ‘sciences’ daydreamers have done precious little to bring about this world.

    So the only recourse for small-minded people who’ve been bested by others is to lint-pick and cat-scratch at what they could never accomplish themselves.

    Dish of cream for the pussy cat?

    Posted by cosmo on 2006 10 16 at 04:42 PM • permalink

  13. At 300 million we figure on being the crushers rather than the crushees. Go us!

    Posted by Paul Zrimsek on 2006 10 16 at 04:50 PM • permalink

  14. I’m sure if the left could prove the 300 millionth American was an illegal who crossed the border from Mexico in the dead of the night their mood wouldn’t be so glum.

    Posted by tdw77 on 2006 10 16 at 05:08 PM • permalink

  15. I have come to the conclusion that the number of ecstatic demographers and statisticians in an enormous number.

    I base that on the adage ” ignorance is bliss”.

    Tim, sent a pic of my reason for living, my angel.

    Posted by MentalFloss on 2006 10 16 at 05:11 PM • permalink

  16. Despite all the caterwauling and clothes-rending and ashes-wallowing, I believe in technology.  Whatever problems arise, we’ll fix them sooner or later, because we’re human beings with brains and opposable thumbs, and that’s what we do.  At least, that’s what the practical, no-nonsense portion of us do.  I can’t really speak for the whimpering, fetally curled segment that calls itself “The Left”.

    Posted by RebeccaH on 2006 10 16 at 05:22 PM • permalink

  17. Mark Steyns new book “America Alone"highlights what a detrimental strawman the “overpopulation” meme of the 60’s and 70’s was.

    “Quality of life degradation”? Who is this guy kidding? FOr thoses of us willing to take even a modicum of responsibility for our own life, the quality of life here is pretty damn good! And for me a good quality of life means seeing the children in my life grow into men and women of character, delighting in beloved friendships, meaningful work, good stewardship of the blessings I have, and the freedom to openly worship my God. I’m sorry these ” chicken littles” are so incapable of seeing how blessed THEY are.

    Posted by debi L. on 2006 10 16 at 05:30 PM • permalink

  18. it’s a new type of processed food made mostly of soy and lentil beans and will come in a variety of colors.

    “It’s people! It’s peeeooopllllllllle!

    And it’s delicious!

    Hi, I’m Chuck Heston, for Kraft Soylent Green…”

    Posted by Dave S. on 2006 10 16 at 05:38 PM • permalink

  19. WTF is hand-wringing ambivalence? If you’re wringing your hands about something, it’s not too damn likely you’re ambivalent about it.

    Now I will return to rending my clothing insouciantly about the population bomb, resource depletion, running out of food, global warming, global cooling, polar bear drowning, wealth disparity and any other crackpot lunatic worries the Professor has in store for me.

    Posted by Crispytoast on 2006 10 16 at 05:40 PM • permalink

  20. At least, that’s what the practical, no-nonsense portion of us do.  I can’t really speak for the whimpering, fetally curled segment that calls itself “The Left”.

    1) Fret.
    2) Watch “The Man” solve the problem.
    3) Bitch about “The Man.”

    (see AIDs, pharmaceutical corporations.)

    Posted by Dave S. on 2006 10 16 at 05:42 PM • permalink

  21. OK It has to be done.  I’m shocked that the honor(our) falls to me.
    Degredation-I blame George Bush.

    USC is my Grad School.  Take it from me, this guy is still sweeping manure, only between 9 and 3 and Monday thru Friday.

    A serious question.  Why do you have to make a big deal out of this one way or the other?  Seems pointless.

    Posted by yojimbo on 2006 10 16 at 06:09 PM • permalink

  22. Ooops!  I didn’t mean the noble people in this thread, simply the issue in general.  Call it the “editorial you”-if you will.

    A thousand sorrows.

    Posted by yojimbo on 2006 10 16 at 06:12 PM • permalink

  23. But at 300 million, we are beginning to be crushed under the weight of our own quality-of-life degradation.

    Oh, I thought I felt something.

    I just didn’t realize it’s my quality-of-life being crushed. Feels a lot like the flu. Or, a cold.

    Posted by rinardman on 2006 10 16 at 06:16 PM • permalink

  24. Hi, I’m Chuck Heston, for Kraft Soylent Green…”

    Does the taste vary from person to person, DaveS?

    Posted by andycanuck on 2006 10 16 at 06:28 PM • permalink

  25. rinardman,
    If you live in California, you felt something else. 30 million of you live there and the whole continent is unbalancing.

    Posted by Barrie on 2006 10 16 at 06:31 PM • permalink

  26. Andycanuck.

    Is that a vegemite question?

    Posted by yojimbo on 2006 10 16 at 06:40 PM • permalink

  27. #24 Does the taste vary from person to person, DaveS?

    It probably depends on what the person eats, andyc.  Meat-eaters, pretty yummy.  Nuts-and-twigs types, not so much.

    Posted by RebeccaH on 2006 10 16 at 06:56 PM • permalink

  28. yojimbo, LAY OFF our Vegemite.
    To an Aussie it’s like commenting negatively on Mo.
    Besides, it’s made from the dregs from beer brewing, and we can’t supply the rest of the world without drinking a whole lot more.

    Posted by Barrie on 2006 10 16 at 06:57 PM • permalink

  29. The 300 million tickover could also mark the commencement of the Voluntary Human Extinction program.

    Professors of urban planing and demography please form an orderly queue.

    Posted by fidens on 2006 10 16 at 06:58 PM • permalink

  30. Barrie

    Wasn’t woofing at vegemite.  No offense mate.  Still, I do like that increase in supply methodology.  You could get by with that on humanitarian grounds or something.  Heh!  Only five more weeks till the invasion of the basbarians.

    Fidens

    That would be the “Logans Run” for college profs.  An excellent idea.  We should get Wron on tht right away, i.e. before the election.

    Posted by yojimbo on 2006 10 16 at 07:28 PM • permalink

  31. That would be barbarians but basbarians might work to.

    Posted by yojimbo on 2006 10 16 at 07:32 PM • permalink

  32. #25 Barrie
    No, fortunately, I don’t live in California, but the Great Midwest.

    But, I agree, California is unbalanced!

    Posted by rinardman on 2006 10 16 at 08:24 PM • permalink

  33. Does the taste vary from person to person, DaveS?

    Yes. Paris Hilton is salty, with a bleachy nose.

    Posted by Dave S. on 2006 10 16 at 08:30 PM • permalink

  34. Hating people/hating life.  That’s what this is really about.

    Posted by saltydog on 2006 10 16 at 08:35 PM • permalink

  35. Everyone is doing Soylent Green jokes, but no Logan’s Run references.

    Oh, thats probably because Logan’s Run was rubbish.

    Posted by attilathepun on 2006 10 16 at 08:45 PM • permalink

  36. 31: For some reason, I really like “basbarians”. We must find a use for it!

    Posted by paco on 2006 10 16 at 09:26 PM • permalink

  37. Basbarians:

    Muslim inhabitants of Basarabia.

    Posted by trainer on 2006 10 16 at 10:05 PM • permalink

  38. #37: We have a WINNA!

    Posted by paco on 2006 10 16 at 10:09 PM • permalink

  39. E. and build us a Ringworld

    Rishathra all around!

    Posted by Rob Crawford on 2006 10 16 at 10:26 PM • permalink

  40. Basarabia…which I think is short for Bassackwardsarabia.

    Or something.

    Posted by rinardman on 2006 10 16 at 10:57 PM • permalink

  41. Oh, thats probably because Logan’s Run was rubbish.

    What?! It was magnificent rubbish!

    Off to Carousel with you!

    Carousel! Carousel!

    Posted by Dave S. on 2006 10 16 at 10:59 PM • permalink

  42. Drudge headline 300,000,001.

    It is a link, that takes you here and counting.


    Soon to be 300,000,000 Americans…umm rather 300,000,000 people in America, MOST of them, are Americans.

    Wish us luck, folks, we need all the help we can get.

    Posted by El Cid on 2006 10 16 at 11:18 PM • permalink

  43. Bessarabia?

    Cheers

    Posted by J.M. Heinrichs on 2006 10 17 at 12:16 AM • permalink

  44. I just read an article that by 2043, the US is projected to have a population of 400 million. And China is reproducing well below replacement rate at 1.7 children per woman. China has zero immigration. At some point, if present trends continue, the US will be bigger than China, population wise.

    In Europe, deaths will start outnumbering births in 4 years.

    Now we are 300,000,000

    Posted by moptop on 2006 10 17 at 01:09 AM • permalink

  45. #36—Paco, it’s w-a-a-ay off the running topic, but basbarian sounds to me like a pretty good neologism for redneck bass fishermen.  (fisherpersons?)

    Posted by Celaeno on 2006 10 17 at 01:51 AM • permalink

  46. #45 Anglers.

    Posted by MentalFloss on 2006 10 17 at 03:41 AM • permalink

  47. Words fail me. Doom mongering boom.

    I never realised that one of the biggest dramas Americans faced, are your over crowded sidewalks.

    Posted by Infidel Tiger on 2006 10 17 at 04:29 AM • permalink

  48. P.S. Notice the picture accompanying the video.

    And the money quote; “complicating the issue, is that Americans are living longer than ever”. How dare you not die at an appropriate age.

    Posted by Infidel Tiger on 2006 10 17 at 04:34 AM • permalink

  49. It’s all Wronwright’s fault. We had a team in from John Hopkins to check the Tardis’ log, and the horny little devil is responsible for at least 2,000,000 of those pregnancies last year alone.

    And that’s just in Bird’s Landing, near Montezuma Slough, in the Central California Delta area.

    The Lancet has peer reviewed and confirmed this statistic and will publish it next week.

    MarkL
    Canberra

    Posted by MarkL on 2006 10 17 at 07:46 AM • permalink

  50. My Soylent Green tastes funny. It was probably made from some clown.

    Posted by Brian O'Connell on 2006 10 17 at 08:01 AM • permalink

  51. Damn people such as these, these or these that use those machines, or these to view this.

    Despite efforts to move, contain or kill these or these, this document  and to this point in time, women and men of reason, have prevailed.

    We are terribly sorry world, we keep trying to lessen our population via this, or these, even these. People still keep coming to live under this symbol and keep having these.

    I don’t understand it myself. Maybe, just maybe the blame is with these souls and these brave souls that make sure this is always on the rise, regardless the enemy.

    Posted by El Cid on 2006 10 17 at 09:16 AM • permalink

  52. #46—Izaak and Dame Juliana would certainly agree, and it’s much more graceful.  Grace, alas, I fear is not much in keeping with today’s tin-eared PC formulations.

    Posted by Celaeno on 2006 10 17 at 07:54 PM • permalink

  53. #35 - Take a closer look at #30.

    And Logan’s Run rocked.

    Posted by Achillea on 2006 10 17 at 10:03 PM • permalink

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